Futurama 4x11 - Where no Fan Has Gone Before
SHATNER:
Shatner's log, airdate unknown.
The impossible has happened.
It would take days to recount
the events I've witnessed, so settle in.
It all began--
Quiet, you! This court-martial
is now in session.
The honorably sexy
Zapp Brannigan residing.
Bring in the accused!
Oh, my.
Philip J. Fry, you stand accused
of traveling. . .
. . .to the forbidden planet Omega 3. . .
. . .a crime punishable by 1 2 concurrent
death sentences.
Do you understand the charges?
One beep for yes, two beeps for no.
Yes. So noted. Do you plead guilty?
Double yes. Guilty! I will now carry
out the sentence. Kif, my gun.
Wait! He pled not guilty!
Order! Order in the court!
Very well then, Mr. Fry. Please recount
the events that led you to be guilty.
The professor said he was taking a nap,
so we have time for six movies.
Let's take these six Jim Carrey
movies and record over them!
You know what six movies
average out to be good?
The first six Star Trek movies!
[GASPING]
Everybody hit the deck!
Shh! Those words are forbidden.
What words? Star Trek?
-Shh!
-Shut your gills!
[SIREN WAILING]
That sound, it's patrol car 71 8!
Hide him!
[BENDER HUMMING]
The court is intrigued.
Perhaps we could hear more
about these forbidden words. . .
. . .from someone with
a sexily seductive voice.
With pleasure. You see, the show
was banned after the Star Trek Wars.
You mean the vast migration
of Star Wars fans?
No. That was the Star Wars Trek.
By the 23rd century,
Star Trek fandom had evolved. . .
...from a loose association of nerds with
skin problems into a full-blown religion.
And Scotty beamed them
to the Klingon ship. . .
. . .where they would be no tribble at all.
All power to the engines.
NICHOLS:
As countries fell under its influence...
... world leaders were threatened
by the movement's power.
And so the Trekkies were executed
in the manner most befitting virgins.
He's dead, Jim.
He's dead, Jim.
He's dead, Jim.
KELLEY:
Finally, the sacred texts were banned.
TAKEl: The last copies of the 79
episodes and six movies were dumped...
...on the forbidden world Omega 3...
...along with that blooper reel where
the door doesn 't close all the way.
Thus, Star Trek was forever
scoured from human memory.
Another classic science-fiction show
cancelled before its time.
[TSKS]
I've never heard of such a brutal
and shocking injustice. . .
. . .that I cared so little about.
Next witness!
Bender the Robot,
please take the stand.
She's all yours, buddy.
I'd only met the defendant, Fry,
once, but I knew he was up to no good.
Please use the beeps.
Oh.
Mr. Nimoy! I came as soon as I heard
what happened centuries ago.
I can't believe your show was banned!
I have absolutely no idea
what you're talking about.
[BEEPING]
You know, 1 966?
79 episodes, about 30 good ones.
Oh, really! I've done too many things
to remember one particular TV series. . .
. . .but if you want to discuss
my books of poetry--
Remember that episode where you got
high on spores and smacked Kirk around?
No. Perhaps you're thinking
of my one-man show. . .
. . .about Vincent van Spock?
I mean, van Gogh. Damn!
Aha! You can't escape it!
Oh, you're right, I can't.
[SOBBING]
Uh. . . . Jeez, don't get upset.
I mean, okay,
I outwitted you, but--
No, it's my fellow cast members.
300 years ago, they left Earth behind.
This planet doesn't appreciate
us anymore, Leonard.
Bill, you are and always
shall be my friend.
But I just signed a six-month lease
on my apartment.
I can't walk away from
a commitment like that.
Farewell, my friend.
Oh.
[SOBBING]
Why did the world turn its back
on our obvious greatness?
I'm literally angry with rage!
Your co-stars may be gone, but we can
still get those episode tapes back. . .
-. . .for the whole world to see! Come on!
NIMOY: Oh.
Yes! Front row!
You can't go to Omega 3.
It's forbidden. I forbid you!
We have to! The world needs Star Trek
to give people hope for the future.
