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I Accidentally Domed Your Son

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Man: Everybody wanna know why people smoke weed.
You know, I mean, I can't talk for everybody,
you know what I'm saying?
But...
- I mean, to me... - ( gunshot )
I ACClDENTALLY DOMED YOUR SON
...this shit is beautiful.
§ Why you act like that? The green made me do it §
§ lf you got the greenest weed, then take me to it §
§ Why you act like that? 'Cause I can §
§ Come on, man, puff puff, give until I'm not able to stand §
§ Why you act like that? The green made me do it §
§ lf you got the greenest weed, then take me to it §
§ Why you act like that? We cop together and smoke pot forever §
§ ln all the weed spots of America §
§ Yo, smoke the stuff, let your mind get open enough §
§ To where bitches is hold'n to fuck §
§ Hold'n the mean ype and more weed for life §
§ I have some of you niggas saying §
§ "I seen the light." §
§ Hit blunts like the weed is right §
§ Cause a cigar is unbelievably nice §
§ Look at the gleamin' nights §
§ 'Cause we doing the damn thing tonight §
§ Me and my team is tight §
§ Puff wootas so green and swite §
§ Look at the chronic get into you §
§ Can't handle with the army has sent at you §
§ 'Cause even the fucking coughs have finished you §
§ Till the nausea finishes you, gag and spit... §
- I'm saved! - § Call up a doctor for the shit §
§ Once you're knocking the bang like a large bitten feel like §
§ Now you feel like you're on shit on some hospital shit §
§ You feel it's not rocks and spliffs, so now you got to hop in the wip §
§ And hope you don't vomit your dick. §
What's up, Brisco?
What's happening?
Nothing, let me get that one.
- What? - That one.
The biggest piece of chicken on the grill?
Man, I'm hungry.
J-Rob! Did you invite Hay Love?
Hell no!
Every time we barbecue,
he never brings a damn thing.
What?
Man, why y'all trippin'. I did bring something.
What'd you bring?
Beer, I brought beer.
Fool, you brought one 40-ouncer and drank all that up your damn self.
- Excuse me. - Damn!
How 're you doing, baby? My name is Hay Love.
Hi. ls your meat ready?
Yes. My meat is ready.
You want double meat?
No, thanks, I'll just-- I'll just have the chicken.
Oh yeah.
- Take the biggest piece. - Thanks.
What? Why she get the biggest piece? What she bring?
That ass!
- Big P! - What up, J-Rob?
- How are you doing, man? - All right, how are you doing?
- Cool, man. - Hey, Brisco, look who's here!
About time. What the fuck took you so long?
Your mamma wouldn't let me go.
You keep talking that shit and I'm gonna stop using Vaseline on your sister.
Pedro, let me help with your brew!
- What you bring? - Pedro, why you trippin'?
What you bring, Hay Love?
That ass.
Damn! That's you?
Yeah.
Let me introduce myself
and tell her what a great guy she has.
Oh, no, no, no, no.
She don't like being bothered while she eats.
Yeah, right, fool.
- Look out! - Pedro!
Let me handle that brew.
- Let me handle that brew, Pedro. - You can handle these nuts.
- Hey, put this on the grill. - Oh, now I'm Benson.
No, just kidding.
- What is it? - Carne asada.
- Put that shit on. - Yeah.
- Hey Brisco, you got some bones? - Oh, hell yeah.
Oh, yeah, yeah, hold up a second though.
Hey homie, take a picture real quick. I got my camera.
Picture of the homies.
All right.
You can't be hangin' no dominoes. What the fuck is wrong with you?
Fool, you can't hang.
That's why I beat your ass
seven games last week and took $200 from you.
Don't act like you are used to this.
What the fuck? So you're a history teacher now?
That was last week, I'm talking about right now.
You'll never beat me again, or take another dime from me.
Domino, motherfucker!
Am I a history teacher? Yeah, I do current events, too.
You owe me 200 more dollars and I want it.
Whatever man, I'll get you that.
- You guys be cheating! - I'll beat y'all ass.
Man, forget these dominoes, let's get some bud.
Why you saying "let's," like you got some money?
Man, I ain't had no bomb-ass bud in about three months.
- Well, let's get some. - From where?
My homie Big Will.
Wait a minute, don't he live in 8 trays?
Man, he don't bang. He just sell bud.
He may not bang, but all of them fools around him do.
Them 8 trays is crazy as a motherfucker.
My homie Cesar, pleny of bud. He'll give it us for free, too.
And his daddy is Mexican mafia.
Well, we got to do one. We need bud.
I ain't fucking with them.
Let's roll to my boy Cesar's then.
We'll be up out of the house before his pops knows we're there.
I'd rather do that, because 8 trays
is feuding with the little knuckle heads from around here.
Homie, I'd say let's just get something to drink and kick it.
What? We got drink. We need bud.
Hay Love, do you have some money?
Man, y'all know I'm waiting on my check.
I'm just trying to hook y'all up.
I mean, I might just want to take a little hit.
Just like I thought.
lf you gonna charge me for a couple of hits,
you can have my last two dollars.
Two dollars?
Hit what?
Who got the bud?
- Oh, shit! - Ray Ray?
- When you get out? - Two hours ago.
What's up, Hay Love?
- Uh, nothing. - You still a bitch!
Yeah, yeah, pretty much.
Roll me up a fatty, fool.
- Uh... - You heard me, bitch!
Roll me up a joint!
Hold up, homie, we ain't got no weed.
- Where you going? - I don't know.
- Hay Love, where you going? - I don't know.
Hey homie, we was trying to decide
on where we were going to get the bud from.
Either Pedro's homeboy or Hay Love's people, Big Will.
Big Will from 8 trays?
Man, he don't bang, he just sell bud!
Yeah, well you go on with me.
What? We haven't decided if we goin' over there or not!
I decide! I need to handle some of them fools anyway!
I don't bang. What you want from me?
- Shut the fuck up, you go! - Homie, hold up.
You can't just be kidnapping people and shit.
That shit's foul, man.
- You just got out of jail. - Mm-hmm.
Shit don't work like that no more.
Times have changed.
People get shot for that shit now!
So, should I shoot you motherfuckers?
- Oh, shit! - Ray Ray's got a gun!
You just got out two hours ago. How'd you get a gun already?
Ray Ray, calm down.
Do I look nervous? Brisco!
Do I look nervous?
No, actually you look pretty fucking calm.
You know why? Hay Love, do you know why?
Because 10 years in prison made you realize that violence is not the way?
Hell no! Smoking fools ain't no thing to me.
I'd kill all you motherfuckers then sit down and eat cheesecake.
Get one big fat-ass pastramis from the hamburger stand down the street.
Pedro, they still make them pastramis?
- Yeah. - Cool, we can get one on the way.
- Man, I don't know! - Oh, oh! I'm sorry.
I have to apologize to you, Hay Love.
Somewhere along the line you got the impression
that you have a choice.
But if you don't get your ass in that car,
I ain't gonna be mad, but my gun...
gonna be pissed off.
Bye y'all.
I really need some bud now.
Man, I feel you but...
is fuckin' with your boy Cesar and his father really worth it?
Man, after that shit, I'd steal some weed out of the FBI evidence room.
