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Vegas Vacation 1997 CD1

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[INFORMATION] [TITLE] [AUTHOR] [SOURCE]Subtitles captured by SubRip 1.15 [PRG] [FILEPATH] [DELAY]0 [CD TRACK]0 [COMMENT] [END INFORMATION] [SUBTITLE] [COLF]&HFFFFFF,[STYLE]bd,[SIZE]18,[FONT]Arial 00:01:48.92,00:01:49.85 Hi, honey. 00:01:50.98,00:01:52.47 Smells good. 00:01:52.59,00:01:54.52 - Can I have...[br]- Don't, don't! 00:01:54.69,00:01:56.75 Come in here and gather around! 00:01:57.59,00:01:59.68 - I must show you something![br]- My new car? 00:02:00.09,00:02:01.36 Keep dreaming. 00:02:01.53,00:02:03.52 Here, eat these. 00:02:07.37,00:02:09.60 - They're chocolate chip.[br]- They're delicious. 00:02:09.77,00:02:10.93 They're 4 years old. 00:02:16.04,00:02:17.60 Anyone for milk? 00:02:17.78,00:02:19.21 8 years old. 00:02:20.21,00:02:23.44 It's my long-life food preservative.[br]It's been approved! 00:02:23.65,00:02:25.08 I got my big bonus! 00:02:27.49,00:02:29.65 - Congratulations.[br]- Isn't it great? 00:02:30.76,00:02:31.82 And... 00:02:31.99,00:02:33.32 ...that's not all. 00:02:33.49,00:02:35.15 Mr. Shirley thinks a guy like... 00:02:35.33,00:02:37.59 ...Clark Griswold deserves days off. 00:02:37.76,00:02:41.50 And Clark Griswold thinks he should[br]take those days off and... 00:02:41.67,00:02:44.93 ...take his family on a fabulous[br]vacation to... 00:02:46.11,00:02:48.77 ...fantastic Las Vegas! 00:02:52.18,00:02:54.61 There's nothing to do there. 00:02:54.78,00:02:59.34 Clark, I don't think that Las Vegas[br]is the kind of place you take a family. 00:03:00.05,00:03:01.52 Oh, come on. 00:03:01.69,00:03:04.02 Las Vegas has changed, Ellen. 00:03:04.19,00:03:07.13 It's the No 1 family[br]destination in America. 00:03:08.50,00:03:11.43 I'm not going.[br]The people there are so phony. 00:03:11.60,00:03:13.43 Is there legalized prostitution? 00:03:13.60,00:03:15.16 Not within the city limits. 00:03:15.34,00:03:17.10 But there is... 00:03:17.27,00:03:20.33 ...first-class entertainment,[br]beautiful scenery... 00:03:21.17,00:03:24.51 ...and all the shrimp cocktail[br]you can eat. 00:03:26.68,00:03:27.77 Listen, everybody... 00:03:27.95,00:03:31.78 ...how many more chances will we get[br]to do something as a family? 00:03:31.95,00:03:34.44 Ellen and I are always working. 00:03:34.62,00:03:39.12 And you guys are growing up so fast[br]I hardly recognize you anymore. 00:03:41.86,00:03:45.13 Okay. There's one more reason[br]why you should all go. 00:03:49.04,00:03:50.87 I'm remarrying your mom... 00:03:51.37,00:03:52.80 ...if she'll have me. 00:03:54.04,00:03:55.70 Really, Sparky? 00:03:56.64,00:04:00.04 What do you say? My 20th anniversary.[br]I could use a best man. 00:04:00.88,00:04:02.82 Have a bridesmaid in mind? 00:04:02.98,00:04:04.97 - How about Audrey?[br]- Audrey who? 00:04:05.39,00:04:06.22 Dad! 00:04:06.39,00:04:08.29 What do you say? Let's do it! 00:04:08.39,00:04:11.88 I think this is going to be[br]the greatest vacation ever. 00:04:28.51,00:04:31.24 You know you look really[br]beautiful right now? 00:04:38.25,00:04:39.41 You know, honey... 00:04:40.19,00:04:43.68 ...the guys at work tell me there's[br]this club we can join if we... 00:04:44.52,00:04:45.51 ...meet in the bathroom. 00:04:47.69,00:04:50.03 Clark, are you serious? 00:04:50.40,00:04:52.06 You love me, don't you? 00:04:52.23,00:04:53.96 I do, but here? 00:04:54.13,00:04:55.12 Now? 00:04:55.97,00:04:58.06 We've been married 20 years. 00:05:00.31,00:05:01.14 How do we do it? 00:05:02.08,00:05:04.24 Go first, I'll be behind you. 00:05:08.58,00:05:10.07 Are you okay? You look red. 00:05:10.25,00:05:12.08 Just going to the restroom. 00:05:24.93,00:05:26.26 Excuse me. 00:05:26.43,00:05:27.92 Where're you going? 00:05:29.60,00:05:32.50 Your mother's got something in her eye.