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Sliding Doors 1992

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I deliver perfection...|and don't brag about it! :D
## Everybody stretch up for funky jazz #
# All aboard that funk boat, fat mama #|# 'Bout to start sailin' in an hour #
# All your rigors and all your body jiggers #|# Everybody's in the funky blowout #
# You know where I set sail from just #|# Around the corner from the Portobello Road #
# Downtown W10, in the west, baby #|# Baby, do what you done told #
# I got bottles of beer and a deck or two #
# Goin' out till the morning comes #|# And I said #
# Have fun, go mad #|# Do what I say #
# Have fun, go mad #|# Don't do what I do #
# Have fun, go mad #|# C'mon #
# Have fun living in the city #
# Have fun, go mad #|# Do what I say #
# Have fun, go mad #|# Don't do what I do #
# Have fun, go mad #|# So c'mon #
# Have fun living in the city... #
# Have fun, go mad #|# I like it #
# Have fun, go mad #|# Do what I do #
# Have fun, go mad #|# Have fun living in the city #
# Have fun, go mad #|# Do what I say #
# Have fun, go mad #|# Do it, do it ##
Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.|Oh, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.
Oh, shit. Hello, Helen.|I'd almost forgotten you work here.
I know, I know.|You'd almost forgotten I work here,
but I swear I was up all night|toying with ideas for the fashion show,
and I've really hit|on something. You see...
What?
I took 4 bottles of vodka on Friday.|It was my birthday. You know that.
I was having a party, and I was|running late, so I borrowed some.
- I bought some more to replace it.|- Not a lot of use to me
when I have nothing to offer|the executives who drop by late Friday.
You could have told them|you'd run out. It's popular stuff.
Bullshit, bullshit.|We're in P R. That's what we do, isn't it?
But you didn't do that, did you, Paul?
No.
So I'm out, am I?
Well, this is just perfect.
Congratulations.|You wanted me out for ages.
Now you've done it.|Very well done.
Theft. Pretty foolproof.
OK. I'll go. I'll go.|I was getting a bit choked up
with all the testosterone|flying about the place.
It's best I get out|before I start growing a penis.
Told you... Lesbian.
Whoops.
Thank you.
'District Line information.|Due to a derailment at Victoria,
District Line trains|are subject to extensive delay.'
'We suggest you find|alternative means of transport.'
You all right, luv?|Oh, it's a bit of a nasty cut.
Might need a couple of stitches.
## She's dragged me to the floor
# Just like she did before #
# And I can't take it no more ##
- Beatles lyrics, eh?|- What?
Elastic Thrombosis -|they're guilty of lyric poaching.
- They're Beatles lyrics, aren't they?|- I don't know. Sorry.
Of course you do. Everyone is born|knowing Beatles' lyrics instinctively.
They're passed into the foetus|along with all the amniotic stuff.
In fact, they should be called|The Foetles.
Not a fan, clearly.
Funny how nobody talks|on the tubes, isn't it?
I rarely catch|the tube myself, or lifts.
Confined spaces, everybody|shuts down. Why is that?
Perhaps we think everybody on the tube|is a potential psychopath or a drunk,
so we close down and pretend|to read a book or something.
Look, I don't think you're a psychopath,|I just want to read my book.
I understand. I apologise.
I'm in a little bit of a good mood today|as a matter of fact, so I'll just...
Sorry.
Have we met before?|No, no. Honestly.
- You seem familiar.|- I don't think so.
Yes. Yes, you were in the lift just now.|You dropped your earring, I picked it up.
- Oh, yes. You did. Thank you.|- Pleasure.
- Do you work there?|- I did do, but I've just been fired, OK?
Oh, that's...
- That's horrible. I'm sorry.|- It's OK. You didn't do it.
Thank you for your concern.|I'm glad you're in a good mood, et cetera.
Thank you for picking up my earring,|but I just want to read my book.
I get off at this stop.
I'm only telling you in case|you get off at this stop, too,
and you get off before me,|and you think I'm following you.
Which I'm not.|I mean, I wouldn't. You know?
I really didn't mean any offence. Please|forgive me. I'm really not a nutcase.
I apologise.
Excuse me.
I'm sorry.
I'm sure you're not a nutcase|or a psycho or anything,
it's just that I'm not...|I'm not that good at, um...
- you know...|- Constructing sentences?
Anyway...
- I'm James.|- Helen.
I never figured out|why we didn't make it, Gerry.
You went back to America, remember?|I couldn't afford the bus fares.
I came back, though.
Turn my back for three years, and|you callously ditch me for another woman.
I know. I suppose|I'm just naturally impetuous.
I live with someone.|A man. I live with a man.
- Really?|- Mmm.
I have people I consider soul mates|who don't confide in me this much.
And what would he say if he knew|you were walking up from the tube
in broad daylight|with a complete stranger?
Big deal.
It was nice to meet you, Helen.|Sorry about your job. Really.
I suppose being a Gemini|has its down sides.
Hey, remember what|the Monty Python boys say.
What, "Always look|on the bright side of life"?
No. "Nobody expects|the Spanish Inquisition."
## ... out in the streets to find out #
# Who's right and who's wrong #
# Oh, Candy and Ronnie #|# haven't seen them yet #
# Oh, but they're so spaced out #
# B-b-b-Bennie and the Jets #
# Ohh! #|# But they're weird and they're wonderful #
# Ohh! Benny... #
# You know, I read it in the magazines... ##
Ohh! Ohh!
- F-f-f-fuck!|- Yes!
What?
I didn't think you liked Elton John.
I... I do sometimes.
You really shouldn't stop like that.
Set a woman back three days|doing a thing like that.
- Who is she?|- She is Lydia.
Well, I've had a dreadful day.|I got sacked.
So did you, it would seem.
- Cup of tea?|- That'd be nice.
You bastard!
You bastard!|You useless, shagging bastard!
I come home and catch you up to your nuts
in Lady-shagging-Godiva!
I am working all hours|to support you
while you are supposedly|writing your first novel.
How long, huh?
Do you love her?|No, don't tell me. I'm not interested.
No, do tell me.|I am interested.
I'm only asking because I need to know|exactly how big a mug I am.
Look... look...
Hello!
- Helen? Is that you?|- No, it's your bit of stuff.
Wednesday...|shag day, remember?
## How can you stay #|# when your heart says no? #
# How can you stop #|# when your feet say go? #
Have you just got up,|you lazy git?
No. Uh...? Well, I, uh...
I didn't sleep that well last night.|And then, you know when you left,
I kind of... I went into a really...|a really, really deep, deep,
deep sleep.
I think I might be coming down|with a... Anyway,
what are you doing home|at this time of...
Oh, my God!
What happened to you?
Well, it depends.
- Which story do you want first?|- What?
Well...
I got mugged and...
- What are you doing?|- I can't stand Elton John.
You know that. Well, anyway, listen...
tell me what happened?|What happened to your head?
I got mugged and sacked,|only not in that order.
Though it wasn't an actual mugging,|it was only an attempted mugging
according to the police|because they didn't...
- Whoa, whoa.|- Because they didn't...
Wait a sec. Come here.|Come here.
Now sit down. Just sit here, OK?
Now... you're in shock, darling, OK?
You had... a little bit of a shock.|Now just relax.
Do you want a brandy?
- It's 4:00 in the afternoon.|- Of course it is. Sorry.
Gerry...
- Are you OK?|- Me? I'm fine. Fine.
Anyway, anyway...|t-tell me, what happened.
And I just couldn't help thinking
if I had caught that train,|it would never have happened.
I'd have been home|ages ago.
Oh, well,|don't wonder about things like that.
You know. "If only this...",|and "What if that..."
It's done now.
Come on.
Follow.
Splash.
I'm going to take you out
and get you alarmingly|out of your head on Grolsch.
And then dry.
And then follow.|Follow.
Follow, follow, follow.
And then, when you've sung all your|favourite Barbara Streisand songs
at the top of your voice|and got us slung out of the pub...
Yeah. Put this on.
I'm gonna let you have carnal knowledge|of a lamb passanda,
which your diet does not allow,|with a double tarka dahl,
which you can then puke
all over the pristine doorstep|of Herr and Frau Goebbels next door,
and I'll help you.
I love you, Gerry.
Gerry, she's not here.
Anna, you're Helen's best friend.|Where else would she be?
Come search the place if you want.|She's not here, Gerry.
What is it you've done, anyway?|Can't be that nice if she's walked out.
OK, look, I'm sorry. Look, if she|comes here, just let me know
or get her to ring me or something.|That's all I ask.
Like you say, Gerry,|I'm Helen's best friend.
If she comes here,|I'll do what SHE asks.
## I'll have this meagre defence #
# I was hoping that #
# You're an amateur #
# I was hoping that #
# You'd know better #
# But I've been wrong before ##
Well, she's got a point.|You can't stand Elton John.
Forget about Elton John.|That's not the issue. What do I do?
Gerry, you've told me for weeks you|couldn't hack it juggling Helen and Lydia,
and you wish you hadn't got|involved with her again.
I know.
- You weren't cut out for infidelity.|- I know.
But you couldn't end it with Lydia|'cause you weren't sure how she'd take it.
- I know all this.|- And I told you something...
if you remember my words... something|ungoverned by you would happen
to bring the situation|to a head.
- I know.|- And something has.
It's not funny, actually, Russell.
I'm sorry, old man. I beg to differ.
