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Keeping Up Appearances 11 - Googley-Eyed Registrar

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( theme music playing )
* BADUM-BA-BUM-BUM BADUM-BA-BUM-BUM *
- * BABA-DA-BUM-BUM-- * - WHAT'S AMUSING YOU?
NOTHING.
YOU GOT RID OF THAT YOUNG MISSIONARY VERY QUICKLY.
NO PROBLEM. I SENT HIM NEXT DOOR.
TO HYACINTH? YOU DIDN'T.
IF ANYONE NEEDS A LITTLE CHRISTIAN MISSIONING IT'S HYACINTH.
I KNOW. BUT THINK OF THE POOR MISSIONARY.
( loud television audio playing )
( banging )
UH-OH, THE NATIVE DRUMS ARE BEATING.
I THINK YOUR FATHER'S THUMPING ON THE CEILING.
GO UP AND SEE WHAT HE WANTS, HUH, ROSE?
SOMEBODY ELSE GO.
I'M IN THE MIDDLE OF AN EYELASH.
IT LOOKS LIKE YOU GO, DAISY.
( banging )
I SHOULD GET A MOVE ON BEFORE HE DROPS IN ON US.
IT'S YOUR TURN NEXT TIME.
I'M EXPECTING A PHONE CALL.
YOU'RE GOT FALSE EYELASHES ON FOR A PHONE CALL?
WELL, I'VE GOT MY PRIDE.
( banging )
I'M DYING FOR A CIGARETTE, ONSLOW.
IS THIS NEW BOYFRIEND A SMOKER?
NO, HE'S A FITNESS FANATIC.
HE'S VERY MUSCULAR.
THEN SMOKE SOME MUESLIX.
I'M NOT FEEDING YOU ANY MORE CIGARETTES
TILL YOU GET A BOYFRIEND WHO SMOKES.
IT'S THE ONLY WAY I'LL EVER GET 'EM BACK.
HE WANTS ME TO STOP SMOKING.
I KNOW THE FEELING.
WHAT DID HE WANT?
WE'LL NEVER KNOW. HE JUST STARTED TELLING ME
AND HE FELL ASLEEP AGAIN.
I THINK IT'S ABOUT TIME I WAS ON MY WAY.
NOW, YOU MUSTN'T FEEL YOU'VE FAILED
BECAUSE I'VE REFUSED TO PURCHASE YOUR PAMPHLETS.
THIS IS, OF COURSE, ALREADY A CHRISTIAN HOUSEHOLD.
I HAVE NO QUARREL WITH ANYTHING YOU SAY,
IT'S MORE YOUR TENDENCY TO BRUSH AGAINST MY WALLS.
I WASN'T AWARE THAT I DID BRUSH AGAINST YOUR WALLS.
NOW, YOU'RE STILL VERY YOUNG
AND I QUITE UNDERSTAND THAT YOU LACK THE EXPERIENCE
TO REALIZE THAT WHEN THE LORD WANTS YOU TO VISIT HOUSES OF THIS CALIBER,
HE'LL EXPECT YOU TO WEAR SOMETHING
MORE CHRISTIAN IN THE WAY OF SOCKS.
- THEY'RE HARDLY HEATHEN. - HMM?
WELL, IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME?
IF, AS YOU INSIST,
ONLY A FEW OF US ARE GOING TO BE SAVED,
THEN SOCKS LIKE THAT MAY COUNT AGAINST YOU.
ONE MORE WORD OF ADVICE.
I'M SURE THE LORD WOULD HAVE NO OBJECTION
TO YOUR REMARKING ON THE QUALITY OF THE FURNISHINGS
YOU'RE SOMETIMES PRIVILEGED TO ENJOY.
MY QUEEN ANNE CORNER CABINET, FOR INSTANCE,
- IS AN EXACT REPLICA OF THE ONE IN SANDRINGHAM HOUSE. - OH, REALLY.
I WOULD ADVISE YOU TO TRY AND TAKE NOTICE OF THOSE THINGS.
THANK YOU. I'VE ONLY HAD TO REMOVE MY SHOES ONCE BEFORE.
- OH? - THAT WAS IN A MOSQUE.
AND THEN THE SERMON WAS SHORTER.
WHAT DOES THIS REMIND YOU OF, ONSLOW?
HARD LABOR.
DOESN'T IT REMIND YOU OF THOSE DAYS
WHEN WE USED TO WALK OUT TOGETHER, PUSHING THE PRAM?
YOU SHOULDN'T TALK LIKE THAT IN FRONT OF YOUR FATHER.