[br]I'm going to... 00:05:32.77,00:05:34.76 ...help her get it out. 00:06:19.82,00:06:21.81 Maybe we should... 00:06:21.99,00:06:23.22 ...join... 00:06:23.39,00:06:25.82 ...some other kind of club. 00:06:26.56,00:06:28.72 I just want time with you. 00:06:29.73,00:06:31.99 I just think there's... 00:06:32.83,00:06:35.49 ...a better time...[br]- This will be our best one. 00:06:37.90,00:06:39.00 Foot, foot! 00:06:39.17,00:06:41.33 I got it. I got it. 00:06:44.41,00:06:46.17 I'll never fly again. 00:06:46.35,00:06:48.01 The pilot was helpful. 00:06:48.18,00:06:49.84 The whole plane applauded. 00:06:50.02,00:06:52.51 You two use these bathrooms,[br]we'll wait. 00:06:53.35,00:06:54.01 Is this ours? 00:06:56.69,00:06:58.35 We're the Griswolds. 00:06:58.53,00:07:01.02 Sorry, my pen burst in the altitude. 00:07:01.53,00:07:02.76 - I'm sorry.[br]- No problem. 00:07:02.93,00:07:04.52 Come this way, please. 00:07:04.70,00:07:06.69 This is it. This is it. 00:07:15.21,00:07:16.47 Look at this. 00:07:37.70,00:07:39.76 Wayne Newton. 00:08:08.19,00:08:09.56 It's beautiful! 00:08:12.73,00:08:14.29 You must see this. 00:08:21.91,00:08:23.31 Daddy! 00:08:24.08,00:08:24.91 Help! 00:08:25.08,00:08:26.48 I'm stuck! 00:08:28.58,00:08:31.31 Vegas, Vegas, Vegas. 00:08:46.33,00:08:48.60 Look! I think you'll want to see this! 00:09:09.79,00:09:11.02 Is this it? 00:09:11.29,00:09:13.69 Welcome to the fabulous Mirage. 00:09:17.63,00:09:20.79 Don't worry,[br]it won't leave a permanent line. 00:09:21.97,00:09:24.46 Come on, there's a lot to do. 00:09:24.64,00:09:26.63 There's a lot to do. 00:09:32.31,00:09:34.21 Welcome. Your credit card. 00:09:34.38,00:09:35.31 Yes, indeed. 00:09:35.48,00:09:36.47 Griswold, four. 00:09:36.88,00:09:40.38 We have an excellent[br]dry-cleaning service. 00:09:40.55,00:09:42.32 It's a birthmark. 00:09:45.49,00:09:49.39 To get to your room,[br]go through the casino, veer to the left. 00:09:49.56,00:09:54.23 Take a right at the first palm tree.[br]You'll see a group of blackjack tables. 00:09:54.40,00:09:56.39 Not baccarat, not craps. Blackjack. 00:09:56.57,00:09:58.83 Turn right and wind around left. 00:09:59.01,00:10:01.41 If you get to the pool,[br]you've gone too far. 00:10:01.57,00:10:05.67 You'll see elevators.[br]They aren't yours, stay away from them. 00:10:05.85,00:10:09.08 Keep walking, you'll see[br]more elevators, the gold ones. 00:10:09.25,00:10:11.34 Those are yours. Go to the 10th floor. 00:10:11.52,00:10:12.92 You'll find your room. 00:10:14.69,00:10:16.25 Any questions? 00:10:17.86,00:10:19.35 No, not really. 00:10:20.26,00:10:21.59 Russ! 00:10:21.76,00:10:23.52 Did you get that? 00:10:24.86,00:10:27.42 Well, let's go then. Thanks. 00:10:30.77,00:10:32.20 Good luck! 00:10:44.28,00:10:45.22 What's this? 00:10:48.79,00:10:52.88 Look at these people. Blinded[br]by glitter and the mighty dollar. 00:11:17.42,00:11:18.94 The elevators are there. 00:11:19.12,00:11:20.78 Hold on, honey. 00:11:20.95,00:11:24.86 They always put the machines[br]that pay the most in front. 00:11:25.12,00:11:26.18 $5? 00:11:26.53,00:11:27.46 Here we go! 00:11:36.84,00:11:41.17 You see, Las Vegas is already[br]bringing us closer together. 00:11:41.94,00:11:43.77 Let's go to the room. 00:11:47.11,00:11:49.01 Honey, call up the kids. 00:11:49.52,00:11:51.11 See how they like this. 00:11:56.36,00:11:58.95 Rusty and Audrey Griswold, please. 00:12:09.47,00:12:11.80 We're right next door.[br]Can't we get our own rooms? 00:12:12.14,00:12:14.54 Please don't spoil your daddy's fun. 00:12:14.71,00:12:16.37 Dad, we're too old for this. 00:12:21.88,00:12:23.31 Sit down. 00:12:24.55,00:12:25.64 Kids... 00:12:26.05,00:12:27.88 ...remember when you were babies? 00:12:30.22,00:12:31.99 It was a wonderful time. 00:12:33.39,00:12:34.99 We had your cribs right in our room. 00:12:35.06,00:12:37.72 We'd wrap you up in little blankets. 