Download over 80'000'000 DVD movies!!!
Searh and Download Over 80 Million DVD Quality Movies!!!

Subtitles for Married With Children 1x04 - But I Didnt Shoot the Deputy.

English Subtitles for DivX Movies.


Select one of the letters to view a proper section of titles list:

# A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z



Married With Children 1x04 - But I Didnt Shoot the Deputy

Click here to download subtitles file for the movie "Married With Children 1x04 - But I Didnt Shoot the Deputy"

Click here to download the movie "Married With Children 1x04 - But I Didnt Shoot the Deputy"


Ads:

Subtitles : RaceMan www.forom.com
* Love and marriage *
* Love and marriage *
* Go together like *
* A horse and carriage *
* This I tell ya, brother *
* You can't have one *
* Without the other *
* Love and marriage *
* Love and marriage *
* It's an institute *
* You can't disparage *
* Ask the local gentry *
* And they will say It's elementary *
* Try, try, try To separate them *
* It's an illusion *
* Try, try, try And you will only come *
* To this conclusion *
* Love and marriage **
GAME SHOW HOST: And for $100, name the chief export of the United States.
Wheat.
WOMAN: Machinery.
Machinery is correct.
Now, which state produced the most U.S. presidents?
Illinois.
Virginia.
Virginia is correct.
Which side of the brain
controls analytical thinking?
The right.
The left.
The left is correct!
And we'll be right back after this brief commercial message.
MAN: Hey, America.
Who do you call when you don't want to cook?
Ahab's.
Ahab's is correct.
Yes. Ahab's for fish and fowl.
Yes, opening soon
in an economically depressed area near you.
[CAR APPROACHING]
Daddy's home. Come on.
Hi, honey. How was your day at the shoe store?
I'll tell you something, Peg.
Feet and the return of warm weather
sure makes for a deadly combination.
Well, you knew that going in, Al.
Yeah. My back is so tight.
I wish I had somebody to rub it.
Like a wife.
Hey, there's one now!
How about my back?
You know, Al, I work hard all day too.
Yeah? Doing what?
Ahh!
Ohh, that feels good.
How good?
Where are the kids?
Upstairs.
What if they come down?
I'll take care of that.
Bud, Kelly!
You want to come down and help me in the kitchen?
[DOORS SLAM]
There. That should buy us about 10 minutes.
Seven more than we'll need.
Where were we?
We're here, Bundy!
Bundy, Bundy, don't you know
you shouldn't leave your door unlocked?
It's an invitation to intruders.
What are they doing here?
They're the neighborhood watch. I invited them.
To watch this?!
Uh, hi, Peggy. Al.
I hope we're not interrupting anything.
Nah. Just gonna have a little sex with the wife.
What the heck. There's always next month.
Our house was robbed this afternoon.
Gee, that's too bad. You wanna hand me my shirt?
What did they steal?
Mostly small stuff.
Our radio, Marcie's earrings,
our cameras, our answering machine.
God only knows who called.
Well, at least they didn't take anything valuable.
Yeah, this time.
But I know how these vermin think.
They take your little crap,
then come back later with a truck for your big crap.
Not gonna happen in my house.
I'm ready for them.
I got 50,000 volts going through my window bars.
I got a bucket of battery acid hanging over the back door
and I got a .30-aught-6 rigged to the front doorknob.
How do you get into your house?
Wouldn't you like to know?
Now, the question before us is:
What are we gonna do about it?
I say we hunt the scum down,
and then we run them over with our cars.
Then we get out these fishhooks--
Marcie!
I'm sorry.
I don't know what came over me.
It's just that I feel violated.
Someone's been in my home, in my bedroom.
I feel so helpless.
We'd all feel helpless in your bedroom, Marce.
You got any more beer?
No.
And in all the excitement, I forgot to ask--
Why are you meeting in my house?
Because our wives didn't want you in ours.
Hi. Did I miss anything?
You want me back on my wife?
Not on my account.
I just wanted to say I'm sorry you got robbed.
It wasn't me. It was them!
