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Police Academy 3 Back in Training 1986

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We close in 20 minutes.
-Where the hell are these clowns?|-It is a large garage, sir.
-We're over here!|-Are you an idiot?
There they are.
Get down.
It's about time.
I've sucked up enough fumes|to last me a lifetime.
Stand up!
What's with all this deep-throat crap?
Don't look at me. It wasn't my idea|to meet here. It was his.
We shouldn't be seen together.
Just thinking of the safety factor|of Operation Fiasco.
That's what I call this, sir.
I work with the village idiot.
-Do you guys have any idea--|-Sir, your glasses!
Do you guys.... Take off your glasses.
Do you guys have any idea how many|police academies are in this state?
-Is this a trick question, sir?|-No, this is not a trick question, sir.
My sources have informed me that|one of them is about to be terminated.
-Which one?|-I don't know.
They haven't decided yet.
And that's where you two come in.
I need two good men that'll make sure|Lassard's academy fails and not mine.
I need two good men|that'll inform on Lassard's academy...
and tell me every move they make.
I need two good men|that'll sell out their mothers to get ahead.
-That's us.|-Good.
Can we go now?
We should split up.
Safety factor. We'll go first.
Looks like it's closed, sir.
They locked us in.
The car!
No problem, sir!
I got it! Please!
-My car!|-Please, stop!
My car.
{y:i}As governor of this great state of ours...
{y:i}it fills me with pride|{y:i}to see these graduating police cadets.
{y:i}I'm also sad to tell you...
{y:i}that this is the last time|{y:i}we will be graduating two classes.
{y:i}It's time to tighten our belts.|{y:i}It's time to close one of the academies.
{y:i}But in the spirit of fair play, which is|{y:i}the hallmark of my administration...
{y:i}I have appointed a committee...
{y:i}to evaluate and compare|{y:i}the two academies.
{y:i}That way, their fate will rest|{y:i}in their own hands.
{y:i}I am certain that both commandants|{y:i}will welcome such a challenge.
Got it!
{y:i}Isn't that true, Comdt. Mauser|{y:i}and Comdt. Lassard?
Well, Comdt. Lassard, good luck, sir.
-May the better academy win.|-We intend to, sir.
Don't be too sure, Comdt. Mauser.
We have many wonderful new recruits|which we shall mold in my own image.
Promise me you'll do that, sir, please.
Sir, the committee.
Ladies, gentlemen, truly a pleasure.
Anyone need a ride, police escort?|Don't hesitate to ask.
Governor, magnificent speech!
Bravo! I applaud you.
Why beat around the bush, Mauser?
Just get down on your knees|and kiss his ass.
I don't need any tactical advice|from you, Callahan.
I know you're a busy man, sir,|but I've been doing a study...
on some training techniques|I thought might interest you.
The Governor is in a hurry,|Comdt. Mauser.
I could memo you on these, sir.
Governor, I speak for everyone|when I say--
Let me assure you, Governor...
Comdt. Mauser|does not speak for this academy.
Governor, what I meant to say was--
Get a hold of yourself, you idiot.|You're making the Governor sick!
You certainly made|a lasting impression on the Governor.
The only impression that counts, sir,|is in this file!
We'll see who's got an academy|when this is over.
-You have nothing to worry about, sir.|-Right. Just leave everything to us.
We'll make Mauser eat those words.|Let's go.
Okay, come on now. Guys!
Girls, of course, I'm sorry.|All right, keep it up! Number one!
Take it on, drive it in here! Keep it alive.|Take it in, drive in!
Keep your arms up! Take it! Take it on....
Try! Bring it back. Stop. Stop the playing!
Give me the ball. Gather around, girls.|I want to talk about something.
I want you to remember from yesterday....
Come a little closer. All right.
Remember from yesterday,|you pick and roll? Now, ready and break!
Number two. Keep it alive.
{y:i}Police Academy to Sgt. Mahoney.|{y:i}Come in, please.
Sgt. Mahoney's office.
{y:i}Get me Mahoney,|{y:i}and get your feet off the dashboard!
Good, take it along now.
-I'm sorry, Sergeant. I didn't mean to.|-That's okay. My pleasure.
Sgt. Mahoney, I just heard,|Comdt. Lassard needs help.
Lassard's in trouble?
Give it back!
Wait. Wait for me!
Go, Mom!
{y:i}Sgt. Hightower, come in.
{y:i}Hightower, get rid of the pantyhose|{y:i}and report to the academy immediately.
I'm on my way.
Come on out, Eugene. I give up.
You outdid yourself this time.
Olly, olly, oxen free?
All right, come on, Tackleberry,|I'm tired of this.
Quit fooling around in the backyard.
I'm serious. I got something to tell you.
All right, come on, Eugene.|I'm getting pretty tired of this.
Come on, Eugene,|I got an important message--
Good one, Tack. Really fooled me.
Mahoney called.|He said Lassard needs help.
What a wonderful moment,|my favorite graduates back.
The academy is facing|its greatest challenge.
After many years...
of graduating many fine police officers,|the State says...
it can no longer afford|two police academies.
God knows what they did|with all the money.
We have a tradition to uphold...
a reputation to defend,|and defend it, we will!
-Thank you, Mahoney.|-Anytime, sir.
