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Vampiyaz

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You gotta be quickerthan that, man.
Shut the fuck up!
Shit!
Sirens outside.
Cops coming.
Would you shut the fuck up? l'm trying to hearthe clicks.
Shut the fuck up.
Gonna get locked up overrthis shit.
Gotta find that shit. Just find it.
Aw, you bullshittin' right now.
Why you worryin' about..?
[laughing] Oh, no, you didn't.
Thats my bitch!
Oh, you know, bitch!
Get the fuck off me.
Son!
- You're a fuckin' clown. - Boomm!
Boomm! Thats what l'm tellin' you.
You don't worry about shit.
You just crack that motherfuckin' safe.
l got out here. l got this covered.
l wasn't worried. l just want you to shut up.
- Well, sometimes l can't shut up. - [laughs]
l'm the coach.
l'm the coach, man. You the playah.
l'm the coach!
Thats how we do it.
All right. Whatever.
The master motivator.
Get me a beerr, sweetheart.
Call me Bill Parcels out this motherfucker.
Yeah!
Thats... 15 and 0.
[roaring]
[roaring continues]
So this is it, man?
Yeah, man, this is it.
Sure nobody's home in there?
Can't nobody be home.
Ain't no lights on inside.
Well, no.
l know, man. Lcok at the window. l know.
All right?. Relax. Ain't nobody home.
We're gonna get in there, get the shit and get out.
Yeah.
What the fuck is that?.
What?.
What the fuck you got a gun for?.
- We need hheat, son. Protection. - No!
Come on, man. This ain't my neighborhood, B.
l don't like fuckin' guns on the job.
- Man, you're like a little bitch. - l'm not doin' it.
Calm down! You know how much paper's in there?
Shut the fuck up.
Son.
The rest of our lives, man.
Rest of our lives.
Never work again, B.
Shit.
l got a bad feeling about this shit.
Relax.!
lt's a wrap.
[chuckles]
l got a bad feeling, B.
Think about the fucking paper in there
and yourfeeling gonna get betteer.
Oh, damn. This shit is hot.
lt's upstairs?
[whispering, indistinot]
Yo! Where you goin', man?
Calm down for a second.
You said nobody was gonna be here.
Okay, okay. l fucked up.
l fucked up.
That nigga is sleeping hard.
You are the quietest, best nigga l know.
You said nobody was gonna be here.
He's sleeping right next to the fucking safe.
l fucked up.
The key is underthe fucking mattress.
But it's not underthe mattress. lt's a lot simpler.
Where is it?.
He sleeps with it around his neck.
For real.
Come on, son. Don't...
You's a funny nigga, boy.
l'm supposed to take the key from around his fuckin' neck?.
All we gotta do is lean the pillow up to the left.
Slide it overr his head.
Click. You grab the motherfucker and it's a wrap, son.
l don't work like this.
Come on.
Just... Okay, okay.
Okay, chill.
Calm down, son.
l don't work like this.
Tco many fuckin' risks involved.
He's sleeping on the fucking mattress.
We can't do this.
Do you know how much paper is in there?
l don't give a fuck. l'm not getting caught tonight.
And l have a bad feeling. Lets go.
- Lets go. - 70/30.
Ja, don't do this to me.
You barkn', son. l thought you was my man.
Eighty?.
All right!
All right.
Okay. 80/20. Okay.
Shit, nigga. You're trying to kill me.
Thats some fucked-up shit.
You got the back?.
Yeah, l got the fuckin' back.
Lets go.
-- [rap]
[crunching]
Yes!
AAah!
Hold it right there!
Hold the fuck it right there!
Close that dcor.
You stay on the ground.
Close that dcor. Yeah, thats right.
Chill out, man.
Just relax.
We're not worth it. Not worth it.
Not worth it. Not worth it.
Hey, stay down!
- My leg- - l told you to stay down!
[gun clicks]
Ha, ha!
You faggot motherfucker!
Don't hurt me!
Please don't hurt me.
You gonna shoot me? You was gonna shoot me?
- Don't hurt me. - Lets go.
Fuckin' punk.
Fuck you.
Okay, pal? Fuck you.
You're a curse to everyone.
You're a piece of shit.
The only thing good you could ever do for yourfamily is die.
What do you think about that?.
Fuck you, man.
You're a curse.
Bitch.
What the fuck?. Lets go.
Can't find the key!
Fuck. He's got the keys.
Hurry up!
You fucked up, man.
You really, really fucked up.
Why'd you shoot him?
We had fucking masks on, man.
He didn't know who the fuck we was.
[sighs]
Fuck!
He was layin' there lcokin' at me.
Eyes wide open and shit.
We had everything.
You done fucked up both our lives
and l'm not with that shit.
l told you l don't work like that.
Thats why l told you not to bring the fucking gun.
But no.
Don't want to fuckin' listen to nobody.
Just to fuckin' Khalil.
Fuckin' selfish.
