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Friends - 3x24 - The One With Ultimate Fighting Champ

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Ripped with SubRip 1.17 and Verified by CdinT|cdint@hotmail.com
I deliver perfection...|and don't brag about it! :D
Do you think there's a town|in Missouri or someplace...
...called Sample?
And as you're driving into the town,|there's a sign and it says:
"You're in Sample."
- How did it go with Pete?|- Tell us.
You're not gonna believe this.|So I go...
I'm sorry. Excuse us.
- It's a little crowded. Do you mind?|- Could you skooch?
Move over just a little bit.
Keep on skooching.
So, guys, listen.|I go over there and, you know, I'm...
Why? What is wrong with me?
- What's the matter?|- Tim...
...I have a feeling...
...my wife is sleeping|with her gynecologist.
How do you know?
- He's got access.|- I know.
It's a feeling you get.
Like when you're in|somebody else's bowling shoes?
That's the one.
- So you went to Pete's.|- What happened?
Why is this happening to me?
Maybe it's my wound.
Forget it.
It's not healed yet?
It's oozing!
Would you pass the cream?|There's the cream.
Thank you very much.
Tomas, this is gonna be hard,|but I wanted it to come from me.
- What is it?|- I've been sleeping with your wife.
You're the gynecologist?
I'm trying to have|a private conversation.
Can I have a napkin?|Could you please hand me a napkin?
Just give me the thing, all right?
Enough!
And you are no longer my friend!
We are finished! "Nada!" No more!
You are a bastard for doing that!
Stay away from me!
Come back!
So what were you gonna tell us?
I have no idea.
The One With|the Ultimate Fighting Champion
English Subtitles by|GELULA & CO., INC.
What was the big news|Pete wanted to tell you?
Or should I say, "Mrs. Monica Becker"?
Oh, keep your name.|Don't take his name.
He didn't ask me to marry him.
Then definitely don't take his name!
He wanted to tell me he's going|to compete in some Ultimate...
...Fighting Competition thingy.
- Pete?|- Why? What is it?
I don't know exactly.|It's sort of like wrestling.
But without the costumes.
And it's not fake.|It's totally brutal.
It's two guys in the ring and|the rules are, "There are no rules"!
You can bite and pull|people's hair and stuff?
Anything goes except eye-gouging|and fish-hooking.
- What's fish-hooking?|- What's fish-hook...
Thanks. That would have been|hard to describe.
What is that taste?
My hands are totally clean.|I just gave the duck a bath.
{y:i}Thanks for the warm welcome.
It's good to have you guys on my team.|I come to play. I hope you do too.
Let's go out there and get them!|And remember:
There is no "i" in "team".
Yes, but there's two in "martini".|So, everybody, back to my office.
You! Chuckles. What's your name?
It's Bing, sir.|I'm sorry. I was just...
No, no. I heard what you said.|Funny. I like funny.
This team's about hard work,|but it's also about having fun.
Good to have you aboard, Bing!
That's right. Ryder.
Winona Ryder for six.
Thank you.
Yeah. We have the reservations.
All right, buddy! Way to go!
Dude, what are you doing?
Thank you. My boss keeps slapping my|butt, and acting like it's no big deal.
What'd you do about it?
I didn't do anything.|I didn't want to be the guy...
...who has a problem with his boss|slapping his bottom.
I gotta tell you, I think it's okay|to be that guy.
Maybe it's that jock thing.
You know, how football players|pat each other after touchdowns.
You know, I don't understand guys.
I mean, I would never congratulate|Monica on a great stew...
...by, you know, grabbing her boob.
I know. For a really great stew,|you'd just...
...stick your head in between them.
Can we please go eat?
- Yeah, what are we getting?|- Anything but stew.
So from now on, don't give|your boss a chance to get you.
Don't turn your back to him.
Or you could teach him|a lesson, you know?
What you do is rub something that|smells really bad on your butt, right?
Then, when he goes to smack you,|his hand will smell.
Now, what could you rub on your butt|that would smell bad?
What if Joey was President?