But it's set 800 years in the past.
Yeah! Why is this so important to you?
'Cause it taught me so much.
Like how you should accept people,
whether they be black, white. . .
. . .Klingon, or even female.
But most importantly,
when I didn't have any friends. . .
. . .it made me feel like maybe I did.
Well, that is touchingly pathetic.
I guess I can't let you go alone.
I'll go too. With Leonard's
permission, of course.
We're entering the Omega System.
SPEAKER VOICE: Warning.
You are now in forbidden space.
Forbidden, schmur-schmidden.
What are they gonna do, write a letter?
I'm so scared!
I've lost control of the ship!
[SCREAMING]
Oh, dip!
Dip, indeed.
FRY:
It's all stuff from that forbidden show.
So many cardboard sets, so
many memories. If only the others--
SHATNER:
I guess that's my cue.
-Bill!
-L-dog!
-Hey! This is wonderful!
-Oh, man!
-I feel like hugging you.
-Well, I would, except you have no body.
And we're both men.
NIMOY:
Nichelle! George! Walter!
-DeForest! Welshie!
-Welshie?
We did some musical
reunion specials in the 2200s.
But the guy who played Scotty
had trouble yodeling.
Ever since then, Welshie has been
a welcome participant in our escapades.
[GARBLING]
I can't believe it!
How'd you all end up here?
We were going to Welshie's cousin's
house to stay in the guest room. . .
. . .when our ship was pulled down to this
planet and crashed, just like yours.
-When we woke up, we had bodies.
-Say it in Russian.
Ven vee voke up,
vee had these wah-dies.
-Now say "nuclear wessels" !
-No!
We love it here. Everything is provided
for us and we never age.
Check out these abs.
-Yowsa!
-But who's doing all this for you?
You know, we never thought about it.
We're famous, we're used
to this sort of treatment.
MELLLVAR:
It is l!
Whoa! What a cheesy effect!
MELLLVAR:
I'm not an effect!
-You doubt my power?
-I do!
Aye!
[MELLLVAR LAUGHING]
Welshie!
This court will now hear some
very sensual testimony. . .
. . .from this court's ex-lover,
Turanga Leela.
Go * * * * yourself.
Behold, another power!
Different from the one you saw earlier.
Hey! A body! Buff, tan.
Yeah, this is mine, all right.
All right, you gas, what's the deal?
Centuries ago, the videotaped
adventures of the Enterprise crew. . .
. . .rained down upon my planet.
Over and over, I watched them.
Especially the five
with the energy beings.
I am MeIllvar, Seer of the Tapes!
Knower of the Episodes!
Tremble before my encyclopedic
knowledge of Star Trek!
Tremble? I laugh. Nobody knows
more about Star Trek than me!
I beg to differ!
Long have I waited for the one who
played Spock. At last, we can begin.
Cool! A Star Trek convention!
MeIllvar, can you give us some idea
how long this is going to last?
Until time stops.
ALL: What?
-You can't do this!
Now, we have a full schedule of events.
-Can people who hate Star Trek leave?
-Good question.
-No, you have to stay even longer!
-Oh!
[SNORING]
Sign it to MeIllvar.
MeIllvar has three L's.
I think I've done enough conventions
to know how to spell MeIllvar.
-Say "nerd" !
ALL: Nerd!
I'm Slim Shady.
Yes, I'm the real Shady.
All you other Slim Shadys
are just imitating.
So won't the real Slim Shady
please stand up?
Please stand up? Please stand up?
How can you do a spoken word
version of a rap song?
He found a way.
For 1 00 quatloos, who did the
captain maroon on Ceti Alpha V?
Khan!
-Uh, Khan?
-Correct!
My button has broken!
The trivia contest has ended.
I now have a surprise.
You will perform a fan script
written by the ultimate Trek fan!
You have my fan script?
I meant me! MeIllvar's the ultimate fan!
Oh, I was confused because the
scoreboard says something different.
Trivia contest over! Take your scripts!
We have limited rehearsal time.
Now, I didn't make enough
copies of the script. . .
. . .so George and Walter
will have to share.
