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Friends - 4x14 - The One With Joeys Dirty Day

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I deliver perfection...|and don't brag about it! :D
So what is this?
Googlie Worm.
And this?
Glow Pop Jiggly Jam.
It's so funny!
What's this?
A hunk of sandwich from last year.
Geller's got one hooked!|Looks like a big one!
It's the classic struggle|between man...
Someone knocked over a lamp.
You know what'll be great|about the fishing trip?
When my Dad asks, "What are you|doing with your life?"...
...I can say, "I'm doing a movie|with Charlton Heston."
"What about you?"
Don't stop having fun|just because I'm here.
Kathy didn't cheat on all of you.
Well, except you.
You shouldn't leave Chandler alone.|They broke up only two days ago.
Go fishing next week.
There's nothing I can do.|He's still in his sweats.
That's only phase one.
I'll be back for phase two.|I'd never miss that.
Phase two?
Getting drunk|and going to a strip club.
How does going there|make him better?
There are naked ladies there.
Then to phase three:|Seeing yourself with other women.
There are naked ladies there too.
Would you give me one minute, please?
The One with Joey's Dirty Day
English Subtitles by|GELULA & CO., INC.
These match the jacket|you picked out last week?
There we go.
There it is.
You know what I need?|Gloves.
Brown leather dress gloves.
Well, let's see...
This one is large.
And this one...
Also a large?
Two larges coming right up.
Could I have a moment?
My niece, you see,|is in town from London.
Shropshire, but you know.
She's about your age, I'd say.
Anyway, I have tickets for the opera.|{y:i}Die Fledermaus.
Would you like to keep her|company tonight?
Sure. You got it!
Count me in. Me.|"Fledermaus." Great!
Yes, of course.|Thank you so very much.
- Gloves?|- Sorry, I'll be right back.
Actually, I got to take off.
I was curious.|Do you have plans tonight?
No, nothing!
I invested in a nightclub.|It opens tonight. Want to come?
That would be great!
You're into hard-core S and M, right?
Well, I guess.
I'm kidding.
I'll put you on the V.I.P. List.|Look for me.
Great! You bet.
I'll see you tonight.
- I almost forgot the tickets.|- What?
For you and Emily. Tonight.|{y:i}Die Fledermaus.
Oh, right.
You'll like it.|It has two out of the three tenors.
I can't believe|Kathy did this to me.
I really thought she was the one.
I'll tell you what.
I'm not getting out|of this chair. Ever!
From now on, this chair is the one!
You know what else is the one?|My sweatpants.
Just take the sweats off, okay?
Take them off|and we'll have some fun.
Did you catch any fish?
You guys have no idea.
- You stink!|- Are you kidding?
Three days without a shower.|Plus, I fell in a big tub of worms!
How's he doing?
He hasn't left|that chair in two days.
Hey, buddy, how's it going?
You see? He just needed|his pal to come home.
I got to memorize my lines.
Me and Charlton Heston,|bright and early tomorrow, baby!
What's the matter?
Joshua invited me to this|fancy club opening tonight.
But I already told Mr. Waltham...
...that I would take his niece|to the dumb old opera.
So what are you going to do?
- I don't know.|- No! Help me!
- I can't. I have to work.|- Phoebe?
I would, but I get|my morning sickness in the evening.
Unless she wants to spend the night|holding my hair back for me.
You guys, come on!|I have to meet Joshua.
It's my chance for him|to see the "fun" Rachel.
The "wouldn't it be great|if she were my wife?" Rachel.
Are Joey and Chandler back?
Chandler's still in phase one,|and Joey's that thing you smell.
Come on!
- She's here.|- Wait, wait.
Ross, please?
You want me to take some girl|I've never met to the opera... you can go to a club|and flirt with some guy?
That is a toughie.
She's looking down the hall.
She looked right at me.
You can't see people|through that hole, can you?
I'll be right there!|Okay, Ross, please.
I thought we had moved on.
I thought we could be happy|for each other.
I mean, was that just me?
All right, I'll do it.
Thank you, thank you.
I'm Rachel.
Thank goodness!
There's been a teeny change of plans.|I'm not free tonight...
I must've missed your call, though|I didn't leave the flat all day.
Well, I...
That's not rude.|It's in keeping with the trip...
...where I've been run down|by one of your wiener carts...