- You know what I'm sayin'? - I need to get high.
- Well, let's do the damn thing. - Yeah.
Ray Ray, what you doing, man?
This is where they hang out at.
That's what I mean. What the fuck are you doing?
Ray Ray, what you doing, man?
I'm gonna eat this pastrami, then I'm gonna go over there,
and smoke either all or some them fools.
- For what? - When I was in the pen,
one of the homeboys was talking shit to me.
So where is he?
He's still locked up.
So you mean to tell me you gonna shoot up everybody except for him?
That's the way it goes, player.
What you want with me? I'm gonna run!
- Oh, you gonna run out on me? - Man, I ain't got no gun or nothing.
There you go.
What the fuck you want me to do with this, throw it?
That motherfucker might work.
This old-ass gun, who's is it, Wyatt Earp's?
Don't be shaking that motherfucker around, it might go off.
What?
All I'm saying is, if you got to sneeze or something,
you better put the motherfucker down first.
- Oh my God! - Why you soundin' like a little bitch?
- I-- I-- uh-- - Look, when I was in the pen,
all I could do is think about smoking 8 trays.
When them motherfuckers were fucking with big Ray Ray,
they didn't know who they were fucking with.
- Uh-uh-uh-- - But it's too late.
Now I'm about to kill all their asses.
I'm gonna go down to smoke--
what the fuck is wrong with you?
( gasping )
- Hey! - ( gunshot )
Oh shit! Oh shit! Oh shit!
Hold up, hold up. Hay Love!
- Antwon! - Nigga don't be calling me that shit.
- They call me Bit Ant! - No problem, Big Ant.
I mean, Bii-ig Ant. I mean, Big, Big, Big, Big Ant!
Who's this nigga, cos? We gonna off this nigga, or what?
Hell no, this is my sister's baby daddy.
What you doing with this fool?
Man, he kidnapped me. I was just trying to get some bud!
You been taking care of my little niece?
Yeah! Oh, hell yeah!
I went there and dropped some diapers.
- What? Nigga, she 12! - Oh!
You better get your ass over there and help my sister.
That's what I'm gonna do when I leave here.
I'm leaving here, right?
Damn, this is the boonies.
I thought you said he lived in Hollywood Hills or something.
They do. When I called, he gave me this address,
and said meet him here.
Oh!
Hey!
- Hey, Will. - What's up, man?
How you doing? What is up with the desert ranch?
This is where my dad has his monthly fights.
Fights?
Hey, man, these are my boys, J-Rob and Brisco.
- Hey, what's going on? - Yeah.
- What's happening? - Chillin'.
- So, what's up with those fights? - My dad has these bad-ass fighters.
I mean, bad-ass dudes that know all kinds of martial arts,
you know, like kick boxing, grappling, all that shit.
He invites them here once a month to fight,
then he invites some wealthy friends over to bet on them.
You think we should be knowing all this shit?
Don't worry about it bro, my dad's cool. Come on in.
Man, you know, no disrespect,
I just think we should just get a little bud from you and then we'll roll out.
Nonsense. Pedro, come on!
- Just for a minute, man. - Yeah.
ln and out.
Come on, it'll be quick man. He's right.
- Just for a second. - All right!
- Just for a minute. - Yeah, yeah.
Pedro.
You guys want anything to drink?
- No, I'm cool. - Me too.
- Pedro? - That's all right.
Lighten up. Why are you guys so uptight?
lt's my dad, isn't it?
- Oh no, man! - Hell no!
Yeah, it is-- you guys heard all this crazy shit in the news
about how he's this crazy maniac mob killer.
- Naw. - Man, I ain't heard nothing.
I don't even watch the news.
You need to meet him. I'm gonna go get him.
No, no, wait! Hold up, hold up, Cesar, Cesar!
Damn!
What's up, Pedro? I ain't trying to see this motherfucker.
What the fuck you want me to do?
Speak some Spanish or something
and get us up out this motherfucker.
You got us caught up in shit.
Fuck you, J-Rob. You wanted the weed as bad as I did.
- I didn't. - Hey, guys...
this is my dad, Fredrico Sanchez.
Hey, boys!
- How you doing, Mr. Sanchez? - ( laughs )
- Sir. - Stop that Mr. Sanchez and sir stuff.
We're all family here. Call me Fredrico.
Ooh! As a matter of fact, call me Fred.
- How are you, big guy! - Fine, Mr. Sanchez.
Not Mr. Sanchez, it's Fred. Come on, say it.
- Fred. - Ahh! There you go!
And how are you?
- Oh, I'm-- I'm-- I'm fine sir. - Uhh-- ooh.
- Fred. - Ahh.
Ahh, ooh.
- And how about you? - I'm cool.
Yeah, huh? Uh-go-goo!
See? I told you guys. Pedro, didn't I tell you?
- Yeah, yeah, you told us. - My dad's the coolest.
- Well, thank you, son. - No problem.
I love you Dad.
I-I-I love you too, son.
Oh, Dad, can my friends come to the fight?
Well... I guess it's okay.
As long as they know, it's something
that cannot be spoken about beyond these walls.
You guys understand, right?
- Of course. - Definitely.
Don't even worry about it, Fred.
I guess it's no problem!
Now will you guys have a drink?
- Yeah, that's-- -Yeah, I'll have a drink.
- I'll have a drink. - What do you suggest, Fred?
Oh, well, we ha-- we have excellent brandy.
- That's cool. - Three brandies!
- You want anything pop? - Oh, no.
- I'll be right back. - Man, this is cool, big Fred.
I am glad you are enjoying yourself.
- Thank you for the hospitaliy. - Fuck you, you little bitch.
What's wrong, Fred?
You, call me Fred one more time...
I swear I'll stick this fucking spoon in your worthless throat, huh?
Oh my God!
I don't know how you three
hairy horse nuts know my son,
but I do know this,
my son means everything to me.
His mother died when he was 11 years old,
God rest her soul.
The woman was a saint.
And after she died,
I protected him. I sheltered him.
Private schools, nannies, everything,
to keep him away from losers
like you three.
Now, he's all grown, he likes, as you would say,
to do his own thing!
And I cannot stop him, and lf I try,
he will hate me. But I can protect him.
So...
if he so much as catches a cold,
while he is around you,
that would be a vacation
compared to what I would do
to you three pieces of pig shit.
- Hey, Dad. - Hi, son!
Oh, ha, hey, you boys,
better get out there-- Mariano's about to fight!
And you know he's your favorite, son.
- ( growls ) - Let's go!
Out of all you stupid asses,
you seem to be the least stupid.
- Uh... thank you. - Shut up.
I'm holding you personally responsible for my boy.
lf anything happens to him,
I'm just going to kill your friends, but you--
I am going to have a doctor on the scene.
And every time my men almost beat you half to death,
I'm going to have the doctor bring you back.
That way I'll be able to kill you five times.
ls your little brain able to comprehend this?
Mm-hmm.
Well...
get the fuck out of my house, you 're stinking idiot.
I see you were back there talking to my dad. He's cool, huh?
Yeah, ice cold.
Oh, here come the fighters. This is gonna be good.
What kind of satanic shit is this, man?