It is funny.|It's very, very, very funny.
And look at you. You're not rushing|about frantically trying to find her.
I went to Anna's.|She wasn't there.
Oh, went to Anna's?|Boy, you're a one-man SAS crack unit.
- You want my opinion?|- Will I like it?
Well, of course not.|It'll be based on reality.
No, no, no.|You don't advertise a new restaurant.
It's very uncool.|It's word of mouth. People talk.
And how do these people|who talk know where you are
so that they can talk|about you?
It's your restaurant, Clive.|I just want it to work. Helen.
Hello. James.
Rather annoying chatty|bloke on the tube?
Oh, yes. Hi.
You look all stressed up|with nowhere to go.
It's only a job.|You'll get another one.
No, it's something else,|isn't it?
Sometimes it helps|to just say whatever it is out loud.
It also helps if people mind their own|business and leave you alone. Sorry.
When I left you at the tube earlier,|I went home and found my boyfriend...
In bed with another woman?|Shit.
Oh, I'm sorry.|It's... I mean...
- What an idiot.|- It's OK. You weren't to know.
No, not me. Your boyfriend.|He's an idiot.
Sorry. It's not my place.
It's OK.
Look, if it makes you feel any better,|you see that bloke over there?
Not only does he own|a set of crocodile-skin luggage,
but his favourite|TV program is Baywatch.
So you see, there's always|someone sadder than you.
- Do you love him?|- No. I could never love a Baywatch fan.
Hey, you did a joke
in the midst of your turbulent|emotional state. That's very positive.
Listen, if you decide you want|company, we're over here, OK?
I'm really sorry, Helen.
Two of your most disgustingly|large Grolsches, please,
and a large Jack Daniels with ice,|and I'll have the same.
You're behind.|Can we have another?
15?
Gerry came looking for you.
- Is it what I think?|- It depends.
Is what you think that I walked in on him|shagging Lydia in my bed,
and I walked out?
- Pretty much.|- Then, yes.
Oh. Hold on. Yeah?
'This morning was sensational.'
- Oh. I can't... Sorry. I can't hear you.|- 'Gerry?'
- I can't hear you.|- 'Can you hear me? '
Didn't know it was on.|Ready, steady, go!
See you, James.
- Who's that?|- My friend.
Come on, you.|Let's get you home.
- Right.|- Drunken eejit.
OK. Whoa.
And again. Come along.
- Can I give you a lift anywhere?|- Yeah, that would be great. Thank you.
Hands up if you drank|too much, eh?
Hey, I'm not as drunk|as thinkle peep I am.
Put a wick in her mouth,|and she'd burn for a fortnight.
9 Menlove Avenue. Thanks a lot.
French bean, some chicken,|some rice...
- One more little Indian.|- No.
- Oh, come on.|- Really. I'll be sick.
Well, but we've gotta move locations|for that, so don't swallow for ten minutes.
He didn't fancy me.
He offered us a lift.|He was just being concerned.
Uh-huh. Well, let me tell you,|if he'd been that concerned about me,
I wouldn't be helping|you into bed right now.
Am I in bed?
Yes. You're staying with me for awhile.
Don't worry. You'll be fine.
Just fine.
There we go.
- There we go.|- Ohh.
'Are you some peculiar,|thus far undefined breed of dickhead?'
'You have two head problems...'
One - that was close.
Very close. Put in layman's terms,|she nearly caught you.
And two -
this is far more worrying|than the first one -
you're talking to yourself|in the mirror again.
Really bad sign.
Bigger sip.|Bigger sip.
Bigger sip. Don't throw up|all over me.
There are no PR jobs.
I'm going to need some|part-time work, Gerry.
What you need|is a change of image.
You know, it goes back and then,|you know, sort of comes like a slant.
## Baby, it's a changin' atmosphere #
# And I've seen the signs, I know #
# That it's right for me to go #
# I'm on my way #
# So when you think of yesterday #
# Remember all the things we said #
# And through the course of history #
# I hope you'll still #
# Remember me #
# And there can't be no other way #
# There's nothing left for us to say #
# I've got to see it through alone #
# I've got to do this on my own ##
- For you there.|- Hey, gorgeous...
what do you do when you're not|serving mad-cow burgers in here?
Well now, let me see.|I get up about 7:30 am.
Make and deliver sandwiches|in the West End during the day
before I come here about 6:00|and finish at midnight.
After that, if I've got any energy left,|I give me boyfriend a blowjob.
Would you like|some mayonnaise with that?
- You don't mean that.|- I do. Really.
So, you were together two years
and you've been sitting here|like suicide on a stick for a week.
- Nine days, Anna.|- For nine days. But bollocks to him.
Yes. I mean, why hasn't he even|called to see if I'm OK?
To admit that he's a twat.
Hello, Helen, it's Gerry.|I'm a twat. Please come home.
I love you. All that shit.|Oh, I don't care anyway. Bollocks to him.
- I'm over him.|- Oh, you're over him.
Yes. Totally and utterly|and completely over him.
- No, you're not.|- I am.
- You're not.|- Anna, I'm over him.
What do you mean I'm not?|How do you know I'm not?
Well, two things really.
You're still counting how long you've|been apart in days, hours and minutes.
But the flashing red light way|of telling you're not over someone
is reading their horoscope|in the hope they're going to get wiped out
- in some freak napalming incident.|- Smart arse.
- What is he?|- A wanker.
Oh, Aries.
Aries... Aries...
Well, just shows how much I know.
"With Mars in the ascendancy,
you will get wiped out|in a freak napalming incident
and Helen says bollocks to you."|This guy's good.
You go.|No, I will.
No, you.|I'm not in. I'm out.
You don't know where or who with.|Especially who with.
Quickly, go on!
I am not answering|the door like this.
Please, you have to.|It won't be him anyway.
So there's no big deal, is there?
Bollocks to him.|Bollocks to him.
Bollocks to him.|Bollocks to him.
Bollocks to him.|Bollocks to him. Bollocks to him.
Come on.|If you don't drink your fatty drinks,
you'll never really|achieve quality cellulite.
Your haircut suits you,|by the way.
No, it does.|It does. No gag.
Never make a joke about women's hair,|clothes, or menstrual cycles. Page one.
Look, James, maybe I shouldn't be here.
I'm sorry. I'm not being fair.
You know, under|normal circumstances etcetera,
you're really nice and funny.|My friend Anna thinks you're cute.
Wait, hold, hold.|Your friend Anna thinks I'm cute?
Your friend Anna thinks I'm cute?
Shit, I just blew...|Wait.
Oh, 2.85...|2.85 on the wrong girl.
Helen, listen.
Sometimes we are plonked|into people's lives
when they just need|to be cheered up and reassured
and it turns out|that for some reason it's your job.
We don't know why.|In your case, it's my job.
But, I'll be honest, the fact|that I find you moderately attractive,
just makes the job|easier on my part.
My intentions|are completely honourable.
I have no desire to overstep|the mark. Seriously.
You prefer diamonds or sapphires?|Sorry.
- "Moderately attractive"?|- A-ha! I knew you were listening.
Well, you know, lose the sad eyes,|the droopy mouth,
I could get you an upgrade.
So, having firmly established|the ground rules,
what are you doing two weeks|on Saturday?
- Probably killing myself.|- Excellent. What time does that finish?
Do you like boats?
Do you know|we haven't done that for two months?
- Don't be daft.|- Two months... almost to the day.
Almost to the day, listen to you.|What are we, a survey?
Gerry, how did one of my Waterford|crystal brandy glasses
get into|the laundry basket?
- To the where?|- The laundry basket.
I don't know. Can I answer|questions in seventies pop music?
Last week, when I got the sack|and I came back, am I going mad?
But wasn't there was some brandy|and two glasses on the dressing table?
- I don't know. I couldn't really say.|- Well, there were, I'm sure.
Oh, hang on, no, wait a minute.|No, I could say.
There was a bottle|and one glass because...
No, I'm certain there|were two glasses, Gerry.
Helen, I'm not sure I like|where this conversation is going.
No, I told you. I couldn't sleep,|so I got up in the night
to get a drink|to knock myself out.
It was still there in the afternoon|when you got home.
I mean, you had also that day,|if you remember,
had taken a blow to the... the head.|We just had a party.
Maybe one of your mad friends|like Anna threw it there.
I mean, Jesus!
Let's spoil the moment|properly, shall we?
What are you trying to say?|Am I shagging a brandy drinker? Yes.
Gerry, ease up, will you?|For Christ's sake. I'm only asking.
Oh, women never ask.
No, they don't ask, they insinuate.
And you are insinuating,|not very subtly, may I add, that I am...
Thanks.
No, no, no, no, no.|Thank you. Thanks.
I mean, thank you. Thank you.
I mean, this is the right time, isn't it,|to address our relationship, isn't it?
I mean, it's... it's... it's perfect.|Perfect moment.
Gerry, for God's sakes,|I asked a simple question.
There's no need|to become Woody Allen.
Thanks, James.|I'm sorry if you had a lousy time.
Are you kidding?
In my book, getting to drink|two chocolate milkshakes in one sitting
represents social splendour.|It's one of the perks of being shallow.
Take care, Helen.|You'll be fine.
Thank you very much.
It's amazing how you can actually learn|to despise inanimate objects.
Like tin openers|that don't open tins,
egg mayonnaise and Skipjack tuna.|You going out?
Yeah. I was just writing you a note.|I'm off to the library.
