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Finders Fee (Jeff Probst 2001)

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(siren blaring)
(dog barking)
Quigley!
TV Host: Spin again and risk it all,
or walk the plank and risk your life.
(audience chanting) Walk the plank! Walk the plank!
- Mrs. Darmstetter? - It is a big one.
Oh, hi!
You left your door open again.
Heaven's sake, I wonder how that happened.
So, how is everything?
Well, I'm worried about my mail.
I think someone's stealing it,
because I haven't received any letters from my kids
in a long time, and they always write.
Are they taking all your mail or just the letters?
No, just the letters.
You'd think they'd take everything else, wouldn't you? But they don't.
Yeah, well, I'll talk to the super about it, okay?
And if you want, I'll keep an eye out, too.
Thanks, hon.
I...
I got dessert.
For heaven's sake, I couldn't eat that whole thing.
Okay.
I suppose I could eat some of it now,
and save the rest for later.
- I suppose. Here you go. - Thank you.
I'm gonna be home tonight, if you need anything, all right?
- Good. - Okay.
- Bye, me too. - Yeah? Okay.
... Like an angel
From above
Bring me home
Oh, you bring me love
I was lonely
Until you showed me
- You made me feel those things... - Hey, babe.
- Hey. - I never felt before...
I know, I'm early. I'm not gonna stay.
I just can't stop thinking about tonight.
I had to see you. Are you mad, hmm?
Well, you know, we did say after rehearsal, right?
I know, and I'll be back after rehearsal.
I just had to make sure you weren't having any second thoughts.
This is a good thing for us, you know.
After rehearsal, Carla.
How hard is it to fix a leak?
My outside key didn't work again, either.
That guy with the dog finally let me in.
I called the guy eight times already. Fix the damn leak.
Just fix it.
So, you told Dwight you were gonna be out of town this weekend, huh?
- Is that the story? - Yeah, I know.
I don't get it.
I don't get it, Tepp.
Why lie?
Why not just say, "Dwight, I can't do it." Huh?
There's nothing wrong with that, if it's how you feel.
- It's easier. - Yeah?
Except now, you can't even come see my show.
I'll say my plans fell through.
Why go through all that trouble? It doesn't make any sense.
You know what? Here's Tepper.
Here's Tepper, and here's the truth.
And you go all the way around,
just to end up right back where you started,
where you could have been straight up front in the first place.
TV: If these are your numbers, you're six million richer!
It's silly.
As silly as pretending
to not check your numbers, when I know you do.
- So, I'll see you tonight, right? - Yeah.
- You'll be here? - Yep.
Yeah?
I'm just confirming that we have a date tonight.
Carla, you waited six months, right?
- Uh-huh. - Do you want to spoil the whole thing?
No, not if it's a good thing.
I'll see you tonight.
Have fun with your poker buddies.
Okay.
And I'll see you tonight.
Elephant juice.
I love you too.
Hey, loser, it's Coop. Can't make it tonight.
Order for delivery, please.
Name's Tepper.
- What listing, please? - Avery Phillips.
- What city? - Manhattan.
Checking Avery Phillips. No listing in Manhattan.
- Any other boroughs? - No, sir.
- Okay, thanks. - Thank you.
Avery, you should keep a number in here, buddy.
Recording: No one is available right now.
Please leave your message after the tone.
Hi, Victor. If this is you,
I found a wallet tonight.
It belongs to an Avery Phillips.
Your number was inside the wallet.
So if you know this guy, have him call me.
My name is Tepper,
and I'm at 555-0186.
Actually, I'm gonna be here all night,
so if you want to tell him to stop by, he can.
My address is 411 West 13th Ave, apartment #7.
And if this isn't Victor,
sorry to bother you, man. Bye.
10.
23.
91.
(intercom buzzes)
Yeah?
It's Fish, I'm standing in a river out here, let me in.
Come on up, Fish.
Recording: Tonight's Big Three jackpot is worth $6 million.
The winning numbers are: 10...
23... 91.
To hear the numbers again,
press one.
Tonight's Big Three jackpot is worth $6 million.
The winning numbers are: 10...
23... 91.
91! 91!
10, 23, 91! Okay, right!
Hey, Fish, you're not gonna believe this.
Do you ever check the numbers before we play?
What?
Just say the word. Do you ever check the numbers before we play?
- No. - No. Of course not. Why?
'Cause the rule is, you don't look.
You don't look. I don't look. Bolan doesn't look. Cooper doesn't look.
But that pinhead Quigley, look, it's numbers time,
and he's got his freaking TV on, so loud I can hear him from the stairwell.
And look, I'm not saying he's checking the numbers
but that kid put the thought in my head. You know I don't trust him, right?
I don't trust that kid. Why you're friends with him
makes no sense to me at all. He's gonna rub off on you.
You know that little rodent mole stink he's got?
It's gonna rub off on you. Wake up one day be like,
"Jesus Christ, Mary, Joseph, what is that stink?
Oh my God, I smell like Quigley."
Better yet, wake up in 40 years
and not have a friend, it's 'cause of him.
Some people, they don't get it. He doesn't get it.
Give to the Red Cross, give to the United Way,
but this whole friendship charity crap has got to stop.
I'm done. I just need a beer.
I need a beer like a crack whore needs a big fat rock.
And please, tell me you did not just buy them across the street,
from the little punk who's too cheap to turn on his freezer.
Oh, you're killing me, Tepp.
Cold beer one week, that's all I ask for.
We're playing unlimited tonight. None of this 50 cents max crap.
You know I owe everyone.
- (intercom buzzes) - Wanna bet that's Bolan?
Bet you it's Bolan and he's got to take a piss.
- Yeah? - Tepper?
It's Fishman. Get your ass and bladder up here.
Fish, let me ask you something.
I found some guy's wallet on my way home today.
No phone number. No driver's license. Nothing.
I left a message with this guy named Victor
whose number was in the wallet.
Got any money in it?
- No. I don't want the money. - Don't say you don't want the money!
'Cause if you don't want the money, I want the money!
Okay, but I'm just trying to figure out what I should do with it.
In this city what do you do, give it to a cop?
Better chance of throwing it out the window and him getting it.
So, what you're saying, I should just...
forget it? Don't worry about it?
If the guy's not smart enough to put his number in the wallet, screw him!
- (knocking) - I'll get it.
You're right. It's just...
Get rid of it.
- Holy cow, I gotta pee. - You're consistent, I'll give you that.
I've been holding in so long, it hurts.
Shouldn't hold it in. Wear your bladder out, have to wear diapers.
That's all I need... sterile and wearing Depends.
- At least I still got my hair. - Easy!
We're playing unlimited tonight, none of this 50 max bullcrap.
Oh boy, I think I may have done permanent damage this time.
You guys can say what you want but those pills are working.
Thick as muff, this thing.
I feel good.
I look good.
I shouldn't be playing at all tonight, so much going on with Carla.
We should make it an early one tonight, okay?
So start already!
What the deuce?
10 to one on Five it says it rains all night.
You know, statistically, I never win when it's wet.
- (knocking) - I hate this crap!
Yeah, Jake Poster, please.
What's up, Fish? What's up fellas?
Who do you like tomorrow? SC or Notre Dame?
- Are you making a bet? - I'm having phone sex with your wife.
- Who do you like? - Notre Dame.
Poster, it's Fish. Give me three bills on SC.
- Yeah, that's very funny. - Thanks.
I'm the one who played college ball. You never ask me.
Suiting up is not playing.
Gotta win some cash tonight. You know I got guys after me?
That's 'cause you bet with money you don't have.
Stopped by work with a two by four, missed me by five minutes.
- I brought wine. - Hey, more pilferage.
Bolan, don't! It's not pilferage, we're allotted so much a month.
Yeah, for business.
For whatever, I am a wine salesman. Everybody does it. It's part of the job.
This a Bar-Mitzvah? You don't bring wine to poker, for crying out loud.
My friends, it's time to play.
We need to get it moving here, I'm popping the question tonight.
So, bet big early with the deuce.
We're here five minutes, getting grief already.
I'm just saying, a bottle here, a bottle there.
Please, stop the lecture.
Look, if one of my counselors takes home a box of pencils,
it's three bucks, it's no big deal, right?
But if everybody takes home a box, that's 300 bucks,
and somebody's paying for that...
me. Companies lose billions in employee theft.
Oh, now it's theft!
That's his point. That's what pilfering is, it's theft!
You know what? Screw you, guys. If you don't want to drink it, don't.
- I'm not coming down on you, boy. - Yeah, you are, Bolan. You always are.
- Dance with me. - I don't want to dance with you, Bolan.
When was the last time you loved yourself?
Okay, Bolan, you've got to stop with the therapy.
No, it's not therapy this time. It was a seminar.
Power of suggestion. Change your life.
Save your breath, Bolan.
The Quigley Mantra will always remain the same.
"What they don't know, won't hurt them."
- Am I right, Tepper? - Yeah, I'm staying out of that.
You know what? You guys got to learn to live a little.
Open yourself up to new things, you know?
Hey.
How was "Jeopardy"? Or was it "Wheel"?
I forgot.
Hey, Tepp. What is it that comes on
right after the lottery numbers?