I don't know, but weed or not, I'm ready to bounce.
I've been ready to bounce, let's go.
What is bounce?
Oh, it means giving thanks to the host.
Ahhh! I just hope you're not talking about running out on my son.
That would make him very sad.
And when he gets sad, I get mad.
No, sir.
Never.
Wouldn't think of it, sir.
Hey, Mariano.
This is gonna be good. Let's go.
Ladies and gentlemen,
you are about to witness a challenge
between two major forces of nature.
Our current opponent,
weighing 260 pounds, the Highlander...
versus our current champion, weighing 275,
Mariano Big Dog.
Gentlemen, let's fight!
- § How many niggas come to brawl § - § Fight music §
- § Another motherfucker on the wall § - § Fight music §
- § You come down right to your fall § - § Fight music §
§ Catching niggas from the side of the car §
- § How many niggas come to brawl? § - § Fight music §
- § A motherfucking fight on the wall § - § Fight music §
- § You come down right to your fall § - § Fight music §
§ Catching niggas from the side of the car §
§ lntroducing the man of the year §
§ From manic it's simply clear when you examine you can fear §
§ Like all of the sphere, half cannibal half bear §
§ Actions you spare if you know a nigga badder than this §
§ Laughing at all you fagots some more §
§ You still bat about as fast a dog §
§ You can crash like a car... natural fall §
§ After the judge, rehab, and the ball § you won it all from cash wars §
§ So you ask for a job forget the predictions §
§ Sickest niggas that listen and even if you critics is bitchin' §
§ My mission, pay the ammunition, put on a hard hat §
§ Don't call us relax while I'm on combat §
§ Study the opponents I told you attack §
§ Checkin the sources for the niggas all that §
§ Categorize a niggas rhymes all that §
§ lt's a new testament of an exclusive specimen §
§ Diggin my boots in the best of the niggas crews §
§ No hype, no journalist writes no sound bytes §
§ Just a night of 1,000 mics surrounding you sight §
§ Pound for pound of might now pounds of strikes §
§ Shout out your price... §
( chorus repeats )
Yeah!
- ( growling ) - Yeah!
Mariano!
Hey, thank you, Cesar! We're out of here, bro.
I thought we were gonna chief one.
Oh, you know,
my boy J-Rob, you know? He got the shits, bro.
Yeah, yeah, this shit is terrible, dawg.
I think I need a cork or something.
- I'm going with you guys. Dad! - No, no, no.
- Dad. - ls everything okay, son?
Yeah, I'm gonna go with my friends.
Hey, why don't you stay here with me, son, you know, hang out?
Yeah, yeah, why don't you kick it with pops?
- Stay with the pops. - Ain't nothing like family, homie.
I've been here all day. I want to get out for a while.
But Cesar--
Dad, you're not about to start treating me like a child again, are you?
No, son, no. Go.
Go.
Thanks, Dad.
We'll be back later. C'mon, guys, let's go.
Yeah.
Make sure you call my sister. Tell her what I did for you.
- Tell her to make some tacos tonight. - All right then, fa sho.
§ Baby, you rollin' with the greatest §
§ Comin' threw with nothin but the latest §
§ Blowing trees, I tried to tell these fools they can't keep up with me §
§ Slippin' and slidin', drippin' and ridin', on the streets clean mobbin' §
§ Deep, in the back keep ya heads bobbin' §
§ Watch at the bus stop as my trunk drop §
§ When I stack up, wheels lookin' like mirrors as they creep up... §
Hey, we need to hurry up and get this motherfucker home.
We need to make sure nothing happens to him.
'Cause if it does, our ass is grass.
Let's tell him we got to do something and he got to go home.
Man, that's stupid.
You got a better idea?
- Anything is better than that shit. - Fuck you!
- Fuck you, punk! - Hey, this ain't gonna get us nowhere.
We're all a little upset.
- I'm upset, he stupid. - You stupid.
What're you doing? Get over here and smoke some of this bud.
Be right there, homie.
Come on, big dawg,
let's smoke this bud so I can get back home.
You just want to smoke out and go to the pad?
Yeah, that's why I'm here. I can't smoke in front of pops.
So we just go hit this bud and take you home.
Yeah, dude, what the fuck? I mean, is that all right?
This might turn out to be cool.
Let's smoke this bud and get rid of his ass.
- I'm with that. - Yeah.
Fire it up, homie.
Oh, hell no, dawg, I'm the one that's most stressed out.
Let me hit that shit first.
Be careful, that ain't the regular shit. That's the bomb-diggiy.
Bro, let me tell you something, homie.
I been smoking weed for years, right? No weed--
- ( Jamaican calypso playing ) - § J'american... §
§ Ya, in the place mon §
§ When the shot is a hot list, Hollywood, nuff respect... §
Just like that?
§ ...And then you watch me mon and then you holla §
§ What you want to just about me fight too §
§ That's exactly what's goin' on that is right too §
( singing continues )
§ Hello. La gente se alucina cuando oye mi voz §
§ Yo sé que yo no tengo yo sé que sí yo tengo §
§ Yo siempre quiero hacer el sexo, sexo §
§ Sexo §
( laughing )
§ ...And show me what you got, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha §
Oh, shit! Oh, shit!
§ Yo sé que quiero hacer el sexo, sexo §
I no want no more. I no want no more.
I no want no more.
I no want no more.
§ Pídelo, muévelo, gózalo, agárralo §
§ Muévete y déjalo §
§ Sacúdelo, sacúdelo §
§ Pégalo, pégalo, más, más §
§ Pégalo, pégalo, más, más §
§ Pégalo, pégalo, pégalo, pégalo, pégalo, más, más §
( music continues )
Man, y'all ain't gonna believe--
what the fuck wrong with y'all?
( laughing )
- What's up? - Hey Love.
You want some weed? Man, weed got y'all acting like that?
lt's the bomb-diggiy!
Man, y'all need to listen to what just happened!
Hay Love, man.
What you need to do is come over here and hit this joint
and calm down.
On the moon.
And then tell us what happened.
I ain't never had no problem smoking no weed.
I mean, that's what all the shit is over-- I just wanted some weed.
( coughing ) Mama!
Now what you get to tell us, dawg?
They got Ray Ray. They got him.
I tried to tell him--
I tried to tell him let's get some weed but he wouldn't listen.
He took out a gun, and he gave me one.
See?
Damn, that's a raggedy-ass gun.
Then what happened, dawg?
Then he was talking shit to me, and they snuck up behind us,
and bam!
Blood, brains and pastrami meat all over me.
They got Ray Ray.
How'd you get away?
You remember that ugly bitch I got pregnant?
Shaniqua.
Yeah, she ugly and her baby ugly.
But I tell you what,
that little ugly motherfucker saved my life today.
So today, I love ugly. Viva la ugly, viva la ugly!
Oh shit.
Ahh, shit!
Ahh, shit!
You stupid motherfucker. Ahh, shit!
No! No! No!
Oh, shit!
Oh, shit!
You killed him!
Shoot yourself.
- What? - Shoot your damn self. Do it now!
- Hold on, Brisco. - Fuck that.
lt was an accident!
lt doesn't matter. We're still dead!
Accident? You are fucking accident!
What we gonna do?