You probably don't want us to see you
rehearsing, or it'll give away the ending.
That's right!
The ending must not be ruined!
-We'll go wait in the ship.
-Okay.
Not till I get my 600 quatloos!
This is wrong. We shouldn't have
abandoned them there.
I'm feeling pretty good about it.
I didn't want to leave them either,
but what were we supposed to do?
Usually on the show, someone would
come up with a complicated plan. . .
. . .then explain it with a simple analogy.
Hmm. If we can re-route engine power
through the primary weapons. . .
. . .and reconfigure them
to MeIllvar's frequency. . .
. . .that should overload
his electro-quantum structure.
Like putting too much air in a balloon!
Of course! It's so simple!
Alas, my ship, whom I love
like a woman, is disabled.
Oh, Lord.
Fascinating, captain, and logical too.
Yet, we need some help.
Look, captain! MeIllvar will help us.
Captain, I wope he will welp our vessel.
Wessel!
You're not acting hard enough!
MeIllvar, you have to respect
your actors.
When I directed Star Trek IV,
I got a magnificent performance. . .
. . .out of Bill because I respected him.
And when I directed Star Trek V, I got a
magnificent performance out of me. . .
. . .because I respected me so much!
Okay! I'm done re-ca-foobelling
the energy motron, or whatever!
Fire!
My, what a handsome energy
creature you are! I love you.
[MELLLVAR SCREAMING]
Hey, you wrote it!
[FRY SCREAMS]
It's not working! He's drawing
strength from our weapons!
Like a balloon,
and something bad happens!
[MELLLVAR SCREAMS]
[SCREAMING]
BENDER:
Yep.
So how's rehearsal going?
Lousy. Here I've been admiring
a bunch of actors while you. . .
. . .a crew of genuine space heroes,
risked your lives to save them.
Hey, we've done heroic things too.
Yeah! ln the third season,
I kissed Shatner.
Silence! My whole world has turned
upside down. I have but one option.
-Keep them and let us go?
-No!
To determine who is more worthy
of my fanatical devotion. . .
. . .I shall pit you against each other
in armed combat. . .
. . .to the death!
Where'd you get an idiotic idea like that?
Episodes 1 9, 46, 56 and 77.
Great list, except you forgot episode 66!
[CHUCKLING]
I was getting to that one!
[MELLLVAR SCREAMS]
So MeIllvar ordered a battle to the death.
I assume no one survived.
[SIGHS]
Can we get on with this?
My foot's getting tired.
This will be your standard battle
to the death.
The only weapons,
whatever you can find.
But I warn you, do nothing until
I have signaled the start of combat.
Okay, start.
[GASPING]
I don't have much experience at fighting,
except with you guys.
I have an idea. Wasn't there an episode
where I threw my shoe at the enemy?
You mean Doohan?
Whoever it was, I did it like this.
-Ow!
-My foot's cold.
There, we can make these into spears.
We can tie caterpillars together to make
bowstrings for bows and arrows.
And we can use this machine gun
to shoot them!
Yee-haa!
[CLICKING]
Ha-ha. That was fun.
What if I distract them
with my famous fan dance?
That's good, good. And then, George,
you give them a karate chop.
I find that offensive.
Just because I'm of Japanese ancestry,
you assume I know karate.
Have I ever led you to believe
I have studied karate?
Well, no. But you never
talk about yourself.
Maybe if you showed a little interest.
Well, here goes nothing.
[SCREAMING]
Hello, boys.
Oh!
Hi-ya!
[BENDER SCREAMS]
-There's no right way to hit a woman.
-Then do it the wrong way.
Fine.
[SCREAMS]
Is that all you got?
Ow!
-Come on, Walter!
-Take that!
That hurts!
Let's see if this actually works. Hmm.
Ow! Ow! Ow!
My face!
Ow! My face too!
May l?
MELLLVAR:
Excellent, excellent.
Leela, please.
This is exactly what MeIllvar wants.
We're just pawns in his
diabolical game of checkers.
Can't we resolve our differences
some other way?
MOTHER:
MeIllvar! Dinnertime!