...and been strip-searched|at the airport.
Apparently, I look like someone who's|got cocaine stuffed up their bum.
I think you look great.
Good night.|It was very nice to meet you.
I'll get her.
Please, hurry.
Don't you just love|the way they talk?
- What?|- The baby kicked!
No, wait. The elastic|in my underwear busted.
Oh, my God! I overslept!
I was supposed to be|on the set half an hour ago!
You can't go like that!|You stink!
I fell asleep.|Now I don't have time!
Just 10 blocks away.|If I run, I'll make it.
Run 10 blocks.|That'll help the smell.
Slow down!|No, keep moving.
How did it go last night?
Well, I didn't see Joshua.
But I did punch a girl in the face.
The whole night was horrible.|It was pouring.
There was no Rachel Greene on the list.|But there was a Rachel Greep.
So did you get to meet her?
There is no Rachel Greep.|But this girl overheard us.
And she said, "I'm Rachel Greep!"|And he let her in.
So you hit her?
No, she was already in.
This big bitch behind me|tried to steal my umbrella... I clocked her.
All I wanted was a few hours...
...outside of work to see Joshua... he could go ahead and|start falling in love with me.
Honey, that's your name.
That's short for Phoebe? I thought|that's what we called each other.
- You're wearing pants!|- That's right.
Where are the guys? I'm ready|to get drunk and see strippers.
It's 9:30 a.m.
They got a breakfast buffet.
Let me talk to him!
- Oh, my God!|- Can't I just...
- It's my phone and she's shush...|- Please!
What's he saying?
He's with Emily in Vermont.
What? Oh, my God!
Who's Emily?
They're in Vermont?|How did this happen?
How'd he end up in Vermont|with that witch?
Maybe she doesn't hit him|all the time.
{y:i}When we met her...
...she was soaking, her feet were wet.|Who wouldn't be miserable?
With a dry pair of shoes,|she was a totally different person.
There's a deer outside|eating fruit from the orchard!
I got to go! There's a deer|eating fruit from the orchard!
He had to go. There was a deer|eating fruit from the orchard.
I don't get this.|She was horrible!
I'm going to go stand over there.
Why do you care?
I don't care.
I'm just upset that|I'm getting nowhere with Joshua.
You do not just meet someone|and go flitting off to Vermont!
When you first met Barry,|you flitted off to Vail.
Could you, just for once...
...not remember every little thing?
So you know, when's he getting back?
A couple of days.
I knew something|like this would happen.
What are you doing?
You can't go back a phase!
You're thinking about time.|You can't go back in time.
Why don't you do your phase two|strip club thing with us?
We can be guys!
No, you can't.
Let us be guys!|Maybe we want to be guys.
No, you don't. You'd be all|hairy and wouldn't live as long.
Would you just stop being|such a wuss and get those off?
And come with us|and watch naked girls dance!
I'm sorry.
Joey Tribbianni.|I'm here.
Calm down, we got time.|We're running late.
Look at that.|Charlton Heston eating licorice.
Yeah, he loves them.|I've never seen him with...
What the hell is that?|What smells so bad?
I could see why you would think that.|But you know who it is?
No, no. It's Heston.
He reeks like he went on a three-day|fishing trip, then ate licorice.
No way. He's the only one|with a shower in his dressing room.
Really? A shower?
Which room might that be?
The one with "Heston" on it.
I got some ones.|You want to put them in her panties?
No, thanks, Mom!
You have to put that out|because I'm pregnant.
Maybe you and your baby|ought to go to another strip club.
It's not my baby.
Very good.
Really good. I enjoyed it.|Very exotic.
I just checked our messages|and Joshua didn't call.
You'd think he'd be worried|about me not showing up.
You know what makes it worse?
Ross is all happy in Vermont.
Come on, look where you are!
Another round.
Virgin for me.
Don't let me leave without|the name of that carpet guy.
Come on!
You know what?|I'll go home and call Kathy.
If it'll help.
That was a test.|In a few hours, I'll be drunk.
I'll want to call her.|You'll have to stop me.
Then I'll be so drunk,|I'll want to call Janice.
You should! How is she?
I think somebody needs|another lap dance.
Who's in there?
How you doing?
Who in the hell are you?
Would you believe me|if I said I was Kirk Douglas?
Put some pants on, kid,|so I can kick your butt.