I have some stuff to read up on.
OK.
Well, I won't be more than|a couple of hours.
- Would you rather I didn't go?|- No, no, of course not. Go.
OK, bye.
Lydia, what are you talking about?|She followed me.
I said I was going to the library,|so I've come to the library.
For God's sake!
Of course I can't come now. What if she's|still lurking around the corner or something?
'So what? Is she there?'
Lydia, I don't know why|she followed me. I'm not a sleuth.
'I have taken 2 hours off work, Gerry.'
Please, don't get hysterical.|Look, I'm sorry! OK, I'm sorry!
I booked our hotel in Dorset.|Are we still going?
Do you want to cancel it? I mean,|is she going to follow us there?
Do you want to end this...
Yes. I mean, no.|I mean, no, I don't want...
Of course we're still going up.|Don't... don't...
Don't don't|don't don't what?
I don't know.
Look, we're going|to Dorset, OK?
We're going to have a great time|and I'll talk to you tomorrow.
Right, that's the lot.
- You don't live there anymore.|- Thanks for going again, Anna.
- Any evidence of her?|- Nothing that stood out.
- Hello.|- 'Hi, it's James. Is Helen there?'
Helen.
It's James.
Hello.
Yes, tonight. You know, the tonight|that comes immediately after today.
He wants|to go out tonight.
Go.
Please come.|It'll be a laugh.
- OK.|- Great. See ya.
- OK?|- Yeah.
- She doesn't want to leave here.|- I know.
She's really frail, James.|Do you want me to postpone my trip?
There's another course|later in the year.
It's only a couple of weeks.|You should go.
- You sure? It's not that important.|- It is important. I want you to go.
OK.
It's going to be hard|to leave this place, James.
But you've still got the London flat.
You'll be nearer the hospital, and|you can get much better crack in town.
Hey, you know|what the Monty Python boys say...
"Nobody expects|the Spanish Inquisition." I know.
Exactly!
Sorry. Let me just... Lydia's becoming|more and more demanding.
And you feel bad because Helen's|working night and day
to keep the money coming in.|But you've asked Helen to come
on a research trip to Dorset with you,|knowing that she won't be able to...
to cover up the fact that|you're really taking Lydia.
And despite the fact that Lydia|gave you an out on the phone,
which you didn't take,|you're having a moral dilemma.
Gerry, you are a morality-free zone.
If I had no morals,|would I be discussing it?
Whose idea was this trip...|yours or Lydia's?
You wanna get out of this Lydia thing.|I foresee problems.
And I wouldn't mind betting you're|talking to yourself in the mirror again.
- Very bad sign.|- You've no compassion.
None!
Why do I bother confiding in you?
I'm your mate.|I'm here to help you.
I'm sorry.
I'm here to help you.
Bom bom bom! Nobody expects|the Spanish Inquisition.
Our chief weapon is surprise.|Surprise and fear. Fear and surprise.
Our two chief weapons|are surprise and fear.
And a ruthless efficiency. Our three|main weapons are fear, surprise,
and a ruthless efficiency.|I'll come in again!
- Whoa! Wow!|- Pass me your plate.
- How do you do, Nigel?|- Very nice to meet you.
I am deadly serious.
Oh, just set up|my own PR company.
Yeah, well, why not?|You've got the experience,
the know-how, the contacts.
You want to spend the rest of your life|working for other people?
Hey, what's the worst|that could possibly happen?
I could fail miserably|and look like a complete tosser.
Exactly, so what is there|to worry about?
I had a really|nice time, James.
Did you? Oh, shit! Sorry.|That's against the rules, isn't it?
Yes, it is, so just bear that in mind|in the future, would you?
I'm getting over|a major break-up.
Yeah, sorry.|Won't happen again.
Good night, Helen.
Hey, you know everything|happens for the best.
You'll never know|if you don't try.
Wear something warm on Saturday.|It can get cold on the river.
Take care.
## Is that you? #
# Looks like you've #|# changed your ways again... ##
So, what other ideas|has James run by you?
Anna, don't do that.
Don't do desperate mother acting|with me. He's a friend, OK? Friend.
I'm not remotely interested|in him romantically.
- You're not.|- No.
So how come last night|was the first night you didn't ask
if anyone had called|when you walked in the door?
## What I know now #
# It's not always a happy ending #
# Yeah, but hey #
# Here comes that rainy day again #
# Hey, look at me #
# Don't feel like crying no more #
# I won't feel like crying no more #
# I don't feel like it #
# Hey, look at me... ##
You're sorry?
You're sorry that four of the staff here
have been cut down with food poisoning|after eating your sandwiches.
And yes, they all had the same sandwiches|and the same symptoms at the same time.
Are you trained|in the catering trade, may I ask?
No, actually, I work in PR
Well, you're not doing a particularly good|PR job this morning, are you?
Luckily for you,|I've convinced my colleagues
not to take the matter|any further... this time.
Now, if you'll excuse me,|I have five people's work to do.
Sorry? Helen has been delivering|sandwiches to your office.
Yes. And today I had|reason to summon her.
Well, I made up a reason,|to be brutally honest.
She's quite pretty in a British,|horsey sort of way, isn't she?
Lydia, what are you playing at?|Have you gone raving mad?
- She's not bloody stupid, you know.|- Oh, I wouldn't say that.
I wanted to see what the woman|you ditched me for is like.
Now, now, now, wait a second.|Now, I didn't ditch you for...
I mean, you went back|to America...
I wanted to see what this girl you seem|to have no intention of leaving...
despite the occasional pre-orgasmic|suggestion that you are...
has that is so unleaveable.
And I have to say that I ended|our brief meeting at a bit of a loss.
Lydia, don't talk like this.|Now, it sounds ugly.
I told you before I cannot leave|Helen for... for... for...
- You know.|- For me?
Is that what you're trying to say?
You can't leave her for me?
Well, you never said you|wanted that, have you?
Gerry, I'm a woman.|We don't say what we want.
But we reserve the right|to be pissed off if we don't get it.
That's what makes us so fascinating|and not a little bit scary.
- Hello?|- Ah, General Flanagan, at last.
This is your kindly Uncle Russell here.
Listen, wherever you were tonight,|as if we need to ask, you weren't with me.
- Helen called here looking for you.|- OK.
- Yeah, all right.|- OK, thanks, mate. Bye.
Thank God. I was so worried.|Where have you been?
I went to Anna's.|I needed to see a friendly face.
I've had a horrible day.
I met Cruella de Ville's|less-nice sister this morning.
- She completely deflated me.|- I know.
How do you know?
Well, no, I mean I can tell.|Jeez, you look terrible.
Where were you earlier?|I really needed to talk to you.
Oh, I had some stuff to read up on,|so I went to the library.
God, you're always at the library.
I'm sick|of waiting on tables.
I know when you finish the book|we'll be millionaires,
but when are you going to finish it?
I'm going to finish it|very soon, Helen.
Very soon.
Helen, there's something|I want to tell you...
I need to tell you.
Um, it's a little bit to do|with the brandy glass,
and a little bit to do|with that woman you met today.
Only please let me finish|before you say anything, OK?
Helen?|...Bollocks.
Come on, James!
Go, boy!|Come on!
Go!
## I've got an aching in my bones #
# I've been exposed #
# To what I want to see #
# The fuse is burning somewhere #
# It's drenched in me #
# It's where I long to be ##
It's really weird.|I knew there'd be a boat race going by
with purple and white shirts. Sorry?
Why hasn't he asked you|to go with him to Dorset?
He has. I've got to work.
Anyway, it'll be good for him|to get away. We need a bit of space.
Anna, can I ask a daft question?
Did you drop a glass in the laundry|basket at our party?
Sounds like a ridiculous thing to do.|It was almost certainly me.
- Are you OK?|- Just going quietly mad.
Thank God for that.|I was worried.
Faster!
Yes! Yes!
- And to my left|- And to my left
- And to my right|- And to my right
- And with my left|- And with my left
- And with my right|- And with my right
- And with the head|- And with the head
## Father #
# Abraham head had seven sons #
# Head, head #
# Seven sons had Father Abraham head #
Are you sure it's just|writer's block?
I mean, you seem so distant.
I'm here, Gerry, if you need|to talk to me about anything.
Hey, that's Helen in there.
# Seven sons|had Father Abraham head... ##
She's got blonde hair.
There's loads of them having|some kind of sponsored epileptic fit.
Lydia.
Maybe it isn't writer's|block at all, Gerry.
Maybe it's Helen block.
I don't want to hear about Helen.
I don't care about Helen.
The trouble is you do.
Quite clearly.
I just thought of a great|finish for your book.
"The End!"
Yes, you are, Clive.
He's opening|his first restaurant in six days,
and he's completely disorganised.
Well, you know,|at my old company,
we had wars getting|Pierre Claude's restaurant open.
- You did Pierre Claude?|- Mmm.
He's my hero.|You did his launch.
Well, I heard that was a really classy do.|People went on about it.
I mean, six days is...
Could I come down|and take a look?
I can't promise|anything stupendous.
Sure. Yeah! Yeah, no problem.
You're kidding.|Yeah, come down!
Pierre Claude. Oh, wow!
You're very thoughtful, James.|You give out an incredible amount.
Oh, you're the same.|You encouraged me today.
I saw you jumping up and down|like a mad thing.
It spurred me on.
I love this bridge.|My great-grandfather helped build it.