But, Mom, I'm playing
with my collectibles!
-Now!
-Uh. . . .
All this time we thought he was
a powerful super being. . .
. . .yet he was just a child.
He's not a child! He's 34!
All right, Koenig!
I've wanted to do this for years!
Bender, wait! This is our chance to
escape before MeIllvar comes back!
But we all need to work together.
I love you so much.
NIMOY:
Hello?
-We've decided to work together.
-So did they.
Now, how do we escape?
We can't use our ship. We have life
support, but the engines are wrecked.
Ironic, because our engines work,
but our life-support systems don't.
Hey, if your engines work. . . .
And your life-support systems work. . . .
Stop! You're just going around in circles!
Think, Fry, think.
Everyone's depending on you.
We're too heavy! You guys need
to lose some weight, fast!
Look, Leonard, we're light enough
to keep the tapes! lsn't that great?
I'm living in a gefilte-fish jar.
We did it!
[CHEERING]
[MELLLVAR CHUCKLING]
[SCREAMING]
MeIllvar's got a spaceship!
Yes! ln mint condition, and you
made me take it out of the package!
The Nimbus! We're saved!
You're under arrest!
Prepare to be boarded.
So I boarded you, huh?
What happened next?
You started this stupid court-martial!
If you don't mind,
we're still fighting MeIllvar.
One more hit and we're done for!
Let's take him out with us.
Do you have a self-destruct code?
Like destruct sequence 1 -A, 2-B, 3--
Thanks a lot, Takei.
Now everybody knows!
If I can 't have the original cast of
Star Trek, no one will. Prepare to die!
Wait! lf they mean that much to you,
why would you kill them?
Because l.... I....
I don 't know
what I'd do without them.
MeIllvar, you can't let
a TV show be your whole life.
You can do anything you want.
Look at Walter Koenig.
After Star Trek, he became an actor.
Not just an actor,
but a well-rounded person. . .
. . .with my own friends
and credit cards and keys.
Well, I guess I could move out
of my parent's basement...
...maybe get a temp job.
Whoa. Whoa! One step at a time.
I thank you, Fry. You know,
you and I are of a kind.
In a different reality,
I could have called you "friend. "
Episode 1 0: "Balance of Terror. "
More like episode nine, loser!
In your face! Victory is mine!
[MELLLVAR LAUGHING]
I wonder, my friends, was he really
such an evil energy gas?
He did give us eternal youth.
24-hour Laundromat.
A full assortment of rum,
both spiced and regular.
Truly, it was a paradise.
And all you had to put up with was
one really annoying Star Trek fan.
Let's get the hell out of here. |
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3x08 - The One With the Giant Poking Device Friends - 3x09 - The One With the Football Friends - 3x10 - The One Where Rachel Quits Friends - 3x11 - The One Where Chandler Cant Remember Friends - 3x12 - The One With All the Jealousy Friends - 3x13 - The One Where Monica and Richard Friends - 3x14 - The One With Phoebes Ex-Partner Friends - 3x15 - The One Where Ross and Rachel Take Friends - 3x16 - The One the Morning After Friends - 3x17 - The One Without the Ski Trip Friends - 3x18 - The One With the Hypnosis Tape Friends - 3x19 - The One With the Tiny T-Shirt Friends - 3x20 - The One With the Dollhouse Friends - 3x21 - The One With a Chick and a Duck Friends - 3x22 - The One With the Screamer Friends - 3x23 - The One With Rosss Thing Friends - 3x24 - The One With Ultimate Fighting Champ Friends - 3x25 - The One at the Beach Friends - 4x01 - The One With the Jellyfish Friends - 4x02 - The One With the Cat Friends - 4x03 - The One With the Cuffs Friends - 4x04 - The One With the Ballroom Dancing