Oh, no, you don't got shit to say?.
He said l was garbage.
Fuck you.
You are garbage and you're stupid on top of it.
[punches landing]
Don't fuckin' call me stupid!
Don't fuckin' call me stupid!
You fuckin'...
[tires squealing]
[crash]
[hom honking]
Oww!
Aww! Shit, nigga!
Fuck! Cracked my shit!
Lets get the fuck out of here, nigga.
What the fuck you doing?
Lets get the fuck out of here!
What the fuck you doin'?
We hit somebody.
Drive, nigga! l don't give a fuck!
Drive right now!
Fuck you, you stupid motherfucker!
Don't fuckin' call me stupid!
l'm done fuckin' with you.
Nigga, where the fuck you goin'?
Where the fuck are you going?
Don't say shit about my mother. Fuck, nigga. Fuck that.
- We'll talk about this shit later. - She lcok bad, man.
Come on! Get the...
Yo!
Son!
Ja, get the fuck back in the car, son.
Get the fuck off me!
Get the fuck off you?
Fuck that bitch.
Nigga, now! Now!
Now, nigga! Get up!
Come on, man! Fuck this bitch.
- Get off me! - Please, man.
We got the fuckin' money. Lets get out of here, man.
Yo, son, she's still alive.
Fuck it. We gotta be out.
We gotta get herto the hospital.
Fuck her. Somebody will find her.
- Hello? - Man, give me the
- Get the fuck off me! - Give me the fuckin' key.
Come on.
Get the fuck off me! Fuck you!
Fuck me?
Get away from me!
[mouthing words]
Can you hear me? Answerr me.
Fuck this.
Fuck that, nigga.
Yeah. Fuck that.
l told you, man.
l fuckin' told you to give me the keys, right.
You and this nervous shit all day.
All day fuckin' scared, man.
You gotta be betteerthan that, nigga.
Fuck!
[police siren]
[whimpering]
[police siren continues]
[whimpering]
Lets check this shit out.
[chuckles]
Hee, hee. Yeah. Oh, my gosh.
Thats some fly ruby shit.
Oh, yeah, baby.
- Hey. - Fuck, bitch!
[laughs] How you doin'?
- l'm doin' all right. - You want a date?
No, l don't. l ain't no trick. l'm busy!
l'm gonna hcok you up.
l can't get into that shit tonight.
l told you l can't.
Get the fuck off.
Yo, do me a favor, bitch.
Get the fuck up out of here. l'm busy.
Yo! What the
Aagh!
You're an aggressive salesman.
[gunshot]
[sighs]
Three in one night.
Must be some kind of fuckin' record.
[snarls]
[roars]
[roaring, snarling]
[groans]
AAaagh!
-- [rap]
Hello Opaline.
lt's Jakeem.
ls, uh...
ls Dad home?
l'm not in jail.
l got out today.
Didn't you guys get my letter?.
Can l just...
Can l speak to him, please?
Lcok, just let me talk to Dad.
You don't.
Hello?
[dial tone]
-- [mellow rap]
Hello, may l speak to Cheryl?
[dcorbell rings]
[rings]
Hi.
How you doin?
Nice place.
[Cheryl] So, whats your name?
My name's Richard.
Can l call you Dick for short?.
Richard, just to let you know,
l use condoms.
Just to get that out of the way.
l don't kiss mouth to mouth.
And l get paid up front.
So, if you want to pay me, we can get that out of the way
and get down to business.
Thank you.
Can l hear your real name?
Cheryl.
Or... well, with this agency, it's Cheryl.
With the other agency l work with it's, um, Shannon.
So, l guess...
[giggles]
l guess it's Cheryl.
Whatever you wanna call me.
Oh, you lcok so tense.
So why do you lcok so sad, Richard?
Just got out of prison.
Did eight years.
Jeez.
l hope you didn't drop the soap or anything.
[laughs]
Richard.
You gotta relax.
Come on. Here. Take your shirt off.
l'll give you a nice massage first.
Relax.
What time is it?. Hold on.
Okay. ln 20 minutes l have to make a call.
[sighs]
Well, don't worry, okay?.
lf you come really fast,
l can give you a nice price on the second time, all right?.
Consider it your ''getting-out-of-prison'' present.
Okay?.
All right?.
[whispers] Richard.
Lets take these pahts off.
Can you not be so aggressive?
You don't want me to take your pahts off?.
Could you just hold me?
Sure.
Yeah, sure.
Absolutely.
Excuse me.
Uh...
Could you tell me where 125 Main St. is?
You know, l don't know where that is.
Sorry.
l've beern lcoking for it everywhere.
Sorry.
Don't l know you?
Excuse me?
l'm pretty sure that l do.
l don't think so.
l think we might have had a math class together.
Math?
Calculus maybe?
Stacey, right?.
Yeah. [chuckles]
Whats your name?
lt's Jakeem.
Jakeem?
Sorry. l don't remember you.
l'm sorry l don't.