Yeah, it was you.
Somebody smashed your car windshield,
stole your radio,
and wrote "wash me" on your hood.
My car! They stole my radio?
Hey, Bundy. The thieves have a point.
You really ought to wash your car.
Get out!
Out! Out!
Pretend there's a keg on the lawn.
Out! Out!
I can't believe they stole my radio
right in front of my house!
I know how you feel.
If you did, Steve, you wouldn't be touching me.
Maybe we should get more involved
with the neighborhood watch.
Look. You can't depend on anybody but yourself.
I've put this off long enough.
I'm buying a gun.
A gun is not the answer.
You can't curtail the criminal element
by sinking to their level.
Oh, excuse me, Miss Let's-run-them-over
and-get-out the-fishhooks.
I was upset. I wasn't thinking clearly.
Yes. She wasn't using the left,
or analytical, portion of the brain.
I'm definitely getting a gun.
And I'd advise you to do the same.
Now, come on. There's got to be a more humane way
to protect our home and possessions.
There is.
We'll get a dog. A good watch dog.
A dog. That's a great idea. I've got a dog.
Buck, look! Strangers in the house!
Kill them, Buck. Go kill them!
Whoa, big fella.
I don't mean a stupid dog.
I'm talking about a real dog.
A guard dog.
A Doberman.
Steve, first thing tomorrow,
we're going to one of those deadly doggy places.
Yes, Al, because we're against guns
and the violence they stand for.
That's right. A dog.
A vicious dog with sharp teeth
that will go through a jugular
like a hot knife cutting through butter on a warm, summer night--
Come along, dear.
So that the next guy who tries to get in my bedroom uninvited
will walk out on bloody stumps.
[DOG BARKS]
When was the last time you called
to complain about the dog?
Yesterday. But Marcie said to stop calling.
She said the ringing makes him bark.
Everything makes him bark.
Hey, Dad, it's been two weeks,
and you haven't even let me see the gun yet,
let alone pick off a pigeon or two.
Bud, guns are not toys. They are lethal weapons
and should only be handled by responsible adults.
When Dad was practicing his quick draws
at the TV during Donahue--
Bud, number one, shut up.
Number two, it was Phil's salute
to the Huge and Fat Women's Caucus.
Number three, there were no bullets in the gun.
Your mother took them out and hid them for safety reasons,
and she won't tell me where.
Guns, guns, guns.
Can't anyone talk about me for a change?
Okay, Kelly. Where were you last night?
So, Dad, what kind of gun did you buy?
[DOORBELL RINGS]
[DOG BARKS]
Coming!
Hi, Peg.
Borrow a cup of kibble?
We ran out, and the dog's still hungry.
What's the matter?
The neighbor's cat didn't fill him up?
That cat was taunting him, Al.
Gee, you two look cute.
I can't get Al to dress unisex at all.
This is protective gear.
You see, Bella still hasn't accepted us
as his rightful owners.
You named that dog after Bela Lugosi?
No. Abzug.
We thought it was kind of cute.
But he won't wear the hat.
Oh, listen Al, by the way,
we want to apologize about your fence.
What happened to my fence?
Bella ate through it.
Wow!
It was just a little piece.
Yeah, not much, really.
About the size of a human face.
Rhoades, what are we going to do about this?
Look, we'll handle this the same way
we dealt with the cat incident.
Get estimates, and we'll make it good.
Look, we know Bella can be loud and annoying,
and the whole neighborhood hates his guts,
but at least he's a good protector.
Gee, Mom, that's just what you say about Dad.
Mount up! They just hit the Johnsons.
TV and major appliances.
We're meeting at the Bowl and Brew
to calm ourselves down.
Ha! See that!
They didn't hit our place.
That's what a good dog will do for you.
Come on. Grab the meal and the mace.
It's time to feed our doggy.
[SNORING]
[GLASS BREAKS]
[SNORING]
Peg, did you hear that?
How could I hear anything the way you snore?
[THUMP]
What was that?
I don't know.
[GLASS BREAKS]
Don't worry. I'll go check.
No, Al! Call the police.