Friends - 4x05 - The One With Joeys New Girlfriend Friends - 4x06 - The One With the Dirty Girl Friends - 4x07 - The One Where Chandler Crosses Friends - 4x08 - The One With Chandler in a Box Friends - 4x09 - The One Where They are Going Friends - 4x10 - The One With the Girl from Friends - 4x11 - The One With Phoebes Uterus Friends - 4x12 - The One With the Embryos Friends - 4x13 - The One With Rachels Crush Friends - 4x14 - The One With Joeys Dirty Day Friends - 4x15 - The One With All the Rugby Friends - 4x16 - The One With the Fake Party Friends - 4x17 - The One With the Free Porn Friends - 4x18 - The One With Rachels New Dress Friends - 4x19 - The One With All the Haste Friends - 4x20 - The One With All the Wedding Dresses Friends - 4x21 - The One With the Invitation Friends - 4x22 - The One With the Worst Best Man Ever Friends - 4x23 - The One With Rosss Wedding - part 1 Friends - 4x24 - The One With Rosss Wedding - part 2 Friends - 5x01 - The One After Ross Says Rachel Friends - 5x02 - The One With All the Kissing Friends - 5x03 - The One Hundreth Friends - 5x04 - The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS Friends - 5x05 - The One With the Kips Friends - 5x06 - The One With the Yeti Friends - 5x07 - The One Where Ross Moves In Friends - 5x08 - The One With All the Thanksgivins Friends - 5x09 - The One With Rosss Sandwich Friends - 5x10 - The One With the Inappropiate Sister Friends - 5x11 - The One With All the Resolutions Friends - 5x12 - The One With Chandlers Work Laugh Friends - 5x13 - The One With Joeys Bag Friends - 5x14 - The One Where Everyone Finds Out Friends - 5x15 - The One With the Girl Who Hits Joey Friends - 5x16 - The One With the Cop Friends - 5x17 - The One With Rachels Friends - 5x18 - The One Where Rachel Smokes Friends - 5x19 - The One Where Ross Cant Flirt Friends - 5x20 - The One With the Ride-Along Friends - 5x21 - The One With the Ball Friends - 5x22 - The One With Joeys Big Break Friends - 5x23 - The One in Vegas Friends - 6x01 - The One After Vegas Friends - 6x02 - The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel Friends - 6x03 - The One With Rosss Denial Friends - 6x04 - The One Where Joey Loses His Friends - 6x05 - The One With Joeys Porsche Friends - 6x06 - The One On the Last Night Friends - 6x07 - The One Where Phoebe Runs Friends - 6x08 - The One With Rosss Teeth Friends - 6x15 Friends 7x01 - The One with Monicas Thunder Friends 7x02 - The One With Rachels Book Friends 7x03 - The One With Phoebes Cookies Friends 7x04 - The One With Rachels Assistant Friends 7x05 - The One With The Engagement Picture Friends 7x06 - The One With The Nap Partners Friends 7x07 - The One with Rosss Library Book Friends 7x08 - The One Where Chandler Doesnt Like Dogs Friends 7x09 - The One With All the Candy Friends 7x10 - The One With The Holiday Armadillo Friends 7x11 - The One With All The Cheesecakes Friends 7x12 - The One Where They are Up All Night Friends 7x13 - The One Where Rosita Dies Friends 7x14 - The One Where They All Turn Thirty Friends 7x15 - The One With Joeys New Brain Friends 7x16 - The One With the Truth About London Friends 7x17 - The One With the Cheap Wedding Dress Friends 7x18 - The One With Joeys Award Friends 7x19 - The One With Ross and Monicas Cousin Friends 7x20 - The One With Rachels Kisses Friends 7x21 - The One With the Vows Friends 7x22 - The One With Chandlers Dad Friends 7x23 - The One With Monica and Chandlers Wedding Part 1 Friends 7x24 - The One With Monica and Chandlers Wedding Part 2 Friends 9x01 - The One Where No One Proposes Friends 9x02 - The