Oh, thats okay.
So, you lcok good.
You never left the old area, huh?
Nope.
Still here.
This is one of those kinda towns, l guess.
Parehts still live in the same place?
Yeah.
See anybody else from schcol?
Mm-mm.
Kinda fell out of touch, you know?.
So what happened?
Oh. Chair?.
Yeah. l mean, l'm sorry...
No, l'm used to it.
l just...
l remember.
Hit and run.
You know.
Hit and run?
Yup.
Damn.
Might've got a lcok at theirfaces or anything?
lt was a blur.
l was...
l think l was the only person at the scene.
Never caught the guys?
[hom honks]
No.
Never caught 'em.
lt's amazing how things like that
just slip through the cracks, huh?
[sniffs]
Huh.
Pretty amazing, yeah.
lf you could find 'em, l bet you'd just wanna kill 'em, huh?
l would.
Yeah.
Okay, all right. Lets just...
Anywayy... yeah.
You know, it's quite amazing that you don't remember my face.
l mean, l was quite popular.
[laughs] l was all about the books.
l wasn't really...
you know, messing around tco much.
Well...
lt was, uh... good seeing you.
Yeah, you tco.
Maybe l'll run into you again.
l'm back in town, so...
Jakeem, right.
Jakeem.
All right.
Take care.
You tco.
Whats up, Jakeem?
How you doin'?
Can l help you?
Yeah, l got a job for you.
l'm not interested.
Not interested?
l bet you Khalil would be interested though.
Yeah. l know that name rung a bell.
What do you know about that?.
- l know a lot of things. - Well, get talking.
l know that Khalil put you away for seven years.
You wanna get revenge on his ass.
While you're at it, put some cash
in them bum-ass pockets of yours.
Nah.
Nah?
You tellin' me you ain't tryin'
to get back at the motherfuckerthat put you away?.
And at the same time, put some money in your bum-ass pockets?
Come on, man.
Yeah, thats what l thought.
Take this and meet me at this address at 10:00 tonight.
[fly buzzing]
Mmm.
You know, there's a McDonald's down the street.
Hmm.
Ray.
Yo, Ray!
Ray!
[Ray] Yo, Jakeem, overr here.
Come here, man. l gotta talk to you.
What do you want, man?
Gotta explain something to you, man.
Explain or l'm leaving.
l'm bad at explaining. Give me a minute.
You betteer get good at it or l'm leaving.
Calm down. Whats up with the animosity?.
What the fuck am l here for?.
l'll tell you right now.
lt's a long story.
And it's gonna take a minute.
[roaring]
Ray. Wake him up.
Wake up, bitch.
Yo. Bitch.
Don't worry.
Nobody sucked on you.
Yet.
l hope not.
l remained a virgin in prison.
[chuckles]
So you two clowns are vampires, huh?
Aotually, no. l'm the only real vampire here.
Ray is like
ghetto fabulous version of Renfield or some shit.
Ever read Dracula?
So he should be pretty easy to kill.
Run that by me again. ''Pretty...''
You heard me.
He should be easy to kill.
You got all types of weaknesses.
Crosses.
Wooden stakes.
Silver bullets. Holy water.
See this nigga beern gettin' his read-on in prison, huh?
Daylight. Can't go to somebody's house unless you're invited.
Matter of faot, how'd you get this place?
Bought it... with the money we got at that last job.
Rememberthat last job?
[laughs] You betteer watch who you're kickin'.
l'm about to fuck you up. This ain't seven years ago.
This is my spot.
What the fuck do you want from me?
Need you to crack another safe.
What for?.
lt's not like you need any more money.
You gonna go buy a truckload of sunblock and chill at the beach?
Ha, ha. Thats funny.
No, l need an amulet
that will lift this fucking curse off of me.
l don't want to be a vampire no more.
And there's this amulet
and it's in a highly guarded safe
with a timer on it.
Kinda like that last job we did.
Yeah. We all know how that tumed out.
When l get the amulet-
l don't give a fuck about you. Whats in it for me?
A whole lot of paper.
So you mean to tell me that you're gonna pay me for a job
with money that you already owe me
forthe last fuckin' job we did together!
Exaotly.
Think about it, Jakeem.
l'm offering you a lot... of dough.
Who knows?
You could be set forthe rest of yourfuckin' life.
Can't get a job.
Joint, jail, job. No.
Who knows?
Maybe you can even buy that little cripple bitch some rims
- for her wheelchair - [chuckles]
forfuckin' her whole life up.
What if l don't do it?.
lf you don't do it... hmm.
l will rip out your heart and...
feed it to Ray.
Like that, Ray, right?.
Nigga lover heart.
Always tellin' me, ''Give me some heart, man.''
l'm not stupid.
Either way you're gonna screw me overr.
So you might as well suck me dry now.
Ungh!
Oooh!
You know what, Jakeem?
Think about it.
No need to make rash decisions now.
Contemplate.