For noise?
It might be a burglar. Call the police.
I can't. Kelly's on the phone.
What are you doing?
Getting my gun.
You gonna tell me where you hid the bullets,
or are you gonna wait till the kids
see our pictures in the paper?
Come on, Al. I had to hide the bullets
so Bud wouldn't find them.
Where are they?
They're in the finger holes
of your new bowling ball.
Oh, this is real easy, Peg.
This is much better than keeping them handy.
Even an axe-wielding maniac deserves an even break.
Hurry, Al!
Where's Buck? Shouldn't he be barking?
I don't know.
You shiftless, worthless, dirty...
Peg, stay at the top of the stairs.
If anything happens,
get the kids, lock yourself in a room.
And if Kelly's off the phone, call the police.
[RUSTLING]
It's coming from the patio.
Oh, be careful.
I will.
Aah!
Okay, creep! I see you!
Freeze, or I'll shoot!
[GUNSHOT]
Oh, my God! Al! Al!
Oh!
Al, are you all right?
Yeah.
What happened out there?
I just shot Steve and Marcie's dog.
How could you shoot a dog?
He didn't look like a dog, Peg.
All I seen were these two yellow eyes
staring at me from the bushes and I told him to freeze,
and then I thought it made a move at me
and I panicked.
You couldn't tell the difference between a dog
and a human being?
He was wearing a hat.
Kelly, honey,
I was trying to protect our family.
That's right.
Dad did a good thing.
Can I go out and see the body?
You're disgusting.
And you're failing five classes.
Hey, hey, kids.
Listen to me.
We can all learn something from this.
What, Dad?
I don't know. Go to bed.
Aw, Dad!
I wouldn't argue with him, Bud.
He's already killed once tonight.
You were very brave, Al.
Aww...
Wasn't anything that anybody else
with the heart of a lion wouldn't have done.
I mean, you should've seen me.
Yeah, I was a little nervous,
but I got him right between the eyes,
and I'll tell you, there's not a lot of space between those eyes.
It was a nice shot, Al.
You want to go upstairs?
Yeah.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
You don't suppose that's Steve and Marcie?
MARCIE: Peggy, Al, it's us!
It's them. What are you gonna tell them?
I don't know. But if they don't bring it up,
we don't bring it up.
Hey! Steve and Marcie.
What brings you two crazy kids over here?
We heard a shot.
Peg, look who's here.
It's Steve and Marcie from next door.
They heard a shot, Peg.
Are you going to say anything tonight, Peg?
Uh...what was that you came over here for?
We thought we heard a shot, Al.
They thought they heard a shot, Peg.
Did you hear a shot?
Say something, Peg!
I think if there had been a shot,
their dog would have started barking.
Look, guys, I'm really sorry about that barking.
Oh, hey, forget about that.
Listen, we're friends and neighbors here.
We're not gonna let some stupid dog come between us.
Why isn't Bella barking?
I haven't heard him in a while.
Al, tell them.
Okay.
See...
I tell you, I really love you guys.
Do you love me, huh?
Well...sure, Al.
You know...
Not really.
Tell them, Al.
I'm not going to tell them anything
till they tell me they love me.
What's going on here?
All right.
Okay.
But you got to promise me that you'll let me finish.
Sure, Al.
I shot your dog.
I'm finished.
Bella!
Is he...
Alive?
Yes.
No.
Where is he?
He's out in my yard.
You can't miss him.
I didn't.
You stay here.
I'm gonna check on Bella.
You shot my puppy.
Look, I'm sorry.
We had a prowler stalking our yard.
Your dog came to my defense.
The burglar, he took a shot at me, and I fired back
and poor Bella got in the way
and was killed in the crossfire.
We only heard one shot.
It was a simultaneous exchange.
I don't know.
It happened so fast.
It's all a blur.
You shot my dog
in the middle of a bowel movement?
Steve, is he really dead?
Yes, dear.
How do you know?
Number one, he didn't respond to any of my commands.
And number two,
his brains are in the begonias.
You killer!
Anyone for cake or coffee?
Now, listen. I said that I was sorry.