HE WON'T WANT TO BE REMINDED OF WHY WE HAD
TO BRING THE WEDDING FORWARD.
HE'S ASLEEP.
HE'S CRAFTY, HE'S NOT ALWAYS ASLEEP.
YOU USED TO LOOK LOVELY WITH THE PRAM,
THE BABY'S LITTLE FEET RESTING ON YOUR BEER BOTTLES.
WILL YOU STOP GETTING ALL SOFT AND DREAMY?
YOU'RE ALWAYS GOING ALL SOFT AND DREAMY.
THAT WAS THE MAIN REASON WE ENDED UP WITH THE PRAM IN THE FIRST PLACE.
I CAN'T REALLY STOP, HYACINTH.
OH, YOU'VE TIME FOR A COFFEE, DEAR.
IT'LL SETTLE YOUR NERVES.
THEY'RE NEVER BAD UNTIL I GET ROUND HERE.
DO SIT DOWN, ELIZABETH.
NO, NOT THERE, DEAR,
I LIKE TO FACE THE WINDOW.
- HOW'S EMMET? - OH, HE'S FINE.
STILL KEEPING BUSY
WITH HIS AMATEUR OPERATIC SOCIETY?
OH, YES, VERY BUSY.
DO REMIND HIM IF EVER HE NEEDS A VOICE IN AN EMERGENCY,
I SHALL BE VERY HAPPY TO OBLIGE.
THAT'S VERY KIND OF YOU, HYACINTH.
I'LL TELL HIM.
I WAS ALWAYS THE MUSICAL ONE IN THE FAMILY.
IF I HADN'T MARRIED RICHARD,
I THINK I MIGHT HAVE MADE IT MY CAREER.
SHERIDAN USED TO LOVE TO HEAR HIS MOMMY SING.
EVEN AS A TINY CHILD,
WHEN I SANG IT COULD REDUCE HIM TO TEARS.
I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.
IT WOULD UNNERVE SOME MOTHERS
HOW EXCEPTIONAL THAT BOY IS.
OBVIOUSLY DESTINED FOR HIGH PLACES.
I JUST THANK MY LUCKY STARS
THAT HE'S BLESSED WITH A MOTHER
WHO WILL BE WELL ABLE TO COPE WITH THE DEMANDS OF HIS FUTURE POSITIONING.
YOU KNOW ME, ELIZABETH,
I COULD HANDLE ALL HIS ENTERTAINING.
YES, I'M SURE YOU COULD, HYACINTH.
IT MUST BE A GREAT COMFORT TO HIM TO KNOW
THAT HOWEVER HIGH HE RISES,
I SHALL BE THERE BESIDE HIM,
READY TO TAKE THE SOCIAL STRAIN.
I'M PREPARED FOR IT, YOU SEE.
IT'S AS IF I'VE BEEN IN TRAINING ALL MY LIFE.
WHEN THE CALL COMES, I SHALL BE THERE.
I KNOW YOU PREFER A BEAKER, ELIZABETH.
YOU DO GET SO NERVOUS WITH MY COLLECTABLE CHINA.
YES I DO. I REALLY DO.
I DON'T KNOW WHY. IT NEVER HAPPENS ANYWHERE ELSE.
OH NO, I'M MUCH HAPPIER WITH A BEAKER.
( phone rings )
NOW-- YOU MUSTN'T GIVE IT ANOTHER THOUGHT, DEAR.
I'M NOT ONE TO MAKE A FUSS,
HOWEVER BADLY IT MARKS ANYTHING.
WON'T HEAR ME COMPLAIN.
WE WERE THINKING OF CHANGING THE RUG, ANYWAY.
THE "BOUQUET" RESIDENCE,
THE LADY OF THE HOUSE SPEAKING.
OH, IT'S YOU, VIOLET.
IT'S MY SISTER VIOLET, YOU REMEMBER?
THE ONE WITH THE LARGE HOUSE, SAUNA, AND ROOM FOR A PONY.
I REMEMBER.
I'M JUST TALKING TO ELIZABETH.
YOU REMEMBER, THE ONE WHO SPILLS THE COFFEE?
YOU SOUND EXCITABLE, VIOLET.
DON'T TELL MY YOU'VE SCRATCHED THE MERCEDES AGAIN?
OH, IT'S NOT THE MERCEDES, IT'S BRUCE.
WELL, HOW LONG HAS HE BEEN UP A TREE?
OH, BOYS ARE ALWAYS CLIMBING TREES.
YES, I KNOW HE'S 53, BUT THEY NEVER REALLY GROW UP.