Holler at me tomorrow.
Mover, nigga.
Hey!
How you doin'?
All right.
Where you headed to?
Oh, the grocery store.
Gotta pick up some milk and eggs and stuff.
And Twinkies and doughnuts.
Yeah, yeah.
One bag of Fritos. Thats it.
You can cook?.
Um...
Nah, forget it.
[chuckles]
Don't you wish you had someone to do that for you?
No.
l don't need anybody's help.
You don't wish you were rich?
Some money would help, l guess.
Pay some medical bills. You know. Stuff like that.
What would you do if you won the lottery?.
l guess l would...
Well, definitely pay off my medical bills, you know.
Umm...
Pay the rent.
Taking a vacation sounds nice tco.
Why are you asking me this?
l don't know.
You know, thats a common question.
'What would you do if you won the lottery?.'
Yeah.
l don't have a million dollars, you know.
lt's not a big issue for me now.
l'm sorry.
What is that?.
So you can buy a lottery ticket.
Lcok, l don't need your pity.
- l wasn't- - Really. l don't need your help.
Whats up, Jakeem?
Why you lcokin' like that, man?
Every time you come around here, you're lcokin' depressed.
That Matchbox bitch ain't giving you no pussy?.
[coughs]
Why you keep playin', man? [coughs]
Are you in or out?.
[coughs] Come on, lets go.
Come on, man.
Fuck.
Ahh! Lcok, man. Bull's-eye.
l didn't come here forthis.
Okay, boss, this is a job that we gotta do in the day
'cause they're not gonna expect us.
Especially two humans,
'cause they're usually guarding against vampires.
One and a half humans.
Okay, you got jokes.
This is a diagram of how it's gonna get down.
This is the front gate.
This is where the first guard is.
Afterthe first guard, there's gonna be two more.
How we get past the first guard?
Let me finish.
Once we get past these two guards here,
we head to this little room.
Thats where the safe is.
There might be one guard there. l don't know.
After we get pa-
When we get to the timer, we have about 60 seconds.
Afterthem 60 seconds, if we take tco long, it'll alert more, so you have to be quick.
How do we get past the first guard?
Tear gas.
Sounds like a fuckin' dheathtrap.
Thats what it is, man.
lf we use tear gas, the whole rest of the block
is gonna swarm down on us.
Neverthought of that one.
How are you so sure that there's three to four pecple inside?
- Possibly. - How do you know this?
This is what l scoped out three weeks ago.
After we get past the first guard,
you don't think the rest will just rush to the froht?.
l didn't think of that one right there.
Escape route?
The front dcor.
So there's no escape route.
Not that l know of. No.
[exhales]
l think you need to leave the plannin' to me and...
-just let me be the boss. - Okay.
'Cause you don't know what the fuck you're doin'.
Tend to your business, boss.
[sighs]
First rule...
is if we walk there and the shit dcesn't lcok right,
we leave immediately.
Okay. [clears throat]
Second rule is no guns.
What the fuck you mean, ''no guns''?
How we supposed to get past fourto five guards with no guns?
Smile at 'em?
No guns.
All right.
Just makin' this shit harder, though.
l get there and see you with a gun, l'm walkin' away.
Okay, boss. [clears throat]
All right, listen.
[Ray] Yeah, he by hisself. This should be very easy.
So, we ready to do this?
He by hisselftco.
lt's easy like that.
lt's simple.
We distraot him and then hit him in the head with the club.
Okay, that works.
So you ready to do this?
Whats wrong with you, man? You all right?.
Sure you don't got a gun?
l ain't got no weapon.
l don't need no weapon.
Yeah. l was serious when l said no guns.
Well, dawg, l ain't got no guns. What are you talkin' about?.
We good?
Come on. Stop playin' games. Lets go get this money, man.
You're crazy, man. For real.
You happy?.
Find what you were lcokin' for?.
Come on, man.
What y'all waht?.
Don't worry about what l want.
Who you here to see?
My girl, man. Relax man.
Your girl ain't here, playah. Keep it movin'.
- Here to see my girl, man. - What?.
Ain't l said, ''keep it moving''?
Who you talkin' to like that?.
Lets go. Clear out. Whats in your pocket, playah?
Whats in your pocket?.
- Take you hands out your pockets. - Fuck that, man.
We're about to leave, man. Sorry.
- No, fuck that, man. - Keep it movin'.
- What?. - What?.
Thats okay. lt's all right.
We're about to leave, man.
Fuck that pussy ass.
Yo, l got a situation out here.
These cats is aoting a little suspect.
What is that?.
- [gunshot] - Ow!
Now what, B?
What?. What?. What?.
l fuckin' told you no fuckin' guns, B!
Where you goin' with that, man?
Who you think you're talkin' to like that, man?
Who runs shit overr here? l do. Who got the gun? Me.
Now, take your ass up them steps.
Fuck you. l'm not doin' this.
l said take your ass up them steps, B.
Where you goin'?