Can I ask you something?
Okay, you can totally say no...
...but would it be okay with you|if I set Ross up on a date?
With who?
My friend Bonnie.|She always thought Ross was cute...
...and she asked if I could set it up.
- But if that's not cool...|- Which one is Bonnie?
You remember her from|my birthday party?
Average height...
...medium build, bald...
That's fine.
Great! Okay! Good for you!|All right!
You are iron! You are steel!
Let me ask you, how come when I call|your computer support line...
...I have to wait an hour and a half?
We're adding operators all the time.|Could we concentrate on my training?
It's just hard when I know|I have e-mail I can't get.
Hi, honey.
On the table. On the table, please.
So listen, my friends were|telling me a little bit about...
...this Ultimate Fighting thing.
It sounds really dangerous.
I don't want you to get hurt|because I kind of like you.
I don't want to get hurt either.|I'm being smart about this.
See these guys? They're|the best trainers in the world.
And Hoshi here used to be|a paid assassin.
A house painter!|He used to be a house painter!
- Promise me you'll be careful.|- I promise.
Are we still on for tonight?|Good. Because...
...maybe we could have|a little workout of our own.
No boom-boom before big fight!
How about just a boom?
That was depressing.|I just bought a pretzel...
...from one of the kids from "Fame".
Ready to go to the movies?|Oh, this is Bonnie!
This is Bonnie?
This is Bonnie? You're Bonnie?
I can show you an I.D. If you want.
Oh, no. You look a lot different|than the last time I saw you.
Oh, yeah. Well, I just|started wearing bras again.
Oh, that must be it.
Have fun tonight.
Thanks. You too.
You said she was bald.
She was bald. She's not now.
How could you not tell me|she has hair?
I don't know.|I hardly ever say that about people.
Oh, well this is just perfect!
Well, I'm sorry.|I thought you said it was okay.
I said it was okay when I thought|she was some weird bald chick.
That girl has got hair|all over her head!
- Maybe Ross won't like her personality.|- Does she have a bad personality?
Oh, no, Bonnie's the best!
Bing!
Read your CompuTek proposal.|Real home run.
Barely got you that time.|Get over here!
Come on.
Oh, yeah! Good one.
That was a good one.|Keep at it, team!
- What is with him?|- "With him"?
You're his favorite.|You're his guy!
We never get smacked.
That's not true.|He smacked you once.
Not on purpose.|He ricocheted off you and got me.
I'm telling you,|I need some smacks.
I got a kid starting Dartmouth.
Dartmouth? Who went to Dartmouth?|Dartmouth sucks!
- You go to Dartmouth?|- No, sir.
There you go!
God, Ross! What is that?
The Ultimate Fighting Combo.
I saved 30 cents.|Plus, I get to keep the cup.
From New York City, New York...
...appearing in his Ultimate|Fighting Championship debut...
...he's known for his|confrontational business style!
Ladies and gentlemen, introducing...
...Pete Becker!
I love you, Pete!
And his opponent,|from Huntington Beach, California...
...he's a 300-pound|streetfighter...
...Tank Abbott!
Pete?
Pete?
- That guy's pretty huge.|- Don't worry.
I'll use his strength|and weight against him.
Well, then that guy is in serious,|serious trouble.
You go get him. Let's go!
Here we go, gentlemen.
Are you ready?
Are you ready?|Then let's get it on!
It's me.
Monica.
Can I just tell you how proud|I am of you?
It would be nice after hearing|20,000 people chant, "You suck!"
I thought you were nuts at first...
...but you did it.
Now you can just look back at this|with no regrets.
Look back?
You're not gonna keep going?
Let me ask you a question:|Am I the Ultimate Fighting Champion?
Well, no. But...
I'm not gonna stop until I'm|the Ultimate Fighting Champion.
That guy stood on your neck|until you passed out.
Let me tell you a story.
When I set out to create MOSS 865,|do you think it happened overnight?
No. There was MOSS 1|that burned down my dad's garage.
There was MOSS 2 that would only|schedule appointments in January.