Let me make it up to you.
Let me get you another dog.
For what, target practice?
We told them not to get a gun.
We told you not to get a gun.
But you had to go out and be Mr. Macho.
Now you've taken an innocent life.
Now, wait a second. This is not a defense,
but that dog was anything but innocent.
I mean, he bit you. He ate a cat.
Given enough time, he'd have robbed a bank.
How much you want for him?
$1,000.
$1,000 for a dog that just sat there
and let me shoot him?
You want to get off cheap,
next time, go plug a squirrel.
All right!
Forget the money.
You know what I want?
Yes, I do, and you're too late.
Peg's already got him.
Your gun, Al.
Give me your gun.
All right!
I want to take it and throw it in the Chicago river,
so it'll never hurt anyone again.
Here.
And from now on, we're just neighbors.
Now I know why we got our house so cheap.
Well, that's done. Where were we?
We were going upstairs...
Deadeye.
Well, all done.
Old Bella's on his way to the landfill.
It cost me $20 and a six-pack for the garbage man.
You'd think the dollar I give him at Christmas
would be enough.
Yeah. Oh, by the way,
I washed your killing clothes.
Have a nice day, honey.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
Hi.
Hi, Al.
Uh, listen, uh...
Some words were said last night,
and I just wanted you to know we talked it over,
and we understand you didn't do it on purpose.
You didn't do it on purpose, did you, Al?
Steve, I'm a pet owner myself.
Anyway, we decided to let it go and forgive you.
Thanks, buddy.
So I guess if you'll just give me Bella's body,
we can forget about the whole thing.
We want to give him a decent burial
you know, in our yard under that big tree
where he did his business.
Except, of course, for that last one.
Gee, I don't know what to say, Steve. Uh...
Yes, I do. I can't let you do it.
See, Peg and I talked it over
and we realized that since I'm at fault,
I should handle everything.
So let me take care of all the arrangements, huh?
Well, if it'll make you feel better,
I guess that would be all right.
Marcie will like that.
We'll do it tonight after work.
See you then.
Thanks, big guy.
Oh, uh...
Listen, uh...
Can you bury him with this?
He really loved this bone.
Sure, buddy.
Hey, Peg!
I'm late for work.
Can I ask you to do me a little favor?
[HUMMING "AMAZING GRACE"]
How much for the crate?
$150.
$150?!
Al, I didn't have time to comparison-shop.
Now I'd like to say a few words
about the dearly departed.
As you know,
Bella was more than a dog to Marcie and me.
He was family.
One of us.
Bella will be missed,
but his death was not in vain.
He taught us about the value of life
and that guns and violence
are not the answer to society's ills.
And we can take consolation in the knowledge
that while he only lived one year in dog's years,
he lived seven in people years.
[WHISPERING] What a great job.
I got to hand it to you.
That box even feels heavy enough
to have a dog in it.
What did you put in there anyway?
Some rocks and your bowling ball.
But knowing that he's...
right here...
in the back yard,
where he was so happy,
makes us all feel a little less grief.