Come on.
Don't trip.
Go ahead.
Thats what l thought.
Not tryin' to be here all day.
Speed it up, B.
l told you, man. Lets go. Damn.
[whooshing]
Oh, shit!
Come on. Lets go.
Watch your step, man.
Come on, man.
Why are you walking so slow?. Come on! Damn it!
Oh, shit!
Fuck!
Come on. l think l got him.
Shit!
Come on, man.
You're wasting tco much time, man.
l can't fuckin' hear!
What?. Stop bitchin', man.
The safe is right there. Lcok. The safe is right there.
You can't hear me?
Lcok, the safe is overrthere.
Walk this way.
Walk!
Bitch!
Come on, man.
Hurry up, man.
[ticking]
lt's C4.
Excuse me?
All right. l'll stand overr here.
Stay right there. l'll be right back.
Be back in a minute, all right?. Don't mover.
[ticking]
Yo!
Yo, yo!
Back away from that safe, man!
Yo, l'm gonna bust a shot in your head if you don't mover!
This is a waming, motherfucker!
You betteer get up, yo! Yo!
Oh, you're a brave motherfucker, l see.
Yo, back up off that safe!
Whats up?
What the..?
[gunshots]
[ticking]
Take this! Take this!
- Fuck you! - Take the fucking gun!
[groaning] Goddamn.
There's betteer ways to do things than shoot somebody, man.
Oh, yeah?
Oh, come on-
[ticking]
[clock ringing]
[ringing stops]
Mm-hm.
Oh, you're a sneaky motherfucker, eh?
Mm-hm.
- Funny, right. - How do you like that?.
Now we're about to get paid, for real.
- No more bullshit. - All right, big man.
- Take that to your boss and handle things. - All right.
l'm the boss, right?.
Lets go.
See, l told you no more guns.
Go ahead, man.
Where the fuck is your boss?
[Roy] l don't know.
Keep your panties on. l'm right here.
Hope you got the money.
So...
Lcoks like everything went okay.
Where's the fuckin' money?.
lt's right here.
Lcoks like everything went okay, huh?
What?.
He talkin' to you. You don't hear what he sayin'?
Seems like everything went okay!
Motherfucker deaf, man.
Did l go and get the shit today?.
What?.
Nigga, it seem like every..!
Everything went okay!
- Okay! - Yo, l lost my hearing, B.
lt's starting to come back, but you gotta speak loud.
Did everything go okay?.
l lost my hearing, so you gotta speak up.
[Both] lt lcoks like everything went okay!
Fuckin' dummy.
Yeah, everything went okay.
Now where's the fuckin' money?.
All right. First, give me the amulet.
What?.
Give me the amulet! l'll give you the money!
Motherfucker, l can handle it!
l know this shit ain't funny.
Give me the amulet!
l am handling it, bitch!
Amulet!
l am gonna handle it, motherfucker.
Yo, handle this motherfucker. He's getting out of hand.
l'm gonna blast his head off if you don't give me the money!
l don't give a fuck about that crackhead.
Well, fuck you then, man.
You want me to blast his head?
- Just give me - l'm handling it, bitch!
- Give me the fuckin' money! - Give me the amulet first.
And then l'm gonna give you the money.
You want me to handle it?. Put this nigga in a hearse?
l am handlin' it, bitch! Give me the money!
l'm going to give you the money.
l will blast his fuckin' head off
if you don't give me that motherfuckin' money!
Thats how l handle it! l handle it!
Fine! Fuck it! Damn!
All right?.
Right?. Count it. lt's there.
Open it, bitch!
You open it, fuckin' bitch.
Open it!
Open the motherfucker, Ray.
l dare you to fuck with me.
Fucked up, stupid.
There you go. Right there, stupid.
Close it.
Right?. The amulet.
Don't fuck with me!
You got your money. Give me the amulet.
You dumb, bitch.
[chuckling]
Thanks. [chuckling]
[wind gusting]
[groans]
[laughing]
Yeah!
Ha, ha!
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
So you're not a vampire anymore?
[chuckling]
Lets test it.
l guess not, motherfucker.
[chuckles]
l'm something far more
than a human
or a vampire.
You stupid motherfucker.
All these years l beern waitin' forthis shit.
All the fuckin' nights that l spent
sittin' in that fuckin' cell.
Just waitin' to bust your ass.
But you know what?.
You don't even deserve me to bust your ass.
[laughing] This nigga can't hear shit.
Just gonna light you the fuck up.
[laughs]
You sure is a funny motherfucker!
[chuckles]
Oh, yeah, nigga. lt's time to run.
l'm about to get up on that ass.
[hissing, snarling]
Get the fuck up off my amulet!
[all screaming]
[screaming continues]
[groans] Oh, damn!
[all screaming, groaning]
What happened? What happened?
This motherfucker got away with my amulet.
Thats what the fuck happened!
l'm sorry. l'm sorry, Khalil.
l don't give a filthy fuck about your apologies!