00:12:37.90,00:12:41.49 And roll you back and forth[br]across the bed into each other. 00:12:43.24,00:12:44.23 Those days... 00:12:44.40,00:12:46.24 ...they're almost over. 00:12:48.81,00:12:49.80 So... 00:12:50.48,00:12:54.97 To close out that one chapter,[br]I got tickets to Siegfried and Roy. 00:12:55.58,00:12:57.01 Best show on the planet. 00:12:57.18,00:12:58.84 Masters of the impossible. 00:12:59.69,00:13:02.35 We're going because[br]we're the Griswolds! 00:13:02.52,00:13:05.62 Can't you just wrap me up in a blanket[br]and roll me across the bed? 00:13:06.19,00:13:08.35 No, Russ. Get dressed. 00:13:16.77,00:13:18.70 Want to try some blackjack? 00:13:19.04,00:13:22.10 What do you know[br]about blackjack, Clark? 00:13:22.71,00:13:24.61 You forget I was in the army. 00:13:25.55,00:13:27.71 You weren't in the army. 00:13:27.88,00:13:31.37 Not in the army, but I have[br]played cards with men in uniform. 00:13:32.95,00:13:35.72 Just don't want you to lose[br]all your money. 00:13:36.62,00:13:40.96 When a man can come to Las Vegas[br]with a few extra bucks in his pocket... 00:13:41.13,00:13:43.62 ...throw a ten-spot down on a table... 00:13:43.80,00:13:46.63 ...pay an extra dollar[br]for a steak with his eggs... 00:13:46.80,00:13:49.06 ...that's a happy day for that man. 00:13:49.24,00:13:51.29 When his woman is at his side... 00:13:53.51,00:13:55.50 Is that Wayne Newton? 00:13:56.11,00:13:57.84 Why, you want his autograph? 00:13:58.01,00:14:00.10 I think he's staring at me. 00:14:02.12,00:14:04.35 No, no, no. I must be tired. 00:14:04.52,00:14:06.51 Maybe I'll go find the kids. 00:14:07.62,00:14:10.68 I think they want a little time[br]away from Mama and Papa Bear. 00:14:10.86,00:14:12.95 Let's let them get in trouble. 00:14:14.89,00:14:17.29 - I'm asking for five bucks![br]- What if you win? 00:14:17.63,00:14:19.86 You're boring to travel with. 00:14:20.03,00:14:24.30 Fine, you want five bucks? Here, you're[br]a big man. Here's the five bucks. 00:14:24.54,00:14:25.80 Get a wallet. 00:14:29.21,00:14:30.80 - Hi.[br]- Good evening. 00:14:31.54,00:14:33.71 Would the two of you have any ID? 00:14:34.78,00:14:38.27 We left our IDs upstairs, actually.[br]We're on our honeymoon. 00:14:38.45,00:14:41.85 Wait here for 2 minutes.[br]I'll go upstairs and get the ID. 00:14:42.02,00:14:43.61 I'll be right back. 00:14:46.86,00:14:48.12 My friend... 00:14:48.29,00:14:49.45 ...$200 in chips. 00:14:49.96,00:14:52.45 Good evening. Changing 200! 00:14:54.80,00:14:59.47 In blackjack, a smart player has[br]a mathematical advantage over the house. 00:15:01.04,00:15:02.80 Are you a professional? 00:15:02.98,00:15:05.14 Me? No, not really. 00:15:05.71,00:15:06.70 Are you? 00:15:15.56,00:15:16.89 Place your bet, sir. 00:15:17.06,00:15:18.55 Yes, the bet. 00:15:20.39,00:15:21.33 What the hell. 00:15:25.83,00:15:27.73 - Hit me.[br]- It's a bust! 00:15:27.90,00:15:30.49 Fun Police. Hand over your chips. 00:15:30.67,00:15:31.50 Eddie? 00:15:31.67,00:15:32.37 Twenty-two. 00:15:32.57,00:15:33.23 Player busts. 00:15:36.51,00:15:39.41 Oh, man, it is a blazer out there. 00:15:39.75,00:15:43.41 You're lucky you got air conditioning[br]in here like mother nature intended. 00:15:44.42,00:15:48.18 Clark Griswold, did you think[br]you could come to Las Vegas... 00:15:48.35,00:15:50.69 ...and not see your favorite cousin? 00:15:50.86,00:15:51.59 Your bet. 00:15:52.02,00:15:53.01 There. 00:15:53.19,00:15:54.92 Why're you in Las Vegas? 00:15:55.36,00:15:58.76 Where else can you wear shorts[br]24 hours a day? 00:16:00.60,00:16:02.59 I am on fire! 00:16:02.94,00:16:03.77 What? 00:16:03.94,00:16:05.27 Shuffling! 00:16:06.04,00:16:07.37 Here's the best part. 00:16:07.54,00:16:09.60 Thanks to my defective plate... 