No, wait. You don't understand.
I'm an actor.
Joey Tribbiani.|I'm doing a scene with you today.
And I stink!
You're in this picture?
I'm a cop who won't work with you|because you're a loose cannon.
Anyway, I'm really sorry.
But I stink.
Joey, right?
Every actor, one time or another...
Every actor thinks he stinks.
Even Laurence Olivier|sometimes thought he stank.
Bob Redford won't even watch himself.
You don't understand.
Listen to me.
I don't know one actor|worth his salt...
...who, one time in his career,|didn't say, "God, I stink!"
I just did a scene out there.|First take, I stunk the place up.
The important thing,|and you must remember... matter how badly|you think you stink... must never, ever bust into|my dressing room and use my shower!
Do you understand me?
- Yes, sir. I'm very sorry.|- Wait a minute!
Take your pants.
We did okay|at the strip club, right?
Great. Thanks to you,|the hottest waitress is quitting... teach the third grade!
He still hasn't called.
Who, Josh?
It's Joshua.
- He doesn't like "Josh"?|- No, I don't.
I'm going to put my sweats back on.
You know what?|You were right.
We weren't great at being guys.|You know why?
Because we're girls.
You know what girls are good at?
No, listening!
Maybe it would really, really help|if you would just talk.
Yeah, come on.|What's going on in there?
And you know, if you want to cry,|that's okay too.
I'm going to have|to ask you all to leave.
Forget it. We tried,|but phase three is a lost cause.
Those strippers were hot, and I|couldn't picture myself with them.
They really were pretty,|weren't they?
- I liked that fighter pilot one.|- Candy?
She was so spunky!
I think if I were going|to be with a woman...'d be with someone|like Michelle.
She was just so petite.
For me, it would have to be Chantal.
She had the smoothest skin.
When I stuck that dollar in|her G-string and grazed her thigh...
Phase three!|I just achieved phase three!
I am totally picturing you|with all those women!
That's not phase three.
Well, I'm there too!
Are we all together in a group?
Stop it, you're killing me!
I think I moved on to phase four!
What is that?
I don't want a relationship ever!
I just want sex|with strippers and my friends!
Come on.
Let me see that smile.
I don't want to.
I wanted to go to the strip club!
You'll have plenty of chances.
There are thousands of women out there,|just waiting to screw me over.
Yeah, all right.
How was Vermont?
Emily is...
...incredible. There are|no words to describe her.
The whole weekend was like a dream.
And you! Rach!
You were so right.
What you said about us|finally being in a place...
...where we could really|be happy for each other.
I admit, I wasn't quite there.
The thought of you|and that Josh guy...
- Joshua guy at that club,|dancing, having a good time.
And the thought of it kind of...
You know? But now!
But now, I'm totally there.
I'm finally where you are.
Thank goodness!
And thank you for Emily.
No problem.|I'm so glad I could help, you know?
I'm happy for you.
Happy for you.
Oh no, happy for you.
All right. Here's what we'll do.
You are going to take off|my clothes.
You two, go get the oils.
And you, just constantly scream...
..."Chandler's the king!|Chandler's the king!"
I want to be with her.|I like her.
That's fine.|Go with your instincts!
What am I doing again?
Pay attention.|I could wake up at any moment.
I'm Joshua.|I'm here to pick up Rachel.
That's not Joshua.
What do you want from me?|I never met the guy.
I'm sorry you can't stay.
The rest of us|have a lot of work to do.
What are you doing?
All right, listen.|I got to wake up.