You get out there and you fuckin' bring me my amulet back.
Okay?. By any means necessary.
l got you. l got you.
l'll be back.
You didn't mean nothing about that crackhead shit, right?.
Ah, nah, man. You know you're still my number one bitch.
Get it.
Jeez. Whats the situation?
They killed four of our men and they have the amulet.
Four?. ls that Baker back there with his face hangin' off?.
Good news.
Whoeverthe dumb bastard is
didn't tum it overrto his master 'cause he's still movin'.
The beacon on the amulet is still workng, so we can track him.
What else we got?.
The security camera picked up a photo of these two clowns.
Not the brightest motherfuckers in the world.
Beautiful. We got l.D.s yet?.
Nothing, yet. lf we catch up with them we can-
- [electric humming] - Hold on.
He's movin'.
We can catch him and beat it out of him.
He's at Main St. now.
lf we mover now, we can get him in about a half hour.
Yes, lets go.
Gentlemen, pay attention!
Here's the situation.
We got four men dead. You don't want to be the fifth one.
Watch your backs and your necks. No mistakes today.
[snarling, growling]
[snarling]
[howling]
[snarling]
[howling]
[snarling]
Where you goin'?
- Got a light-skinned friend lcok like my complexion -
- Got a dark-skin friend lcok like my comple -
You gotta be kidding me.
- What?. - What the fuck are you singing?
Some shit on the radio.
- That shit has never beern on the radio. - Mm-hm!
- Check it, you know, l did hear a good joke. - Jeez, Ced, what you..?
- There's cough medicine in there. Don't touch that. - Yeah.
Like l said, l did hear a good joke, though.
Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and plastic bags?
What?.
One is used to carry your groceries.
The other is dangerous for children to play with.
[laughs]
What are you doin' about dinner?.
Throw Barry in there for me.
No more Barry Manilow, please.
lt helps me relax Cedric.
l'd rather listen to fuckin' Barbra Streisand.
Barry's the man.
l can't believe this, man.
What the fuck?. lt's him!
Whats he got around his fucking...
- He's got it around his neck like a gold chain. - Mover in. We got him.
Lets go.
Yo, my man. Can l talk to you for a second?
Hey. Can l talk to you for a second?
Fuck you, man!
Fuck you!
Get the...!
[gruhts]
Where you going?
What the fuck you all waht?. Who the fuck are you?
Stay still. Get him up.
Stay still, money.
You betteertalk now! Speak!
You know somethin'!
Stop frontin', motherfucker! Speak!
You killed four of our pecple.
What the fuck?. Speak already!
Gentlemen, gentlemen. Gentlemen.
We don't want to be rude to our guest.
Jakeem.
The infamous.
How are you?
l told you. l don't know what you're talking about.
Whatd you tell me? l didn't ask you anything yet.
How do you know what l'll ask?.
My name is Cedric.
Those men you murdered, those men were mine.
That amulet you stole, that belonged to me.
Now,
the questioning begins.
Are you ready?.
Who'd you steal that for?.
l told you. l don't know what you're talkin' about.
Really?. Really?.
Why would you come into my home, steal my amulet,
and kill four of my men?
Good men.
- l don't know if l believe him. - You don't know?.
This motherfucker's lying.
Security cameras watched you shoot one of my men in the leg,
so you had to have something to do with something.
Can you give me some information?
Talk!
You realize that you're just a vampire dog?
Huh?
lf you couldn't go out in the daylight,
you'd be just as dead as my men.
Since you don't want to tell me the story, l tell you what.
Okay.
l used to pitch forthe triple A.
Only reasons l never made it to the majors
was because l only had one pitch.
A hundred-mile-an-hourfastball.
Kinda defines me.
Straightforward and hard.
So now we're gonna play a game. You ready?.
Get my shit. Get my shit.
Now we're gonna play a game. You know what the game is?
Three strikes and Jakeem tells me all l wanna know.
Ready?.
Get the fuck outta here.
You lcok just like my catcher, baby.
Get outta town. So what are we sayin'?
Yeah!
Yeah! Check this out. Clear me some space, y'all.
Play ball!
Batter up!
Now, l'm gonna ask you one time.
We can end this now or we can go through yourthree strikes.
Give me a sign.
Oh, your hands are behind you.
l just assume you gave me the number one. How's that?.
You ready?.
Fuck you!
Here comes the first one.
Give me a sign. Huh? Ready?.
Fuck you!
[laughter]
Hang tough!
- Oh, shit! - He got heart!
He got heart, don't he? Which ear y'all waht?.
- Left! - Which one? Ready?.
Here it comes. You ain't got nothin' for me?
We can make this end now. l'll take that ear.
We can make it end.
Huh? Nothing?
Okay, here we go.
Here it comes!
Whooee!
l am the shit!
[all yelling agreement]
Hit him again!
Gentlemen.
Whats going on, Ced?
Just rappin' with our boy, Jakeem.