One Where Emma Cries Friends 9x03 - The One With The Pediatrician Friends 9x04 - The One With The Sharks Friends 9x05 - The One With Phoebes Birthday Dinner Friends 9x06 - The One With The Male Nanny Friends 9x07 - The One With Rosss Inappropriate Song Friends 9x08 - The One With Rachels Other Sister Friends 9x09 - The One With Rachels Phone Number Friends 9x10 - The One With Christmas In Tulsa Friends 9x11 - The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work Friends 9x12 - The One With Phoebes Rats Friends 9x13 - The One Where Monica Sings Friends 9x14 - The One With The Blind Dates Friends 9x15 - The One With The Mugging Friends 9x16 - The One With The Boob Job Friends 9x17 - The One With The Memorial Service Friends 9x18 - The One With The Lottery Friends 9x19 - The One With Rachels Dream Friends 9x20 - The One With The Soap Opera Party Friends 9x21 - The One With The Fertility Test Friends 9x22 - The One With The Donor Friends 9x23-24 - The One In Barbados 1 2) Frisson des vampires Le From Beijing with love From Dusk Till Dawn From Dusk Till Dawn 3 The Hangmans Daughter From Hell From Justin To Kelly (Special Edition) Frontera La Frusta e il corpo La Fucking Amal Fudoh The New Generation 1996 Fugitive The - The Chase Continues Fugitives (2000) Fukssvansen (Chop Chop) Full Frontal 2002 Full Metal Jacket Full Time Killer Fun Movie (2002 Korean) CD1 Fun Movie (2002 Korean) CD2 Fun in Acapulco (Richard Thorpe 1963) Funeral Parade of Roses Funeral in Berlin Funny Girl Fuochi dArtifizio Furia (2002) Fury The (1978) Futurama 1x01 - Space Pilot 3000 Futurama 1x02 - The Series Has Landed Futurama 1x03 - I Roommate Futurama 1x04 - Loves Labors Lost in Space Futurama 1x05 - Fear of a Bot Planet Futurama 1x06 - A Fishful of Dollars Futurama 1x07 - My Three Suns Futurama 1x08 - A Big Piece of Garbage Futurama 1x09 - Hell is Other Robots Futurama 2x01 - A Flight to Remember Futurama 2x02 - Mars University Futurama 2x03 - When Aliens Attack Futurama 2x04 - Fry and the Slurm Factory Futurama 3x01 - Amazon Women in the Mood Futurama 3x02 - Parasites Lost Futurama 3x03 - A Tale of Two Santas Futurama 3x04 - The Luck of the Fryrish Futurama 3x05 - The Birdbot of Ice-catraz Futurama 3x06 - Bendless Love Futurama 3x07 - The Day the Earth Stood Stupid Futurama 3x08 - Thats Lobstertainment Futurama 3x09 - The Cyber House Rules Futurama 3x10 - Insane in the Mainframe Futurama 3x10 - Where The Buggalo Roam Futurama 3x12 - The Route of All Evil Futurama 3x13 - Bendin in the Wind Futurama 3x14 - Time Keeps on Slippin Futurama 3x15 - I Dated a Robot Futurama 3x16 - A Leela of Her Own Futurama 3x17 - A Pharaoh To Remember Futurama 3x18 - Anthology of Interest Part 2 Futurama 3x19 - Roswell That Ends Well Futurama 3x20 - Godfellas Futurama 3x21 - Future Stock Futurama 3x22 - The 30 Iron Chef Futurama 4x01 - Kif Gets Knocked Up a Notch Futurama 4x02 - Leelas Homeworld Futurama 4x03 - Love and Rocket Futurama 4x04 - Less Than Hero Futurama 4x05 - A Taste of Freedom Futurama 4x06 - Bender Should Not Be Allowed on TV Futurama 4x07 - Jurassic Bark Futurama 4x08 - Crimes of the Hot Futurama 4x09 - Teenage Mutant Leelas Hurdles Futurama 4x10 - The Why of Fry Futurama 4x11 - Where no Fan Has Gone Before Futurama 4x12 - The Sting Futurama 4x13 - Bend Her Futurama 4x14 - Obsoletely Fabulous Futurama 4x15 - The Farnsworth Parabox Futurama 4x16 - Three Hundred Big Boys Futurama 4x17 - Spanish Fry Futurama 4x18 - The Devils Hands are Idle Playthings Fyra Nyanser Av Brunt CD1 Fyra Nyanser Av Brunt CD2
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