00:16:09.78,00:16:13.27 ...the VA gave me a huge plot of land[br]just north of town. 00:16:14.61,00:16:17.55 Every time I belch, the plate[br]shifts and my legs give out. 00:16:17.72,00:16:19.78 But what a view! 00:16:21.45,00:16:22.55 Nineteen. 00:16:23.96,00:16:24.72 Twenty! 00:16:24.89,00:16:26.88 Oh, he's good! 00:16:27.46,00:16:29.29 He's good! 00:16:31.90,00:16:35.06 - Another 100 in chips, please.[br]- Changing 100! 00:16:35.23,00:16:36.72 That's it, Clark. 00:16:36.90,00:16:38.23 Show them who's boss. 00:16:38.40,00:16:42.47 It's people who blow the family[br]nest egg here that built this town. 00:16:42.64,00:16:44.41 Not this pretty boy. 00:16:53.42,00:16:55.32 Oh, gee! 00:16:56.16,00:16:57.92 I can't believe it. 00:16:58.99,00:17:01.48 I've lost $300 in 15 minutes? 00:17:07.77,00:17:09.83 I'm okay. I'm okay. 00:18:03.82,00:18:04.55 You're kind. 00:18:06.29,00:18:08.28 What a great audience. 00:18:08.39,00:18:09.83 Yeah, always. 00:18:11.50,00:18:13.06 Terrific! 00:18:13.50,00:18:15.40 Where do you come from? 00:18:15.57,00:18:17.66 Me? Chicago, Illinois. 00:18:17.84,00:18:19.17 - Fantastic.[br]- Chicago! 00:18:20.41,00:18:22.57 Why don't you come on stage? 00:18:22.74,00:18:24.07 Come on, it'll be fun. 00:18:24.24,00:18:25.84 - Go on![br]- Yeah, Dad, do it! 00:18:26.58,00:18:28.51 Okay, I'll play along. 00:18:32.15,00:18:33.05 Applaud! 00:18:34.89,00:18:35.72 Good to have you. 00:18:37.06,00:18:38.46 What's your name? 00:18:39.33,00:18:40.62 Clark Griswold. 00:18:40.73,00:18:41.45 Marvelous! 00:18:41.66,00:18:43.79 Let's do some real magic. 00:18:44.56,00:18:46.39 Listen, I know the routine. 00:18:46.57,00:18:50.23 What's it going to be tonight?[br]Wires? Mirrors? Trap doors? 00:18:51.97,00:18:53.96 I happen to know a little magic myself. 00:18:54.17,00:18:56.14 I don't know if you've seen this. 00:18:58.18,00:18:59.97 Can you tell it's my thumb? 00:19:00.18,00:19:02.24 Looks like it is, but it's not. 00:19:02.98,00:19:05.31 Whatever, I'll do what you want. 00:19:05.69,00:19:06.91 I'm here to help. 00:19:08.89,00:19:09.98 Enter. 00:19:10.19,00:19:12.09 Okay, I know this one. 00:19:12.26,00:19:14.19 - Trust me.[br]- All right, I will. 00:19:16.96,00:19:19.45 Is this going up? I'll go with it. 00:19:20.40,00:19:21.23 Me. 00:20:22.19,00:20:23.46 Where's Dad? 00:20:23.63,00:20:25.79 I haven't got a clue. 00:20:40.81,00:20:42.37 It's my husband. 00:21:00.33,00:21:02.56 How'd you do at the tables? 00:21:04.84,00:21:05.83 I'm about even. 00:21:09.31,00:21:10.83 Why'd you tell Eddie we were here? 00:21:10.91,00:21:15.51 Oh, come on. How often do I get[br]to see my cousin Catherine? 00:21:16.42,00:21:19.18 Anyway, we're just[br]stopping by for lunch. 00:21:19.85,00:21:21.18 I want to gamble. 00:21:23.19,00:21:24.25 Russell... 00:21:24.69,00:21:27.09 ...I never want to hear[br]you say that again. 00:21:27.26,00:21:30.35 Gambling is a very serious business. 00:21:30.76,00:21:31.92 Is that clear? 00:21:32.60,00:21:34.36 Excuse me a minute. 00:21:57.06,00:21:58.28 Fifty on black. 00:21:58.46,00:21:59.55 No more bets. 00:22:01.23,00:22:03.63 Red 25! Red wins! 00:22:03.80,00:22:05.63 Jeez! 00:22:24.42,00:22:25.75 Shall we? 00:23:15.37,00:23:17.20 Remember me? 00:23:17.87,00:23:19.30 Yes. 00:23:26.31,00:23:27.87 Love you. 00:23:39.33,00:23:41.05 Your baby? 00:23:56.58,00:23:58.54 Are you watching for an address? 00:23:58.71,00:24:00.11 What block is this? 00:24:00.28,00:24:01.77 Very funny, Russ. 00:24:02.05,00:24:03.71 Will you check the map again? 00:24:03.88,00:24:05.37 Could that be it? 00:24:06.72,00:24:09.21 Eddie said there was room for a pool. 00:24:09.39,00:24:11.29 Get out the sunscreen. 00:24:19.50,00:24:21.56 Cousins! 00:24:22.07,00:24:23.30 What do you think? 00:24:24.50,00:24:28.41 Can you believe they tested H-bombs[br]on this beautiful property? 