- I don't watch that stuff. - Fish?
- Must have been another apartment. - Did you guys see the ring he scored?
- What the hell's he talking about? - Under the second drawer.
What is he talking about?
- This is great. - Got that for two bills.
Look at that.
- Fell off a truck, did it? - Something like that.
It's a starter ring, he can move up later.
Looks like your kind of ring, Quigley.
You're smart not to invest a lot.
It's nothing towards Carla, but marriage can really suck.
No, your marriage sucked. 'Cause you're an idiot!
Carla's a keeper.
Love that girl.
Give me this.
Hey, Tepp!
- Now, that's class! - Stolen ring?
- Great way to start a marriage. - It's perfect, it's just what I wanted.
Gimme a hand with this.
Depending on what date you set,
I've got to get you up to camp.
You hang out with the kids.
It's an experience, it will bring you closer.
- Okay. - Okay? One more thing,
Dance class. Come with me.
- Yeah. - Okay.
Carla knows something's happening tonight, right?
Something damn well better happen. She gave him the six-month deadline.
It wasn't a deadline.
Time to think, whatever. The point is, you made the right choice.
Tepp, when you do it,
do it right.
Get down on one knee.
Make her feel cherished.
I mean, she'll never forget it.
I hope these are okay. Best I could find on a short notice.
They should have cost 10, but they were in the $5 bin.
So, we got a deal. What?
The guy says to put them in the fridge and keep them fresh for tonight.
Hey, Quigley, it's cool, don't worry about it.
- You guys want a beer? - Yeah!
Grab mine, it's on the counter.
- And a water. - And wine for the whiner.
Tepp, listen, if you decide that later
you wanna give Carla something a little more substantial,
let me know, okay?
'Cause I got a guy,
and he can hook you up, he can trade that thing in,
get you something real special, okay?
- Okay, great! - Okay.
- What? - "I got a guy."
"I got a guy."
- Where's Coop? - He's not coming.
What do you mean he's not coming? That putz owes me 50 bucks.
Listen to me, Tepper. He calls and I wanna talk to his ass.
Six million tonight, fellows, and it's all mine!
Mary must have squeezed your brain. You ain't taking shit.
- All right, I'm bank. - There's a surprise!
And we're playing unlimited tonight. None of this 50 max bullshit.
Let's get that chair out. What are you doing? You sit here.
- Will you turn that shit down!? - I'm sitting here tonight.
- That's not your seat. You sit here. - Who cares where he sits?
- I do! - Yeah, I'm sitting here tonight.
That's not his seat, that's Coop's seat. You sit here.
Fine!
Like an old lady.
Thank you. Cough it up, let's go.
Let's go!
What's this? This isn't enough. We're playing unlimited tonight.
We're not playing unlimited tonight.
Yeah, you know I might have in the other chair over here.
But not now!
50 max, three raises limit.
Same as always, buddy.
Thank you for your help. Thank you very much.
You're welcome.
Tepp!
- The wine. - Oh. Okay, yeah.
Thanks, Teppo!
- What is this? - $10.
$10? Quigley, you've got to be freakin' kidding me!
- That's all I've got. Lay off! - Every week, it's the same thing.
The cab ride over costs more. You know that, right?
You've got to get married if only for the food.
- You want me to walk? - (intercom buzzes)
Now, we're talking. I got it.
You've got big brother Bolan, come back.
Good evening, this is Avery Phillips.
- I'm here about the wallet. - Yeah, one second!
What happened? Holy shit, what d'you do?
- Nothing, I just cut myself. - Well, do you have a Band-Aid or...
- peroxide? - I'm fine.
See now this is the perfect time
to have your sweetie wrap that thing up for you and kiss your little face.
Why don't you get the wine for Quigley? Bring it in.
Intercom: Hello?
Hey, Tepper damn near pulled a Bobbit opening your pilferage.
I had an opener.
Wine and poker are like horse and church, they don't belong together.
- Tepp, I had an opener! - Intercom: Hello?
You think I'd show up here without an opener?
Nobody's thinking about you at all, Quigley.
- Yeah? - This is Avery Phillips.
- Yeah? - You found my wallet.
- Yeah. You're Avery? - Yes.
You called my brother-in-law Victor.
Can I come up?
Yeah. Come on up, Avery.
So listen, I cop a squat and I drop a deuce.
Hey, Tepp, what are you doing at the door?
The guy with the wallet, he's coming by to pick it up.
I thought you said there wasn't anything in it.
How the hell am I supposed to know? The guy wants his wallet.
This shit was so big, Mary couldn't believe it.
You call your wife in when you take a dump?
I'm proud of it. What? I've got no secrets.
- That's sick! - That's intimacy.
Tepp, stop banging on your freakin' leg already. You're driving me nuts!
So look, the point is,
this thing's so big, I clog the freaking bowl.
It cost me 65 bucks to snake it.
I can't believe your wife actually has sex with you.
You know what? Twice last night and once again this morning.
And it's off the charts.
Pretty soon she's gonna be all pregnant,
and I'll be kissing that belly, rubbing her little feet.
Big brother Bolan's gonna be big Papa.
Tepp, my sperm, they're screaming for nourishment.
What's up with the food?
- Tepper? - Yeah.
I'm Avery Phillips. I can't tell you how much I appreciate this.
In New York City, this doesn't happen.
- You're a good soul. - It's no problem.
It's still kind of wet.
It's mine, all right.
I hope everything's in there.
- That's how I found it. - I'm sure it is.
- Good luck to you. - Would you mind
if I used your phone, called my wife, let her know I found it?
She's worried sick about the credit cards.
Unless you're in the middle of something?
No, No. It's no problem.
It's fine. Come on in.
Noah's Arc out there.
- Phone's in the kitchen. - I won't be just a minute.
So, what's the deal? You found this guy's wallet?
- Yep! - Teppo did his good deed for the day.
It's not gonna help him tonight, though.
Did you take the money?
There wasn't any in it.
That's what most people do. They take the money, leave the wallet.
It's what the putz before him did.
No! That's a solid thing you did.
You know what, that comes back to you.
Yap, yap, yap. Bolan, it's your game.
Closest to bull gets the deal.
Let's go!
I'm so zoned in tonight, fellas.
20 minutes, haven't won a dollar yet.
Can you get ahold of her?
No. One phone's not enough with a house full of girls.
- Darts, huh? - That's a sign you're hearing.
Yeah, closest to bull. You want in?
His wife is worried. He's got to get home.
- It takes two minutes. - Fish, the guy lost his wallet.
He doesn't have any money on him.
- I got money. - Avery.
You're gonna let this guy sucker you? He's gonna take all your money.
- Yeah, then lose it. - It's a buck!
I haven't played darts in years and years.
You know, why don't you give me the number?
You give me the number and I'll call her your wife, and...
I gotta take a shot at that bull.
If that's all right?
Yeah, that's all right, you got a buck, you're in.
Tepp, get the man a dart. Let's go! Chop-chop.
- I'm Bolan. - Avery.
- Nice to meet you. - I'm Fishman, I need a dollar.
Let's rock and roll.
So let's start. Come on, guys, you say you wanna play
but then you sit around and yack all night.
- Quigley, just throw. You go first. - I'm up. Let's do this.
Don't come from here, come from here. Feel it.
Yeah, I'm feeling it, Bolan.
- The story of my life! - You weren't feeling it.
You weren't feeling it. Watch me. Watch where it comes from, okay?
Watch where it comes from.
Center. Center. Center.
I'm feeling that. Tepp throw.
Oh yeah, notice who's going last.
What's that? I can't hear you with my dick in your mouth.
Think about what you're doing, buddy.
See? Now Tepp's feeling it. See, he's feeling it.
Aren't you glad you don't have to listen to this all night?
Are you kidding? I'm enjoying this.
I haven't been out with the fellas for a long time.
- This is for the deal, right? - No!
- Can you just throw the dart, please? - Yeah, but...
You know what? I think that Avery should get the last shot.
- What do you think? - That's fine.
Don't get me wrong, normally I'd say stay.
Tonight, it's gonna be a little night.
A couple hands, tops.
I nail it, I don't get nothin'? Wax on, wax off.
I can't say no to a game of cards, even if it's only one hand.
You get a shirt. You get a new shirt. I got new shirts.
Fish, look at this guy, don't take advantage of him.
Come on, Avery! Kick his ass.
Kick his ass. I'm gonna bet you a dollar that he kicks your ass!
A whole dollar? You're on!
Yeah! He kicked your ass! You owe me a buck.
Well, easy five bucks, huh, Avery?
You're still a barely employed borderline alcoholic with no future.
You know what? Let's get you out of here.
...make your life tolerable, your little dollar.
Let's play cards.
- Won a buck. - Avery, let me get your stuff.
- (sirens blaring outside) - Hear that? Something's going down.
Who's bleeding?
- Tepper, bleeding like a little girl. - Don't get your blood on it.
- Let me get your box. The rain thing. - That's all? Only one game?
Why don't you sit down? We're just getting started.
Check it out.
- You did win the deal. - It's low stakes.
Somewhat friendly.
I can get you an umbrella. A real one.
- Sounds real tempting. - I got like 100 extra.
