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Men Make Women Crazy Theory

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So I really like Nick.
Good!
Been a long time since I felt this way about someone.
You know, when you know you can really be with somebody?
For real?
That's how I feel with him.
So what is he like?
- Really cute. - Yeah, he really is cute.
Will you pass me that?
- What? - Pasta.
You like overly good-Iooking guys though.
That's not true.
I went out with an ugly guy, once.
He screwed me over too so...
I thought: Good looking guys is what I say.
What did you do last night?
He picked me up in his car.
It was such a nice night.
He... took me to dinner at Amalfi. Can I taste some of this?
And he ordered the best wine.
I was too embarrassed to ask what wine it was,
but it was really good.
He knows about those things.
He was so cool through dinner, holding my hand,
talking about... stuff!
Taste my real pasta that I'm making.
Talking about things like...
He was in China during that whole reunification thing.
I'm obsessed with the Chinese, right.
Isn't that weird?
So then, right...
Excuse me.
- Am I in your way or...? - No, go on.
Right like... an hour into dinner,
his cellphone rings.
He has some emergency or something.
He was real cool and suave. He takes me back to his apartment.
Tells me to make myself at home and I hung out
for a couple of... You know, a while.
- Hang on. - He does his thing, comes back...
You waited for him at his apartment?
- Yeah. - How long?
Not very long, a couple of hours.
A couple of hours?
It's so nice, his apartment.
What was the emergency?
He doesn't have a roommate.
I don't know. Something to do with work.
This guy's really successful.
Look, Chloe.
Listen.
He has his cellphone during your date, which he answers.
Then he drops you off at his house
and you wait for him...
I mean, this guy sounds a little... you know, self-involved.
What are we doing tonight?
I should buy it and surprise him
with it at dinner.
Or should I just get it and wait?
- Hi. - Hey.
What's up?
Did he call?
It's only been a day.
- It's fine. Just chill out. - I know.
Look, this guy's making you crazy.
I can't stand having a roommate anymore.
Maybe Nick and I will move in together soon.
Hey, Chloe.
- Hey, Andrew! - We match!
Oh yeah.
I like your hair like that.
Like this? It's always such a mess.
I like women who don't try too hard. How was your weekend?
Good, actually, great. Yours?
It was fine, easy.
You need some help with this?
First you put this down like that.
Exactly.
Like that. Careful.
There you go.
- Alright, how many copies? - Just one.
One copy.
Thanks!
Voilà!
Take the original.
Maybe...
this week if you're not busy we could go get some lunch?
You alright?
Papercut?
Maybe.
Sure. Thanks.
- I have to go. - Alright.
Bye!
- Nick? - Hello?
- Who's this? - Shit. Is this George?
- Who's this? - Hi George, it's Chloe. Is Nick there?
Yeah, hold on.
It's for you, dude.
- Hello. - Hey. Chloe.
Hey. You found me.
So...
what's up?
Me and George are working.
Sorry.
What are you doing later? Should I call you back?
I was thinking about going to Atlantic City.
Really? I love Atlantic City.
My friend spent her birthday there, in this nice hotel...
- Do you want to go? - Yeah.
Yeah, I do, actually. That sounds really fun.
So why don't I give you a call later?
Great, Nick.
- Alright, bye. - Bye, Nick.
Dude, what are you doing?
- What? - You just invited her to Atlantic City!
So what, we'll all go.
I'm not going. It's a guy thing. No girlfriends.
She's not my girlfriend.
- You say it. - No, you.
Hey, guys!
Hi, Chloe!
Where were you all night?
Chloe got laid!
We went to Atlantic City.
You drove?
What were you wearing?
Same thing.
Same clothes...
Walk of shame! Walk of shame!
What else?
I don't know. It's not what we did.
We just had fun. We had a room.
Gambled a little. Won some money.
I know no one's perfect, but...
I even don't mind the bad things he does.
Wait a minute. What bad things?
Nothing, just little things.
Like what?
He definitely has a gambling problem.
But he's got the money, so whatever, right?
And then he...
talks about himself a lot.
But I like that, because I get shy sometimes.
And he always makes the plans but that's because he's a man.
He's not a boy, I'm so sick of little boys.
And he... doesn't call when he says he's gonna call.
That's the worst.
But he tells great stories.
- He's really entertaining. - What else?
Nothing, Matt.
It's so not coming out right. Nothing.
This guy sounds great.
Yeah, he is.