I ONCE CAUGHT RICHARD PLAYING WITH A FRISBEE.
HE SAYS IT WAS ONE HE'D FOUND
BUT I'VE NEVER BEEN SURE.
SOMETIMES, ON SLEEPLESS NIGHTS
WHEN MY HEAD'S SWIMMING WITH THE RESPONSIBILITIES
OF ORGANIZING ANOTHER CANDLELIGHT SUPPER--
SOMETIMES I WONDER,
DID HE BUY THE FRISBEE?
NOW, CALM DOWN, VIOLET.
HAVE YOU ASKED HIM WHY HE'S SULKING UP A TREE?
HE WANTS TO WEAR YOUR EVENING DRESS?
UP A TREE?
OH, HE DOESN'T WANT TO WEAR IT UP A TREE.
HE WANTS TO GO TO A DANCE IN IT.
I'LL BE WITH YOU IN A MINUTE, ELIZABETH.
IF YOU TAKE MY ADVICE, YOU'LL KEEP HIM UP A TREE!
HOW MUCH LONGER ARE YOU GOING TO BE?
FATHER WANTS TO GO INTO TOWN.
DON'T HASSLE ME WHEN I'M WORKING.
HOW MUCH HAVE YOU LOST?
I HATE THE WAY YOU SAY THAT.
I'M STRUGGLING HERE, TRYING TO EARN
A DECENT LIVING FOR YOU AND YOUR FATHER--
AND KEEP YOUR ROSE IN CIGARETTES.
WILL YOU GET A MOVE ON? IT'S COLD OUT THERE
AND FATHER'S GETTING RESTLESS.
YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'VE DONE NOW, DON'T YOU?
YOU'VE RUINED THE ESSENTIAL CONCENTRATION.
YOU'VE UPSET THAT DELICATE BALANCE
BETWEEN THE STUDY OF FORM AND INSTINCT.
HE WANTS TO GO INTO TOWN.
HE'S IN A HURRY FOR SOMETHING.
OH, NICE.
I TOLD YOU HE WAS IN A HURRY.
RICHARD, DON'T TELL ME YOU'RE BUSY,
THIS IS AN EMERGENCY.
HELP YOURSELF TO A BISCUIT, ELIZABETH!
I WANT YOU TO COME HOME AND TAKE ME TO VIOLET'S.
WELL, CAN'T YOU MAKE SOME EXCUSE TO THEM?
IT ISN'T AS IF I DEMAND MUCH FROM YOU, RICHARD.
NO, I CAN'T SPEAK ANY LOUDER,
IT'S VERY EMBARRASSING.
IT'S BRUCE ON THE LOOSE AGAIN.
WHAT'S THE PROBLEM WITH BRUCE NOW?
( laughs ) NO, I'M SORRY, HYACINTH,
FOR A MOMENT, I THOUGHT YOU SAID THAT BRUCE WAS UP A TREE.
OH, HE IS UP A TREE.
WELL, WHAT'S HE DOING UP A TREE?
IS HE STUCK? IF HE'S STUCK, YOU REALLY WANT THE FIRE SERVICE.
ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT.
ONLY, COULDN'T YOU ASK ONSLOW TO GO AND GET HIM DOWN?
ONSLOW WON'T BE IN A MEETING.
IT'S NO GOOD SAYING THAT IT'S IMPOSSIBLE
TO MIX BRUCE AND ONSLOW SOCIALLY.
THEY CAN MANAGE FOR THE TIME IT TAKES TO GET DOWN FROM A TREE.
ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT.
I'LL GET AWAY AS QUICKLY AS I CAN.
I THOUGHT I WAS SPEAKING IN A COOPERATIVE TONE.
I ASSURE YOU, HYACINTH, IT WAS MEANT TO BE A COOPERATIVE TONE.
YES, I'LL GET AWAY AS QUICKLY AS I CAN--
IN A COOPERATIVE TONE.
GOODBYE.
UH, SORRY. A SPOT OF FAMILY TROUBLE.
( muttering ) OH, IT'S UNHEARD OF.
IT'D TRY THE PATIENCE OF A SAINT, WHAT I GO THROUGH.
RICHARD DOESN'T CARE AT ALL... ( muttering continuing )
IS ANYTHING WRONG?
OH, ELIZABETH.
( laughs ) NO, NO, EVERYTHING'S FINE.
FINISHED ALREADY, DEAR?
APPARENTLY.
OH, I'LL MAKE YOU ANOTHER ONE, DEAR.
THIS AFTERNOON WHEN I'VE GOT A LITTLE MORE TIME.