This game could use the money, let me tell you.
We got an open chair.
Here's your new shirt.
Told you. Two cop cars out front. Middle of the street, baby.
You don't have to twist my arm.
No, guys!
No.
Not tonight.
It's just not a good night.
A got a lot on my mind and, uh...
I'm getting engaged tonight.
Any other night, it would be a good night, but...
tonight's not a good night. I'm sorry.
No, I'm sorry, Tepp. You're absolutely right.
- You got a lot on your mind. - There's cops everywhere, guys.
It's all right, Bolan. It's just, it's not a good night.
Thanks for understanding, Avery.
I'm the one sorry. I didn't mean to overstay my welcome.
Oh, for crying out loud. Is this a poker game or an AA meeting?
- Everyone's so sorry about everything. - You know what?
Another night, huh, Avery?
- Drop by again. - Sure.
I won't forget what you did.
- Good night. - Good night.
Get back in your apartment. Close and lock your doors, sir.
What, are you deaf? Get your ass back in your apartment!
This isn't his apartment.
I don't care whose apartment it is, close the door!
(intercom buzzes)
- Oh, it's got to be the food. - They're gonna seal her up.
Hello?
This is Officer Campbell, NYPD.
We've secured your building for police investigation.
Do not open your door until you hear from an officer.
We should get you out of here now,
before you get stuck in the building.
No, no. I'll wait a second.
That is a smart man.
Guys, they closed off the building. We're on lockdown.
- Hey, what'd I tell ya? - Tepp, lock that door.
I don't want to get shot.
The roof is next. Then they're going to go door to door.
There's one guy that needs to get out,
he needs to get home. Just real quick, okay, man?
Hello, NYPD?
Avery...
I know I know you. What do you do?
I'm a...
I'm a bus driver.
There goes that, huh, Bolan? Last bus you took was short and yellow.
Hey, make sure that's a cop.
Hey, Mrs. Darmstetter. How you doing?
Honey, why are all the police here?
You know, I'm trying to find that out myself.
- They're all over the place. - Yeah.
Go back in your apartment, I'll find out what's going on.
Okay.
Hey, Mrs. Darmstetter?
Lock your door and stay there until I tell you it's okay.
You'll let me know?
Yeah, I'll tell you.
I can't believe they can close down an entire building.
Only in New York.
Look, Avery, I'm sorry. If you want, I'll walk down with you.
Whatever, you didn't hear the cop?
We're closed up. He's not going anywhere.
He's stayin' and he's playin'.
Huh? Am I right, Ave?
Well, I must say,
it gives a convenient excuse.
Thank you.
Fate throws that in your lap, you gotta grab it. Am I right?
Avery, let me get that for you.
It's a 50 max, three raise limit.
Give me your cash and I'll give you some chips.
Heretofore known as the bank.
Hey, Tepp? Where you going?
- Getting something to drink. - You got drink.
Sit the butt.
Look, I'm not a card player.
You just tell me when to bet and I'll do it.
Who-o! That's what I like to hear!
Why don't you get on him for 10 bucks, huh?
You grow a set of balls with that beard?
He did have the lucky throw. It's your deal.
Oh, uh...
Somebody else should go first.
- Oh, I'll deal. - Ah! Deal goes to Grizzly Adams.
Six of hearts, six of hearts, six of hearts.
Just deal, Kreskin.
Come on, Quigley. Deal.
Tepp, what's with these cards? They're all the same.
I don't know.
Carla got them at the MGM Grand in Vegas.
That's the way they came.
It's not a salad. Deal.
- Seven card, no peek. - Already with the monkey games.
Keep it up. I like wild cards.
(imitates monkey) Monkey games.
- Tepp. - Sorry.
Tepp, no peekie.
- Guys, it doesn't matter. - It changes the way he bets.
It's okay. I gotta leave a message with Carla anyway.
See? Now he knows he doesn't have a hand.
Tepps, we're one card in.
Hey.
When you talk to her, don't forget what I said.
Way he's acting you'd think he's getting circumcised, not engaged.
He is getting circumcised. He's getting married.
Hey.
- What's up? - Sorry, didn't mean to scare you.
No problem, no problem at all.
I gotta get some new silverware.
This is getting ridiculous, you know?
Listen, I want to thank you again.
My whole life was in that wallet.
Well, you know, I'm glad it worked out for you.
Mind if I try again?
Oh. Yeah, sure.
Do you mind?
You want some privacy, I'm sure.
- I was on "All My Children" last week. - No way. That's Mary's favorite show.
Hello?
You make some pretty decent coin doing soaps.
A guy in my office hooked up Susan Lucci, 10 rooms, Upper East Side.
- This guy's on the phone all night. - What block?
- Can't tell you. - What do you mean, can't tell me?
- Stalkers and shit, I can't tell you. - He doesn't know.
The fuck I don't.
I know where a lot of people live and I can't tell you.
Come on, Fish. Mary loves that kind of stuff.
Who's gonna stalk Susan Lucci?
I don't know, Bolan. But say I tell you, okay?
And some freakin' freak overhears, goes to her house and she goes down.
Cops, the media, the papers... what happened? Nobody knows.
I know, okay? I know. 'Cause I'm the one that talked.
What are you saying, that you got code?
Yeah, I got code. What's the fuck's the matter with you? I got code.
I don't rat. I don't cheat. And I don't pay for sex.
Now deal. As a matter of fact, you lose the deal,
'cause you took too freakin' long.
- Texas hold 'em. - You know what, I got a code too.
Yes, you do, Quigley. It's messed up, but you got one.
Bolan got code. Bolan got code so pure
he don't even have to think about it. Just is.
But this kid,
jury's still out on this kid.
He doesn't even hear me.
You have the number?
What are you looking for, Avery?
I need a pencil.
That's silverware.
Here you go. Here's a pencil.
What?
You know, honey, you're right. You call him for me.
Thank you, sweetheart.
We have to call work and tell them we won't be in tonight.
Hey, Frick and Frack, we're playing Texas Hold 'em. Are you in or out?
- Sure. - Put a little hip in that hop.
So how old are your girls, Avery?
One's eight, the other just turned 10 last week.
October, that's the same as mine. I got a five-year-old.
They're my grand daughters, actually,
just living with us for a while.
Mine's in Florida. Lives with her mom.
For now, anyways. She's...
she's got this prick lawyer.
Dumb Cuban,
going out of his way to make me look bad.
I got a job.
Got a suit, got a tie. I'm walking the walk.
I don't know what the hell else they want.
Maybe they want you to move to Florida and be a real father?
I would do that in a heartbeat if I ever get out of debt.
You don't even know what debt is, Quigley.
You ever been divorced? Then shut your front door.
Hey, Avery, eight and 10's a good age, huh?
Phyllis is already into boys and baseball.
She's convinced she's gonna marry this Derek Jeter fellow.
I bet against Jeter, once.
Once, never again. Kid killed me in the ninth.
So good. Renaissance man, that guy.
Avery... does she have an autograph?
Well, how about that?
Think she'd like it?
What's that?
Your granddaughter. Think she'd like to have it?
Damn Tepp, you already found the guy's wallet.
Yeah, I think you've done enough for me already.
I don't have any use for it. It just sits there.
Tepp, you love that card.
I don't love the card. It's just a card.
It's a pretty nice offer.
Yeah, for a guy you wanted gone a beer ago.
I'm your best friend. You never gave my daughter anything like that.
- Since when you his best friend? - And you are?
- More than you. - Guys. What's the big deal?
Avery, it'd make me happy if you took it.
Damn, Avery. Take the card.
All right.
That doesn't mean I gotta let you win, does it?
All right, everyone's happy.
Could we play some freakin' cards now?
Can you never just enjoy a nice moment?
Bone me. Play cards.
Hey, Tepp, I tried that elephant juice thing today.
- It works. - What's elephant juice?
When you say "elephant juice," it looks like "I love you."
I'm the one who told Tepp about it.
Well, it sounds like Dumbo coming in your hair.
It's romantic.
It's 5th grade, it's talking around it.
You're getting married and you still can't say, "I love you"?
I can say it.
- When was the last time? - When was the last time you said it?
February '89, Paula Valley.
Took her to a Prince concert, we rented a limo,
we wore purple, and I told her I loved her.
- To get in her pants. - No.
I meant it.
I did get in her pants. But when I said it, I meant it.
Well, it's not the same thing.
Okay.
But don't think Carla doesn't know what you're doing, 'cause she knows.
I respect you for not saying it if you don't mean it,
but if you mean it, I think you should say it.
Amen to that.
Good or bad... truth.
The only way to go.
Right on.
Cop: Roof is secure.
You hear that? They're on our floor.
NYPD.
Doing an apartment search and going door to door.
Doing the old lady and we are next.
I got to use the facility.
If they're checking apartments, they'll want to check the bathroom.
Not if I was just in there.
No need for that.
Well then wait two seconds, say hello, then go do your business.
No, I'll just say a little hello through the door.
(knocking)
- Yeah, don't worry, Avery. - NYPD.
We'll cover for you.
Guy's acting like an ass, huh? Sketchy.
Simon says, open the door.