00:24:30.31,00:24:32.14 I missed you so much. 00:24:39.42,00:24:41.41 Don't you worry about radiation? 00:24:41.65,00:24:44.59 All I know is my teeth[br]have never been whiter... 00:24:44.76,00:24:46.92 ...and my garden has 50-pound tomatoes. 00:24:49.03,00:24:51.09 Denny-boy, come on over here! 00:24:51.26,00:24:53.09 Look at that view. 00:24:53.27,00:24:56.93 It's government property around us,[br]so no one will build. 00:24:58.27,00:24:59.33 Look at this one. 00:25:01.27,00:25:02.76 They grow up so fast. 00:25:03.44,00:25:05.84 I tell him he'll pierce[br]himself shut one day... 00:25:06.05,00:25:07.27 ...but what can you do? 00:25:07.45,00:25:09.04 He likes eating through a straw. 00:25:09.18,00:25:11.78 They must make their own mistakes. 00:25:15.05,00:25:15.78 Does that hurt? 00:25:15.95,00:25:16.78 It's not bad. 00:25:17.19,00:25:18.55 Who's hungry? 00:25:21.63,00:25:23.06 Need help with the grill? 00:25:23.20,00:25:25.79 No, thanks. Don't have one. 00:25:33.57,00:25:35.20 I'll get the tongs. 00:25:40.58,00:25:43.48 Renewing your wedding vows? 00:25:43.65,00:25:46.31 Oh, that's so wonderful. 00:25:46.82,00:25:50.31 I wish Eddie and I had time[br]for that sort of thing. 00:25:50.49,00:25:53.08 But with the constant windstorms... 00:25:53.23,00:25:54.99 ...and flash floods... 00:25:55.16,00:25:57.09 ...oppressive heat and... 00:25:57.23,00:25:58.49 ...home schooling... 00:25:58.66,00:26:00.15 ...we don't have a minute free. 00:26:00.33,00:26:01.99 Can you hand me that mitt? 00:26:05.90,00:26:07.67 I love the kitchenette. 00:26:07.84,00:26:09.17 Oh, thanks. 00:26:09.34,00:26:12.40 Listen, things could be a lot worse. 00:26:12.61,00:26:14.60 Yeah, you could be pregnant again. 00:26:21.02,00:26:22.25 I've been... 00:26:22.42,00:26:25.12 ...earning money[br]testing fertility drugs. 00:26:25.26,00:26:27.19 This one's going to be a winner. 00:26:28.43,00:26:30.52 Everyone loves a baby. 00:26:33.13,00:26:34.69 Yeah, life is good. 00:26:34.87,00:26:36.53 My kids are thriving. 00:26:36.77,00:26:39.86 Little Ruby Sue must have grown[br]a foot since you saw her last. 00:26:40.04,00:26:42.20 Daddy, I caught another snake. 00:26:42.37,00:26:43.74 That's good, sweetheart. 00:26:43.91,00:26:46.07 Put it in the pit with the others. 00:26:46.25,00:26:48.01 And go work on your typing. 00:26:52.35,00:26:53.51 Nice kids. 00:26:55.59,00:26:57.92 Don't ever pick me up again... 00:26:58.09,00:26:59.35 ...jerk! 00:27:03.26,00:27:05.36 Look who's home! 00:27:06.10,00:27:08.69 This one here's my pride and joy. 00:27:10.87,00:27:14.07 Lord is my witness, I hate this heat! 00:27:14.14,00:27:18.20 If it ain't gluing your butt to a seat[br]it's making you sweat like an animal! 00:27:18.38,00:27:20.44 And I want something better! 00:27:21.45,00:27:23.21 Hey, everybody. 00:27:23.78,00:27:25.77 You remember Vickie? 00:27:25.95,00:27:27.89 She's a dancer now. 00:27:28.05,00:27:29.38 Her picture's everywhere. 00:27:29.69,00:27:32.35 Phone booths, men's rooms... 00:27:32.39,00:27:33.72 She's famous. 00:27:33.89,00:27:37.06 Show them that little move[br]I taught you there. 00:27:48.91,00:27:52.24 Don't think unnatural thoughts[br]about your cousin. 00:27:58.65,00:28:01.81 She's got her mama's looks and[br]her daddy's sense of balance. 00:28:02.02,00:28:04.72 Hose down, kids![br]Chicken's almost ready! 00:28:04.86,00:28:06.62 My chicken's dry as hell. 00:28:06.79,00:28:08.73 Mine's dry as hell, too. 00:28:08.96,00:28:12.12 If you want to be with me tonight,[br]I'll give you my beeper number. 00:28:12.46,00:28:14.52 Really? That'd be great. 00:28:15.53,00:28:18.63 If you're still hungry,[br]I can get the salad from the dog. 00:28:18.80,00:28:21.86 As appealing as that sounds,[br]we really must go. 00:28:22.04,00:28:25.41 We have a lot of sightseeing to do[br]and I added tetanus shot to the list. 00:28:25.61,00:28:30.01 Sorry about the tablecloth. Rusty's[br]never had that reaction to poultry. 