I often come and stand on it|when I want to...
Build a bridge?
I'm sorry.
Oh, God, James, don't.
- Oh, I'm sorry.|- No, I'm...
I know this is an ideal|sort of kissing moment.
You know, night, moon,|boat, water lapping.
You know, it's, um, it's perfect.
And I'm not not feeling|that it would be nice,
but I don't really|know anything about you
and I'm... l'm still|on the rebound.
Oh, God, I hate that word, but I am.
Oh, who isn't? Everyone is.
I'm on the rebound myself in a way.
- Who are you on the rebound from?|- A girl called Pamela.
My whole life pivots around|Pam and I breaking up.
- When was that?|- 1973. We were eight.
I bloody loved that woman.
No warning. Just up... gone.|Left me for somebody else.
- Who?|- Gary Glitter.
- Get out.|- Gary Glitter, for crying out loud.
I mean, all my friends were being left|for Donny Osmond or David Cassidy.
I could have come to terms|with that given time.
But Gary. Oh, she wanted|to touch him there, yeah.
You know? Well, I went to pieces|as you can imagine.
And there was no junior Prozac|to see me through, so...
So, I... I, um...
- I kissed you.|- Yeah, yeah, I spotted that, too.
You weren't going to do that.
Um, ahem,|would you mind, um,
just putting that down to a momentary|lapse of, um, concentration?
- Is that what it was?|- No.
Yes? I don't...|Oh, help.
I don't want to be a confusion|in your life, Helen. I don't truly.
But something's happened to me|since I've met you...
that I wasn't expecting,|and I don't really...
Well, well, wasn't expecting.
Repetition of expecting.|I must buy a thesaurus. Anyway, I...
You did remember to take a full|page out in Adulterer's Weekly?
Lydia, get in the car,|will you?
How many years have you been|going to paint that stain off?
## Ooh, I must believe #
# I can do anything #
# I can heal everyone #
# I must believe #
# I am the wind #
# Yeah, but I am the sea #
# Oh, oh #
# I am the wind, I am the sea, #|# I am the sun #
# I can be anyone #
# Oh, this world is mine #|# This world is mine #
# For all of time #|# For all of time #
# I can turn them to stone #
# Come let me fix my home #|# I can do anything #
# I'm gonna|get myself together... #
- He didn't even pay the bill.|- Of course not.
- I'm sorry... excuse me.|- Sure.
What do you mean|you want to see me?
Jesus Christ, Gerry, what...|How did you get in?
One of the waiters is a friend|of Russell. He got me a ticket.
It's a great do, Helen.|I hear your company's really taking off.
Gerry, you can't just turn up like this.|This is a really important night for me.
Yes, I can, Helen.|I can just turn up.
It's the most important|just turn up I've ever done.
Oh, God.|We can't talk in here.
# I must believe|I must believe... ##
We've been through too much just|to drop this, haven't we? Surely.
Helen, please, look at me.
I'm sorry.
Really sorry.
You're too good not to fight for.
Don't, Gerry,|don't talk about fights. I...
Good-looking bloke.
Are you seeing him?
I... I'm sorry.|It's not my place to ask.
- Is that him?|- I guess so.
- Does she know about Claudia?|- No.
I really like her, Clive.
I'm confused.|I feel a bit lost suddenly.
Gerry, I really have to go back inside.
Will you come|and see me, Helen?
Please, Helen,|there's so much more I want to say.
I miss you.
Will you come and see me?
Please, Helen...
I'll go.
Thanks for listening.|I'm really proud of you.
## I am the wind #
# Yeah #
# I am the sea #
# I am the wind, I am the sea, #|# I am the sun #
# I can be anyone #
# Oh, yes, I'm the night #
# That's right ##
Are you OK?
- Are you OK?|- Yes. Just a bit dizzy.
Too much champagne.
Sorry.
Hey.
It's official. I love you.
Thank you. You're a genius.|I'm ecstatic!
Have you seen James?
Yeah, yeah, he had to go.|Early start. He apologised.
Business trip. Newcastle or something.|I didn't want to pry.
His secretary wasn't very forthcoming.
- Do you believe he's away?|- Don't know.
- Think he's just avoiding you?|- I don't know.
- Did you leave a message?|- No.
Do you think maybe you should have?|Did he actually see Gerry kiss you?
I don't know.
Do you think he might be hoping you've|called and not known that you have?
Did you not check|if he has a mobile?
Anna, ease up, will you?|Bloody hell!
They have less questions|than these on Jeopardy.
I was nervous. I wanted to get off|the phone. I felt awkward.
Well, it's such a little thing.|It's hardly worth getting uptight about.
Oh, Gerry called, by the way.
Terrific.
That's just...
Two months ago, I want Gerry|to come around. James comes around.
Now I want James to call,|Gerry calls.
'It was the weirdest dream.'
'You were there, and you had|a funny mask over your face
and you had something that you needed|to tell me, but you couldn't say it.'
Well, that does it. I'm taking away|your class one drugs for a week.
Anyway, um, there's something else|I wanted to tell you.
- I fainted at work the other night.|- Sweetheart, are you OK?
Yes, but I don't normally faint,|so I, um...
- What was that?|- I don't know.
The people next door are plainly|engaged in some bizarre sexual ritual.
I may pop in later and introduce myself.|What were you saying?
Anyway, I don't normally faint,|so I was a little curious.
Oh! Oh!
Ow! Oh, sh...
I stubbed my foot on the side|of the shagging bath. Oh!
- God, sounds horrific.|- I know. Shh!
Anyway...
Listen, there's the landlady. She keeps|bringing corned beef sandwiches.
Look, I'll phone you back when|World War XII has stopped for tea.
So I did a test and it turns out|that I'm pregnant.
I just thought|you might like to know.
Have you gone completely insane?|What are you trying to do?
What do you mean what am I trying|to do? I think I broke my toe.
Lydia, I'm on the pissing phone|to Helen, for goodness sake!
In case you've forgotten,|she doesn't know you're here.
She thinks I'm on a research trip...|alone, remember?
I remember.
Don't worry, I remember.|It's pretty hard to forget.
So what are you trying to do, huh?
Coming in here screeching|the place down while I'm on the phone.
Don't you know, Gerry? Don't you know|what I am trying to do?
I am trying|to be your girlfriend, Gerry!
I am trying to win you back!|It's fairly simple.
I am standing on the platform|at Limbo Central
with my heart and soul|packed in my suitcase
waiting for the Gerry|fucking express
to roll in and tell me|that my ticket is still valid!
That I may reboard the train!
Only the station announcer|keeps coming on
and telling me|that my train has been delayed!
As the driver has suffered|a major panic attack in Indecision City,
we suggest you take the bus!
That's what I am trying|to do, you cripple!
Except...
it's quite clear that that|is never going to happen.
Is it?
No reply... Perfect.
So, I... I'm not waiting any more, Gerry.
I am cashing my ticket in.
I am taking that bus.
Oh, God. I tell all my friends,|"Never go back."
Look at me. I must be crazy.
Don't phone me for a while.
No, don't phone me at all... ever!
It's over!
Again!
I've done it, Russell.|I've bloody done it.
Excellent. Congratulations.|Done what?
- I've finished it.|- Oh, the book?
Oh, well, great, mate.|That's great.
Not the book, Russell.|I'm a novelist.
I'm never going to finish the book.|The affair.
The sordid affair with Lydia.|I've blown her out... in Dorset.
I was decisive, but fair.|I've just got back.
Oh, God,|I feel like I've got out of jail...
No more deceit,|no more lying to Helen.
It was such a mistake.|Never go back, Russell. It's over.
God, I can't tell you,|it's such a good feeling.
Well, I'm... I'm very pleased.|How does she feel about it? Lydia?
You know,|she's not jumping through hoops,
but it's the best thing by far.
By far and away, the best thing.|I mean, she knows that.
I mean, she will do...|Well, she was upset.
I mean, a bit fraught,|you know, ob-obviously.
Oh, God, I feel good.
I've got to get home|before Helen comes back from work.
You never even buy me flowers when|you're meant to! So yes, I'm suspicious.
What else have you been doing|that you're not meant to?
Wait. Let me get this straight,|because this is brilliant.
I buy you flowers on a whim,
in a... in a fit of... of... of, um...|of romance, but...
See? You couldn't even|think of the word.
But instead of being...|of being grateful,
instead of being romanced,
you're instantly convinced that I'm|ensconced in some decrepit, tacky,
underhand clandestine affair?
In a nutshell.
Gerry?
Are you back?
I missed you, so I came|home early to see you.
God.
What are they?
They're flowers. For you.
Do you not like them?
That image of her sitting on top of you...
Oh, God,|I don't know why I agreed to come.
Please stop, Gerry. Don't.|I don't want you to touch me.
I'm... I'm sorry. I... Don't go.
Please try and put her out of your mind.|She's out of mine.
It's finished... over.
I made a mistake...|such a big, big mistake...
and I'm sorry.|I'm truly, truly sorry.
I mean, this new bloke... this James|Hammerton that you're seeing...
- does he not make mistakes?|- How do you know his name?
A mate of Russell's|works at the restaurant.
They're mutual friends. I...|I mean, it's not especially important.
I don't want to talk about James|Hammerton or anyone else.
I have to go.
Oh, by... by the way,|I've, uh...
I've stopped writing the book.
Helen...
the truth is,
I can't write without you.|I can't do anything without you.