Campbell, NYPD. I'm gonna have to look around.
All right, Raymond. Come on out.
Good thing that the game is not going that late.
Raymond!
I hate the cops.
Who the hell are you? Get out of the tub.
I got a bum leg, just let me, uh...
Get out.
Okay, okay.
Come on, here we go. Up, up.
There you go.
Step out in the other room, put your hands on the sink.
All right, what's the story here? Somebody talk.
Tepp, go ahead. You're the one pointing like an arrow. Talk.
I don't know. You guys said you were looking for someone, right?
And Avery, we just met him tonight. We don't know who he is.
And as soon as you knocked on the door,
he wanted to go run and hide in the bathroom.
Three Mary two, three Mary name.
Last of Phillips, first of Avery.
Avery, I didn't know. You just were acting weird.
Officer, we were just trying to be cautious.
Yeah, that the deal, Officer. You never know about people.
All right, Avery Phillips. You got a driver's license,
something with your face on it?
I did. It's not in there?
Nope.
Somebody must have lifted it.
I lost my wallet earlier tonight
and Tepper here called me over to pick it up.
Yeah, it's true. I was just trying to do the right thing.
I didn't know it was missing.
- You're a fireman, huh? - Retired.
I drive a city bus now.
New York's bravest.
Stub your toe, you're a hero.
We get shot, we had it coming.
What's your route?
What's that?
Bus route.
Bronx.
Specifically where?
Broadway.
All right, Avery.
You're not who I'm looking for.
And I'm sorry about that, I'm ready to go home.
But I am curious to know why you were hiding.
Well, it's kind of complicated.
You see, I got a couple of parking tickets.
Parking tickets?
Like I say, it's kind of confusing.
See, l... I'm trying to get them sorted out.
I don't know the status.
Radio: Phillips, first of Avery. Two warrants out of Queens.
Failure to pay parking tickets.
Well, I'll give you a little update.
They're warrants, that's their status. You're wanted.
City bus driver, you could lose your job.
I'm aware.
- You a family man? - Yes.
Why would a man jeopardize his livelihood
over a couple of parking tickets?
They were unjust and I'm contesting them.
Well, aren't you the moral one?
You need to arrest me? Go ahead.
If I decide I have to rap you with my nightstick
upside that brave head of yours, I'll do so.
I don't need your permission.
All right, consider tonight a gift.
Enjoy it.
You know, Avery really just wants
to go home. His wife is worried.
Well then Avery shouldn't have wasted my time.
I'll tell you when you can leave.
All of you.
Oh, boy, Avery. You gotta be kidding me.
You run from the cops, you got warrants.
You're a black man in this city and you get off?
That doesn't happen. Toto, wake me up.
There were some definite power issues going on.
Look, Avery, l...
I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to get you in trouble.
I understand.
Hey, what were you trying to do?
- What? - What were you trying to do?
What do you mean? You guys weren't thinking the same thing?
Soon as he heard the knock he wanted to go run and hide in the bathroom.
You know what, Tepp, I don't care what went on, but
with all he's got on his mind, I guess it's expected.
The fireman's fine, all right? False alarm.
Zip it, skip it. Let's play some cards, huh?
- You okay? - Yeah.
You sure?
Yeah.
Wait a second. Avery Phillips.
Avery Phillips. I knew I recognized that name!
You're Mr. Fire Safety.
You spoke at my dad's summer camp.
Echo Lake.
Oh, sure.
You're a hero. Hey, this guy's a hero.
- Tepp, I told you about this, right? - Yeah, yeah, that's wild.
He saved his partner's life.
Pulled his partner out of a hole with his leg, this man.
With his freaking leg, he pulled him out.
- That was a long time ago. - Still a hero.
If you're a hero, why are you driving busses?
Quigley!
I got a pretty big family to feed, and...
disability just doesn't go far enough, so...
Say, Mr. Fire Safety,
I don't know if you heard about it, but...
- my dad passed a year and half ago. - Oh, gee, I'm sorry, man.
Oh, no, thank you.
But anyway, I'm running the camp now, and we're doing great.
We got all these kids with special needs, and...
we just got to get you back to camp!
Okay. Story time's over.
What do you say we play a little poker, huh?
Any poker at this point!
Wild card, seven card, peekie, no peekie, I don't give a deuce!
I just wanna play some cards, please?
Thank you.
You know, I say we play Last Man. Juice things up a bit, huh?
We haven't played a game of regular yet.
- You're not the boss. Come on. - Yeah, you're not the boss of us.
- So we'll play regular after? - Yeah.
- I thought you didn't give a deuce. - That's fine. Avery...
We play for lottery tickets. Last man standing takes them all.
- Do you have a ticket? - Yes.
Actually, Avery, why don't we trade places here?
I think this seat's going to be a little more comfortable on your knee.
Then I can sit over here in Coop's seat.
Oh, that's nice. I like that. It's soft.
You are unbelievable.
Tepp, let's go. Ante in.
Oh, yeah...
- I'm not in this week. - The hell you aren't.
What do you mean, you're not in?
- I forgot to buy a ticket. - That's bullshit! You're in.
I'm serious. It just slipped my mind.
You don't have a ticket at all?
Sorry, I had a busy day.
I meant to buy one on my way home.
But then I found Avery's wallet, and...
I don't know, I guess I just forgot.
Well, then I guess you don't mind
if we check in your little hiding spot.
Go ahead. Knock yourself out, Sherlock.
- It's not that we don't believe you. - I've got nothing to hide, Quigley.
How do you live with yourself?
How'd you forget?
For the tenth time, Bolan, I just forgot, it happens.
That's lame. You should be penalized for that.
What's the big damn deal?
The big damn deal is, that's the way we play.
Yeah, that the way Uh-huh, uh-huh, we play it.
Front pocket.
What's that?
Left side.
Shirt pocket.
What are you talking about?
Empty the pocket.
Fuck you.
- Yo, Tepp. - Yo, Bolan. What?
Empty the pocket.
What's in the pocket? What's in the pocket?
- What's in the pocket? - Get away!
For cryin' out loud!
Guys, it's time to settle down, okay?
We're supposed to be having fun.
This isn't camp, Bolan.
I came here to play cards.
I am so sick and tired of screwing around.
Tepper, you're acting more Quigley than Quigley.
I am so sick of you guys bagging on me.
Why are you doing this? We know you got a ticket.
You guys are the biggest bunch of dicks.
- Oh, we're dicks. - Oh, we're dicks.
Like you never bought an extra ticket, right, Fish?
Extra tickets? What are you talking about?
You can buy a freakin' 100 extra tickets for all I care.
All you need is one. For here.
Well, I didn't have any time to buy extra ones.
All right? This one's...
this one's for Carla, for tonight.
Maybe he's got a winner.
Yeah. That's it.
That's it. I got a winner.
No, he doesn't have a winner.
If he had a winner, he wouldn't be here.
Wait a minute, you really think I do, don't you?
I just hope you're getting frequent flyer miles
'cause you're all over the freakin' map tonight, kid.
Call 'em if you do. Go ahead, call 'em.
I don't want this shit hanging over my head.
- For crying out loud. - Seriously, Fish. Call 'em up.
Fine, all right!
You want me to call 'em? Fine, I'll call 'em.
Forgive me for wanting to do something special for my girlfriend.
If I may.
When trust between friends is broken, it can never be repaired.
If you challenge him and you're wrong,
that could haunt this group forever.
Avery's right.
This is stupid. So freakin' ridiculous.
Sit the butt. Let's settle this.
The rule is, you don't look.
Ever. For any reason.
That's the rule and it's very simple. Quigley...
look me in the eye.
Did you check the numbers?
I never have.
Bolan?
I know the answer, but I have to ask.
No.
- Tepp? - No.
Avery?
I don't know you, but I'll trust you.
If you know the numbers, you can't be in the game.
- Do you know the numbers? - No.
Okay, then.
What about you?
No.
I never have and I never will.
Let's play Last Man Standing.
Avery, you get this, right?
You know you could lose your ticket?
Winner or not.
I think I understand the game.
No mistaking which is yours.
I'm sorry, guys.
I don't know what my problem is tonight.
I know what your problem is. You're scared.
And you ought to be.
Doing what you're doing.
It's risky.
No, it's only risky if you pick the wrong woman.
You haven't.
It's just marriage.
It doesn't mean forever.
One way or the other, it'll be over soon.
Not soon enough. Let's play some cards.
All right, Avery. It's a very simple game.
Five-card draw. I deal counterclockwise,
low man out on each hand.
Stay off the bottom and you stay alive.
That deck ever make its way around to me?
No, Fish always deals Last Man.
He doesn't trust anybody.
For some reason, we indulge him.
New rule: Anyone gets up for any reason, you're out.
All right? Agreed?
Hey, you guys,
does anybody smell that?
That's cat piss. Tepp, you need some Renuzit.
Uh-oh. Witch doctor's got a good hand.
What you got, witch doctor, huh? A pair?
Maybe two?
Why do you call me that?
You call me that every week. What's it mean?
You want to know?
Okay.
All right.
Seeing how everyone's coming clean, starting fresh,
I'm gonna let you in on a little secret,
all you guys... one of the reasons why I constantly kick your ass,
and you're gonna remember me come Christmas-time.