- I'VE GOT TO, REALLY... - OH, WELL.
- ESCAPE FROM THIS CRISIS WITH THE FAMILY. - WELL, I MUST BE GOING.
OH, NO. SURELY NOT, DEAR.
NO, NO.
NOT THROUGH THE BACK DOOR, DEAR.
NO, GOOD GRACIOUS ME,
WHATEVER KIND OF A FRIEND WOULD I BE
TO SEND YOU CREEPING OUT THROUGH THE BACK DOOR?
NO. YOU MUST USE THE FRONT, DEAR.
I DON'T MIND THE BACK DOOR, HYACINTH.
BUT I DO, DEAR, FOR MY FRIENDS.
THANK YOU FOR MY COFFEE, HYACINTH.
OH, NOT AT ALL, DEAR. IT'S JUST A PITY YOU'RE IN A RUSH.
DO LOOK AT THE TULIPS ON YOUR WAY OUT, DEAR.
COME TO THINK OF IT, THE TULIPS IN THE BACK GARDEN ARE FAR SUPERIOR.
THEY'RE DARWIN, YOU KNOW, SHERIDAN'S FAVORITE.
OH REALLY?
NOW TAKE YOUR TIME!
SHERIDAN TALKS TO THEM FOR HOURS!
WELL, GO ON, RING THE BELL.
SHE'S YOUR SISTER, YOU TELL HER.
IT'S YOUR FAULT WE LOST HIM. YOU TELL HER.
HOW COME IT WAS MY FAULT?
YOU'RE THE ONE THAT LEFT HIM IN THE STREET.
BECAUSE I HAD TO GO INTO THE BOOKIE'S LOOKING FOR YOU!
I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE PANICKING FOR, ANYWAY.
BECAUSE I'VE LOST MY FATHER. THAT'S WHY.
NO NEED TEARING UP. SOMEBODY'LL FIND HIM.
I MEAN WHO THE HELL'S GONNA KEEP YOUR FATHER?
DAISY, ONSLOW, HOW NICE TO SEE YOU.
WHAT A LOVELY SURPRISE.
ONSLOW, YOU MUST BE FREEZING IN JUST THAT VEST.
PUT THIS ON. NO, COME ON.
WE CAN'T HAVE YOUR TATTOOS EXPOSED... TO THE ELEMENTS.
I'M BOILING.
NO, NO, LOOK AT YOU.
YOU'RE A MASS OF GOOSE-PIMPLES.
NOW WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH AN EMPTY WHEELCHAIR?
FUNNY YOU SHOULD SAY THAT.
SO IT'S CLEAR THAT THE WEIGHT OF OPINION HERE
IS IN FAVOR OF SCHEME "B."
I'LL GO ALONG WITH THAT.
OBVIOUSLY WHAT WE HAVE TO DO
IS START GATHERING AS MUCH SUPPORT AS POSSIBLE.
( phone rings )
- WOULD YOU TAKE THAT? - YEAH.
THE OTHER SCHEME HAS ITS SUPPORTERS.
WE'VE GOT A FIGHT ON OUR HANDS.
- WELL, ONE THING-- - AH, IT'S FOR RICHARD.
OH, EXCUSE ME.
IT'S YOUR WIFE AGAIN.
WHAT IS IT, HYACINTH? I SAID THAT I'D GET AWAY AS QUICKLY AS I CAN.
OH, IT'S NOT BRUCE THIS TIME, THEN WHAT IS IT?
WHY WOULD THEY ARRIVE WITH AN EMPTY WHEELCHAIR?
OH, I SEE.
DOES THIS CANCEL PREVIOUS INSTRUCTIONS?
RIGHT, I'LL SEE YOU AT HOME.
WHAT--
I'M SORRY IF I DIDN'T SAY GOODBYE PROPERLY LAST TIME.
I DIDN'T INTEND
NOT TO SAY GOODBYE PROPERLY.
GOODBYE!
SORRY. ANOTHER SPOT OF FAMILY TROUBLE.
WELL, WHERE WOULD MY DADDY HAVE GONE?
DON'T ASK ME. I CAN'T POSSIBLY THINK IN THIS JACKET.
YOU CAN SEE YOUR FACE IN THIS SINK--
UNFORTUNATELY.
I THINK IT'S TERRIBLY CARELESS OF YOU TO LOSE DADDY.
NOBODY'S PERFECT.
YOU CAN'T KEEP THEM IN IF THEY WANT TO ROAM.
WE HAD A BULL-TERRIER THAT WAS JUST THE SAME.
I DON'T THINK I CARE FOR THAT COMPARISON, ONSLOW.