I want you to come|back to me, Helen.
We were so good together.
Remember how good we are together?
Sorry. Just wait.
- Yeah?|- I'm late four days. I'm never late.
Oh, Russell. Look, mate, look...
Can I ring you back|in a few minutes?
Yeah, OK.|Thanks, mate. Cheers. Bye.
That was Russell.
Look, I'm... I'm dying for the loo.
'Telephone number|0171-444-3184.'
'To return the call, press 3.'
Why are you pretending I'm Russell?|You know I hate that.
What's going on?
Gerry, answer me.|Who's there?
It's Helen, actually.|We met once.
I interrupted you faking your orgasm.|Sorry I can't be more specific.
You know what I was thinking?
- You're not going, are you?|- You wanker.
You sad, sad wanker.
God, I feel like such a mug!|That useless, no-good,
shagging, horrible,
despicable, lying,
two-faced, pissing,|shagging...
- You said shagging.|- Wanker!
You know the worst bit?|All I could think about was James.
I felt like I was being unfaithful|to James just by being there.
That sounds like the best bit.|And you were.
He didn't call, did he?
That's nearly a week.
I think I've blown it.|I've blown it, haven't I?
I blame British Telecom.|All this new technology...
this number to know who called,|another one to withhold your calls,
itemised bills, take away|the first number you thought of.
They are single-handedly condemning|the average red-blooded Englishman
to a life of terminal monogamy.
What are they after?|The Nobel Peace Prize?
Lydia might be pregnant.
Oh, no more, please.
I can't take it!
Oh, this is terrific stuff.
Being with you makes the wait for the next|episode of Seinfeld much easier to bear.
I didn't reckon on things turning out|this way. Everything's a cock-up.
What's going on?
Well, to use|boxing parlance, if I may,
it's quite simple - you've just lost.
Are you sure?|You've been a bit...
I don't know,|a bit distant since I've got back.
I know.
Well, OK, there are a couple of things.|Which one do you want to hear first?
- I don't mind.|- Well, the small thing...
is that I've got|an interview for a job...
a PR job...|a proper one.
An international company|opening up in London.
Chairwoman herself called...|said she had heard a lot about me,
and she's invited me to her apartment|tomorrow evening for a serious chat.
Jesus Christ!
- What?|- Jesus Christ,
I mean, that's...|that's not a small thing.
That's... that's huge.|That's... I mean, it's brilliant.
- I mean, that's the best.|- Is the blind buggered again?
No, uh... No. Well, I...
- Are you all right?|- Yeah... no, I'm fine, darling.
My sweetheart, that's great.|It's tremendous.
I'm thrilled. I'm so thrill...
- Hello?|- I really need to talk to you.
Hi, Russ.|How are you?
Come by my apartment tomorrow night|at 8:00. It's important.
Ah, really, mate? No. What a drag.|Oh, no. Yeah, sure, sure.
Yeah, I'll help you.|Yep. Cheers, mate. Bye.
Russell's family|is descending unannounced.
Yeah, he wants me|to go round tomorrow evening
and, help him clear out his spare room.
Uh, right. OK. So...
Right, then.
Sorry. What was the other|thing you wanted to tell me?
It doesn't matter.|It's not important.
Hamilton Enterprises.
Rachel, I'm going out to the shops.|Can I get you anything?
No, thanks.
- You OK?|- Yes.
Yes. Yes, I'm fine.
I just... You know,|I'm... go to the shops. I'll be, um...
- Sorry.|- Sorry.
- Hello.|- Hi. Hi.
- How are you?|- How are you?
- I'm great.|- I'm fine.
How are you?|Um, sorry. You're great.
- Business lunch?|- Yeah, just a chat, you know.
- My office is just around the corner.|- I know. Um...
I thought you were|away on business.
Yeah, I was. I just... I got back|last night, as a matter of, uh...
Helen, look, please|don't think that I...
Oh. It's OK.|I... I haven't thought...
I mean,|I didn't think that... or not.
No, I mean,|don't think that I have not called you.
I haven't not called you.|I mean, I don't...
I don't mean I haven't not called you,|because that's a double negative,
- so as to say that I have called you.|- When did you call?
Well, I didn't.
But I... I didn't not call you
in the way that you might think|I didn't call you. Oh, dear.
I wanted to call you.
I even dialled all but|the last number thing and then not.
- It's ridiculous behaviour.|- Totally.
You see, I thought you still had|to deal with... with your other, uh...
Oh. Gerry?
Well, I don't know.|Is that... yeah, if...
And I thought it was best|if I allowed you to...
- Gerry is why you haven't called me?|- Well, after Clive's party,
I didn't want|to just presume that we'd...
You think I just go to bed with all the|successful oarsmen I come across?
Sorry. Nervous humour.
Well, I hoped not.
Sorry. Excuse me.
Hello?
Oh, I see. I'll, uh...
I'll come straight away.|OK, thanks.
My mum had to go|into hospital.
She's had some tests done.|The results are through. I should go.
Do you want me|to come with you?
Yeah.|That's really nice of you.
Uh... Well, maybe, um...
I don't... She's quite frail,|and I don't know how she's going...
- It's OK.|- But, um, thanks.
I'm... Some friends are having|dinner at Clive's tonight,
if you're not doing anything.|You want to come along?
- Well, some other time.|- I'd love to, if that's OK.
Yeah, yeah.
Of course. Crikey, it's...|it's very, very OK, yeah.
Well, at the risk of sounding|old-fashioned, I'll pick you up at 8:00.
Is that a will pick me up|or a haven't, not, didn't, might?
Listen, don't worry about your mum.|She'll be OK.
Remember Monty Python.
Well, I'll see you later.
Bye.
- Hi.|- Hi.
- How are you?|- Just... you know.
Is Gerry excited|about being a daddy?
I haven't told him yet.
Never seems to be|the right moment somehow.
Come on. Let's celebrate|with a proper drink.
Bloody marvellous idea.
I really shouldn't in my condition,|but I'm really going to.
- What have you got?|- Brandy.
Ooh, no. Yuck.|Makes me vomit.
## Coming up for air #
# Rising to a very new #
# Somewhere #
# Coming up for air #
# I'm the last breath around #
# I'm the last breath around ##
Half day?
James?
So it was last night?
Sorry.
You can't tell from one.|They can be inaccurate.
I bought three packets.
Two in a packet... that's six.
You can tell from six.
What are you going to do?
- Is James Hammerton in?|- I'm afraid not.
Um, do you know|when he's due back?
I'm not sure. He's gone to visit|his mother in hospital with his wife.
Would you like|to leave a message?
What?
Can I take a name and number?|Get him to call you?
Um... No, thank you.
There's something|I want you to know.
Anna doesn't drink brandy, Gerry.|It makes her vomit.
And those glasses|were not used at the party.
They only come out for special dinners.|You know that.
Am I meant to immediately|get the reference here?
Are you having an affair?
Just tell me...|yes or no.
No.
I'm not.
Helen... look into my eyes.
I am not having an affair.
I'm not.
Well, I shouldn't have brought this up now.|I've got to go to my interview.
We'll talk later.
Are you going to be here|when I get back?
Yes. Of course.
Helen... listen.
Good luck, OK?
- Hello?|- Hi, Anna. Is Helen there?
You've got a damned nerve|phoning here.
What?
Anna, please, just open the door.|I don't know what's going on.
You don't know what's going on?|I'll tell you, then.
She saw you, James,|at the hospital with your wife.
You know, the one with the wedding|ring. What is it with you bloody men?
- Anna, let me see her.|- She's not here.
- Where is she?|- What's it to you? I don't know.
Oh, shit, shit. Bollocks!
Oh, God, you idiot!
- Clive, you seen Helen?|- No. Why?
Thank you!
Helen!
Helen!
Helen! Helen,|you've made a mistake!
Oh, I'm such an idiot!|Look at me, Helen.
- Listen to me, please.|- No, you listen!
I never want to see you again!
I have been through|enough for one year!
I stupidly believed|that here was a man
who was different from men,|but it is clear that I made a mistake.
Now please do me a favour|and go away!
I am married, Helen,|but I am separated.
Walk away if you want,|but take this with you...
the woman you saw today|was the woman I married three years ago.
We separated six months ago,|and soon we'll be divorced.
Nothing aggressive.
I didn't tell you|before, because...
I don't know why. I...
I have wanted to tell|you so many times, and...
and now you've found out another way,|I wish I had told you.
My mother is ill|in hospital, as you know,
and Claudia agreed|to keep up the pretence for my mum.
As a favour.|She's a very decent woman.
Do you have a mum,|Helen?
Ten minutes, Lydia, and don't ever turn up|at my kitchen window again like that.
It's over, you know?|You said it yourself.
I know. Sorry. I wasn't thinking.|I just want to show you something.
Oh, Helen... if we are not going|to be together,
let's make sure it's for the right reason,|and right now, there is no reason... none.
There is just confusion,|and it can be erased in a split second.
Get that, would you?
Of course,|if you don't want to keep it... Who is it?
Oh, hello again.|You're right on time.
Is this the truth, James?
Permission to engage the enemy, sir?
I can't take the interview just now.
I'm discussing whether or not I'm going|to keep your boyfriend's baby.
James... there's something|I have to tell you.
I'm so sorry you had|to hear it this way, Helen.
I'll tell Anna|I'm OK.
Helen...
I love you.
Helen, wait.|Please, wait.
- Let me go!|- Helen!