Quigley, every time you have a good hand,
you get so excited you start spinning things,
just like this, twisting it around.
Yeah. Dead give-away.
It's a tell. Tells me all I need to know.
Everyone's got one. You don't know you're doing it, you just do it.
Perfect example... Bolan.
Every time Bolan is bluffing, he starts
tapping his foot like he's got palsy or something.
Like he's screaming, "Look at me, I'm lying!"
I guarantee you he's got nothing, first one out, I bet you anything.
Tepper, on the other hand,
like a Russian novel.
Very hard to read.
Especially tonight. I need a Geiger counter for him.
Yeah, you don't show much. Haven't figured yours out. Yet.
What's yours?
Quigley, I just got done telling you, it's unconscious.
If I knew, I wouldn't do it.
That's why it's called a give-away.
Unbelievable. I hand you the keys to the kingdom
and you can't even walk through the freakin' door.
All right, big man Avery. How many do you want?
Three.
Three for the big man.
Witch doctor?
Quigley!
What you got, two pair? Going for that little full house?
- Just play. - Bolan?
One, two, three, four cards.
Thank you.
Tepp?
Don't need a tell to read that.
Man takes three, dealer takes three.
That stinks, I can't believe you guys don't smell that.
What you got, Ave? Turn 'em.
Oh, pair of sixes.
Not too strong, but strong enough to stay in the game, I'm betting.
Huh, Bolan? What you got, Quigley?
What's that right there?
Witch doctor, working the mojo.
Two pair. All you got to do is beat two sixes.
What you got, Bolan?
Oh. The queen.
Tepp, all you got to do is beat a queen to stay alive. And he does.
Pair of three's.
It's a tough way to start the game, huh, Bol?
What do you got?
Oh, let's see here. What do I have?
- There's one boy. - Here we go, starting early.
Oh! And there's another.
The pair of boys kicks the shit out of your bitch.
Bluffer holds true to form.
One down. Three to go.
See how it works?
Last man alive gets the pot.
All right that cat piss is killing me. I'm gonna open the window.
You're out.
Yes!
- What? - It works!
You're up, you're out.
No, no, no. It's you can't get up during a hand.
- Bye, bye. - Guys, it worked.
What? Bullshit. No, Bolan, it didn't work, okay?
That was a domestic thing. I was doing it for everybody.
No, Quigley. Check it out.
It didn't smell like cat piss. I just said it did.
I suggested it.
You should have been at that seminar, buddy.
What the fuck are you talking about? Come on!
- You guys are rough. - No kidding!
Look enough of this Mickey Mouse crap.
This coming from a guy who calls seven card no peekie.
Hey, guys. Can I get a little credit here?
I mean I think I should have been on "All My Children."
Come on, Tepp. Back me up here, huh?
It's called tough love.
Embrace it.
Whatever. I don't care anymore.
Yeah-huh.
That leave three of us.
All right. We got A: Old and wise.
B: Good looking and young.
And C: All of the above.
Let's just see what happens, shall we, boys?
Pow. How you feel about that one?
Bingo!
Yo, yo, yo. I got a little something-something in the window.
He's peeping again.
Bolan, please. Go suggest he jump.
Two girls. One's clothed.
One's in a bra, they're trying on clothes.
She is definitely 18.
Bolan, check that out.
No, thank you.
What's the matter with you?
They've got the window thing up. They want you to look.
How high up do you think we are?
How high are you?
You sure you don't want to take a look there, Fish?
A little coquette in the window just for you.
We are playing for six million bucks in here.
No time for high school peep shows.
Okay, we're down to panties now.
We're down to panties now.
And you can see right through them. Come on, Bolan.
Three stories up, straight across. I won't tell anyone.
- Give it a shot. - Maybe I'll spot the food guy.
Spot the food guy.
You know, I've always questioned the fascination with voyeurism.
Must be one's lack of... holy mother of God!
Oh, shit!
You knew! You knew! The one time I looked.
The one time.
Welcome to my seminar. Come here.
Avery, how many you want?
Two.
Ein, zwei.
How'd those feel, Avery? They feel sexy those cards?
Tepp.
- God. - Oh, Christ.
Oh, God.
You know what? Just go ahead, deal.
- No, go clean that thing up. - I'm not leaving the table.
I'll watch the tickets. Go clean that thing up.
For crying out loud, it's making me sick.
- You sure? - Yeah, I'm sure. Hurry. Go.
This means you're out.
It's worse than puberty in there. This kid's like a rabid dog.
Just going on what you said.
I think under the given circumstances...
Right. Sort of like a home court advantage, I guess.
- You can call it that. - Hold up.
Avery, you want the tickets that bad,
just take 'em.
Oh, no wait. Hold on a second. Clip the lip.
First of all, I'm still in this game.
Second of all, no one's out. I said he could go.
You the king? I didn't agree to anything.
Maybe it's because you don't have a vote.
Fish...
I got a ticket in that pot and I figure I got a vote.
You figure wrong, old man.
'Cause you're an outsider and you're outnumbered.
So don't come to my game and tell me how it's played.
Back off!
You're out. He's up, he's out.
- He's not out. - Whatever. If I'm out, he's out.
Fuck that. You're out too.
He's not out. I told him he could get up.
When did you become a pit boss?
Fishman, how can you do this? Every single time you change the rules.
You're not the boss.
- I've had it... - Guys, guys!
You know what we do when the kids can't get along?
- We end the game. - Hey, hey! Bolan!
- Relax. - Don't panic.
Then stop your freakin' whining. You're worse than my kids.
Now, I'll be the arbiter.
Okay?
That's fine.
What I say goes.
No arguing, no debating.
- Just ca... - Just shut up for once!
Avery...
are you going to be okay with my call?
Sure.
He's not out.
He's not out. Meaning he's still in.
So. I'm in. Right?
Yes. You're in.
Oh, this is fun.
Do you have to say that every five minutes?
What?
For crying out loud. You say it every other sentence.
- So what? - So, it's annoying.
- So, grow up. - You're an ass, Fishman.
And you can moonwalk back to fuckland.
Having fun yet, Avery?
It must be great having kids, huh?
Kids are wonderful.
First time around...
it was great.
Now that I got the grand-daughters,
light of my life.
I'd do anything for my girls.
I bet you would.
You know, all day,
I'm at camp, working with my kids, but...
but I don't have any of my own. Yet.
I got all these people telling me that
I'm not ready.
But I feel like you're only not ready
if you haven't lived enough life for yourself.
I have.
I want 'em.
My wife and I are having
a little trouble getting pregnant.
I was at this clinic today.
And this nurse puts me in this little room
and gives me...
a big butt magazine.
So I do my thing,
and when I'm done, I peep my head out
and l...
what do I do with this container?
This nurse says, "Leave it on the shelf."
I'm sorry?
I mean, my self-esteem is at an all-time low.
I'm in a little green closet with big butt magazine,
suspecting that my semen isn't potent.
And you want me to leave it on the shelf?
So I left it on the shelf.
What'd you do with the magazine?
What's he doing in there?
(knocking)
Uh, yeah?
Hey, how can you stand Fishman?
He's ridiculous.
- D'you mind? I gotta whiz. - Sure, go ahead.
Fishman!
Tepp. I literally can't do this with you standing behind me.
There he is. About time.
Avery and I made up. BFF. Best friends forever.
Sit it.
We'll play some cards.
(music plays)
That's disgusting.
What do you guys suppose the chances are
that one of these is a winner?
One in 900 million.
Sh-h.
Tepp, I'm gonna use your phone. I'm gonna call my daughter.
I've got one of those calling cards.
All right, Tepp. How many you want?
- Three. - Three.
Dealer takes three.
That's right, Avery. I'm coming to get ya.
All right.
Let's turn 'em, boys. Avery, what you got?
Oh. That's not bad.
That's not bad for a fireman hero
turned bus driver with two outstanding warrants.
A, B, C. Tepp, your turn.
Roll 'em or show 'em.
Tepper? Roll 'em or show 'em. Let's do it.
Aw! Bitch!
I get my daughter her own phone line so I can talk to her once in a while,
her mother takes it off the hook every night.
Nice, huh?
Fantastic. Tepp!
Stop with the drama. Roll your cards, please.
Tonight would be fantastic.
I will.
Am I missing something?
All right, I'll tell you what, I'll make it easy on you, Tepper.
See you start with a pair of threes.
Then you go right in
to the pair of eights.
Bang, bang, boom.
Come on, Tepp. Can you do it?
Well,
I think I can.
Fish.
Oh. I think he's pulling a Fishman.
I believe I have
these two aces, Fish.
And... oh, what's this?
What's happening?
Oh, and a third one.
What'd you have? Two and draw one?
Yeah, something like that. I got lucky.
Something I never have been.
Unbelievable. I lose with two freakin' pair?
I can't buy a freakin' break. Where's the phone?
I gotta cancel a bet.
I'll deal.
Yeah, let Houdini deal. I gotta get a plan.
- Now there's a surprise. - What'd you say?
Nothing. I'm gonna deal.
Damn. Feels like a deck and a half in here.
What do you say we use a new deck for the last hand?