IT CURED HIM WHEN WE HAD HIM DOCTORED.
OR THAT ONE.
WE HAD TO STOP HIM BITING THE POST WOMAN.
NOW, WHAT CONDITION WAS DADDY IN WHEN YOU LOST HIM?
ASLEEP. I GAVE HIM ONE OF HIS PILLS.
YOU DID? SO DID I.
- YOU DIDN'T?! - OH, NO WONDER HE WAS ASLEEP.
POOR DADDY. LOST IN HIS SLEEP.
IN BETWEEN GOING TO SLEEP
HE'S BEEN A BIT EXCITABLE ALL MORNING.
I THINK HE HAD TOO MUCH EXCITEMENT LAST NIGHT
AT THE SENIOR CITIZENS' CLUB.
WHAT KIND OF EXCITEMENT?
IS IT PROPER AT DADDY'S AGE TO BE HAVING EXCITEMENT?
ALL I CAN SAY IS, HE CAME HOME WITH A SMILE ON HIS FACE
A LOT LIKE WE USED TO SEE ON OUR BULL-TERRIER.
WELL, I THINK WE OUGHT TO FIND OUT
IF THE SENIOR CITIZENS' CLUB HAVE ANY IDEA WHERE HE IS.
THOSE BISCUITS ALONE!
REGISTRY OFFICE?!
WELL, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK HE'S HEADING FOR THE REGISTRY OFFICE?
WELL, SHOULD HE BE PROPOSING
AT THE SENIOR CITIZENS' CLUB?
I THOUGHT ALL THEY DID WAS TO PLAY BINGO.
YES, YES, AS SOON AS I CAN.
I THINK I'D BETTER, EH--
YES, I THINK YOU'D BETTER, RICHARD.
ANOTHER SPOT OF--
All: FAMILY TROUBLE?
ARE YOU GOING INTO TOWN?
COULD YOU GIVE ME A LIFT? IT'S RATHER URGENT.
YES, ON BOTH COUNTS.
OH, GOOD. THANK YOU.
YOU SAID, "YES."
I DON'T BELIEVE IT!
YOU SAID, "YES." WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY NO?
YOU CAN'T SAY NO.
YOU CAN, REALLY. I'VE DONE IT.
AND LOOK WHERE YOU FINISHED UP-- DIVORCED.
I'LL JUST PARK AROUND THE FRONT.
IF YOU GIVE HER A LIFT, SHE'LL SING AT ME.
SHE WON'T SING AT YOU.
SHE'S IN SOME KIND OF PANIC.
I'LL GO TO THE REGISTRY OFFICE. YOU FOLLOW WITH THE WHEELCHAIR.
CAN I TAKE THE JACKET OFF, NOW?
NO!
SHE GETS OUT IF SHE SINGS AT ME.
WHERE TO, HYACINTH?
OH, JUST TO TOWN, DEAR.
A LITTLE PERSONAL BUSINESS I WON'T BOTHER YOU WITH.
OH, ISN'T THAT RICHARD OUTSIDE THE REGISTRY OFFICE?
NO, I SHOULDN'T THINK SO.
WHAT ON EARTH WOULD RICHARD BE DOING OUTSIDE THE REGISTRY OFFICE?
- YES IT IS. IT'S RICHARD. - HMM?
OH, SO IT IS!
OH, I EXPECT HE'S HERE ON COUNCIL BUSINESS.
ORGANIZING SOMETHING.
YOU MIGHT AS WELL PUT ME DOWN HERE, ELIZABETH.
THANK YOU, LIZ.
THERE YOU ARE. YOU SEE, SHE DIDN'T SING AT YOU.
I COULD FEEL HER WANTING TO.
ALL THE WHILE SHE WAS IN THE CAR I COULD FEEL HER SUPRESSING IT.
WE OUGHT TO PLAN THIS A LITTLE. LET'S NOT GO IN BALD-HEADED.
I DON'T THINK I CARE FOR YOUR ATTITUDE, RICHARD.
YOU'VE NO BUSINESS TO BE SO CALM
WHEN SOME UNSCRUPULOUS FEMALE IS
MANEUVERING DADDY TO THE STEPS OF THE ALTAR.
AHHH!
OH, CAN YOU GIVE ME A HAND WITH HIM?
MADAM, I WILL NOT LIFT A FINGER
TO ASSIST YOU TOWARDS MATRIMONY WITH THIS MAN.
- HE'S IN NO FIT CONDITION-- - NOW, NOW, LET'S NOT GET EXCITED.