Face 2004
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Fail Safe
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Fallen Angels 1995
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Family Guy 01x01 - Death Has a Shadow
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Friends - 3x21 - The One With a Chick and a Duck
Friends - 3x22 - The One With the Screamer
Friends - 3x23 - The One With Rosss Thing
Friends - 3x24 - The One With Ultimate Fighting Champ
Friends - 3x25 - The One at the Beach
Friends - 4x01 - The One With the Jellyfish
Friends - 4x02 - The One With the Cat
Friends - 4x03 - The One With the Cuffs
Friends - 4x04 - The One With the Ballroom Dancing
Friends - 4x05 - The One With Joeys New Girlfriend
Friends - 4x06 - The One With the Dirty Girl
Friends - 4x07 - The One Where Chandler Crosses
Friends - 4x08 - The One With Chandler in a Box
Friends - 4x09 - The One Where They are Going
Friends - 4x10 - The One With the Girl from
Friends - 4x11 - The One With Phoebes Uterus
Friends - 4x12 - The One With the Embryos
Friends - 4x13 - The One With Rachels Crush
Friends - 4x14 - The One With Joeys Dirty Day
Friends - 4x15 - The One With All the Rugby
Friends - 4x16 - The One With the Fake Party
Friends - 4x17 - The One With the Free Porn
Friends - 4x18 - The One With Rachels New Dress
Friends - 4x19 - The One With All the Haste
Friends - 4x20 - The One With All the Wedding Dresses
Friends - 4x21 - The One With the Invitation
Friends - 4x22 - The One With the Worst Best Man Ever
Friends - 4x23 - The One With Rosss Wedding - part 1
Friends - 4x24 - The One With Rosss Wedding - part 2
Friends - 5x01 - The One After Ross Says Rachel
Friends - 5x02 - The One With All the Kissing
Friends - 5x03 - The One Hundreth
Friends - 5x04 - The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS
Friends - 5x05 - The One With the Kips
Friends - 5x06 - The One With the Yeti
Friends - 5x07 - The One Where Ross Moves In
Friends - 5x08 - The One With All the Thanksgivins
Friends - 5x09 - The One With Rosss Sandwich
Friends - 5x10 - The One With the Inappropiate Sister
Friends - 5x11 - The One With All the Resolutions
Friends - 5x12 - The One With Chandlers Work Laugh
Friends - 5x13 - The One With Joeys Bag
Friends - 5x14 - The One Where Everyone Finds Out
Friends - 5x15 - The One With the Girl Who Hits Joey
Friends - 5x16 - The One With the Cop
Friends - 5x17 - The One With Rachels
Friends - 5x18 - The One Where Rachel Smokes
Friends - 5x19 - The One Where Ross Cant Flirt
Friends - 5x20 - The One With the Ride-Along
Friends - 5x21 - The One With the Ball
Friends - 5x22 - The One With Joeys Big Break
Friends - 5x23 - The One in Vegas
Friends - 6x01 - The One After Vegas
Friends - 6x02 - The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel
Friends - 6x03 - The One With Rosss Denial
Friends - 6x04 - The One Where Joey Loses His
Friends - 6x05 - The One With Joeys Porsche
Friends - 6x06 - The One On the Last Night
Friends - 6x07 - The One Where Phoebe Runs
Friends - 6x08 - The One With Rosss Teeth
Friends - 6x15
Friends 7x01 - The One with Monicas Thunder
Friends 7x02 - The One With Rachels Book
Friends 7x03 - The One With Phoebes Cookies
Friends 7x04 - The One With Rachels Assistant
Friends 7x05 - The One With The Engagement Picture
Friends 7x06 - The One With The Nap Partners
Friends 7x07 - The One with Rosss Library Book
Friends 7x08 - The One Where Chandler Doesnt Like Dogs
Friends 7x09 - The One With All the Candy
Friends 7x10 - The One With The Holiday Armadillo
Friends 7x11 - The One With All The Cheesecakes
Friends 7x12 - The One Where They are Up All Night
Friends 7x13 - The One Where Rosita Dies
Friends 7x14 - The One Where They All Turn Thirty
Friends 7x15 - The One With Joeys New Brain
Friends 7x16 - The One With the Truth About London
Friends 7x17 - The One With the Cheap Wedding Dress
Friends 7x18 - The One With Joeys Award