Tell him Paul Fishman's on the line.
Yes, I'll hold.
You know, the funny thing about lottery tickets,
it's such a leap of faith.
I've been playing the lottery for 10 years now,
one ticket every week for 10 years.
And I always play the same numbers.
I'd sooner forget my birthday as my lottery numbers.
And I always buy them
from the same little Korean fellow.
He's got a place right across the street from our church.
Every Sunday, after I thank the Lord for my blessings,
I sneak in a little prayer for myself.
And I say, "Dear Lord, this week let me win."
Then I take the girls across the street,
and buy them juice from the little Korean fellow,
and buy me a lottery ticket.
The odd thing about this Sunday,
the little fellow wasn't there.
Sick or something.
First time in 10 years.
But I buy the ticket anyway from his wife.
Same numbers, different hand
punching them into the computer.
And I say to myself,
Is this a sign?
Could this be the week I'm going to win?
Maybe the good Lord knew
I needed a different hand typing in the tickets.
So he made the little guy sick,
just so I could win.
Then I go and lose the ticket.
And you find it.
And here you are gambling it in a poker game.
Now here's where the faith comes in.
If the good Lord intended me to win,
and mine is the winning ticket, I'm walking out of here with it.
Because, He wouldn't do that,
play a trick on me like that.
Because he's too busy screwing with me. Deal, Quigley.
You listen to me, you little rat bastard.
You tell him Fishman's calling back in two minutes
and he better pick up the phone.
That's unbelievable.
I have the only bookie in New York with a freakin' receptionist.
Hands on the table, fellas.
I don't want any controversy.
Hey, guys. You think we'll still be playing poker in 50 years?
God, I hope not.
And take your time.
Six million reasons not to screw this up.
(music plays)
I think we should split it if someone wins.
- Since when? - I've always thought that.
Especially after everything that's gone on tonight.
Then why even play?
I don't know, Fish. For the fun of it.
What is it with fun tonight? This isn't supposed to be fun.
This is gambling. There's winners and there's losers.
Yes, I'll hold.
How many, Ave? One for Ave.
Hi, Mrs. Darmstetter.
Tepp? How many?
Well, sure you can, you've done it for me before.
Honey...
What?
Do you think they'd know to check the basement?
- How many, Tepp? - The police.
Draw time. Let's go. How many?
Tepp. Mrs. Darmstetter.
I don't know. I'm sure they do.
Are you telling me all the money I bet, you can't do me this one thing?
- Remember the exterminator? - Come on. How many?
- He didn't know. - Tepp, pay attention.
- He's worked this building for years. - Pissing me off, this guy.
If he didn't know, how are they gonna know?
- Unbelievable. - Draw, Tepp, how many?
I don't know, but they know, okay?
How many?
- Hello? - I want to double my bet.
I want six bills on SC tomorrow, do you understand me?
- Maybe you should say something. - I want you to count 'em out for me.
- She's trying to talk to you. - I'd say something,
but they're not going to listen to me, an old lady.
- Where are you? - Bitch.
- Tepp, Tepp. - Tepper.
- Pissing me off this guy. - The exterminator.
Tepp. Where's your head?
Maybe if you said something?
Would you put a fucking sock in it!?
I'm sorry.
Mrs. Darmstetter, I'm sorry. I didn't mean that.
Oh God, I didn't mean that.
I'm having a rough night here.
I would never hurt you.
I would never ever hurt you, I'm so sorry.
You know that, right? You believe me, right?
This isn't about you. What happened just now is not about you.
You scared me.
I know I did.
I've never seen you like this.
Yeah.
Yeah, me neither.
Could you please forgive me?
I forgive you.
You want to stay here and watch some TV?
No, I guess I better get back,
in case somebody calls.
Are you sure you're all right?
I'm okay.
Good night.
I dealt you already.
Ave?
(whistling)
Tepp?
I got nothing.
You got a flush.
Hey!
You don't draw a three for a flush in a two-man game. That's idiotic.
You don't deserve to win.
You don't draw a three for a flush ever.
I mean the chance of that happening are like zero.
Unbelievable. Quigley, get out of my seat.
Tepp, take your tickets.
Why don't you ever play like that when my money's on the freakin' table?
Take your tickets, Tepp. Here you go. I'm gonna check the numbers.
- I'll do it. - That's okay, I got it.
Quigley, give me the phone now.
It's ringing.
Still want to split it?
Tonight's Big Three jackpot is worth $6 million.
The winning numbers are: 10,
23,
91.
To hear the numbers again, press one.
No winners.
Hey, thank God for that.
(knocking)
Oh, you've got to be kidding me.
Will you get the door, Bolan?
All right, turns out you guys are not
the biggest idiots in the building.
Raymond got himself stuck in the garbage chute,
ass end up.
I live off 229th. I'm gonna keep and eye out for you.
Now you can leave.
Thank you, Officer Campbell.
Finally, we can play some freakin' cards.
Too late, Tepp. No take backs.
What's done is done.
- What are you doing? - I'm going home.
Well, no. It's still early yet.
Not for me.
- Bolan! - Yeah, guys. I gotta call it too.
What, are you kidding me?
We've only played one freakin' hand all night.
Well, we can go again tomorrow night.
I can't play tomorrow. Tonight's my poker night.
Hey, guys, I'm cabbing it. Anybody wanna share?
I'm so tired of humping this freakin' ride.
Guess it wasn't in the cards today, huh, Fish?
And the sun just set on another day you gave head to, Quigley.
But what does that do for me? Huh?
Avery, it was nice to meet you.
- Guys. - Later, Bolan.
Hey, you want your cash?
I guess that's for me.
You probably want to get going too, huh, Avery?
Let me... let me get your jacket and stuff.
No need to rush off just yet.
God, I thought they'd never leave.
Sorry, Tepp, this had to happen.
Did you see that? Did you see how smooth I was?
Three clubs right off the bottom. Like butter, I'm smooth.
Avery, I'm going to get a towel.
No, you didn't catch that because I'm Kreskin, mother-fucker.
What the fuck?
It's okay, it's okay.
We got an emergency, 411 West 13th, apartment 7.
Tepp, Tepp, hey, hey, no, no.
- That doesn't work! - Get away!
We got $6 million, God damn it!
We got a winner here. I'm protecting our money.
Tepp, our money. We've got a winning ticket.
- You said no winners, Tepp. - He lied. He had to.
- And Bolan would never go for it. - Why are you doing this, Quigley?
Because it's his ticket. And he can prove it.
- What are you talking about? - Because Fireman Frank here
plays his grand-daughter's birthday.
But neither one of you caught that did you?
I did.
I did. Quigley did.
Show him the ticket, Tepp. Show him the ticket.
First number: 10. Month: October.
Second number: 23, day. Last number: 91, year.
October, 23, 1991. He plays his grand-daughter's birthday,
and he's been doing it for 10 years.
And don't you think for a fucking second
that all his neighbors in the hood don't know about it,
probably planning a big ol' barbeque right about now.
We got no choice, we got no choice here.
Think about it, think about it. Four white boys.
Four white boys rip off a...
a Black man.
A hero no less. We're fucked.
At the very least we have Al Sharpton up our ass for the rest of our lives.
Plus, this is the kind of guy who doesn't even quit his job.
Screw that.
Screw that.
I'm quitting.
I'm getting my daughter back.
You're getting those guys off your ass, and Tepp, you can do whatever you want.
Oh, God.
It's him or us. I'll do it. I'll do it.
- Stop it. - Stop what?
- This was your idea. - Please.
(intercom buzzes)
- You guys, shut up. - Stop it.
Carla: Hey, hey. It's me.
Let me in, baby. I'm drenched.
I wanted to look so good for you, too.
Can I tell you something? I am really nervous.
I know it probably sounds silly, but...
I don't know. It's like our first date all over again.
You're going to have to let me in. My key is jammed again.
Tepp. Don't bring Carla up here.
It's not a good place for her. Not now.
What are you doing up there? I am freezing.
Let's go, let's go. Let me in.
Help me with him.
If it's about the guys, I don't care if they're still there.
I'm sure they know everything that's going on anyway.
I'm trying real hard to give you the benefit of the doubt right now.
Come on, I've waited six months for tonight.
Tepp, if you have something to say to me, then just say it.
Don't leave me standing out here.
You know what the problem is?
You never chose me.
I asked you out.
I kissed you first.
I wanted to get married.
You never once took the initiative with anything.
You just let it happen.
Now you're doing it again, aren't you?
Well, I'm tired of waiting.
I'm tired of spending every moment trying to figure out
what it is you want and how I can be that.
I'm just tired.
We'll straighten it all out tomorrow, all right?
I promise you we'll straighten it out tomorrow.
No we won't.
Fish, you won't be straightening it out tomorrow.
What are we doing, man?
We're friends, Fish. What are we doing?
Oh, come on.
You're friends.
Since when do friends cheat each other?
Yep. I caught that too, Tepp.
And since you're feeling all righteous then why don't you tell Fish?
Tell Fish just how good a friend you are.
See, Tepp. I figured out your tell.
When you're lying, you look him straight in the eye.
Yep.
He cheated you, Fish.