We gonna kill Hay Love.
- No, I don't like that plan. - What good is that gonna do?
We call Fredrico, we'll tell him some stupid-ass fucking retarded idiot
came in to rob us, and he shot Cesar,
and we shot him,
and to prove it we'll take Hay Love's dead body.
I don't like that plan.
- We can't do it, Brisco. - Yes we can, yes we can.
Pedro, he trippin'.
Oh, no! Y'all gonna kill me?
Please don't kill me, please.
I'll do anything. Wait a minute, I got a gun.
Y'all talking about how you're gonna kill me.
I'll kill your motherfucker ass!
Homie, the trigger and the firing pin fell off the gun when you shot it.
Nobody can use this gun.
We'll kill him with garden tools.
And that way it'll look like we was mad.
We just went crazy!
Brisco, you trippin'.
You think of something! lf you don't like my shit,
y'all think of something.
What you thinking, Pedro?
Just got to call Fredrico and just tell him what happened.
You remember what he said when we was there.
He just gonna kill y'all one time.
He gonna kill me like five fucking times.
What?
Look, it doesn't matter.
We fucked up, whether it was an accident or not.
His son is dead. He deserves to know.
I ain't calling.
Make this motherfucker call.
- Me? - Yeah, you stupid-- you did it.
I don't know what to say!
I'm gonna get that shovel, you get the rake, let's bash his fucking head!
All right, all right, hold on, you damn maniac gardeners, I'll do it!
Well, do it then. Make the fucking call.
Damn, what's the number?
555-7395.
Hello, I don't know how to tell you this but...
we accidentally domed your son.
Oh, domed means...
shoot him in the head, by accident though.
I'm sorry, but y'all need to come get him or something-- he just lying here.
She taking it hard, man.
I know, ma'am, I'm sorry. lt's fucked up.
Hey Love, who're you talking to?
- I guess, his mother. - His mother?
She keep talking about "my son, my son, he's only eight years old!"
Does this motherfucker look eight years old to you?
I don't know, I guess she's delirious or something!
- What number did you dial? - The number that you gave me.
555-7395?
95? I thought you said 7399!
- Woman: Hello? - Oh, never mind.
- You stupid. - Give me the phone.
I'll do it.
Mr. Sanchez?
There's been an accident.
Cesar didn't make it.
What did he say? What did he say?
Before or after
he said he was gonna kill us all?
Slowly, except for Brisco.
He said something about killing you slowly times five.
And then there was just a lot of screaming and crying.
Let's just call the police and say it was an accident.
For what? We still going to jail.
And they can get us in prison just as easy.
We need help. We got to hide.
And where are we going to hide? They can find us anywhere we go!
- We fucked! - We need to call Krago.
Yeah, that's your homeboy, right?
He'll know exactly what to do.
Who's he?
When we was kids, he used to be in this fucked up abusive foster home,
so he ran away
and I used to take him clothes and food and Cool-Aid and shit.
Why haven't I met him? I never even heard of him.
He's a criminal. He a baller though.
Shut up. He's my dawg, though.
He just do his own thing and I do mine.
- Our lifesyles just don't mix. - Until now.
Oh, where's mommy?
Look, look, who is that?
That's mommy. "Hi mommy, I miss you."
Want some candy?
Look, ah, oh!
Ooh, candy!
Yay!
So many hopes and dreams
cut down--
cut down by some maggots
that don't deserve to live another day.
I just want them to suffer.
Consistent pain is all I want for these parasites.
Did someone call?
Can you bring them to me?
Sweetie, for the right price I can find 2 Pac.
Then go, go and do what you do.
§ Come on, come on §
§ I'm gonna need y'all to bounce §
§ Bounce, bounce §
§ Bounce, baby §
§ I'm gonna take y'all for a ride §
§ Come on, come on §
§ Come on! §
§ Seat belts on §
§ I wish these scary motherfuckers leave me alone §
§ Watch ya tone, bitch §
§ Why is my hot ass attire as high as my tone? §
§ I'm slagging these fools... §
Hey, Krego, cats wanna holler at you, man.
That's my nigga, man.
Spider always wants to hit a nigga.
- What's up, Krego? - Oh, man, I can't complain.
- I can see that. - Oh, yeah.
- Hey, shit, we need your help. - Oh I know you need my help.
lt's a long story.
Listen...
you cats hit Fredrico Sanchez's boy.
- That's some deep shit. - How did you know that, man?
How do I know that? I know everything that goes on in the streets.
I am the motherfucker streets, man.
I'm Krego, dawg.
Look, man, that shit was an accident, I'm telling you, dawg.
I know you, man.
What I don't know is how you get caught up in some shit like that?
Hey, what's up?!
- That answers the question. - I thought I told you wait in the car.
Man, I got worried.
Y'all got honies back here, what's up with that?
Y'all back here partying while I'm in the car. What's happening, Krego?
Look, I told you back in the days, man, you fuck with certain niggas,
you gonna get caught up, homie.
You gonna get hit.
'Cause certain niggas get you in some shit.
That's why when I did my shit, right, I was on the low.
That's why I didn't hang out.
I know, homie, no disrespect, dawg,
but I ain't really got time to hear that shit right now.
Yeah, nigga, you're right about that. Shit.
So, what should we do?
The first thing is-- this Fredrico nigga is for real, man.
- Remember that Fredrico nigga? - Hell yeah, he wasn't no joke.
See, he powerful and he got connections, man.
So, I've been thinking, right,
ain't nothing you can do really at all,
you know what I mean?
He gonna catch y'all, and he gonna smoke y'all niggas.
Tony.
Unless I change who y'all are.
- What? - What?
- What you mean? - Hold on, hold on, hold on.
Hey, y'all gots to roll.
Everybody beat it. Everybody split.
Remember what I told you though.
What I mean is, I gots to change who you niggas is.
You mean like switch lD's? 'Cause I ain't got mine right now.
But I do got the little temporary one DMV gave me, though.
Hay Love, shut up!
Y'all come on over here, man. You crazy, nigga!
You know, as soon as I heard about what was cracking I got something for you.
Oh, you knew I was gonna come to you, huh?
Of course, nigga. I'm the only nigga you can come to.
Who else?
You were the only one I could come to, man,
when I was goin' through the shit I was goin' through.
- That's right. - Everybody knows this.
Which is why y'all got to get the fuck out of my house.
I don't want Fredrico coming over to this motherfucker.
Y'all can't blow up my spot.
- Thank you, brother. - I know what you mean.
Now look, when I tell you all this shit...
got to keep an open mind. Y'all with me?
She's real cool. lt's real easy.
Plastic surgery.
- What? - Like titties? Ah, hell no!
lt's gonna be some big ass titties,
just as gonna be Hay Love with big ass tities. Ain't gonna know it's--
Hay Love, shut up.
You don't care if you get some big ass tities?
They talkin' about our faces, man.
You are talking about our faces, right?
Of course I'm talking about y'all motherfuckin' faces, man.
Y'all look like y'all need to change your faces any-motherfuckin'-way.
We gonna get some tities on our faces?
Baby! Come here, baby. Come here.
Get this nigga, take him in there, and give him a motherfuckin' drink.