And 862 others that I learned from.
Just like I learned from this fight,|never to let a guy stand on my neck.
You didn't know that already?
Look, I'm gonna get better.
Okay? I promise you.
Just get a lot better.
Fast.
One other thing.
Hoshi thinks you being ringside|may have affected my concentration.
That was the problem.
- How long until Pete's fight?|- About five minutes.
They're interviewing his opponent.
Apparently, he trains by going to Iran|and pulling the arms off thieves.
- Hot dog?|- Four, please.
I'm really nervous.
Thank you.
So how did it go with Bonnie?
Oh, I gotta tell you,|I wasn't expecting to like her at all.
I actually wasn't expecting|to like anyone right now.
But she's really terrific.
It's too bad.
No, I'm saying I liked her.
There are other fish in the sea.
I think she's great, okay?|We're going out again.
I hear you. Are you capable|of talking about anything else?
Which one's my turkey burger?
The one next to my foot.|Sorry.
- Fight's starting!|- We'll be right in.
So did your boss try|to slap you again today?
Nine times.
I had to put on lotion.
But it'll be okay.|Tomorrow, I conduct an experiment.
And if all goes as planned,|my butt will be smack-free.
Fight's over!
Excuse me, Doug?
Hey there, sports fan!
Bing! You got those numbers for me?
No. I didn't do them.
You forgot?
No, I just didn't do them.
Instead, I hung out with some|friends and had a couple of beers.
So I certainly don't|deserve praise. Verbal...
...or otherwise.
I got tanked myself last night.|Pretty dicey drive home.
Tappan Zee Bridge never looked smaller.
That's okay. You're still|my number-one guy! Bing!
Doug!
I'm a little bit uncomfortable with|the way that you express yourself.
Is it the swearing?|Is it the constant swearing?
Because I gotta tell you, if it is,|you can just kiss my ass!
It's not about the swearing.|It's more about...
...the way that you occasionally...
...concentrate your enthusiasm...
...on my buttocks.
Don't get me wrong.|I appreciate the sentiment.
It's just that I have a rather|sensitive posterior.
And besides, it's making|all the other guys jealous.
Well, say no more. You know,|it takes guts to bring this up.
Bing, you're okay.
Would you rather live in the|shirt pocket of a sweaty giant...
...or inside his shower drain?
Oh, my God.
Look. It's Ross and that girl.
Look at that! It's a line of ants!|They're working as a team!
Right. Oh, yeah. It looks|like Ross is breaking up with her.
I hope he lets her down easy.
Look at that! They are not|breaking up! Look at them!
You know what that is?|A second date, that's what that is.
Look, she just put her hand|on his thigh.
That's nothing.|She's very sexually aggressive.
Oh, God!
It's your fault. Now he loves her.|He'll marry her. It's all your fault.
You said it was okay.
You said she was bald!
Was! Was, was, was!
We can't let it happen. We have to do|something. We have to break them up.
Just go in there and shave her head!|You owe me one bald girl!
Okay, first of all, breathe.
Second of all, I don't get it.
Aren't you the one that decided|you didn't want to be with Ross?
Well, isn't he your friend?|Don't you want him to be happy?
So?
It's just, you know, I didn't|expect him to be this happy so soon.
- Oh, no.|- What?
We killed them all!
It's not as bad as it looks.|It's a precaution.
I'm not supposed to move my spine.
Please tell me you're stopping now.
I'm fine. I'd fight tonight|if they'd let me.
Now, see this circle|I'm marking off here?
This is my Zone of Terror.
You are insane!|You've got to give this up!
I can't until I'm|the Ultimate Fighter.
I will do it.
The day will come when children will|argue over who will win a fight...
...me or Superman.
Not that I could beat Superman,|but kids are stupid.
Just sit down.
Please listen to me.
You are terrible at this, okay? You|are the worst Ultimate Fighter ever.
Ever!
I have a torn rotator cuff, a hairline|fracture in my right forearm...
...and a severely bruised Adam's|apple, but that really hurt.
Well, then, you know what?