He looked you straight in the eye and he cheated you. Three aces?
Three aces, my ass.
You cheated me, Tepp?
I did.
I'm sorry, Fish.
You dumb-asses.
30 years I've been waiting for a break like this, you screw it up in a night.
It's what the wall was all about?
Jesus, Tepp.
And Quigley, you smashed his head 'cause he's a threat to you?
Did you listen to a word he said all night?
He's got a wife and kids, man.
We know where he lives. You don't have to hurt a guy like that.
Now...
you know, now, it's a problem.
Avery.
You're a problem.
Not if we split it.
Look, I'm a poor man today.
Tomorrow, I'll be a millionaire.
Either way.
Just want a fair share.
You see, Quigley, there's a man who's thinking.
He's living in the moment. Half his head is freakin' gone,
and he's smarter than all three of us put together.
Avery.
I don't want to threaten you.
I know what that feels like.
But if we do this,
and you turn on us...
I don't want anybody else hurt.
Right.
- I got no problem with that. - I'm good with that too.
No.
We're not splitting it.
What?
10 minutes ago,
you were Johnny-split-it-all.
What are you, the Moral Majority now? What, am I in the freakin' 700 Club?
We're splitting it, Tepp.
It's his.
It was his to begin with.
No, Tepp. You found the wallet.
That ticket became yours, and then you bet it in a game.
- We're splitting it. - We're splitting it, Tepper.
And you damn well ought to be happy about it, seeing as how you cheated me.
Don't complicate this, Tepper, please.
Just don't complicate it. This is the best way to do it.
We've all got something on each other.
No one's going to talk, it would only hurt us all.
I'm going to take the ticket, I'll cash it out, I'll divvy it up.
See, I can handle that.
We're not splitting it.
It's his and he's leaving with it.
No, what is this? What is this, Tepper, huh?
Come on. This is about... you feel guilty, Tepp?
'Cause if you feel guilty, give us the ticket.
Give us the ticket, Tepp.
I'm doing this 'cause it needs doing.
Take your ticket, Avery.
I appreciate the gesture, but...
it just doesn't seem decided yet.
It's not that simple, is it?
(knocking)
Campbell: Guess who?
Tick, tick. Open the door.
(knocking)
I was two blocks away from getting clocked out.
I should have run the light.
What did I tell you, Tepp? Officer, I'm sorry.
This is a little embarrassing. I'm the one who called, actually.
L... I panicked.
What happened to you?
Like he said. He panicked.
We were rough-housing and
I took a header, and the little shit panics.
- Yeah, I thought he was hurt. - He just panicked.
So he said.
I've grown tired of you guys.
I'm the one who called 911.
Well, I'm all out of gold stars. Work it out with your buddies.
Well, that's 'cause I've done something illegal.
And I want to confess.
I'm sorry, Fish.
You wise guys...
I'm finishing a double shift
at the end of a very long week.
I've got daughters home from school waiting to spend time with their dad.
You are cutting into my quality time and I do not appreciate it.
This ticket...
belongs to Avery.
Not me.
And not us.
Well then, I suggest you give it to him.
The problem is,
it's a winner.
It's worth $6 million.
If I give this to you,
will you see that Avery gets home safely with it?
Courtesy, professionalism and respect.
That's me.
Nice.
This your ticket?
Yes, sir.
Does that mean it's stolen property?
Look, I just want what's fair.
There's no problem.
Oh, but there is a problem.
See, I wanted to get out of here.
I wanted you guys to settle this thing on your own,
on account I've got family at home.
But like a boil on my ass,
you guys just wouldn't go away.
So, whether you want to press charges or not,
I have all the paperwork to do. Procedure, I'm sure you know about that.
I'll do it Monday morning.
You'll find it in lost property with your name on it, Avery.
Yeah, and I'm 10 inches.
Are you bragging,
or are you doubting my word?
Yeah, just another dirty cop, huh?
Maybe you're right.
Paperwork does have a way of getting misplaced.
You girls have a nice night.
Tepper,
please tell me you just pulled a fast one.
And we're about to work this out
like men.
Right?
You didn't just give a New York City cop
a six million dollar lottery ticket, right?
Right?
I did the right thing, Fish.
You did.
Oh, for crying out loud.
You did.
Congratulations, Tepp.
You just got code.
I just wish it could have been tomorrow.
Nice knowing you, Avery.
Call her.
I appreciate what you tried to do.
You did the right thing.
What?
Oh-h!
Son of a...
There's no mistaking my ticket, is there?
Son of it!
Go home to your wife, okay, Avery?
What's this?
Hey, oh!
Oh, God.
CD: This is big brother Bolan
sending the good love out to my two favorite people.
(music plays)
Hey, it's Carla. Leave a message and I'll call you back.
Hey, it's me.
I love you.
And I hope it's not too little too late.
I love you.
(knocking)
How you doing?
You called my brother-in-law Victor about my wallet.
I'm Avery Phillips.
I can't hide
I can't deny
The way you change, change my life
Like an angel full of love
You bring me home, oh you bring me love
I was lonely
Till you showed me
You made me feel pain I've never felt before
I was broken
Took my weakness
Made me feel secure
Every time I needed you
You were always there
When I didn't feel like giving love
Ooh, I didn't have a prayer
I want to show you how much
You mean to me
No, I can't sleep, no, I can't eat
No, I can't think without you
- Yeah! - Baby, don't you know
I can't live without you?
Oh, in my life
Yeah
What would I do without you?
Face 2004
Facing Window 2003
Fahrenheit 451 (1966)
Fahrenheit 911 CD1
Fahrenheit 911 CD2
Fail Safe
Failan CD1
Failan CD2
Fallen
Fallen Angels 1995
Falls The CD1
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Fame
Family Guy 01x01 - Death Has a Shadow
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Family Guy 01x08 - Peter Peter Caviar Eater
Family Guy 01x09 - Running Mates
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Family Guy 01x12 - Love Thy Trophy
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Far From Heaven
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Farewell Home sweet Home (Otar Iosseliani 1999)
Fargo - 1996 CD1 25fps
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Farscape - 1x01 - Premiere
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Farscape - 1x05 - Back and Back and Back to the Future
Farscape - 1x06 - Thank God Its Friday Again
Farscape - 1x07 - PK Tech Girl
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Farscape - 1x11 - Till the Blood Runs Clear
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Farscape - 1x15 - Durka Returns
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Farscape - 1x19 - Nerve
Farscape - 1x20 - The Hidden Memory
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Farscape - 2x13 - Look At The Princess III - The Maltese Crichton
Farscape - 2x14 - Beware Of Dog
Farscape - 2x15 - Wont Get Fooled Again
Farscape - 2x16 - The Locket
Farscape - 2x17 - The Ugly Truth
Farscape - 2x18 - A Clockwork Nebari
Farscape - 2x19 - Liars Guns and Money I - A Not So Simple Plan
Farscape - 2x20 - Liars Guns and Money II - With Friends Like These
Farscape - 2x21 - Liars Guns and Money III - Plan B
Farscape - 2x22 - Die Me Dichotomy
Farscape - 3x01 - Season Of Death
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Farscape - 3x05 - Different Destinations
Farscape - 3x06 - Eat Me
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Farscape - 3x08 - Green Eyed Monster
Farscape - 3x09 - Losing Time
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Farscape - 3x14 - Infinite Possibilities I - Daedalus Demands
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Farscape - 3x16 - Revenging Angel
Farscape - 3x17 - The Choice
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Farscape - 3x20 - Into The Lions Den I - Lambs To The Slaugher
Farscape - 3x21 - Into The Lions Den II - Wolf In Sheeps Clothing
Farscape - 3x22 - Dog With Two Bones
Farscape - 4x01 - Crichton Kicks
Farscape - 4x02 - What Was Lost (Part 1) - Sacrifice
Farscape - 4x03 - What Was Lost (Part 2) - Resurrection
Farscape - 4x04 - Lavas A Many Splendored Thing
Farscape - 4x05 - Promises
Farscape - 4x06 - Natural Election
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Farscape - 4x11 - Unrealized Reality (Part 1)
Farscape - 4x12 - Kansas (Part 2)
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Farscape - 4x14 - Twice Shy
Farscape - 4x15 - Mental As Anything
Farscape - 4x16 - Bringing Home The Beacon
Farscape - 4x17 - A Constellation Of Doubt
Farscape - 4x18 - Prayer