Helen!
James... are you her husband?
Uh... I will be.|We're... we're getting married.
If I could have a quick word?
Helen has suffered major|internal injuries, James.
Helen has lost her baby,|I'm afraid, Gerry.
I'm afraid she's lost her baby.
You did know|she was pregnant?
Did you know|she was pregnant?
She'll be OK, though,|won't she?
She is going to wake up,|isn't she, doctor?
Helen, for some reason,|I know you can hear me.
I'm glad we got things|sorted out tonight.
I'm glad you caught|the train that day.
I am going to make you|so happy.
I promise.
Helen?
Can you hear me?
Could you hear me, Helen?
- I'm sorry I'm late.|- Oh, no problem.
Your mother's showing some signs|of improvement this morning.
She's sitting up,|and she's had a full breakfast.
That's great.
Helen, I swear I...
- I'll do anything you want, darling.|- Will you?
In that case,|I want you to stand up...
walk over to the door...
open it, walk through it,
and close it behind you.
Ta-ta, mum.
## Mama, where's your pretty #|# little girl tonight... #
- Call us if you have any problems.|- Thank you.
You're very fortunate, Helen.|You had a lucky escape.
You can say that again.
# She's got a young man waitin' #
# Yes, she's grown up #
# She's got a young man waitin' #
# She's wide-eyed #
# She'll be streetwise #
# To the lies #
# And the jive talk #
# But she'll find true love #
# And tenderness on the block #
# But she'll find true love #
# And tenderness on the block #
# She was wide-eyed #
# Now she's streetwise #|# To the lies... #
Thank you.
Cheer up. You know|what the Monty Python boys say.
Nobody expects|a Spanish Inquisition.
# And tenderness on the block #
# Yeah, she's gonna find true love #
# She's gonna find true love #
# She's gonna find true love #
# My tea has gone cold, #|# I'm wonderin' why I #
# Got out of bed at all #
# The mornin' rain clouds at my window #
# And I can't see at all #
# And even if I could it'd all be grey #
# Put your picture on my wall #
# It reminds me that it's not so bad #
# It's not so bad #|# Bad, bad, bad, bad #
# I drank too much last night #
# Got bills to pay #
# My head just feels in pain #
# I miss the bus and there'll be hell today #
# I'm late for work again #
# And even if I'm there, #|# they'll all imply #
# That I might not last the day #
# And then you call me #
# And it's not so bad #|# It's not so bad #
# And I #
# Want to thank you #
# For givin' me the best day #
# Of my life #
# Ohh #
# Just to be with you #
# Is having the best day #
# Of my life #
# Push the door, I'm home at last #
# And I'm soaking through and through #
# Then you handed me a towel #
# And all I see is you #
# And even if my house #|# falls down now #
# I wouldn't have a clue #
# Because you're near me #
# And I #
# Want to thank you #
# For giving me the best day #
# Of my life #
# And, oh #
# Just to be with you #
# Is having the best day #
# Of my life #
# And I #
# Want to thank you #
# For giving me the best day #
# Of my life #
# Ohh #
# Just to be with you #
# Is having the best day #|# of my life ##
SLC Punk
SNL Best Of Eddie Murphy 1998
SWAT
S Diary 2004
Saathiya CD1
Saathiya CD2
Saaya CD1
Saaya CD2
Safe
Sahara (1943)
Sahara (with Michael Palin) ep1
Sahara (with Michael Palin) ep2
Sahara (with Michael Palin) ep3
Sahara (with Michael Palin) ep4
Sahara (with Michael Palin) video diary bonus
Sahara interview with Michael Palin
Saint Clara
Salaam Bombay CD1
Salaam Bombay CD2
Salaam Cinema 1995
Salems Lot 2004 CD1
Salems Lot 2004 CD2
Salesman - Albert and David Maysles (1969)
Salo Or The 120 Days Of Sodom
Salon
Salton Sea The
Salvador (1986)
Salvatore Giuliano (Francesco Rosi 1961) CD1
Salvatore Giuliano (Francesco Rosi 1961) CD2
Samourai Le
Samsara 1991 CD1
Samsara 1991 CD2
Samurai - Miyamoto Musashi - 03 - Duel at Ganryu Island
Samurai 2 (1955)
Samurai 3 - Duel At Ganryu Island 1956
Samurai Assassin 1965
Samurai Fiction
Sanbiki No Samurai 1964
Sand Pebbles The CD1
Sand Pebbles The CD2
Sands of Iwo Jima
Sanjuro (1962)
Santa Claus 2
Sante Trap The
Saragossa Manuscript The (1965) CD1
Saragossa Manuscript The (1965) CD2
Satans Brew 1976
Saturday Night Fever CD1
Saturday Night Fever CD2
Satyajit Ray - Apu Trilogy 2 Aparajito (1957)
Saudade
Saulabi
Sauvage Innocence 2001 CD1
Sauvage Innocence 2001 CD2
Savage Innocents The 1959
Savage The (2003)
Save The Green Planet (2003) CD1
Save The Green Planet (2003) CD2
Saved 2004
Saving Private Ryan CD1
Saving Private Ryan CD2
Saving Private Ryan CD3
Saving Silverman (R Rated Version)
Saw 2004
Say It Isnt So 2001
Scalphunters The (1968)
Scanners 1981 CD1
Scanners 1981 CD2
Scar The (1976) CD1
Scar The (1976) CD2
Scaramouche CD1
Scaramouche CD2
Scarecrow - (Kakashi) 25fps 2001
Scarface
Scarlet Diva
Scarlet Empress The (1934)
Scarlet Empress The - Criterion Collection
Scary Movie
Scary Movie 2
Scene At The Sea A (Japanese)
Scenes From A Marriage (1973) CD1
Scenes From A Marriage (1973) CD2
Scenes from a Marriage CD1
Scenes from a Marriage CD2
Scenes from a Marriage CD3
Scenes from a Marriage CD4
Scenes from a Marriage CD5
Scenes from a Marriage CD6
Schippers van de Kameleon CD1
Schippers van de Kameleon CD2
School Of Flesh The
School of Rock
Schpaaa
Schussangst (2003)
Science Fiction
Scooby-Doo - A Gaggle of Galloping Ghosts
Scooby-Doo - Thats Snow Ghost
Scooby-Doo - The Headless Horseman of Halloween
Scooby-Doo - Vampires Cats and Scaredy Cats
Scooby-Doo - Which Witch is Which
Scooby-Doo 2 Monsters Unleashed
Scooby-Doo and the Legend of the Vampire
Scooby Doo Project The
Scorched
Scorcher
Score The
Scorpio
Scorpion King The
Scream 3 CD1
Scream 3 CD2
Screwed
Scrooged (1988)
Seance
Second Nature
Secondhand Lion
Seconds (1966)
Secret Admirer
Secret Agents 2004
Secret Agents Into the Heart of the CIA
Secret Ballot 2001
Secret Lives of Dentist The
Secret Tears
Secret Window 2004
Secret life of Walter Mitty The (1947)
Secret of My Success 1987 CD1
Secret of My Success 1987 CD2
Secret of the Ooze The
Secret of the Sword
Secretary (2002)
Secrets of Women
Seducing doctor Lewis
See Spot Run
See no Evil Hear no Evil
Seinfeld
Seinfeld Chronicles The
Sense and Sensibility (1995)
Sentinel The
Seppuku (aka Harakiri) CD1
Seppuku (aka Harakiri) CD2
September
Serpents Egg The
Serpico
Serving Sara
Setup The (Robert Wise 1949)
Seven (1995) CD1
Seven (1995) CD2
Seven Brides for Seven Brothers
Seven Days in May (1963)
Seven Samurai (1956)
Seven Year Itch The
Seven Years in Tibet CD1
Seven Years in Tibet CD2
Seventh Seal The - Criterion Collection
Seventh Sign The
Sex Is Comedy
Sex Lies And Videotape CD1
Sex Lies And Videotape CD2
Sex and Lucia (Unrated Spanish Edition)
Sex and Zen
Sex and the City 3x13 - Escape From New York
Sex and the City 3x14 - Sex And Another City
Sex and the City 3x15 - Hot Child in the City
Sex and the City 3x16 - Frenemies
Sex and the City 3x17 - What Goes Around Comes Around
Sex and the City 3x18 - Cock A Doodle Do
Sex is zero
Sex lives of the potato men
Sexo Con Amor 2003
Sexy Beast
Sexy Beast 2000
Seytan 1974
Shadow The Universal