- I THINK HE'S JUST ASLEEP. - YOU OUGHT TO BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF,
FORCING DADDY INTO MARRIAGE, WHEN YOU CAN SEE
HOW UNINTERESTED HE IS IN THE DEMANDS OF THE FLESH.
WHAT IS SHE TALKING ABOUT?
IF IT'S ALL THE SAME, I OUGHT TO GET BACK. I HAD TO LEAVE A MEETING.
BUT YOU CAN'T GO NOW, RICHARD.
I WANT YOU TO PREFER CHARGES AGAINST THIS WOMAN.
- ON WHAT GROUNDS? - KIDNAPPING.
IF I HADN'T ARRIVED IN THE NICK OF TIME,
YOU WOULD'VE WHIPPED HIM AWAY INTO WEDLOCK.
OH, WHAT'S THE WOMAN TALKING ABOUT?
MADAM, I AM THE REGISTRAR.
I LIKE YOU IN THE JACKET, ONSLOW.
WHAT, THIS JACKET?
ANY JACKET.
SMART.
YOU'RE GOING BROODY AGAIN.
YOU USED TO WEAR A JACKET WHEN WE WERE COURTING.
EVERYONE WORE A JACKET IN THOSE DAYS.
EVEN THE SCRUFFS WORE JACKETS.
THAT'S HOW YOU COULD TELL THEY WERE SCRUFFS,
THEY HAD HOLES IN THEIR JACKETS.
THESE DAYS--
WELL, YOU CAN'T TELL WHO'S A SCRUFF.
OUR HYACINTH CAN TELL.
IF YOU WERE MARRIED TO OUR HYACINTH,
YOU'D ALWAYS WEAR A JACKET.
IF I WAS MARRIED TO YOUR HYACINTH, I'D BE WEARING EARPLUGS.
( mumbling )
OH, THANK GOODNESS. JUST IN TIME.
IS HE MARRIED?
OF COURSE HE'S NOT MARRIED.
HE WAS ASLEEP.
PROBABLY SAVING HIMSELF FOR THE HONEYMOON.
( laughs )
WE CAN DO WITHOUT REMARKS LIKE THAT, THANK YOU, ONSLOW.
WHAT WAS SHE LIKE?
- WHAT WAS WHO LIKE? - THE BRIDE-TO-BE.
SHE NEVER TURNED UP.
THAT'S A BIT CASUAL, MISSING YOUR WEDDING DAY.
WHEEL THE CHAIR, WILL YOU, ONSLOW?
I OUGHT TO GIVE ONSLOW A HAND,
TAKE A TURN WITH THE WHEELCHAIR.
RICHARD, DON'T GET TOO CLOSE.
I KNOW THEY'RE MY FAMILY, AND YOU KNOW I LOVE THEM DEARLY,
BUT JUST IN CASE ANY FRIENDS ARE PASSING
I'D LIKE JUST TO KEEP THAT OUR LITTLE SECRET.
IT'S NICE TO KNOW THAT YOU LOVE THEM, ANYWAY.
KEEP YOUR VOICE DOWN, RICHARD.
( horn honks )
- OH, NO. - CAN WE GIVE YOU A LIFT, AGAIN?
OH, GREAT.
LET'S JUST GET YOUR FATHER OUT.
I WILL NOT HAVE ONSLOW
DRAPING DADDY OVER WALLS LIKE THIS.
DON'T MAKE A SCENE.
- IT SHOULD FIT IN THERE. - YEAH, IT'S ALL RIGHT.
IT'S VERY NICE OF YOU, LIZ.
- I DON'T BELIEVE YOU'VE MET ONSLOW AND DAISY. - NO, HOW DO YOU DO?
JUST LET'S GET INTO THE CAR.
- IT'S VERY NICE OF THEM TO GIVE US A LIFT. - BUT WHERE TO?
WE CAN'T LET THEM TAKE DADDY TO ONSLOW'S!
WE CAN'T LET LIZ AND EMMET SEE
HOW DAISY AND ONSLOW LIVE.
THERE ISN'T ROOM ENOUGH FOR ALL OF US.
ME AND DAISY WILL WALK.
THAT'S THE NICEST THING ONSLOW'S EVER SAID.
YOU CAN HAVE YOUR JACKET BACK NOW, DICKY.
NO! KEEP IT ON!
RICHARD WANTS YOU TO KEEP IT.
YES I DO. I'D LIKE YOU TO KEEP IT.
IT DOESN'T FIT.
YOU LOOK SMART IN IT.
DON'T LIE. SHE'S GOING BROODY AGAIN.
AH!