Friends 7x19 - The One With Ross and Monicas Cousin
Friends 7x20 - The One With Rachels Kisses
Friends 7x21 - The One With the Vows
Friends 7x22 - The One With Chandlers Dad
Friends 7x23 - The One With Monica and Chandlers Wedding Part 1
Friends 7x24 - The One With Monica and Chandlers Wedding Part 2
Friends 9x01 - The One Where No One Proposes
Friends 9x02 - The One Where Emma Cries
Friends 9x03 - The One With The Pediatrician
Friends 9x04 - The One With The Sharks
Friends 9x05 - The One With Phoebes Birthday Dinner
Friends 9x06 - The One With The Male Nanny
Friends 9x07 - The One With Rosss Inappropriate Song
Friends 9x08 - The One With Rachels Other Sister
Friends 9x09 - The One With Rachels Phone Number
Friends 9x10 - The One With Christmas In Tulsa
Friends 9x11 - The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work
Friends 9x12 - The One With Phoebes Rats
Friends 9x13 - The One Where Monica Sings
Friends 9x14 - The One With The Blind Dates
Friends 9x15 - The One With The Mugging
Friends 9x16 - The One With The Boob Job
Friends 9x17 - The One With The Memorial Service
Friends 9x18 - The One With The Lottery
Friends 9x19 - The One With Rachels Dream
Friends 9x20 - The One With The Soap Opera Party
Friends 9x21 - The One With The Fertility Test
Friends 9x22 - The One With The Donor
Friends 9x23-24 - The One In Barbados 1 2)
Frisson des vampires Le
From Beijing with love
From Dusk Till Dawn
From Dusk Till Dawn 3 The Hangmans Daughter
From Hell
From Justin To Kelly (Special Edition)
Frontera La
Frusta e il corpo La
Fucking Amal
Fudoh The New Generation 1996
Fugitive The - The Chase Continues
Fugitives (2000)
Fukssvansen (Chop Chop)
Full Frontal 2002
Full Metal Jacket
Full Time Killer
Fun Movie (2002 Korean) CD1
Fun Movie (2002 Korean) CD2
Fun in Acapulco (Richard Thorpe 1963)
Funeral Parade of Roses
Funeral in Berlin
Funny Girl
Fuochi dArtifizio
Furia (2002)
Fury The (1978)
Futurama 1x01 - Space Pilot 3000
Futurama 1x02 - The Series Has Landed
Futurama 1x03 - I Roommate
Futurama 1x04 - Loves Labors Lost in Space
Futurama 1x05 - Fear of a Bot Planet
Futurama 1x06 - A Fishful of Dollars
Futurama 1x07 - My Three Suns
Futurama 1x08 - A Big Piece of Garbage
Futurama 1x09 - Hell is Other Robots
Futurama 2x01 - A Flight to Remember
Futurama 2x02 - Mars University
Futurama 2x03 - When Aliens Attack
Futurama 2x04 - Fry and the Slurm Factory
Futurama 3x01 - Amazon Women in the Mood
Futurama 3x02 - Parasites Lost
Futurama 3x03 - A Tale of Two Santas
Futurama 3x04 - The Luck of the Fryrish
Futurama 3x05 - The Birdbot of Ice-catraz
Futurama 3x06 - Bendless Love
Futurama 3x07 - The Day the Earth Stood Stupid
Futurama 3x08 - Thats Lobstertainment
Futurama 3x09 - The Cyber House Rules
Futurama 3x10 - Insane in the Mainframe
Futurama 3x10 - Where The Buggalo Roam
Futurama 3x12 - The Route of All Evil
Futurama 3x13 - Bendin in the Wind
Futurama 3x14 - Time Keeps on Slippin
Futurama 3x15 - I Dated a Robot
Futurama 3x16 - A Leela of Her Own
Futurama 3x17 - A Pharaoh To Remember
Futurama 3x18 - Anthology of Interest Part 2
Futurama 3x19 - Roswell That Ends Well
Futurama 3x20 - Godfellas
Futurama 3x21 - Future Stock
Futurama 3x22 - The 30 Iron Chef
Futurama 4x01 - Kif Gets Knocked Up a Notch
Futurama 4x02 - Leelas Homeworld
Futurama 4x03 - Love and Rocket
Futurama 4x04 - Less Than Hero
Futurama 4x05 - A Taste of Freedom
Futurama 4x06 - Bender Should Not Be Allowed on TV
Futurama 4x07 - Jurassic Bark
Futurama 4x08 - Crimes of the Hot
Futurama 4x09 - Teenage Mutant Leelas Hurdles
Futurama 4x10 - The Why of Fry
Futurama 4x11 - Where no Fan Has Gone Before
Futurama 4x12 - The Sting
Futurama 4x13 - Bend Her
Futurama 4x14 - Obsoletely Fabulous
Futurama 4x15 - The Farnsworth Parabox
Futurama 4x16 - Three Hundred Big Boys
Futurama 4x17 - Spanish Fry
Futurama 4x18 - The Devils Hands are Idle Playthings
Fyra Nyanser Av Brunt CD1
Fyra Nyanser Av Brunt CD2