He really is.
I've got to get over him. I have to get over him.
I'm gonna force myself to date other guys.
Yeah, good guys.
Guys I'm not attracted to.
So they'll actually like me.
I had such a good time last night.
What about when that drunk guy tried to tell that ridiculous joke?
You were so funny because you knew the punch line!
But I handled him. I just turned it on him.
He was so drunk, he was floored.
So what are you doing later?
I'm playing basket-ball with George.
And then?
This friend's in town from L.A.
She's only here tonight, so I'm going to hang out with her.
What are you doing?
I don't know. Girl stuff. Hang out.
Cool, cool.
Well, I guess I'll talk to you later, then.
Have fun!
Have fun. I'll talk to you later.
- Bye! - Bye.
Bye! Bye...
So you think I'm fat or something?
You think Nick thinks I'm fat?
You're not fat, you're womanly.
Maybe I could call him.
I tried this morning
but I didn't press "star 88" and I know he has caller ID.
It's like...
You can't even stalk someone anymore.
I hate him, but I think I'm obsessed.
I'm like, obsessed girl, right?
What do you want from this guy?
I just want him to like me. Care for me.
Look, let me give you a little situation.
Here's the scenario.
Let's say...
that Nick wanted you to be his girlfriend
but only giving you what you're getting now.
- Is that what you want? - Yeah.
I mean, you know, I'd take that.
Come on, our court's ready.
Hello, little girl.
- You don't love him. - Yeah, I do.
Like nothing else matters.
See. That's your problem.
Other things should matter. You should matter.
I matter.
Ah, love...
Is that what you feel for Jacki?
No, I have an actual relationship with Jacki.
This guy doesn't...
You're a great girl. You're beautiful.
You should demand more for yourself.
If he gave you what you want, you wouldn't like him anymore.
- Yeah, I would. - No, you wouldn't.
You're obsessed with some prick!
Look. They're happy.
Ish.
I was out to dinner with these German clients.
And I'm sitting there...
it was like this Moroccan type bar...
What is taking so long?
Germany, Germany, Germany.
Clients, clients, clients.
God, Nick! China!
Nick?
My God! It's Chloe. I can't believe you're out of town.
Hi. I'm in the bath and I'm thinking
about you.
Fuck you, actually.
Fuck you for...
Weren't we supposed to do something this weekend? Together?
How...
How can you...
How can you do this to me?
I don't understand. I don't understand.
What are you doing?
I'm supposed to guess you're out of town?
What am I, a psychic?
Maybe you're in China?
Maybe you're watching the...
You're such a traveller!
Fuck off, Nick! Fuck you.
How can you do this to me?
How can you do this to me? What have I done?
It's not fair.
You know what? Fuck you!
You know what a catch I am?
I am... such a catch.
It's not because I pretend to be a sweet...
Fuck you! Call me when you get home!
Call me when you get this message, buddy.
I don't... You call me.
Please call me when you get this.
OK? Call me! Call me, you fucker.
How dare you?
Who the fuck do you think you are?
This is crazy!
It takes the cake. I'm too old for this!
Come on. You just call me.
Oh my God!
I don't deserve this.
I so don't deserve this.
Look, I'm not trying to pressure you into anything.
Where are you? Are you there for work?
I just... Let me know! Let me know where you are and...
we can just talk.
But... you've no idea how mad I am right now.
I'm so mad at you.
But I miss you. But I'm mad!
I'm so crazy.
Alright. OK. Call me, you fucker.
Just call me, OK?
Please call me.
Alright.
You dick.
You're a fucking dick.
You're really a dick.
- Does she not come in? - Hold on, I'm really sorry.
I'll be... Use the phone if you like.
It took me a month to...
Help me.
Those are very important people. What?
- I left a message on this guy's... - What guy?
It's not the point. I need you to retrieve it.
Alright, slow down.
I used to hack.
I was a hacker.
Just calm down. Don't go crazy.
- Do it now! - I've got people...
- Andrew! - Listen to me.
I'll take care of it. Now calm down, I have people in the office.
Do it now.
- Please do it now! - Let go of my phone.
Go back to your office. Calm down.
He's going to check his machine! Do it now, please!
It's very important, for the company, for our jobs.
Go back to your office. Relax.
I'll be back. I'll take care of you.
Take deep breaths. I have to finish this meeting.
- You don't hate me? - No, I don't hate you.
She's just a little bit too insane for me.
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