[***]
MASH 1970 CD1
MASH 1970 CD2
MAX (2002)
M - The Murderers Are Among Us (1931)
Maboroshi no hikari 1995
MacArthur CD1
MacArthur CD2
Macbeth (1948)
Machinist The
Mackennas Gold
Macross II - The Movie
Mad City
Mad Dog and Glory
Mad Max 3 - Beyond Thunderdome
Mad Max II-The Road Warrior
Madadayo - Not Yet (Kurosawa 1993)
Madame Sat (Karim Ainouz 2002)
Made In Britain 1982 25fps
Mademoiselle
Madness of King George The
Madonna-Girlie Show - Live Down Under (1993)
Madonna - Truth or Dare
Maelstrom
Mafia
Mafia Doctor
Magdalene Sisters The
Magician The 1958
Magnificent Warriors
Magnolia (1999) Gowenna
Maid in Manhattan
Majestic The
Makai Tensho 2003
Making of alien vs predator
Mala Educacion La
Mala Leche
Mala educacion La 2004 CD1
Mala educacion La 2004 CD2
Malcolm X CD1
Malcolm X CD2
Malefique 2002
Malena
Malibus Most Wanted
Maljukgeori Janhoksa CD1
Maljukgeori Janhoksa CD2
Mallrats CD1
Mallrats CD2
Mamma Roma Pasolini
Man Apart A
Man Bites Dog
Man Called Horse A CD1
Man Called Horse A CD2
Man Called Sledge A
Man On Fire 2004 CD1
Man On Fire 2004 CD2
Man Who Knew Too Little The CD1
Man Who Knew Too Little The CD2
Man Who Knew Too Much The
Man Who Loved Women The
Man Who Shot liberty Valance The 1962
Man Who Went to Mars A (2003) CD1
Man Who Went to Mars A (2003) CD2
Man Who Would Be King The
Man Without a Past
Man of La Mancha (1972) CD1
Man of La Mancha (1972) CD2
Man of the Year The 2003
Man with the Golden Gun The
Manchurian Candidate The 2004
Mando perdido
Mangchi 2003
Mango Yellow
Manhattan
Manhattan Midnight
Manhattan Murder Mystery
Manhunter
Manji
Mann
Mannen Som Ikke Kunne Le
Mannen Som Log
Mannequin
Manon des Sources
Manon of the Spring
Manroof
Mans Best Friend
Map Of The Human Heart 1993
Mar Adentro
Marci X
Maria Full Of Grace (2004)
Marias Lovers
Marilyn Monroe - The final days 2001
Marius 1931 CD1
Marius 1931 CD2
Marnie (Hitchcock 1964)
Married With Children 1x01 - Pilot
Married With Children 1x02 - Thinergy
Married With Children 1x03 - Sixteen Years and What You Get
Married With Children 1x04 - But I Didnt Shoot the Deputy
Married With Children 1x05 - Have You Driven a Ford Lately
Married With Children 1x06 - Whose Room Is It Anyway
Married With Children 1x07 - Al Loses His Cherry
Married With Children 1x08 - Peggy Sue Got Work
Married With Children 1x09 - Married Without Children
Married With Children 1x10 - The Poker Game
Married With Children 1x11 - Where Is the Boss
Married With Children 1x12 - Nightmare On Als Street
Married With Children 1x13 - Johnny B Gone
Marrying Kind The (George Cukor 1952)
Marrying The Mafia CD1
Marrying The Mafia CD2
Martian Chronicles The 1980 CD1
Martian Chronicles The 1980 CD2
Martin Lawrence Live Runteldat
Marx Brothers - Horse Feathers (1932)
Mary Poppins 1964 CD1
Mary Poppins 1964 CD2
Mask of Zorro
Masque of the Red Death The
Masques (Masks)
Massacre 1989
Master And Commander - The Far Side Of The World (2003) CD1
Master And Commander - The Far Side Of The World (2003) CD2
Matango (Attack of the Mushroom People 1963)
Matchstick Men
Matrix
Matrix Reloaded (2)
Matrix Revisited The (2001) CD1
Matrix Revisited The (2001) CD2
Matrix Revolutions The CD1
Matrix Revolutions The CD2
Matrix The
Maurice 1987
Mauvais Sang
May (Lucky McKee 2002)
McKenzie Break The 1970
McLintock CD1
McLintock CD2
Me Myself I
Me Myself and Irene
Mean Creek 2004
Mean Girls
Meaning Of Life The (Monty Pythons) CD1