00:28:30.75,00:28:32.55 He ain't used to home cooking. 00:28:32.75,00:28:33.65 Are you? 00:28:35.35,00:28:36.51 He's sick. 00:28:36.76,00:28:37.88 Anyway... 00:28:38.39,00:28:39.88 He'll be okay. 00:28:40.06,00:28:41.75 I wish you two could come... 00:28:41.89,00:28:44.76 ...but no room for the kids,[br]so thanks for lunch, and bye. 00:28:44.90,00:28:46.49 Not so fast, Clark. 00:28:46.67,00:28:48.26 I'll get the baby-sitter. 00:28:52.27,00:28:53.26 Hey, kids... 00:28:53.51,00:28:55.77 ...round-up time! 00:29:01.18,00:29:02.34 They'll keep busy. 00:29:03.52,00:29:04.91 Where are we going? 00:29:06.55,00:29:07.64 Hoover Dam! 00:29:07.82,00:29:12.05 Over 1,000 feet wide and[br]727 feet to the bottom. 00:29:12.22,00:29:13.66 Where can I buy bait? 00:29:13.83,00:29:17.73 I love electricity.[br]Eddie says we'll get some soon. 00:29:18.33,00:29:20.49 What a magnificent achievement. 00:29:22.30,00:29:25.46 This is a family vacation.[br]Try to stay with the family. 00:29:25.67,00:29:26.66 Sorry, honey. 00:29:26.91,00:29:30.00 This way, please.[br]The tour is about to start. 00:29:32.41,00:29:33.90 Welcome, everyone. 00:29:34.08,00:29:36.41 I am your dam guide, Arnie. 00:29:36.85,00:29:41.01 I'm about to take you through[br]a fully functioning power plant. 00:29:41.42,00:29:42.75 So please... 00:29:42.92,00:29:45.58 ...no one wander off the dam tour. 00:29:46.02,00:29:49.08 Please, take all the dam pictures[br]you want. 00:29:49.53,00:29:51.52 Now, any dam questions? 00:29:52.26,00:29:54.20 Where can I get some dam bait?! 00:29:56.94,00:29:58.70 This way, please. 00:30:00.21,00:30:01.54 What'd he say? 00:30:01.94,00:30:03.27 This way. 00:30:05.28,00:30:08.61 Don't worry about water leaking[br]through the rocks. It's normal. 00:30:08.78,00:30:10.77 Please, keep up with the tour. 00:30:14.39,00:30:17.55 This is one of the oldest[br]dam tunnels we have. 00:30:20.79,00:30:21.72 Come here! 00:30:23.86,00:30:24.99 Give me your gum. 00:30:25.30,00:30:26.46 From my mouth? 00:30:26.63,00:30:29.29 Any gum! Look what's happening here! 00:30:29.47,00:30:31.13 - Here.[br]- I'll catch up. 00:30:56.60,00:30:57.93 Damn it. 00:31:23.79,00:31:26.12 Where is the damn dam tour? 00:31:29.03,00:31:31.19 Oh, boy. Oh, boy. 00:31:46.81,00:31:51.31 And there are over 100 million tons[br]of cement in these walls. 00:31:55.99,00:31:57.72 Hello. Hello. 00:31:58.32,00:31:59.55 Help! 00:32:20.68,00:32:22.41 It's not that high. 00:32:34.93,00:32:36.52 Okay, here we go. 00:32:36.70,00:32:38.25 Let's see if I've still got it. 00:32:48.11,00:32:50.04 Nice breeze up here. 00:32:52.88,00:32:55.21 That's how a power plant works. 00:32:55.71,00:32:56.87 How? 00:33:06.22,00:33:08.95 This tour gets better every week. 00:33:09.13,00:33:10.62 Fishing's been better. 00:33:10.80,00:33:12.79 Remember when I had that puffer fish? 00:33:39.99,00:33:42.15 Just like in gym. 00:33:42.33,00:33:43.99 One hand at a time. 00:33:49.50,00:33:51.33 Ellen! 00:33:52.17,00:33:53.16 What's that? 00:33:53.34,00:33:56.83 "Oh, beautiful, for spacious skies 00:33:57.61,00:34:00.01 "For amber waves of..." 00:34:03.35,00:34:04.84 Oh, my God! 00:34:07.12,00:34:09.11 Sorry, honey, I'll be right up. 00:34:14.03,00:34:15.29 This is steep. 00:34:15.69,00:34:16.79 Here we go. 00:34:31.61,00:34:32.41 Need help? 00:34:32.48,00:34:33.81 No, I got it. 00:34:36.55,00:34:40.14 That's a workout there, isn't it?[br]Climbed all the way up. 00:34:42.05,00:34:43.88 I almost lost my tag. 00:34:44.49,00:34:46.82 Drinks at the snacketeria, on me. 00:35:13.55,00:35:17.54 I've noticed you're taking more[br]of an interest in the fairer sex. 00:35:18.56,00:35:21.22 There's something your[br]old dad would like to say. 00:35:22.09,00:35:23.25 You see... 00:35:24.00,00:35:25.69 ...there comes a time... 00:35:25.76,00:35:28.53 ...in every young man's[br]life when he enters... 