Shadow of a Doubt
Shadow of the Vampire
Shadows In Paradise
Shadows and Fog
Shaft 1971
Shakespeare In Love
Shall We Dance
Shallow Grave
Shallow Hal
Shampoo
Shane CD1
Shane CD2
Shanghai Knights CD1
Shanghai Knights CD2
Shanghai Triad
Shaolin Soccer UnCut (2001) CD1
Shaolin Soccer UnCut (2001) CD2
Shaolin Temple CD1
Shaolin Temple CD2
Shaolin Temple The 1979
Shape Of Things The
Sharasojyu
Shark Tale CD1
Shark Tale CD2
Sharp Guns (2001)
Shaun of the Dead (2004)
She Creature
Shelter Island 2003
Sherlock Holmes - Hound of the Baskervilles
Sherlock Holmes - The Eligible Bachelor
Sherlock Holmes - The Last Vampyre
Sherlock Holmes - The Master Blackmailer
Sherlock Holmes - The Pearl Of Death 1944
Sherlock Holmes - The Sign of Four
Sherlock Holmes 1x01 - A Scandal In Bohemia
Sherlock Holmes 1x02 - The Dancing Men
Sherlock Holmes 1x03 - The Naval Treaty
Sherlock Holmes 1x04 - The Solitary Cyclist
Sherlock Holmes 1x05 - The Crooked Man
Sherlock Holmes 1x06 - The Speckled Band
Sherlock Holmes 1x07 - The Blue Carbuncle
Sherlock Holmes 1x08 - The Copper Beeches
Sherlock Holmes 1x09 - The Greek Interpreter
Sherlock Holmes 1x10 - The Norwood Builder
Sherlock Holmes 1x11 - The Resident Patient
Sherlock Holmes 1x12 - The Red Headed League
Sherlock Holmes 1x13 - The Final Problem
Sherlock Holmes And The House Of Fear 1945
Sherlock Holmes And The Spider Woman 1944
Sherlock Holmes And The Voice Of Terror 1942
Sherlock Holmes Faces Death 1943
Sherlock Holmes Returns
Sherlock Holmes The Eligible Bachelor
Sherlock Holmes The Scarlet Claw 1944
Sherlock Holmes in Washington 1943
Shes All That
Shes So Lovely
Shes out of control
Shes the One
Shield The 2x01 - The Quick Fix
Shield The 2x02 - Dead Soldiers
Shield The 2x03 - Partners
Shield The 2x04 - Carte Blanche
Shijushichinin No Shikaku (1994 aka 47 Ronin)
Shiki-Jitsu (Hideaki Anno 2000)
Shin Zatoichi monogatari (1963)
Shine (1996)
Shinjuku - Triad Society (Takashi Miike 1995) CD1
Shinjuku - Triad Society (Takashi Miike 1995) CD2
Shinning The
Ship of Fools CD1 (Stanley Kramer 1965)
Ship of Fools CD2 (Stanley Kramer 1965)
Shiri
Shiryour gari
Shiver Of The Vampires The
Shocking Asia CD1
Shocking Asia CD2
Shoeshine
Shogun 1980 Part 1
Shogun 1980 Part 2
Shogun 1980 Part 3
Shogun 1980 Part 4
Shogun 1980 Part 5 and 6
Shogun 1980 Part 7 and 8
Shogun 1980 Part 9 and 10
Sholay
Shop Around The Corner The 1940
Short Circuit 2
Short Cuts CD1
Short Cuts CD2
Short Film About Killing A (1988)
Short Film About Love A (1988)
Short Film About Love A 1988
Shot In The Dark A
Show Me Love
Show Time
Shower
Showtime
Shredder (Greg Huson 2003)
Shree 420
Shrek
Shrek 2
Shriek if You Know What I Did Last Friday the 13th
Shuang tong (2002)
Shutter (2004)
Sib - The Apple
Sibiriada CD1
Sibiriada CD2
Sibling Rivalry
Siburay Bate Cafe
Sicilian The 1987 CD1
Sicilian The 1987 CD2
Siege The (1998)
Siegfried I
Siegfried II
Siegfried III
Signs
Silence of the Lambs The
Silencers The (Phil Karlson 1966)
Silent Trigger 1996
Silent Warnings
Silk Stockings
Silmido CD1
Silmido CD2
Silver City
Silver Hawk
Silver Streak 1976
Simon and Garfunkel - The Concert in Central Park
Simon of the Desert
Simone CD1
Simone CD2
Simpsons 01x01 - Simpsons Roasting Over An Open Fire
Simpsons 01x02 - Bart The Genius
Simpsons 01x03 - Homers Odyssey
Simpsons 01x04 - Theres No Disgrace Like Home
Simpsons 01x05 - Bart the General
Simpsons 01x06 - Moaning Lisa
Simpsons 01x07 - The Call of the Simpsons
Simpsons 01x08 - The Telltale Head
Simpsons 01x09 - Life on the Fast Lane
Simpsons 01x10 - Homers Night Out
Simpsons 01x11 - The Crepes Of Wrath
Simpsons 01x12 - Krusty Gets Busted
Simpsons 01x13 - Some Enchanted Evening
Simpsons The
Simpsons The 05x01 - Homers Barbershop Quartet
Simpsons The 05x02 - Cape Feare
Simpsons The 05x03 - Homer Goes To College
Simpsons The 05x04 - Rosebud
Simpsons The 05x05 - Tree House Of Horror
Simpsons The 05x06 - Marge On The Lam
Simpsons The 05x07 - Barts Inner Child
Simpsons The 05x08 - Boy Scoutz N The Hood
Simpsons The 05x09 - The Last-Temptation Of Homer
Simpsons The 05x10 - $pringfield
Simpsons The 05x11 - Homer The Vigilante
Simpsons The 05x12 - Bart Gets Famous
Simpsons The 05x13 - Homer And Apu
Simpsons The 05x14 - Lisa Vs Malibu Stacy
Simpsons The 05x15 - Deep Space Homer
Simpsons The 05x16 - Homer Loves Flanders
Simpsons The 05x17 - Bart Gets An Elephant
Simpsons The 05x18 - Burns Heir
Simpsons The 05x19 - Sweet Seymour Skinners Baadasssss Song
Simpsons The 05x20 - The Boy Who Knew Too Much
Simpsons The 05x21 - Lady Bouviers Lover
Simpsons The 05x22 - Secrets Of A Successful Marriage
Sin 2003
Sin noticias de Dios
Sinbad - Legend Of The Seven Seas
Since Otar Left 2003
Since You Went Away CD1
Since You Went Away CD2
Sinful Nuns of Saint Valentine
Singin in the Rain
Singing Detective The
Singles (2003) CD1
Singles (2003) CD2
Sink The Bismarck
Sinnui yauman
Sinnui yauman II
Sirens 1994
Sirocco 1951
Sissi 1955
Sister Act
Sister Act 2 - Back in the Habit CD1
Sister Act 2 - Back in the Habit CD2
Six Days Seven Nights
Six Degrees of Separation (1993)
Six Feet Under
Six String Samurai
Six Strong Guys (2004)
Sixteen Candles CD1
Sixteen Candles CD2
Sixth Sense The
Skammen (Shame Bergman 1968)
Skazka o tsare Saltane
Skulls The
Skulls The (Collectors Edition)
Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow
Slap Shot
Slap Shot 2
Slaughterhouse Five
Sleeper
Sleeper 1973
Sleepers (1996) CD1
Sleepers (1996) CD2
Sleepless in Seattle
Sleepover
Sleepwalkers 1992
Sleepy Hollow 1999
Sleuth (Mankiewicz 1972) CD1
Sleuth (Mankiewicz 1972) CD2
Sliding Doors 1992
Sling Blade CD1
Sling Blade CD2
Small Change (FranÇois Truffaut 1976)
Small Time Crooks 2000
Smell of Fear The
Smokey and the Bandit
Smoking Room
Snake Of June A (2002)
Snake Pit The
Snatch
Snatch - Special Edition
Sneakers 1992
Sniper 2
Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs 1937
Snowboarder
Snowfever (2004)
So Close 2002
Soapdish
Sobibor 14 Octobre 1943
Socrate
Sol Goode
Solaris (Solyaris)
Solaris (Tarkovsky) CD1
Solaris (Tarkovsky) CD2
Solaris - Criterion Collection
Solaris 2002
Solaris 2002 - Behind the Planet
Solaris 2002 Inside
Soldaat Van Oranje 1977 CD1
Soldaat Van Oranje 1977 CD2
Soldier CD1
Soldier CD2
Soldiers Story A (Norman Jewison 1984)
Solomon and Sheba CD1
Solomon and Sheba CD2
Sombre 25fps 1998
Some Kind of Monster CD1
Some Kind of Monster CD2
Someone Special
Something The Lord Made CD1
Something The Lord Made CD2
Somethings Gotta Give CD1
Somethings Gotta Give CD2
Son In Law
Son The
Sonatine
Song of the South
Sophies Choice
Sorority boys
Sorum
Sose me
Soul Guardians The (1998) CD1
Soul Guardians The (1998) CD2
Soul Keeper The (2003)
Soul Plane
Soul Survivors
Sound of Music The
South Park - Bigger Longer and Uncut
South Park 01x01 - Cartman Gets An Anal Probe
South Park 01x02 - Weight Gain 4000
South Park 01x03 - Volcano
South Park 01x04 - Big Gay Als Big Gay Boatride
South Park 01x05 - An Elephant Makes Love to a Pig
South Park 01x06 - Death
South Park 01x07 - Pinkeye