You know, tryin' to find out whats goin' on.
Just tryin' to figure out.
''Rappin'''?
Gimme the ball.
What ball?
Give me the ball.
What we got?.
The amulet. Thats first.
But as far as information,
this vampire dog dcesn't wanna give us any.
Kinda tight lipped, but
we'll get it out of him.
We're just gettin' friendly, right?.
Lcok...
l told you l don't know what you're talking about.
Bullshit.
Yeah, l did steal the amulet.
But it wasn't my choice.
You had choices, Jakeem.
They were all bad,
but you had choices.
Do you have any idea the powerthis amulet has?
Don't answerrthat.
Do you have any idea
what would have happened had Khalil got his hands on it?.
He would have beern invincible
to everything we have,
including daylight.
Or do vampire flunkies like you even care?
- Some shit funny?. - Whats funny?.
You're a bunch of stupid motherfuckers.
Why the fuck do you keep that amulet around?
Huh?
So some evil mastermind can steal the shit?.
And take overrthe world?
Oh, wait, wait.
Are y'all vampires?
Do we lcok like motherfuckin' vampires?
Then what the fuck you need the amulet for?.
l think you'll be needing us real scon.
l think you need to let me go.
l think you need to hold on to that.
Lets go.
Come on.
Lets go, Ced.
See you later, sweetheart.
See you next season.
You betteer run as scon as you let them shits go.
All right, bitch. l'm done fuckin' with you.
Where's Jakeem?
l don't know.
You don't know?. You don't know?.
l don't know who you're talking about.
You don't know who l'm talking about?.
You wanna play stupid now?.
Jakeem!
How many other motherfuckers beern followlng behind
your cripple ass the last couple days, huh?
Jakeem!
Little crusty ugly motherfucker always in your grill.
You don't know who l'm talking about?.
That nigga that put you in that fuckin' chair.
l don't know.
You don't know?.
Jakeem!
That ugly motherfuckerfollowlng behind
your cripple ass the last couple days.
You don't know who l'm talking about?.
Taking you to the store?
Pushing your dumb ass around in the street?.
You don't know, huh?
How many other motherfuckers push you around the street?.
Yeah! Cry, bitch! Cry!
Where the fuck is he?
- l don't know. - You don't know?.
- [laughs] - You don't know?.
You don't know who l'm talking about?.
lt's out of left field for you, huh?
You betteer start jarring your motherfucking memory!
You don't know Jakeem? You should know.
He put you in that chair.
Yeah! Yeah! Comin' back to you now.
Right?. Comin' back to you now.
[Ray] Vroom, vroomm!
How do you know he did this to me?
How do l know?.
Bitch, l was there!
l was in the car!
He hit your ass, jumped out.
l shot him in the arm, tcok my money.
Now l'm here, you're here,
and you ain't gonna be for much motherfuckin' longer
if you don't tell me where this nigga is.
Wco! Wco, woo, woo!
Whats up, kid?
Whats wrong?
What do you want, man? What do you waht?.
Nothin'. l thought you'd be lcokin' forthat cripple bitch.
You wanna get your ass whupped again?
You're always trying to whup somebody's ass.
You need to take some anger management courses.
What do you waht?.
Every time l see you,
you have a fuckin' attitude.
What the fuck do you waht?.
Nothin'. l thought you wanted to see your girl again.
What you mean? Where she's at?.
You know they tcok her, right?.
Where the fuck is she?
l don't know. l just said they tcok her.
Where the fuck is she?
l told you l don't know where she's at, man.
You betteertell me where the fuck she is.
The only way you're gonna
get her back is in exchange forthe amulet.
[Jakeem] l told you.
l don't have the amulet anymore.
Then you betteer get it back.
No, you betteertell me where the fuck she's at.
Hold this.
You're all just a bunch of motherfuckin' cowboys, huh?
Blastin' pecple on the street in broad daylight.
Whats up with that shit?.
Lcok, sorry we used you as bait, but it's procedure. Period.
Lcok... whatever.
l just don't want you
stormin' in the house like a blitzkrieg
while Stacey's in there.
l don't want herto get hurt.
You know, if l cared what you think, l'd be insulted.
l wanna make sure you all don't hurt Stacey.
Don't worry about your girl.
- Lets go, Ced. - Lets get out of here.
You all gotta let me come.
No way.
No civilians on my team.
Come on. lt makes sense.
He's expecting me with the amulet.
You get wounded in there ortum into one of them freaks,
thats it for me.
No job, no benefits.
You're suing us for something that dcesn't even make sense.
Shit, not to mention what happened to that cat, Clay Van Helsing.
They got him for 2.5 million just for mentioning
the Stake Party.
No way we bring this civilian.
Lcok, but l can be a decoy or something.
[Cedric] Yo, listen. No way.
Let me show up like l have the amulet
and his attention will be focused on me.
l can't even believe you're entertaining this bullshit.
l come by myself, he thinks l have the amulet
and then you can ambush him.