Meaning Of Life The (Monty Pythons) CD2
Medea
Meet Joe Black
Meet The Parents
Mekhong Full Moon Party (2002)
Melody Time
Memrias Pstumas
Men Behind the Sun
Men In Black
Men Make Women Crazy Theory
Men Suddenly In Black
Men in Black 2
Men in Tights
Menace 2 society
Mentale La
Mentale La (The Code)
Mephisto CD1
Mephisto CD2
Mercury Rising
Mermaids
Message in a Bottle
Metroland 1997
Metropolis
Metropolis (anime)
Miami Tail A 2003
Michael Collins CD1
Michael Collins CD2
Michael Jackson Moonwalker 1988
Michael Jordan To The Max 2000
Michel Vaillant CD1
Michel Vaillant CD2
Michelangelo Antonioni - Blow up
Mickey Blue Eyes 1999
Middle of the Moment
Midnight (1998)
Midnight Clear A
Midnight Cowboy (1969)
Midnight Express 1978
Midnight Mass 2002
Midnight Run CD1
Midnight Run CD2
Mighty Wind A
Milagro De P Tinto El
Milieu du monde Le (Alain Tanner 1974)
Millers Crossing 1990
Million Dollar Baby CD1
Million Dollar Baby CD2
Million Le 1931
Mimic
Mimic 2
Mindhunters
Minimal Stories 2002
Minority Report 2002
Miracle On 34th Street
Miracle Worker The
Mirror The 1997
Misery
Mishima A Life In Four Chapters DVDRip 1985 CD1
Mishima A Life In Four Chapters DVDRip 1985 CD2
Mission Cleopatra
Mission Impossible (1996)
Mission Impossible 2
Mission Mumbai
Mission The CD1
Mission The CD2
Mission en Marbella
Mississippi Burning CD1
Mississippi Burning CD2
Mississippi Mermaid 1969
Missouri Breaks The 1976
Mogambo CD1
Mogambo CD2
Mohabbatein CD1
Mohabbatein CD2
Mokey Business
Mole The CD1
Mole The CD2
Molly Maguires The CD1
Molly Maguires The CD2
Mommie Dearest (1981)
Mona Lisa Smile CD1
Mona Lisa Smile CD2
Monanieba CD1
Monanieba CD2
Monday
Monella CD1
Monella CD2
Money Money Money (Claude Lelouch 1972) CD1
Money Money Money (Claude Lelouch 1972) CD2
Mongjunggi
Monkeybone - Special Edition
Mononoke
Monsters Ball
Monsters and Cie
Monthy Python - Life Of Brian
Monty Python Live at the Hollywood Bowl
Monty Python Live at the Hollywood Bowl 1982
Monty Python and the Holy Grail
Monty Pythons Life of Brian
Monty Pythons The Meaning of Life
Monty Pythons and the Meaning of Life
Moon Child 2003 CD1
Moon Child 2003 CD2
Moon Spinners CD1
Moon Spinners CD2
Moonfleet 1955
Moonlight Whispers 1999
Moscow Does Not Believe In Tears CD1
Moscow Does Not Believe In Tears CD2
Mosquito Coast The CD1
Mosquito Coast The CD2
Most Terrible Time In My Life The (1994)
Mostly Martha
Mother India 1957 CD1
Mother India 1957 CD2
Mother Kusters Goes To Heaven 1975
Mother Night 1996
Mother The 2003 CD1
Mother The 2003 CD2
Mothman Prophecies The
Moulin Rouge CD1
Moulin Rouge CD2
Mouse Hunt
Mrs Doubtfire
Mrtav Ladan
Muhammad - Legacy Of A Prophet CD1 2002
Muhammad - Legacy Of A Prophet CD2 2002
Mujer mas fea del mundo La
Mummy Returns The - Collectors Edition (Widescreen)
Mummy The - Full-Screen Collectors Edition
Muppet Christmas Carol The
Murder By Numbers
Murder In The First 1995
Murder Most Foul (1964)
Murder My Sweet 1944
Murder at the Gallop
Muriels Wedding
Musketeer The
My Babys Daddy
My Beautiful Laundrette
My Big Fat Greek Wedding
My Boss My Hero
My Bosss Daughter 2003
My Girlfriends Boyfriend (Eric Rohmer 1987)
My Life as a Dog 1985
My Life to Live
My Neighbors the Yamadas (Isao Takahata 1999) CD1
My Neighbors the Yamadas (Isao Takahata 1999) CD2
My Son the Fanatic
My Tutor Friend (2003) CD1
My Tutor Friend (2003) CD2
My Wife Is A Gangster 2
My Wife Is Gangster
Mystery Of Rampo