Farscape - 4x19 - We are So Screwed - Fetal Attraction (Part 1)
Farscape - 4x20 - We are So Screwed - Hot To Katratzi (Part 2)
Farscape - 4x21 - We are So Screwed - La Bomba (Part 3)
Farscape - 4x22 - Bad Timing
Farscape - The Peacekeeper Wars (Part 1)
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Fast And Furious
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Father of a Soldier (Rezo Chkheidze 1964)
Father of the Bride
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Film That Was Never Made A
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Firefly 1x06 - Jaynestown
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Foreigner The
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Frankenfish 2004
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Frasier 01x01 - The Good Son
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Frasier 01x12 - Miracle On Third Or Fourth Street
Frasier 02x01 - Slow Tango in South Seattle
Frasier 02x02 - The Unkindest Cut of All
Frasier 02x03 - Commentary by Director David Lee and Writer Joe Keenan
Frasier 02x03 - The Matchmaker
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Frasier 02x05 - Dukes We Hardly Knew You
Frasier 02x06 - The Botched Language of Cranes
Frasier 02x07 - The Candidate
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Frasier 02x23 - The Innkeepers
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Friends - 4x03 - The One With the Cuffs
Friends - 4x04 - The One With the Ballroom Dancing
Friends - 4x05 - The One With Joeys New Girlfriend
Friends - 4x06 - The One With the Dirty Girl
Friends - 4x07 - The One Where Chandler Crosses
Friends - 4x08 - The One With Chandler in a Box
Friends - 4x09 - The One Where They are Going
Friends - 4x10 - The One With the Girl from
Friends - 4x11 - The One With Phoebes Uterus
Friends - 4x12 - The One With the Embryos
Friends - 4x13 - The One With Rachels Crush
Friends - 4x14 - The One With Joeys Dirty Day
Friends - 4x15 - The One With All the Rugby
Friends - 4x16 - The One With the Fake Party
Friends - 4x17 - The One With the Free Porn
Friends - 4x18 - The One With Rachels New Dress
Friends - 4x19 - The One With All the Haste
Friends - 4x20 - The One With All the Wedding Dresses
Friends - 4x21 - The One With the Invitation
Friends - 4x22 - The One With the Worst Best Man Ever
Friends - 4x23 - The One With Rosss Wedding - part 1
Friends - 4x24 - The One With Rosss Wedding - part 2
Friends - 5x01 - The One After Ross Says Rachel
Friends - 5x02 - The One With All the Kissing
Friends - 5x03 - The One Hundreth
Friends - 5x04 - The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS
Friends - 5x05 - The One With the Kips
Friends - 5x06 - The One With the Yeti
Friends - 5x07 - The One Where Ross Moves In
Friends - 5x08 - The One With All the Thanksgivins
Friends - 5x09 - The One With Rosss Sandwich
Friends - 5x10 - The One With the Inappropiate Sister
Friends - 5x11 - The One With All the Resolutions
Friends - 5x12 - The One With Chandlers Work Laugh
Friends - 5x13 - The One With Joeys Bag
Friends - 5x14 - The One Where Everyone Finds Out
Friends - 5x15 - The One With the Girl Who Hits Joey
Friends - 5x16 - The One With the Cop
Friends - 5x17 - The One With Rachels
Friends - 5x18 - The One Where Rachel Smokes
Friends - 5x19 - The One Where Ross Cant Flirt
Friends - 5x20 - The One With the Ride-Along
Friends - 5x21 - The One With the Ball
Friends - 5x22 - The One With Joeys Big Break
Friends - 5x23 - The One in Vegas
Friends - 6x01 - The One After Vegas
Friends - 6x02 - The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel
Friends - 6x03 - The One With Rosss Denial
Friends - 6x04 - The One Where Joey Loses His
Friends - 6x05 - The One With Joeys Porsche
Friends - 6x06 - The One On the Last Night
Friends - 6x07 - The One Where Phoebe Runs
Friends - 6x08 - The One With Rosss Teeth
Friends - 6x15
Friends 7x01 - The One with Monicas Thunder
Friends 7x02 - The One With Rachels Book
Friends 7x03 - The One With Phoebes Cookies
Friends 7x04 - The One With Rachels Assistant
Friends 7x05 - The One With The Engagement Picture
Friends 7x06 - The One With The Nap Partners
Friends 7x07 - The One with Rosss Library Book
Friends 7x08 - The One Where Chandler Doesnt Like Dogs
Friends 7x09 - The One With All the Candy
Friends 7x10 - The One With The Holiday Armadillo
Friends 7x11 - The One With All The Cheesecakes
Friends 7x12 - The One Where They are Up All Night
Friends 7x13 - The One Where Rosita Dies
Friends 7x14 - The One Where They All Turn Thirty
Friends 7x15 - The One With Joeys New Brain
Friends 7x16 - The One With the Truth About London
Friends 7x17 - The One With the Cheap Wedding Dress
Friends 7x18 - The One With Joeys Award
Friends 7x19 - The One With Ross and Monicas Cousin
Friends 7x20 - The One With Rachels Kisses
Friends 7x21 - The One With the Vows
Friends 7x22 - The One With Chandlers Dad
Friends 7x23 - The One With Monica and Chandlers Wedding Part 1
Friends 7x24 - The One With Monica and Chandlers Wedding Part 2
Friends 9x01 - The One Where No One Proposes
Friends 9x02 - The One Where Emma Cries
Friends 9x03 - The One With The Pediatrician
Friends 9x04 - The One With The Sharks
Friends 9x05 - The One With Phoebes Birthday Dinner
Friends 9x06 - The One With The Male Nanny
Friends 9x07 - The One With Rosss Inappropriate Song
Friends 9x08 - The One With Rachels Other Sister
Friends 9x09 - The One With Rachels Phone Number
Friends 9x10 - The One With Christmas In Tulsa
Friends 9x11 - The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work
Friends 9x12 - The One With Phoebes Rats
Friends 9x13 - The One Where Monica Sings
Friends 9x14 - The One With The Blind Dates
Friends 9x15 - The One With The Mugging
Friends 9x16 - The One With The Boob Job
Friends 9x17 - The One With The Memorial Service
Friends 9x18 - The One With The Lottery
Friends 9x19 - The One With Rachels Dream
Friends 9x20 - The One With The Soap Opera Party
Friends 9x21 - The One With The Fertility Test
Friends 9x22 - The One With The Donor
Friends 9x23-24 - The One In Barbados 1 2)
Frisson des vampires Le
From Beijing with love
From Dusk Till Dawn
From Dusk Till Dawn 3 The Hangmans Daughter
From Hell
From Justin To Kelly (Special Edition)
Frontera La
Frusta e il corpo La
Fucking Amal
Fudoh The New Generation 1996
Fugitive The - The Chase Continues
Fugitives (2000)
Fukssvansen (Chop Chop)
Full Frontal 2002
Full Metal Jacket
Full Time Killer
Fun Movie (2002 Korean) CD1
Fun Movie (2002 Korean) CD2
Fun in Acapulco (Richard Thorpe 1963)
Funeral Parade of Roses
Funeral in Berlin
Funny Girl
Fuochi dArtifizio
Furia (2002)
Fury The (1978)
Futurama 1x01 - Space Pilot 3000
Futurama 1x02 - The Series Has Landed
Futurama 1x03 - I Roommate
Futurama 1x04 - Loves Labors Lost in Space
Futurama 1x05 - Fear of a Bot Planet
Futurama 1x06 - A Fishful of Dollars
Futurama 1x07 - My Three Suns
Futurama 1x08 - A Big Piece of Garbage
Futurama 1x09 - Hell is Other Robots
Futurama 2x01 - A Flight to Remember
Futurama 2x02 - Mars University
Futurama 2x03 - When Aliens Attack
Futurama 2x04 - Fry and the Slurm Factory
Futurama 3x01 - Amazon Women in the Mood
Futurama 3x02 - Parasites Lost
Futurama 3x03 - A Tale of Two Santas
Futurama 3x04 - The Luck of the Fryrish
Futurama 3x05 - The Birdbot of Ice-catraz
Futurama 3x06 - Bendless Love
Futurama 3x07 - The Day the Earth Stood Stupid
Futurama 3x08 - Thats Lobstertainment
Futurama 3x09 - The Cyber House Rules
Futurama 3x10 - Insane in the Mainframe
Futurama 3x10 - Where The Buggalo Roam
Futurama 3x12 - The Route of All Evil
Futurama 3x13 - Bendin in the Wind
Futurama 3x14 - Time Keeps on Slippin
Futurama 3x15 - I Dated a Robot
Futurama 3x16 - A Leela of Her Own
Futurama 3x17 - A Pharaoh To Remember
Futurama 3x18 - Anthology of Interest Part 2
Futurama 3x19 - Roswell That Ends Well
Futurama 3x20 - Godfellas
Futurama 3x21 - Future Stock
Futurama 3x22 - The 30 Iron Chef
Futurama 4x01 - Kif Gets Knocked Up a Notch
Futurama 4x02 - Leelas Homeworld
Futurama 4x03 - Love and Rocket
Futurama 4x04 - Less Than Hero
Futurama 4x05 - A Taste of Freedom
Futurama 4x06 - Bender Should Not Be Allowed on TV
Futurama 4x07 - Jurassic Bark
Futurama 4x08 - Crimes of the Hot
Futurama 4x09 - Teenage Mutant Leelas Hurdles
Futurama 4x10 - The Why of Fry
Futurama 4x11 - Where no Fan Has Gone Before
Futurama 4x12 - The Sting
Futurama 4x13 - Bend Her
Futurama 4x14 - Obsoletely Fabulous
Futurama 4x15 - The Farnsworth Parabox
Futurama 4x16 - Three Hundred Big Boys
Futurama 4x17 - Spanish Fry
Futurama 4x18 - The Devils Hands are Idle Playthings
Fyra Nyanser Av Brunt CD1
Fyra Nyanser Av Brunt CD2