00:35:28.70,00:35:31.69 ...the fragrant garden[br]of beautiful flowers. 00:35:32.27,00:35:35.60 And he wants to enter that garden[br]with a knowledge and... 00:35:35.77,00:35:37.11 ...a mulch... 00:35:37.44,00:35:41.44 ...to let the flowers bloom[br]more brightly, rather than... 00:35:42.01,00:35:43.04 Dad. 00:35:43.21,00:35:43.87 What? 00:35:44.22,00:35:46.55 If this is about sex, I already know. 00:35:47.39,00:35:48.11 You do? 00:35:54.89,00:35:56.12 Good talk, son. 00:35:57.86,00:36:00.85 So what's it going to be tonight?[br]"The Amazing Elvis"? 00:36:01.03,00:36:02.69 "Liberace on Ice"? 00:36:02.87,00:36:06.20 Clark, I don't know.[br]It's been such a long day. 00:36:07.04,00:36:11.98 At Hoover Dam the water level[br]dropped four feet from a flood. 00:36:12.21,00:36:13.64 Thank you. 00:36:16.82,00:36:18.37 Look at this. 00:36:18.65,00:36:20.55 Four tickets to Wayne Newton. 00:36:21.32,00:36:22.88 Wayne Newton?! 00:36:25.49,00:36:26.32 Wayne Newton? 00:36:26.49,00:36:29.39 That's Las Vegas,[br]they never stop giving! 00:36:29.99,00:36:31.39 Hi, for Ellen Griswold? 00:36:31.90,00:36:33.83 I'm Mr. Ellen Griswold. 00:36:45.74,00:36:47.74 "Please wear this tonight. 00:36:47.91,00:36:49.40 "A friend." 00:36:50.75,00:36:52.01 Who's it from? 00:36:52.85,00:36:54.91 I don't know. 00:36:55.52,00:36:57.58 But it's beautiful. 00:37:00.19,00:37:03.59 They really know how to treat[br]their high rollers around here. 00:37:03.76,00:37:05.09 Okay, kids... 00:37:05.26,00:37:07.09 ...inspection in five minutes. 00:37:07.60,00:37:09.69 You heard him! Move it! 00:37:13.81,00:37:18.24 Wayne Newton just happens to be[br]one of America's greatest entertainers. 00:37:19.14,00:37:20.81 He has an effect on women. 00:37:20.98,00:37:23.81 Yes, Griswold, Griswold.[br]Right this way, sir. 00:37:26.32,00:37:27.48 Here... 00:37:28.32,00:37:29.98 ...make the seats good. 00:37:34.59,00:37:37.32 No gratuity is necessary, sir. 00:37:37.50,00:37:39.83 - No, really. Keep it.[br]- Follow me. 00:37:43.17,00:37:44.60 We're in the front row. 00:37:44.77,00:37:46.00 I tipped him. 00:37:46.17,00:37:48.44 "A man knows a moment 00:37:48.61,00:37:50.60 "One wonderful moment 00:37:50.84,00:37:53.50 "When fate takes his hand" 00:37:55.11,00:37:56.67 What energy! 00:37:57.85,00:38:00.01 "My once in a lifetime" 00:38:02.02,00:38:03.11 Thank you. 00:38:03.29,00:38:05.62 You're a magical group of people. 00:38:06.29,00:38:07.62 And, Greg... 00:38:07.79,00:38:10.45 Give me some birds. Let me hear birds. 00:38:21.14,00:38:23.87 "Yes, loving you 00:38:25.14,00:38:28.87 "Is easy 'cause you're beautiful 00:38:30.15,00:38:32.55 "Making love to you 00:38:34.55,00:38:36.04 "Is all I want 00:38:36.22,00:38:38.38 "To do 00:38:39.56,00:38:40.99 "Yes, loving you 00:38:44.00,00:38:47.16 "Has made my life so beautiful 00:38:48.07,00:38:49.90 "And every time that we 00:38:54.74,00:38:57.40 "I'm full of loving...?" 00:38:57.68,00:38:59.34 Mrs. Ellen Griswold. 00:39:00.08,00:39:01.51 Ellen, huh? 00:39:02.58,00:39:06.02 Holy crap,[br]Wayne Newton's hitting on Mom. 00:39:06.42,00:39:08.35 It's all part of the act. 00:39:09.09,00:39:10.08 Now you. 00:39:25.44,00:39:26.53 "No one else" 00:39:26.70,00:39:28.93 I think we know who sent the dress. 00:39:29.11,00:39:31.60 "The colors that you bring" 00:39:32.04,00:39:32.94 You're lucky. 00:39:33.11,00:39:36.21 I've been to every Wayne show[br]for the last 15 years. 00:39:36.38,00:39:39.21 I've never seen him do[br]anything like this. 00:39:40.29,00:39:43.55 "Each day in springtime" 00:39:46.96,00:39:50.72 I'm just saying I've never heard you[br]hit those notes before. 00:39:50.90,00:39:52.12 Don't worry. 00:39:52.30,00:39:55.39 You have nothing to fear[br]from Wayne Newton. He's... 00:39:55.57,00:39:56.90 ...unattainable. 