South Park 01x08 - Jesus VS Satan
South Park 01x09 - Starvin Marvin
South Park 01x10 - Mr Hankey the Christmas Poo
South Park 01x11 - Toms Rhinoplasty
South Park 01x12 - Mecha Striesand
South Park 01x13 - Cartmans Mom is a Dirty Slut
Soylent Green 1973
Spacehunter 1983
Spanish Prisoner The CD1
Spanish Prisoner The CD2
Spark the Lighter
Spartacus 2004 CD1
Spartacus 2004 CD2
Spartacus Fixed 1960
Spartan 2004 CD1
Spartan 2004 CD2
Spawn (1997)
Spawn (Directors Cut)
Species 3 CD1
Species 3 CD2
Speed 2 - Cruise Control
Spellbound (Hitchcock 1945)
Spetters 1980
Spider-Man CD1
Spider-Man CD2
Spider (2002)
Spider Man 2 CD1
Spider Man 2 CD2
Spies Like Us 1985
Spirit of the Beehive
Spirited Away CD1
Spirited Away CD2
Spirits of the Dead 1968 CD1
Spirits of the Dead 1968 CD2
Splash
Spoilers The
Spongebob Squarepants The Movie
Springtime In A Small Town
Spun (Unrated Version)
Spy Game
Spy Hard
Spy Who Came In from the Cold The
Spy Who Loved Me The
Spy Who Shagged Me The - New Line Platinum Series
Spygirl CD1
Spygirl CD2
Square Peg
Squirm
St Johns Wort - (Otogiriso) 25fps 2001
Stage Beauty 2004
Stage Fright 1950
Stagecoach
Stalag 17
Stalker 1979 CD1
Stalker 1979 CD2
Star Trek Generations CD1
Star Trek Generations CD2
Star Wars - Episode II Attack of the Clones
Star Wars - Episode IV A New Hope
Star Wars - Episode I The Phantom Menace
Star Wars Episode 4 (A New Hope) CD1
Star Wars Episode 4 (A New Hope) CD2
Star Wars Episode 5 (Empire Strikes Back) CD1
Star Wars Episode 5 (Empire Strikes Back) CD2
Star Wars Episode 6 (Return of the Jedi) CD1
Star Wars Episode 6 (Return of the Jedi) CD2
Stargate SG1 1x01 Children of the Gods
Stargate SG1 1x02 The enemy Within
Stargate SG1 1x03 Emancipation
Stargate SG1 1x04 The Broca Divide
Stargate SG1 1x05 The First Commandment
Stargate SG1 1x06 Cold Lazarus
Stargate SG1 1x07 The Nox
Stargate SG1 1x08 Brief Candle
Stargate SG1 1x09 Thors Hammer
Stargate SG1 1x10 The Torment of Tantalus
Stargate SG1 1x11 Bloodlines
Stargate SG1 1x12 Fire and Water
Stargate SG1 1x13 Hathor
Stargate SG1 1x14 Singularity
Stargate SG1 1x15 The Cor AI
Stargate SG1 1x16 Enigma
Stargate SG1 1x17 Solitudes
Stargate SG1 1x18 Tin Man
Stargate SG1 1x19 There but for the Grace of God
Stargate SG1 1x20 Politics
Stargate SG1 1x21 Within the Serpents Grasp
Stargate SG1 2x01 The serpents lair
Stargate SG1 2x02 In the line of duty
Stargate SG1 2x03 Prisoners
Stargate SG1 2x04 The gamekeeper
Stargate SG1 2x05 Need
Stargate SG1 2x06 Thors chariot
Stargate SG1 2x07 Message in a bottle
Stargate SG1 2x08 Family
Stargate SG1 2x09 Secrets
Stargate SG1 2x10 Bane
Stargate SG1 2x11 The tokra part 1
Stargate SG1 2x12 The tokra part 2
Stargate SG1 2x13 Spirits
Stargate SG1 2x14 Touchstone
Stargate SG1 2x15 The fifth race
Stargate SG1 2x16 A matter of time
Stargate SG1 2x17 Holiday
Stargate SG1 2x18 Serpents song
Stargate SG1 2x19 One false step
Stargate SG1 2x20 Show and tell
Stargate SG1 2x21 1969
Stargate SG1 3x01 Into The Fire II
Stargate SG1 3x02 Seth
Stargate SG1 3x03 Fair Game
Stargate SG1 3x04 Legacy
Stargate SG1 3x05 Learning Curve
Stargate SG1 3x06 Point Of View
Stargate SG1 3x07 Deadman Switch
Stargate SG1 3x08 Demons
Stargate SG1 3x09 Rules Of Engagement
Stargate SG1 3x10 Forever In A Day
Stargate SG1 3x11 Past And Present
Stargate SG1 3x12 Jolinars Memories
Stargate SG1 3x13 The Devil You Know
Stargate SG1 3x14 Foothold
Stargate SG1 3x15 Pretense
Stargate SG1 3x16 Urgo
Stargate SG1 3x17 A Hundred Days
Stargate SG1 3x18 Shades Of Grey
Stargate SG1 3x19 New Ground
Stargate SG1 3x20 Maternal Instinct
Stargate SG1 3x21 Crystal Skull
Stargate SG1 3x22 Nemesis
Stargate SG1 4x01 Small Victories
Stargate SG1 4x02 The Other Side
Stargate SG1 4x03 Upgrades
Stargate SG1 4x04 Crossroads
Stargate SG1 4x05 Divide And Conquer
Stargate SG1 4x06 Window Of Opportunity
Stargate SG1 4x07 Watergate
Stargate SG1 4x08 The First Ones
Stargate SG1 4x09 Scorched Earth
Stargate SG1 4x10 Beneath The Surface
Stargate SG1 4x11 Point Of No Return
Stargate SG1 4x12 Tangent
Stargate SG1 4x13 The Curse
Stargate SG1 4x14 The Serpents Venom
Stargate SG1 4x15 Chain Reaction
Stargate SG1 4x16 2010
Stargate SG1 4x17 Absolute Power
Stargate SG1 4x18 The Light
Stargate SG1 4x19 Prodigy
Stargate SG1 4x20 Entity
Stargate SG1 4x21 Double Jeopardy
Stargate SG1 4x22 Exodus
Stargate SG1 5x01 Enemies
Stargate SG1 5x02 Threshold
Stargate SG1 5x03 Ascension
Stargate SG1 5x04 Fifth Man
Stargate SG1 5x05 Red Sky
Stargate SG1 5x06 Rite Of Passage
Stargate SG1 5x07 Beast Of Burden
Stargate SG1 5x08 The Tomb
Stargate SG1 5x09 Between Two Fires
Stargate SG1 5x10 2001
Stargate SG1 5x11 Desperate Measures
Stargate SG1 5x12 Wormhole X-Treme
Stargate SG1 5x13 Proving Ground
Stargate SG1 5x14 48 Hours
Stargate SG1 5x15 Summit
Stargate SG1 5x16 Last Stand
Stargate SG1 5x17 Failsafe
Stargate SG1 5x18 The Warrior
Stargate SG1 5x19 Menace
Stargate SG1 5x20 The Sentinel
Stargate SG1 5x21 Meridian
Stargate SG1 5x22 Revelations
Stargate SG1 6x01 Redemption Part 1
Stargate SG1 6x02 Redemption Part 2
Stargate SG1 6x03 Descent
Stargate SG1 6x04 Frozen
Stargate SG1 6x05 Nightwalkers
Stargate SG1 6x06 Abyss
Stargate SG1 6x07 Shadow Play
Stargate SG1 6x08 The Other Guys
Stargate SG1 6x09 Allegiance
Stargate SG1 6x10 Cure
Stargate SG1 6x11 Prometheus
Stargate SG1 6x12 Unnatural Selection
Stargate SG1 6x13 Sight Unseen
Stargate SG1 6x14 Smoke n Mirrors
Stargate SG1 6x15 Paradise Lost
Stargate SG1 6x16 Metamorphosis
Stargate SG1 6x17 Disclosure
Stargate SG1 6x18 Forsaken
Stargate SG1 6x19 The Changeling
Stargate SG1 6x20 Memento
Stargate SG1 6x21 Prophecy
Stargate SG1 6x22 Full Circle
Stargate SG1 7x01 Fallen
Stargate SG1 7x02 Homecoming
Stargate SG1 7x03 Fragile Balance
Stargate SG1 7x04 Orpheus
Stargate SG1 7x05 Revisions
Stargate SG1 7x06 Lifeboat
Stargate SG1 7x07 Enemy Mine
Stargate SG1 7x08 Space Race
Stargate SG1 7x09 Avenger 2 0
Stargate SG1 7x10 Birthright
Stargate SG1 7x10 Heroes II
Stargate SG1 7x11 Evolution I
Stargate SG1 7x12 Evolution II
Stargate SG1 7x13 Grace
Stargate SG1 7x14 Fallout
Stargate SG1 7x15 Chimera
Stargate SG1 7x16 Death Knell
Stargate SG1 7x17 Heroes I
Stargate SG1 7x19 Resurrection
Stargate SG1 7x20 Inauguration
Stargate SG1 7x21-22 The Lost City I n II
Starship Troopers (Special Edition)
Starship Troopers 2
Story Of A Kiss
Strada La
Strange aventure de Docteur Molyneux
Street Of Love And Hope (Nagisa Oshima 1959)
Street of shame (Akasen chitai)
Streetcar Named Desire A
Style Wars
Suicide Regimen
Sukces 2003
Summer Tale A 2000
Sunday Lunch (2003)
Super 8 Stories
Superman IV - The Quest for Peace
Surviving the Game
Swedish Love Story A (1970) CD1
Swedish Love Story A (1970) CD2
Sweetest Thing The (Unrated Version)
Swept Away
Swordsman III - The East is Red
Sylvester - Canned Feud (1951)
Sylvester - Speedy Gonzales (1955)
Sylvester and Elmer - Kit for Cat (1948)
Sylvester and Porky - Scaredy Cat (1948)
Sylvester and Tweety - Canary Row (1950)
Sylvester and Tweety - Putty Tat Trouble (1951)
Sylvester and Tweety - Tweetys SOS (1951)