( laughing )
JUST GET YOUR FATHER IN THE CAR
AND LET ME GO BACK TO WORK!
HOW CAN YOU THINK OF GOING BACK TO WORK
WHEN ONSLOW'S THROWN DADDY OVER A WALL?
( engine starts )
I NEVER REALIZED YOUR FATHER HAD RUBBER SOLES.
HE'S ALWAYS HAD RUBBER SOLES.
NO WONDER HE KEEPS CATCHING MRS. FURGESON
WHEN SHE'S HANGING THE WASHING OUT.
HE'S A SOUND SLEEPER.
IT'S SIMPLY WEAR AND TEAR.
POOR DADDY HAD A GREAT MIND IN HIS DAY.
HE WAS MUCH RESPECTED IN MUSICAL CIRCLES.
I EXPECT THAT'S WHERE MY GIFT COMES FROM.
WHERE TO, HYACINTH?
WHERE TO, INDEED.
I OFTEN ASK THE SAME THING OF RICHARD.
"WHERE ARE WE GOING, RICHARD?" I ASK.
"WITHER ARE WE BOUND?"
WHAT DOES RICHARD SAY?
NOT A LOT REALLY.
I MEANT WHERE TO WITH YOUR FATHER, HYACINTH?
HMM?
WHERE DO YOU WANT HIM DROPPING OFF?
OH, DADDY?
TAKE THE FIRST RIGHT, HERE.
FIRST RIGHT? WHERE ARE WE GOING?
WE'LL TAKE HIM TO VIOLET'S.
IT'S A MORE APPROPRIATE HOUSE.
DAISY AND ONSLOW CAN PICK HIM UP LATER.
Hyacinth: THANK YOU, LIZ.
THAT WAS VERY KIND OF YOU.
OH, LOOK.
THERE'S BRUCE'S HUGE MERCEDES.
I'LL GET THE WHEELCHAIR OUT.
OH!
RICHARD, WOULD YOU--? OH.
- I'VE JUST THOUGHT OF SOMETHING. - UM?
SUPPOSING BRUCE IS STILL UP A TREE?
OH, MY GOODNESS. I'D FORGOTTEN THAT.
OH, PLEASE, DON'T LET BRUCE BE UP A TREE.
RICHARD,
WOULD YOU GET DADDY INTO THE WHEELCHAIR?
I'LL JUST LET VIOLET KNOW THAT WE'RE HERE. DON'T RUSH.
"Camptown Races")
...YOUR EVENING DRESS.
THIS IS MY BEST EVENING DRESS.
THAT'S WHY I WANT IT.
OH, WHY CAN'T YOU--
THERE'S NOTHING THE MATTER WITH ME!
UH! THERE!
- THAT'S DONE IT. - OH, WELL DONE.
IT'S HUMILIATING, BRUCE.
NICE CLOTHES.
Violet: BUT THEY'RE WOMEN'S CLOTHES.
THAT'S A SEXIST REMARK.
HE'S FALLING OUT.
NO, NOT REALLY, IT'S JUST AN IMPRESSION HE GIVES.
( panting )
I THOUGHT I HEARD A WILLOW WARBLER.
DID YOU HEAR A WILLOW WARBLER?
IT'S ONE OF MY ABSOLUTELY ALL-TIME
FAVORITE SONGSTERS.
IT'S A GREAT FAVORITE OF DADDY'S, TOO, WHEN HE'S AWAKE.
MY SISTER'S CLEARLY BUSY AND THERE'S NO ONE AT HOME.
SO THERE'S NOT MUCH POINT IN HANGING AROUND.
COME ON, LET'S GET DADDY INTO THE CAR.
THAT'S IT. THERE WE GO, SAFELY--
( tree falls )
- WHAT WAS THAT? - I TOLD YOU, IT'S A WILLOW WARBLER.
IT'S THE MATING SEASON.
NOW, WE MUST GET DADDY INTO THE CAR.
I'D FORGOTTEN IT WAS TUESDAY.
VIOLET'S ALWAYS BUSY ON TUESDAY.
SHE FINDS IT SO TIME CONSUMING BEING WEALTHY.
ESPECIALLY ON A TUESDAY.
DON'T HOLD DADDY IN THAT POSITION, RICHARD.
I THINK WHAT WE'LL DO IS TO TAKE DADDY IN THIS DIRECTION.
HE'S ALWAYS LIKED THIS DIRECTION.