I care about you too much to watch you|hurt yourself like this.
So if you have to do this,|you'll have to do it without me.
If you're asking me to quit...
...then you're asking me|to be someone I'm not.
I've got to do this.
Then I've gotta go.
Bye.
Could you leave a note?|I'm on painkillers...
...and I might not|remember this tomorrow.
So, in conclusion, the lines|all go up, so I'm happy.
Great job, team!|Tomorrow at 8:30.
Phil, nice job! Stevens, way to go!
Goldberg, you maniac!
I love you!
- Couldn't have done it without you.|- Thank you, sir.
Oh, excuse me.
I forgot my briefcase, you know,|by accident.
Of course, you did. Forgot|something else too, you bastard!
Well, what about you?
You're not feeling left out, are you?
No, not at all. That's ridiculous.
Everybody else got one,|and you want one too. Don't you?
Yes, I do.
Now, get on out of here, you!
{y:i}Pete Becker circles the ring.
{y:i}Looks like he's just trying|{y:i}to feel him out.
{y:i}Bruiser is charging!
Run, you crazy, rich freak!
I can't watch this.
Check it out! Pete's winning!
Really?
{y:i}Bruiser has Becker on the canvas|{y:i}and is going for his favorite area!
Wait! If that's his favorite area,|why is he being so mean to it?
This is ironic.
Your last boyfriend, Richard,|didn't want to have kids.
And from the looks of it,|now Pete can't.
Face 2004
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Friends - 10x13 - TOW Joey Speaks French
Friends - 10x14 - TOW Princess Consuela
Friends - 3 22 - The One With the Screamer
Friends - 3x01 - The One With the Princess Leia Fantasy
Friends - 3x02 - The One Where No Ones Ready
Friends - 3x03 - The One With the Jam
Friends - 3x04 - The One With the Metaphorical Tunnel
Friends - 3x05 - The One With Frank Jr
Friends - 3x06 - The One With the Flashback
Friends - 3x07 - The One With the Race Car Bed
Friends - 3x08 - The One With the Giant Poking Device
Friends - 3x09 - The One With the Football
Friends - 3x10 - The One Where Rachel Quits
Friends - 3x11 - The One Where Chandler Cant Remember
Friends - 3x12 - The One With All the Jealousy
Friends - 3x13 - The One Where Monica and Richard
Friends - 3x14 - The One With Phoebes Ex-Partner
Friends - 3x15 - The One Where Ross and Rachel Take
Friends - 3x16 - The One the Morning After
Friends - 3x17 - The One Without the Ski Trip
Friends - 3x18 - The One With the Hypnosis Tape
Friends - 3x19 - The One With the Tiny T-Shirt
Friends - 3x20 - The One With the Dollhouse
Friends - 3x21 - The One With a Chick and a Duck
Friends - 3x22 - The One With the Screamer
Friends - 3x23 - The One With Rosss Thing
Friends - 3x24 - The One With Ultimate Fighting Champ
Friends - 3x25 - The One at the Beach
Friends - 4x01 - The One With the Jellyfish
Friends - 4x02 - The One With the Cat
Friends - 4x03 - The One With the Cuffs
Friends - 4x04 - The One With the Ballroom Dancing
Friends - 4x05 - The One With Joeys New Girlfriend
Friends - 4x06 - The One With the Dirty Girl
Friends - 4x07 - The One Where Chandler Crosses
Friends - 4x08 - The One With Chandler in a Box
Friends - 4x09 - The One Where They are Going
Friends - 4x10 - The One With the Girl from
Friends - 4x11 - The One With Phoebes Uterus
Friends - 4x12 - The One With the Embryos
Friends - 4x13 - The One With Rachels Crush
Friends - 4x14 - The One With Joeys Dirty Day