Or I'll shoot him my goddamn self.
lt'll be Krego Fredrico, motherfucker. Get him out of here.
This nigga crazy.
That's why you are all in the shit you all into, man.
I don't know about this, dawg. ls there something else we can do?
Bra, you don't understand me, man.
This nigga ain't no motherfucking joke y'all niggas is fuckin with, man.
I know, man, I know! But...
man, you're talking about changing who I am, man.
Man, I ain't talking about changing who you niggas is, man.
Who you are is on the inside humming.
And nothing could change that, you dig?
But the outside is what needs to be changed.
Only thing is gonna be different is the way y'all look.
He ain't gonna make us look all crazy and shit, is he?
Yeah, I don't wanna look all fucked up and shit.
- You already look fucked up! - You crazy.
That ain't what's gonna switch about the game.
- I'm gonna make you look tight. - Well, fuck it then. Let's do it.
Y'all listen, and y'all listen close, man.
Now that we got Hay Love the fuck out of here.
These people, right?
Listen close, how can I break this down spot?
Give it straight, dawg.
Now these people, they're more dangerous
than the niggas that's trying to fuck you all up.
You know what I mean by that?
They are not for play, you understand?
- Fuck it, where do we got to go? - Arizona.
- Damn, they ain't got no local branch? - Yeah.
Hey hell no, man, these niggas are discreet, nigga.
And they don't want a gang of motherfuckers all in their mix.
Only a handful of people know where these motherfuckers is at.
And they wanna keep it that way, Brisc.
So, what do we do?
Well the first thing is, you take you some money,
and you go to this location. I'll write it down for you.
- ls that the place in Arizona? - You're damn right.
Then what?
Then you go to the location and they'll tell you what to do.
Y'all move fast, and we're so slow.
Man, this shit sounds like highly expensive, man.
How much is all this shit gonna cost?
We'll get to that later!
Brisc, fuck with me, work with me, man, goddamn!
And the second most important motherfucker thing,
is this motherfuckin' little dandy right here.
Let me find that shit out of my motherfuckin' pocket.
Ha.
There's this card, you dig? You understand?
Now without this card...
they definitely-- and insequently,
if you motherfuckers show up without this,
they're gonna blow y'all motherfuckin' ass off.
Remember, these niggas is as crazy as the niggas
that's trying to blow your head off now.
lf not more.
Y'all can't drive that bucket y'all got out there, man.
Then how the fuck are we supposed to get there?
You go grab Hay Butt,
and y'all motherfuckers meet me in the garage.
§ Ha ha ha ha ha §
§ Like a nigga baby, like a nigga baby §
§ Oh yeah, yeah, oh yeah... §
Oh shit! Let's hit the club!
Oh, hell yeah!
Oh, shit man, how much cheese is this?
This little bag, right?
That's for y'all surgery.
Y'all can get all hooked up and shit, you know what I'm saying?
But this big bag though...
that's for y'all to have a new life.
Mainly you, Brisc.
You know, when I was young,
you used to always look out for me, homie, always.
I'm a nigga, man. You know what I'm saying?
Shit! Without you...
I wouldn't be the boss I am today.
- lsn't that right? - Hell yeah.
He always said you kept it real, man, looked out for him.
lt's my time to return the favor, dawg.
Thanks, dawg.
You're my nigga, man. Keep going strong.
You hear me?
Now get the hell out of here, man.
- Don't look back either, homie. - And take Hay Butt with y'all.
Y'all get you something like that when you go wherever you go.
Yeah.
Well, you just bring bad luck to yourself.
See, this is exactly what I'm talking 'bout.
Ex-ac-tly!
You let some of them little young-ass hoodlums
rent your property
and the next thing you know, you pullin' down police tape.
You ain't never lie.
You damn right I ain't lying.
That the same thing happened other day on 55th and Central.
What?
The other day, at 55th and Central.
Lijah, what the fuck do you be saying?
The other day at Fifty-"fithe" and Central.
Oh, shit!
Could you help me up and shut the fuck up before you say anything?
- Oh, motherfucker! - Where is my cane?
Do you want to just die?
Help me up! All right, nigga.
I got it, nigga.
Oh, Superman strong now.
- My cane. - I can't get that motherfucker.
Sure, get it later.
Lijah, why can nobody understand what the hell you be saying?
Everybody understand me just fine.
You just don't listen! And that's your problem.
Oh, I listen!
But it sounds like you got shit and shoestrings all over your mouth.
Listen!
Listen for what?
I already know everything!
Only thing somebody could tell me
is some shit I already know.
Well, Lonnie, I swear for God,
you crazy enough to be a maniac.
Now, the man can't listen,
and the man don't know what he doing.
And the man who don't know what he doing,
and the man is going be his own demise and the Bible said that!
- Bible said what? - What I just said!
Listen.
Listen for what? I can't understand your old ass.
You old too.
I'm 23 days younger than your ass.
You ignorant, too.
Lijah, I ain't thinking about your ass.
Yes, you are.
You're a crazy fool.
( laughing )
Boy, you know you love me.
Lijah, you can go pee blood on the side of that tree for all I care.
You're the one with the bad kidney.
Fuck you, Lijah.
Yeah, okay, well, you know what?
Lonnie, you seem to talk a whole lot of shit.
Oh, you got up?
Yeah, I walk.
Sometimes I really think you think you can get some of this!
Get some of what? There ain't shit there!
You're certainly like a vulture. Come get the meat, nigga.
What's the matter with you?
You are too old to be trying to fight a motherfucker.
You trying to give me a case.
Now, that was amusing.
Now, I told you damn reporters stay from around here.
They came and got that boy out of here a long time ago.
Now you...
you and your ugly-ass cameraman turn around,
- and get the hell off my property. - Tell 'em.
That's what we're trying to do.
The boy went out with his own family--
you need to do your family and friends.
Can't do that.
First I have to find who is responsible for all this.
Oh, hell no! Hell no!
You mean to tell me that you understand what he's saying?
Perfectly.
Listen!
Get the hell off my property and take this crazy-ass fool with you.
Sorry, sweetie. lt ain't that easy.
Oh, I see. I'm gonna have to go get my pistol.
- What they doin'? - I don't know.
Does this look like a pistol?
Run, Lijah.
Damn! You too stupid to run!
Lonnie, I ain't gonna put no pressure on my back leg.
Shit, I'd rather get shot than let this bunion swell up on me again.
We just need to ask some questions about your tenants and his friends.
A snitch? No problem.
Lonnie, don't you dare snitch on them boys.
Look here, Lijah. I give a damn about being a snitch.
We ain't in prison.
And if we was, I sure would cut your ass.
There you go, there you go, trying to be an old-ass gangster!
Boys!
I'm sorry, sweetie. What is it that you need?
Where are they?
That I couldn't tell you. I don't know.
What can you tell me?
I know they left. They left everything--
checkbook, wallet and all.
Where can a man go with no money, l.D. or nothing?
Maybe he has a friend who has money.
That bunch?
They couldn't put enough together to buy a pack of ketchup.
And I guarantee that's two dollars more than your ass got.
Shut your ass up before I push you.
Maybe he asked other friends that might be able to give him money.
So he can live for a while.
Oh, that I couldn't tell you.