( theme music playing )
K-19 - The Widowmaker CD1
K-19 - The Widowmaker CD2
K-911
K-Pax CD1
K-Pax CD2
Kabhi Kabhie (1976) CD1
Kabhi Kabhie (1976) CD2
Kadosh (1999)
Kaena The Prophecy Xena CD1
Kaena The Prophecy Xena CD2
Kafka
Kagemusha
Kaho Naa Pyaar Hai
Kahpe Bizans CD1
Kahpe Bizans CD2
Kairo (2001)
Kajmak In Marmelada (2003)
Kakashi
Kal Ho Naa Ho CD1
Kal Ho Naa Ho CD2
Kalifornia 1993
Kama Sutra A Tale of Love 1996
Kamchatka
Kanal
Kandahar
Kangaroo Jack
Kanto Wanderer 1963
Kanzo Sensei CD1
Kanzo Sensei CD2
Kaosu (Chaos)
Karakter (1997) CD1
Karakter (1997) CD2
Karan Arjun
Karate Kid 2 CD1
Karate Kid 2 CD2
Karate Kid 3
Karate Kid The
Karo (pulse)
Kasaba
Kasoor
Kate And Leopold
Kate and Leopold (2001)
Katzelmacher
Kavkazskaya plennitsa - Kidnapping Caucasian Style (Leonid Gaidai 1966)
Kaze No Katami - The Wind Carpet (Kamal Tabrizi 2003)
Kdo chce zabit Jessii
Kebabtomte
Keeping The Faith
Keeping Up Appearances 01 - My Name Is Bouqet
Keeping Up Appearances 02 - Welcoming The Dishy Vicar
Keeping Up Appearances 03 - Visiting Acquaintanance Stately
Keeping Up Appearances 05 - Daisy And Her Toy Boy
Keeping Up Appearances 06 - How To Manage Christening
Keeping Up Appearances 11 - Googley-Eyed Registrar
Keeping Up Appearances 12 - Coctails With Greek Millionaire
Keeping Up Appearances 13 - Unfortunate Prospect
Keeping Up Appearances 14 - Playthings For Daddy
Keeping Up Appearances 15 - Three Piece Suite
Keeping Up Appearances 16 - Picnic For Daddy
Keeping Up Appearances 17 - Very Merry Hyacinth
Keeping Up Appearances 18 - Sea Fever
Keeping Up Appearances 19 - Angel Gabriel Blue
Keeping Up Appearances 20 - Historical Pageant
Kees de jongen CD1
Kees de jongen CD2
Keetie Tippel
Kekec (Joze Gale 1951) CD1
Kekec (Joze Gale 1951) CD2
Kellys Heroes (1970)
Ken Park (2002)
Kenny Rogers - Live by Request
Kes
Kes (Ken Loach 1969)
Key Largo
Khakee CD1
Khakee CD2
Khakee CD3
Khartoum
Kid Stays in The Picture The
Kid The CD1
Kid The CD2
Kids Return 1996
Kids Return CD1
Kids Return CD2
Kiki delivery service
Kill Bill CD1
Kill Bill CD2
Kilometer Zero (2000)
King Boxer
King David
King In New York A 1957
King Is Alive The
King Kong vs Godzilla 2 (1962)
King The (2003) CD1
King The (2003) CD2
King of Comedy The (1983)
King of marvin gardens The
Kingpin
Kings Go Forth (Delmer Daves 1958)
Kinjite Forbidden Subjects (J Lee Thompson 1989)
Kiss Me Kate 1953
Kiss Me Stupid - Billy Wilder 1964
Kiss Of Death
Kiss of the Dragon
Kiss the Girls
Kitchen Stories
Kites Over Helsinki
Kitne Door Kitne Paas (1999)
Kjrlighetens Kjtere
Kletka
Klumps The
Klute 1971
Knafaim Shvurot
Knife In The Water 1962
Knight Rider 1x03
Knight Rider 1x04
Knight Rider 1x05
Knight Rider 1x06
Knight Rider 1x07
Knight Rider 1x08
Knight Rider 1x09
Knight Rider 1x10
Knight Rider 1x11
Knight Rider 1x12
Knights Of The Round Table
Knights Tale A
Knockabout
Knockin On Heavens Door
Koi mil Gaya (2003 Hindi)
Kolya
Koma
Kongekabale
Kopps
Kral Sokolu
Kronos
Krull 1983 CD1
Krull 1983 CD2
KrÓmpack
Kuch Naa Kaho 2003
Kukushka 2002
Kumokiri Nizaemon (1978) CD1
Kumokiri Nizaemon (1978) CD2
Kundun
Kung Fu Hustle 2004
Kushi 2003
Kuutamolla
Kwaidan
Kytice
Kyun Ho Gaya na