Friends - 4x15 - The One With All the Rugby
Friends - 4x16 - The One With the Fake Party
Friends - 4x17 - The One With the Free Porn
Friends - 4x18 - The One With Rachels New Dress
Friends - 4x19 - The One With All the Haste
Friends - 4x20 - The One With All the Wedding Dresses
Friends - 4x21 - The One With the Invitation
Friends - 4x22 - The One With the Worst Best Man Ever
Friends - 4x23 - The One With Rosss Wedding - part 1
Friends - 4x24 - The One With Rosss Wedding - part 2
Friends - 5x01 - The One After Ross Says Rachel
Friends - 5x02 - The One With All the Kissing
Friends - 5x03 - The One Hundreth
Friends - 5x04 - The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS
Friends - 5x05 - The One With the Kips
Friends - 5x06 - The One With the Yeti
Friends - 5x07 - The One Where Ross Moves In
Friends - 5x08 - The One With All the Thanksgivins
Friends - 5x09 - The One With Rosss Sandwich
Friends - 5x10 - The One With the Inappropiate Sister
Friends - 5x11 - The One With All the Resolutions
Friends - 5x12 - The One With Chandlers Work Laugh
Friends - 5x13 - The One With Joeys Bag
Friends - 5x14 - The One Where Everyone Finds Out
Friends - 5x15 - The One With the Girl Who Hits Joey
Friends - 5x16 - The One With the Cop
Friends - 5x17 - The One With Rachels
Friends - 5x18 - The One Where Rachel Smokes
Friends - 5x19 - The One Where Ross Cant Flirt
Friends - 5x20 - The One With the Ride-Along
Friends - 5x21 - The One With the Ball
Friends - 5x22 - The One With Joeys Big Break
Friends - 5x23 - The One in Vegas
Friends - 6x01 - The One After Vegas
Friends - 6x02 - The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel
Friends - 6x03 - The One With Rosss Denial
Friends - 6x04 - The One Where Joey Loses His
Friends - 6x05 - The One With Joeys Porsche
Friends - 6x06 - The One On the Last Night
Friends - 6x07 - The One Where Phoebe Runs
Friends - 6x08 - The One With Rosss Teeth
Friends - 6x15
Friends 7x01 - The One with Monicas Thunder
Friends 7x02 - The One With Rachels Book
Friends 7x03 - The One With Phoebes Cookies
Friends 7x04 - The One With Rachels Assistant
Friends 7x05 - The One With The Engagement Picture
Friends 7x06 - The One With The Nap Partners
Friends 7x07 - The One with Rosss Library Book
Friends 7x08 - The One Where Chandler Doesnt Like Dogs
Friends 7x09 - The One With All the Candy
Friends 7x10 - The One With The Holiday Armadillo
Friends 7x11 - The One With All The Cheesecakes
Friends 7x12 - The One Where They are Up All Night
Friends 7x13 - The One Where Rosita Dies
Friends 7x14 - The One Where They All Turn Thirty
Friends 7x15 - The One With Joeys New Brain
Friends 7x16 - The One With the Truth About London
Friends 7x17 - The One With the Cheap Wedding Dress
Friends 7x18 - The One With Joeys Award
Friends 7x19 - The One With Ross and Monicas Cousin
Friends 7x20 - The One With Rachels Kisses
Friends 7x21 - The One With the Vows
Friends 7x22 - The One With Chandlers Dad
Friends 7x23 - The One With Monica and Chandlers Wedding Part 1
Friends 7x24 - The One With Monica and Chandlers Wedding Part 2
Friends 9x01 - The One Where No One Proposes
Friends 9x02 - The One Where Emma Cries
Friends 9x03 - The One With The Pediatrician
Friends 9x04 - The One With The Sharks
Friends 9x05 - The One With Phoebes Birthday Dinner
Friends 9x06 - The One With The Male Nanny