00:39:57.24,00:39:58.79 Did you see him staring at... 00:39:58.97,00:40:00.13 Watch your mouth. 00:40:00.31,00:40:03.07 I think I'll go upstairs[br]and take a bath. 00:40:03.24,00:40:04.30 Not me. 00:40:05.48,00:40:06.74 Anyone for craps? 00:40:06.91,00:40:08.31 We're too young. 00:40:11.08,00:40:12.74 I was once too young. 00:40:13.42,00:40:14.41 Here. 00:40:15.42,00:40:16.65 Take 20 bucks. 00:40:16.82,00:40:18.08 If you need me... 00:40:18.26,00:40:20.99 ...l'll be rolling the dice. 00:40:21.93,00:40:22.92 Have fun, kids. 00:40:23.59,00:40:25.43 - Have a nice night.[br]- See you later. 00:40:29.00,00:40:31.59 Daddy wants a seven! Let's go, seven! 00:40:31.77,00:40:34.17 Seven! A winner! 00:40:34.34,00:40:37.17 Place your bets.[br]Lucky roller coming out. 00:40:37.34,00:40:38.50 Place your bets. 00:40:41.81,00:40:44.98 Let go of me! Let go of me! 00:40:45.75,00:40:47.24 There he is. Clark! 00:40:47.59,00:40:49.25 See, I told you. 00:40:49.69,00:40:51.85 Look out, don't hurt me now. 00:40:52.36,00:40:54.35 Nice place for a pearl necklace. 00:40:54.63,00:40:56.12 Do you know this person? 00:40:56.29,00:40:58.63 Hi, Clark Griswold. Nice to meet you. 00:41:00.20,00:41:02.29 Have you ever swam with dolphins? 00:41:02.50,00:41:04.93 Them things is hard to catch. 00:41:05.10,00:41:07.83 Twelve. Craps. A loser. 00:41:08.04,00:41:10.30 Has anyone ever told you before... 00:41:11.21,00:41:12.30 ...you're bad luck? 00:41:13.34,00:41:15.84 Those were my mother's dying words. 00:41:16.01,00:41:19.45 But when you got your body[br]covered in third-degree burns... 00:41:19.62,00:41:22.52 ...and your foot's in a bear trap,[br]you start talking crazy. 00:41:29.69,00:41:32.63 I've run out of money.[br]Do you cash checks? 00:41:32.80,00:41:34.96 Only if you're staying at the hotel. 00:41:35.13,00:41:36.36 Indeed I am. 00:41:37.47,00:41:39.20 Here we are. 00:41:45.21,00:41:46.80 No problem. 00:41:54.72,00:41:55.98 Good luck. 00:41:56.15,00:41:58.32 Look, Clark, if you're... 00:41:58.49,00:42:01.72 ...thinking about buying me[br]a Cadillac, forget it. 00:42:01.89,00:42:02.72 I won't take it. 00:42:02.93,00:42:04.42 I'm just trying to get even. 00:42:04.93,00:42:07.19 Now where can I do the most damage? 00:42:10.50,00:42:12.49 "Come fly with me 00:42:12.67,00:42:13.83 "Let's fly" 00:42:14.01,00:42:15.91 Shrimp cocktail, 29 cents. 00:42:16.24,00:42:19.23 "If you can use some exotic boo" 00:42:19.74,00:42:21.51 Fake IDs. 00:42:22.08,00:42:22.84 How'd you know? 00:42:23.01,00:42:26.58 When I was your age I needed[br]a water cannon to keep me away... 00:42:26.75,00:42:28.51 ...from the girls. 00:42:28.69,00:42:30.59 Ten bucks. Ten! Ten! 00:42:30.76,00:42:32.09 Shrimp, ladies. 00:42:32.26,00:42:33.75 I need the ten. 00:42:35.03,00:42:36.36 Here. 00:42:36.93,00:42:38.92 Have a good evening, Mr. Morris. 00:42:39.43,00:42:41.02 "That's why..." 00:42:41.20,00:42:41.86 Whatever. 00:42:42.20,00:42:44.60 - Another 21![br]- You nailed her there. 00:42:45.60,00:42:48.13 Let's see. House has 14,[br]and house busts. 00:42:48.54,00:42:50.20 Oh, boy! 00:42:50.37,00:42:52.10 Wendy, you are my lucky charm. 00:42:52.38,00:42:54.87 I don't know what's wrong[br]with me tonight. 00:42:56.05,00:42:57.38 You're rolling. 00:42:57.72,00:42:59.55 Good luck, everybody. 00:43:02.45,00:43:03.72 Good luck, everybody! 00:43:04.72,00:43:05.88 Batter up. 00:43:08.96,00:43:11.45 Big bet for a big man! 00:43:12.23,00:43:14.96 Sure you don't want to save money[br]for the buffet? 00:43:15.13,00:43:15.96 Okay, wise guy. 00:43:16.13,00:43:17.80 Go against three hands. 00:43:20.47,00:43:22.46 This should be sweet. 00:43:22.74,00:43:24.97 Sweet for me. You're finished. 00:43:29.75,00:43:30.98 Straw. 00:43:32.42,00:43:33.91 I'm trying to concentrate.
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