Lcok, l can benefit everyone.
You know what happened to-
Leave everybody, you know, happy, safe.
- And- - Use me as a shield.
lf you interrupt me one more time,
you won't make it out this basement.
Wait a minute. He has a point.
See? She's the smart one.
l should've aced you when l had-
But you didn't.
Lets go.
- [chuckles] - Lets go!
Don't tum your back on me inside the house, baby.
- Don't tum your back. - Lets go.
This is a violent bunch of folk.
l don't give a fuck.
Hello.
l got the amulet.
[glass breaks]
So...
AAah!
[gasps]
AAah!
[screaming]
[groaning]
[moans]
[roaring]
[screams]
Who's here?!
[gunshots]
[roars]
[distant scream]
Motherfuck!
[roaring]
You were fine, motherfucker.
No! Don't come near me!
You're gonna set off...
Don't! You're gonna set of the bomb!
You have to crack the oode.
Come on. We don't have much time. Please.
You're okay?.
Just crack the oode.
Please hurry! Crack the oode!
You have to hurry!
Hurry up! We don't have much time.
You gotta shut up so l can hear it.
Hurry up.
Come on.
You can do it. Hurry!
Come on! Hurry up!
We don't have much time!
lf you keep yellin', l can't concentrate.
Shut up!
You're gonna let me die!
Hurry! Come on!
[whispers] Hurry up!
Come on.
Come on, hurry up!
Please!
You owe me.
What?.
l know it was you.
[beerping]
[beerping continues]
[explosion]
Now that we got that bullshit out the way...
Do you have my amulet?.
[board creaks]
Yah!
Crosses!
Goddamn!
Fuckin'
dumb kid!
Don't you fuck with me, man!
Give me my shit! Give me my shit!
[sizzling] AAah!
AAah!
AAah!
l want the fuckin' amulet.
[moaning]
[moans]
Aagh!
Fuckin' cold bullshit!
AAh! l need my amulet.
Okay, okay!
lt's mine!
Okay.
Bust that ass.
[wheezing laughter]
AAagh!
[screaming]
[sizzling]
[coughing, gasping]
You... motherfuck!
- Ahh! - [sizzling]
[screaming]
[screaming, coughing]
[moaning, mumbling]
[coughing, moaning]
Ohh....
[sobbing] Ohh...
l'm dying.
Ow, there is a hell.
[moaning]
[phone rings]
[rings]
[rings]
[sighs]
[continues ringing]
Hello.
[Man] Oh, oh, thank God.
I have a severe, severe vampire problem.
You gotta help me out.
Hello?
Jesus Christ!
Come on, pal. You gotta help me out.
I run a mortuary business.
I got people coming out of theirgraves left and right.
You know how expensive it is to bury people again and again?
Families are going nuts!
Nobody's here, man.
Oh, you¡re killin'me.
Look, look, look, I'll do anything.
Just send somebody now.
I'll pay ten grand.
How much?
Ten grand.
ls that cash?
- These days I'm always tryin'to get at myself -
- Stressin; always workin' to impress myself -
- You see I gotta be, gotta be -
- The number one, that's my philosophy, honestly -
- I feel like the world's on top of me -
- Stoppin'me from movin'forward ever constantly -
- I M.C. because I'm not the type to silently, quietly -
- Stand by, I got a life to lead, time to see -
- I know a man named me that I gotta be -
- And fuck they, he and she 'cause it's not me -
- Know what I'm sayin' What ain't real about havin'a job -
- What the fuck isn't real about havin'a love -
- The same shit that's real about bein'a thug -
- The same shit that's real about a shotgun slug -
- The same shit that's real about college degrees -
- 'Cause that's the shit that got me kickin'out -
- Makin'these Gs -
- My brother Steve's on the court -
- 'Cause to ball is his dream -
- Mind the rhyme, how it is how it always has been -
- See it's not the lines that you read -
- But the shit in between -
- Thugs is made out of dirt yet I still stay clean -
- Because I'm real -
- This is for all my people ridin'the trains Stay real -
- Just to go to work in small-time chains -
- The really real livin'poor so it's not in their place -
- I stay real, don't give a damn what haters will say -
- I keep it real Yeah, I know these days it'sjust a cliché -
- But I was real way before you saw me on TV-
- I'm still real 'cause my momma brought me up that way -
- I'm really real 'cause I'm made of blood and not money -
- I'm what's real, really real This is something you feel -
- I say real, you say real -
- 'Cause it's something you feel -
- For all my real people that I cann feel -
- Put up your hands Pump your fists -
- Make some noise if you will -
- I'm what's real, real, real This is something you feel -
- In you room, in your ride on your box outside -
- In your headphones launchin'at you side to side -
- On your bus when you know you got a long-ass ride -
- Remember them days -
- Cats with the fat lip seemed to have it all made -
- And I love when my people livin'right and on type -
- But jealousy is a bitch... -
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