Ahh, yeah! There is this one guy who lives uptown.
He'd be partying with them celebrities, a lot of them sports stars,
and all them other assholes.
They got a lot of money-- they don't know what to do with it.
What'd they call him? Uh...
Damn! What'd they call him?
He's a ghetto superstar. Ghetto superstar.
How do you know this?
My nephew told me. He around their age.
- And they are friends? - No, they just talk.
But?
But when he was younger, Brisco used to take care of him.
Will you stay your ass still-- you're makin' me nervous.
ls this them?
That's all of them.
And where does this ghetto superstar live?
You go all the way down Main until it ends,
you make a left, and it's right there.
My Aunt Mabel used to own the house next door.
Your Aunt MabeI's a ho.
You hater.
Well, thank you, gentlemen.
That's it. Have a nice day.
What would your old ass do with that?
I'd do some tricks. Boy, I'd flip.
Boy-- boy, you don't know me!
You don't know me.
Not like I knew your mama.
- Snitch! - Fuck you.
Fuck you!
I was saving your life.
Get my cane.
Why did I bring this old motherfucker?
Get these fucking directions right.
Men, we got cheese, a bomb-ass ride.
Homie, let's stop by the club and get some honies or something.
Hay Love, your life is in danger, and all you can think about is the club?
- Man, I said honies t-- - We need to keep moving.
You right, let's just stop by the mall get the new joints that just come out.
Man, we ain't going to no club, we ain't picking up no ladies
and damn sure ain't going to no motherfuckin' mall.
Hay Love, you really need to shut up. lt's your fault we in this shit.
- My fault? - Both: Hell yeah!
Man, y'all was the ones in the garage smoking weed with him.
He didn't die from too much weed.
He died 'cause you put a bullet in his head!
- Fuck you, Pedro! - Huh?
Trying to make me sound like Dirty Harry or somebody.
We wanted some weed, he had the weed.
He smoked the weed, y'all smoked the weed.
I smoked the weed, and because I was high off the weed,
I accidentally split his wig.
But, if y'all want to blame me, fine.
I still think, obvious, it was the weed.
( water splashes )
I hope you don't mind,
the water looks so inviting.
Besides, I didn't want to wake you.
lt's all good, baby. Handle your business.
lt's your bad ass.
Well, you're pretty calm.
I mean, for a man who has a gun pointed at his head.
You must have had something like this happen to you at one time or another.
I've been there before. lt ain't shit.
Well good,
'cause I love a man who can handle his shit under pressure.
I'm glad you dig it.
I'll dig you too, shit!
You look real calm, cool, and collective.
Extremely casual for a motherfucker about to smoke a nigga.
You like it?
Fuck, I love it. Shit.
Well, I'm glad you like it, but...
who said anything about killing?
Why don't we just cut through the bullshit?
I know why you're here, man. I don't know where the homies at.
Shit.
And if I did, I wouldn't tell you shit any motherfucking way.
So why don't you just grab your motherfuckin' monkey
and get the fuck out of my motherfucking house.
I don't know shit and I wouldn't tell you shit anyway.
Why don't you just shoot me. But do something, shit.
Power tool time.
Baby, are you sure there's no other way?
'Cause I really hate working like this-- making a big mess and everything.
Fuck you! And fuck you, too!
Get to drilling.
Damn, I hate these tough guys.
Well, well, well.
Somebody has outlived their usefulness.
You don't know what the fuck that is.
That can be my cousin's address, you crazy psycho bitch!
Fuckin' bitch.
Well, I guess I'm gonna have to check it out anyway.
You're not gonna tell me shit!
Baby, let him finish his nap.
( hip-hop music plays )
§ Whenever my peeps is near, you need the streets clear §
§ lf the heat's a feature premiere an event you can't see with a mirror §
§ The shots is a maximum medium rare that can last a leap year §
§ Clap and magazines in the air on the news stands §
§ After we massacre we easily here punching the trapezoid in the square §
§ The black square isn't fair lookin' like you the Cracker Jack man §
§ A politician in raggedy pants a faggot and bastard, the man §
§ No friend of mine since the beginning of time §
§ Tried to cross me like a finishing line §
§ And I remembered the night ya disassembled ya physical kind §
§ The flat line is an invisible sign niggas is not willing to die §
§ Fuck you and the motherfuckers under you §
§ I got niggas that wanna crush the little son... §
( flatulence )
( urinating )
- Hey, what's happening? - What's up, man?
How the hell did we end up in this shit, man?
I've been asking myself that same question.
I hate to say it, but, Hay Love was right.
The weed.
You know I was thinking the same thing?
But to actually say Hay Love is right out loud--
- Keep that shit to yourself. - Yeah.
Hey, man, I'm hungry.
Man, I'm starving.
For real.
Where is Hay Love?
He went over there behind that bush.
Behind what bush? I don't see him.
Yeah, me neither.
You think something wrong?
I don't know.
Hay Love!
Oh shit.
Hay Love!
What?!
What the fuck are you doing?
Handling my business.
- What business? - ( flatulence )
- Damn, man! - Man, you better hurry up.
Why you want to rush nature?
You better hurry up before we leave yo'ass.
Man, y'all messing with my shit time!
This ain't healthy.
Shit!
Man, you've been fucking around. Let's go!
- Wait! - Wha--wha--what?!
What the fuck is wrong, Brisco?
How did you wipe your ass?
Brisco, stop!
How?
Man, I don't think that's really any of your business.
Homie, that's a legitimate question.
I'd like to know that myself.
Okay, that's three of us against one. How?
I was gonna take care of it next time we stopped.
- Oh, man! - Nasy ass!
- Nasy! - That's foul, homie. That's foul!
- You ain't riding in the truck with us. - What do you want me to do?
You better get your ass in the back, you peanut-butter-butt motherfucker!
Man, it don't have to be like this!
Where are my keys?
Let's get the fuck out of here.
You nasy boo-boo ass.
- Damn. - lt smells like shit.
You're stupid.
This is it?
This is the address.
Man, let's get this shit over with.
You guys sure? Ain't no turning back after this.
- Yeah, yeah. - Let's do it, man.
( dogs barking )
They got dogs and shit over here?
How can I help you?
Oh, we're here for the-- the thing.
What damn thing?
Yeah, the-- the surgery. The surgery!
Plastic surgery?
Oh, yeah, yeah. I thought it was supposed to be like secret shit--
I mean, yeah, plastic surgery.
Well, get your damn dick out of your mouth and speak up, boy!
Okay. Who's first?
( laughs )
Whoa, Rufus just fucking with you!
I'll be right back.
Let me get my boy out of the tub, get him dressed.
Y'all go and chill.
Man, what the fuck was that?
Homeboy one of them Cajuns.
I don't care what he is,
as long as we get done with this sick-ass weird-ass shit.
- Did he just have on drawers? - Man, hell yeah, he did!
Shit!
Boy, sit your ass down.
We got company.
And you better well damn behave, boy.
Yes, papa.
This here, this is my boy Benny.
He got his head fucked up at one of a them big monster truck accidents.
He ran out on the dirt track when this motherfuckin' big monster truck,
his favorite one, won the competition.
He ran out, slipped on the mud,
and got ran over by one of them big ass tires.