Friends 9x07 - The One With Rosss Inappropriate Song
Friends 9x08 - The One With Rachels Other Sister
Friends 9x09 - The One With Rachels Phone Number
Friends 9x10 - The One With Christmas In Tulsa
Friends 9x11 - The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work
Friends 9x12 - The One With Phoebes Rats
Friends 9x13 - The One Where Monica Sings
Friends 9x14 - The One With The Blind Dates
Friends 9x15 - The One With The Mugging
Friends 9x16 - The One With The Boob Job
Friends 9x17 - The One With The Memorial Service
Friends 9x18 - The One With The Lottery
Friends 9x19 - The One With Rachels Dream
Friends 9x20 - The One With The Soap Opera Party
Friends 9x21 - The One With The Fertility Test
Friends 9x22 - The One With The Donor
Friends 9x23-24 - The One In Barbados 1 2)
Frisson des vampires Le
From Beijing with love
From Dusk Till Dawn
From Dusk Till Dawn 3 The Hangmans Daughter
From Hell
From Justin To Kelly (Special Edition)
Frontera La
Frusta e il corpo La
Fucking Amal
Fudoh The New Generation 1996
Fugitive The - The Chase Continues
Fugitives (2000)
Fukssvansen (Chop Chop)
Full Frontal 2002
Full Metal Jacket
Full Time Killer
Fun Movie (2002 Korean) CD1
Fun Movie (2002 Korean) CD2
Fun in Acapulco (Richard Thorpe 1963)
Funeral Parade of Roses
Funeral in Berlin
Funny Girl
Fuochi dArtifizio
Furia (2002)
Fury The (1978)
Futurama 1x01 - Space Pilot 3000
Futurama 1x02 - The Series Has Landed
Futurama 1x03 - I Roommate
Futurama 1x04 - Loves Labors Lost in Space
Futurama 1x05 - Fear of a Bot Planet
Futurama 1x06 - A Fishful of Dollars
Futurama 1x07 - My Three Suns
Futurama 1x08 - A Big Piece of Garbage
Futurama 1x09 - Hell is Other Robots
Futurama 2x01 - A Flight to Remember
Futurama 2x02 - Mars University
Futurama 2x03 - When Aliens Attack
Futurama 2x04 - Fry and the Slurm Factory
Futurama 3x01 - Amazon Women in the Mood
Futurama 3x02 - Parasites Lost
Futurama 3x03 - A Tale of Two Santas
Futurama 3x04 - The Luck of the Fryrish
Futurama 3x05 - The Birdbot of Ice-catraz
Futurama 3x06 - Bendless Love
Futurama 3x07 - The Day the Earth Stood Stupid
Futurama 3x08 - Thats Lobstertainment
Futurama 3x09 - The Cyber House Rules
Futurama 3x10 - Insane in the Mainframe
Futurama 3x10 - Where The Buggalo Roam
Futurama 3x12 - The Route of All Evil
Futurama 3x13 - Bendin in the Wind
Futurama 3x14 - Time Keeps on Slippin
Futurama 3x15 - I Dated a Robot
Futurama 3x16 - A Leela of Her Own
Futurama 3x17 - A Pharaoh To Remember
Futurama 3x18 - Anthology of Interest Part 2
Futurama 3x19 - Roswell That Ends Well
Futurama 3x20 - Godfellas
Futurama 3x21 - Future Stock
Futurama 3x22 - The 30 Iron Chef
Futurama 4x01 - Kif Gets Knocked Up a Notch
Futurama 4x02 - Leelas Homeworld
Futurama 4x03 - Love and Rocket
Futurama 4x04 - Less Than Hero
Futurama 4x05 - A Taste of Freedom
Futurama 4x06 - Bender Should Not Be Allowed on TV
Futurama 4x07 - Jurassic Bark
Futurama 4x08 - Crimes of the Hot
Futurama 4x09 - Teenage Mutant Leelas Hurdles
Futurama 4x10 - The Why of Fry
Futurama 4x11 - Where no Fan Has Gone Before
Futurama 4x12 - The Sting
Futurama 4x13 - Bend Her
Futurama 4x14 - Obsoletely Fabulous
Futurama 4x15 - The Farnsworth Parabox
Futurama 4x16 - Three Hundred Big Boys
Futurama 4x17 - Spanish Fry
Futurama 4x18 - The Devils Hands are Idle Playthings
Fyra Nyanser Av Brunt CD1
Fyra Nyanser Av Brunt CD2