And then, the exhaust from the truck burned his face off.
- I'm retarded. - Boy, you're not retarded.
Your head just got smashed and your face is burnt.
But you're not retarded. Now you shut up!
Yes, papa.
Anyway, doctor said he got the mind of like a...
four, five year old, some shit like that.
But he's dumber than a motherfucker,
so I think it's more like a two or three, huh?
- Now, who got the money? - Oh, yeah, here you go.
There you go.
I hope it's all there 'cause I'll kill if it ain't.
lt's-- no, it's there.
I'm serious. Don't make me kill you all over some dumb shit.
- Man, the money there. - Sir, we don't want no problem.
Shut up before I pull your panties down, boy.
- What? - Panties man, like a girl?
Sir, we got no problem counting the money right here in front of you.
Look here, little Latin boy, I just said shut up, didn't l?
And that goes for you, you little señorita.
I know all the money is there, 'cause if it wasn't,
I'd shoot y'all in the head with a shit-stained bullet.
Can I see your panties?
- All right, sir. - Call me Rufus, pretty eyes.
Rufus, we're just going-- if you don't mind,
just give us the address and we'll head to the spot
where we are getting the surgery at.
What's your rush? Y'all just got here in my little establishment.
Y'all go on and chill and have a drink a little, some lemonade.
Oh, no, no-- we got to-- man, yeah, we got to run.
We got to get there.
What color are your panties? They're pink, aren't they?
Hey, Brisco we got to run.
Yeah, he's right, sir. We really got to get going.
Yeah, no disrespect, sir.
- Yeah, we sorry! - You hear that, Benny?
- They too good for us. - Oh, no, it ain't like that.
We got some big shots here, Benny.
Big shots, papa.
I can't believe y'all going to come into my establishment,
and treat me like this in front of my boy?
This right here, now this is my baby boy.
And he know-- he definitely know--
when someone treatin' his damn papa
like a piece of shit, like a jerk or something.
- Sir, I swear it ain't like that. - Big shot, huh?
This right here, this is my big shot killer.
You know what? I think we will have that lemonade.
Now, y'all sure? 'Cause I don't want to impose on you now,
if you got to go, boy, y'all got to go, huh?
- No, no, no. - We got some time on our hands.
Benny, let's go get our pretty little friends some lemonade, huh?
Yes, papa.
Excuse me, pink panties.
So you Cajun or something?
Motherfucker. You wanna squeal like a pig?
- Ahh! - Benny, what's going on in there?
Excuse me.
Man, they gay Cajuns.
Next time that motherfucker say I got on panties or something,
I'm gonna pick up something and I go buck wild on that--
J-Rob, be cool.
Man, let's just drink this lemonade and get the fuck out of here.
Man, maybe we should just use the hammer.
Probably be easier.
Rufus: Here's your lemonade.
Here you go right there.
There you go.
I ain't never seen no chunky-ass lemonade like this before.
Here's to my new pretty friends.
Ooh-wee! That's damn good.
How's yours, big fella?
Oh, yeah, mine is-- mine is real good.
Boy, you sure got some pretty eyes.
Okay. Hey, Rufus, you know what?
We gonna go ahead and roll out.
You know, we really need to get cracking on this one.
Looking at all you pretties, I almost forgot to ask.
Who got the card?
Oh, yeah, no problem.
I got the card, bro. Roll up out of here.
- Give him the card, Brisco. - Yeah, give him the card.
- Give him the card, bro. - What's wrong there?
I don't-- I don't have it.
- Oh, shit! - Wait, wait! Everybody calm down!
No, I gots to kill you. Benny, cover your ears.
Yes, papa.
- Wait! - Precious?
I'm sure your contact told you. Anybody who haven't that damn card,
I'm gonna have to kill you.
Unless, you don't have a contact,
and you're the undercover police there, huh?
Hey, we had it. And we ain't no police.
Sweetie, that don't matter.
My orders are to kill anybody who ain't got that damn card.
Cover your ears, Benny!
Brisco, where is the card?
I don't know, fuck! I must have lost it!
- What? - Where did see it last?
I don't-- the fucking desert!
Fuck, it must have fallen out!
That don't matter. You ain't got it now.
So I gots to kill you.
Benny, cover your ears!
Look, please, let us go get it.
No can do, boo boo.
lt's only 30 minutes up the road, man. Please!
- Well... - Please?
All right. You got one hour!
But two of you is got to stay.
- I'm going. - No-oo!
Pink panties stay.
My boy is taking a liking with you.
You stay! And you stay too, little señorita girl.
Take the stupid one!
Not you, Benny!
This stupid thing right here.
Now y'all got one hour!
Now, go on and get!
Pink panties!
§ Oh dizzam, me and my mizzan kickin da kidan... §
You go look over there. I'll look over here.
All right.
§ For sure me and my boys go on tour §
§ We gettin' dope pounds for niggas they hittin' in the whole town §
§ For niggas to smoke by the pound with bitches §
§ Yeah, yeah, we out on the west coast §
§ And tour down to Cali in awe like we da next to blow §
§ With new checks to the decimal, yeah, we keep it movin' and shit §
§ Open the shows to get in the groove wit the shit §
§ Come on, you can mash from Phoenix to Utah, the scenic performance... §
That looks a little peculiar.
Brand new truck parked on the side of the road and no one in it.
I think it's definitely worth checking out.
Okay, baby, you go that way, I'll go this way.
Did you find it?
No. Fuck, the wind could have blew it anywhere by now.
Oh, shit! I found it, dawg!
Cool! Let's get back before the Cajuns make the homies squeal like a pig!
- Oh shit! - No, no!
What should we do?
Every time we get past one test, here come another one.
What're we gonna do?
Ain't going out like that. He a man and I'm a man!
But he a bigger man!
- But it don't matter! - Hell, no, it don't!
I got to handle mine. I ain't no punk!
Handle yours! You ain't no punk!
- I've never been a punk! - Never!
- I got to handle mine. - Handle yours!
I done fuck some people up!
And I've seeing you fuck some people up!
- I got to handle mine. - Handle yours!
- I think I'm gonna fuck him up! - You gonna fuck him up?
I think I am.
- Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! - Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
- Yeah! - Yeah!
( shouting )
Oh my God! You all right?
Motherfucker, I'm hiccupping blood.
How many people you notice all right hiccup blood?
- What're we gonna do? - Well, I'm gonna run.
Oh my God. Oh, shit! She got a gun!
Let's get up out of here!
- Oh shit! - ( hiccupping )
That wasn't all of them. We gotta let them lead us to the rest.
Rufus: Sweet thing, y'all hungry?
- Hey, Pedro, he talking to you. - He's talking to you.
No, I'm talking to both of yous.
I'm cool.
My boy sure has taken a liking to you there, huh?
Yes, I like him papa. ( laughing )
( laughs ) That's my boy.
Y'all so ahead-- Rufus is hungry.
I go in there and make me a damn sandwich.
Man, what the fuck is taking them so long?
You think we must try to roll up out of here?
Papa! Papa, they gonna try roll up out of here.
- Hey, Benny, shh, shh. - Shut up, stupid.
- Rufus: What's going on out there? - Nothing, sir.
Can I see your panties?
I ain't got on no panties, you fucking idiot.
J-Rob, cool!
Now why he got to keep on saying I got on panties and shit?
I'm gonna beat his crazy ass.
Papa! Papa! Papa!
- What the sam hell going on out here? - Gonna get my ass beat.
Do I have to kill one of you so I can make my damn sandwich in peace?
- No, sir. - We sorry, man.
Benny, what's wrong?
Let me see your panties.
All right.
Nothing. I'm okay, Papa.
Let me see.
I ain't got on no panties. I got on man drawers, boy.
I'm going to call Papa. And this time, he will kill.
Jay, you need to show him something.
Fuck you, Pedro!
Show me something.
Show him you got on man drawers so he'll shut up about the panties.
You, you-- you do got on man drawers, right?
Hell yeah, I do.
I'm ain't about to pull down my pants and show this vegetable shit.
Show him the elastic or something, man.
ls this shit worth our life, or what? Come on!
Hmm?!
All right, man, shut up.
Oh! ( laughing )
- Man, this is some weird shit. - And where's Brisco?
We only got 15 minutes left.
- We need to think of a plan "B." - Like what?
I don't know, but we need to think of--
What the hell is he doing?
Boy, what the hell you doing? Stop that!
I said stop that!
- I love her! - Who? Who you love?
Pink panties.
What the hell y'all do to get my boy this riled up, huh?
- We didn't do nothing. - She showed me her panties!
What kind of freaky shit y'all got going up in here?
And without Rufus?
No, sir, you got it all wrong.
Oh, no. Good looking, y'all got it wrong.
And y'all one hour is up.
You sure?
I'm sure they'll be here any minute!
They're not here now, so you know what that means?
Y'all belong to good old Rufus.
- Oh fuck! - ( doorbell rings )
Both: Come in!
( footsteps approaching )
Oh, hell yeah!
- Here's the card. - Damn it.
Give me the address.
There you go, boy.
You're like a regular old superhero, huh?
Comin' to save the day at the last second.
- Benny! - Yes, papa.
Come on, it's time for your nap.
Goodbye forever, my love.
Damn, let's get as far as we can from this freak show.
Oh, I'm with that!
- Howdy boys. - Fuck.
You guys aren't being very cooperative in letting me kill you.
As a matter of fact, down right defiant.
But you know what, baby? That's okay, I forgive you.
We just need to make it right.
We need closure, baby.
Rufus: Whoo-wee!
Old Rufus has to kill somebody today, huh?
Well, well, well.
Don't you boys have more lives than a cat?
You boys go on and handle your business.
Old Rufus going to handle his business here.
Y'all go on, get.
Go on!
Boy, you's a big motherfucker.
( dogs barking )
I wonder what happened.
Man, shit, who cares? Man, let's go, let's go.
Shit!
Y'all ready?
As ready as we're ever gonna be.
Let's do it.
What are we supposed to do, call somebody?
Shit!
So, you don't wanna look like yourself anymore, huh?
I'm about to make that happen.
Don't look nervous now, fellas. The hard part's done.
Let me get this straight, Doc. You can make us look like anybody?
I can make you look different, or I can make you look like someone else.
- Exactly like somebody else? - Come on, exactly!
Oh, damn!
Make me look like that little faggot on Soul Train.
No, make me look like Billy D., the young one though.
Oh, hell, no! Denzel. Make me look like Denzel.
Wait, wait. Hold up.
ls it going to cost more to make him look like Denzel?
A whole lot more.
No, just make us look like somebody else.
Wait a minute. What celebriy can I look like for the cheapest?
- Spike Lee? - Never mind.
Rufus: Go on and get your asses in there!
Are these the ones you was telling me about, Rufus?
Yes siree, Bob.
Well, I got special plans for these two.
Ladies, take our patients in the back. Let's get them ready.
This is what I'm talking about.
This is the way Hay Love's supposed to be treated.
- Damn! - What's up, boys?
- Jay Rob? - Brisco?
Ah shit! Pedro?
What up?
Oh, look at this motherfucker.
Man, I'm about to get me a new driver's license,
social securiy card, and a credit card.
Then like Superman, my job here is done.
But if you ever need my services...
Thank you.
Hey, Doc, what happened to--
You mean those two that was chasing you?
Yeah.
Let's just say we made sure
no one's gonna be looking for you boys.
I threw in a couple of extra surgeries.
Wow.
( muffled talking )
You know these people, boss?
I do.
These are the guys
that killed my son.
( muffled screaming )
I remember that one being taller and this one being shorter,
but will never forget their faces.
- Take care of them. - Sure I will.
( muffled screaming )
( gunshot )
Where to now?
- lt doesn't matter. - Let's hit the club.
- § J Rob § - § Brisco §
- § Pedro § - § Damn! §
§ My bad §
§ Fucked around and... domed yo son §
§ You fucked up, nigga §
§ You gotta go, dog §
§ Get the fuck up outta here §
§ I done fucked around and put a hole in yo offspring §
§ And fled the scene before your body touched the ground §
§ I heard you wanna touch this now foo we way too deep §
§ And we'll weigh y'all busters down you see by any means §
§ We get away we got pleny greens and we life-long Henny friends §
§ Swig cognac and see the day go by and any team got a criminal wrap §
§ Krego try to figure out how we fit to lay but fly §
§ Arizona and Diego high and holla at the plastic doc §
§ I'm blocking out the past and I'm keeping me a plastic Glock §
§ I swear I'll be the last to drop I'm fast to pop §
§ lf I have to I'll blast a cop I'm taking ugly ground §
§ Change my whole life deep §
§ 'Cause surviving is the only fucking goal I see §
§ Why, what the fuck, bitch nigga, this is Compton! §
§ lf this world was mad §
§ I would place it at your feet §
- What's up, nigga? - What you doing back here, boy?
Fucking around singin'. You know I used to sing with the Pork Chops.
Hey, you know I was just in your garage?
- You know what I found, boy? - What'd you find?
- Ta-da! - Ooh!
- Hold this. - You know whose that is?
Just stand here and let me lean on ya.
Hey, that's your little nephew's.
Little bad ass.
Ooh-wee.
Thinkin' of the last time I got high, nigga.
You caught me with your wife.
Last time I got high,
you caught me with your momma.
But I'm gonna tell you what...
Why you gotta bring my momma-- you know my momma's been gone.
You said that like you won something.
You know my momma's been gone? You know my momma's been gone, no.
Stupid motherfucker, I ought to kick you down.
You know what else I found in your garage?
- This. - That a bitch.
- Who you gonna kick down? - You know I love you.
You know I love you, though. We always get into it and shit.
We always-- don't you fall with that motherfucker.
We always get into it. Love.
You know-- hold that for me, boy.
Boy, if I was a motherfucker--
if I was a motherfucker, you is the stupidest motherfucker right now.
- Let me tell you something. - What else you gonna tell me?
I'll slap you upside your motherfuckin' head, boy.
Benny: § Pink panties all day long §
§ I like 'em pink, I like 'em pink §
§ Big fat pink panties §
§ Pink panties all day §
§ Doo-doo-doo-doo, I love the pink... §
I Accidentally Domed Your Son
I Am Curious Blue
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