With our new recruits and your help,|I'm sure we can survive the competition.
There can only be one winner.
But also only one loser,|which works out nicely.
I certainly hope we win.
Then I can retire|with the same sense of dignity...
I have always brought to the academy.
Get out of my way, buster,|or I'll start playing rough.
-Don't do that.|-No, I will not!
You have the stupidest idea.|Put down that suitcase.
-You are not going to that police academy.|-Wrong!
Finally, don't you think one policeman|in this family is enough?
Stop it! I don't care what you say!
Okay, listen. See, I just wanted|to join the force to be with you.
I mean, we can ride together, we can wear|matching uniforms, share ammo...
everything that makes a marriage work.
Honey, look. Listen to me, sweetheart.
-Police work, it's just so dangerous.|-I don't care!
Oh, no. No, you don't!
You let go of me, mister,|or face the consequences!
-Good morning, Facklers.|-Hello, Mrs. Pectelli.
It is hell out there on those streets.
-All right. Okay.|-Come on.
Sweetie, what? Come on.
We're adults.|I know we can talk this thing out.
Exactly. I know you're smart enough|to do that work. It's just that...
I'm the breadwinner in this family, and|you're my lady, and your place is at home.
Right? Come on, give me a kiss.
What do you.... Come on.
You think I can't break this down?|Open it up, sweetie.
I'm a policeman. I'm trained|for this kind of stuff, you know that?
All right, big joke. Open that door!|Come on. You said we'd be adults.
That's my....
-Do you want to kill me?|-I have thought about it a couple of times.
Honey, stop it right now! I'm serious!
I don't care.|I wanna go to the police academy.
Listen to reason, will you? Listen to me|right now. You are not gonna....
-What are you doing?|-I want you off this car now!
I just waxed this car.|You'll get me into so much trouble.
This is a city street,|not a drag strip, thank you.
If you don't like it, you go around me!
{y:i}...with volume on the New York|{y:i}Stock Exchange as of this hour...
{y:i}at 56 million shares in moderate trading,|{y:i}with the Dow Jones up 4 points at 1,507.
{y:i}The dollar is showing renewed strength|{y:i}against foreign currency...
{y:i}gaining 10% against the pound...
{y:i}on rumors of the Fed's|{y:i}dropping interest rates.
{y:i}The uncertainty of interest rates|{y:i}is affecting the bond market.
{y:i}Trading has been cautious|{y:i}and will remain....
This is not Le Mans!
Porter. Redcap.
That's right.|Could you help me with these, please?
That's right. Come on over here.
Thank you. That'll be fine, thank you.
Please, sit down. Please.
Zip your lips, slap your butts to the seat|and listen hard!
That's a lot better.
{y:i}Let me be the first to welcome you|{y:i}to the fabulous Midcity Police Academy.
{y:i}We're about to begin|{y:i}an incredible 14-week adventure in living.
{y:i}I'm one of your hosts,|{y:i}Sgt. Carey Mahoney.
{y:i}And as you exit the bus,|{y:i}please form a double line.
And march them!
Who did that?
Say, man, this place is crazy. Suckers|always making me dance and stuff.
What kind of place is this?|I don't look like I'm gonna make it.
You'll make it just fine. Keep dancing.
Good, tall. Good.
Good, strong.
Excuse me.
And who might you be?
Tomoko Nogata, of Tachikawa Nogatas.
"And is this your lovely wife?"
-Proctor.|-Yes, sir.
-What's the story here with Fu Manchu?|-Fu Manchu.
I don't have a Fu Manchu.
I'm talking about the stir-fried shrimp|from out of town!
He's with the Tachikawa Highway Patrol...
part of an international exchange program,|here to study our methods.
I'm not teaching my cadets|how to use a wok!
You ship him off to Lassard's.|He'll fit in perfectly over there.
He could use a good sushi chef.
-No offense?|-Thank you.
Kiss my what?
Excuse me, sir.
-Ma'am! I'm a ma'am!|-I'm sorry.
Those guns make it difficult to tell.
-Are you an instructor?|-Affirmative.
Are you a new recruit?
-Yes, I--|-She certainly is. But she's terribly shy.
Stand up straight, Sarah.|And don't babble.
What will the instructor think?
-Now, just pay attention--|-Stifle it!
Don't worry, Sarah.|When we're finished with you...
you'll have nerves of steel,|ice in your veins...
and a set of brass balls this big.
No favoritism here, Eugene.
Bud, here, he fouls up,|you give him a good whack.
-Gotcha!|-That was a good one. Pretty sneaky.
Caught me off guard.
You take care of yourself, son.|And pay attention to Eugene.
I'm proud of you.|You're gonna make one hell of a cop.
Thanks, Dad.|Would you give this to Mom for me?
Don't forget to buckle up.
That was a good one.
Boy, my dad and I have|a terrific relationship.
Does anybody know how to shut|this thing off? It's driving me nuts!
Okay, that's $700.
-Plus tip.|-Here you go.
Wait a minute. What is this?
What do you think you're giving me here?|What, are you kidding?
I don't take any money|with pictures of tuna fish on it.
Come on, American money.|Let's go. $700, that's what you owe me.
Wait a minute. Excuse me.|What's going on here?
-Not enough. He owes me $700, plus tip.|-$700 for a cab ride?
-Where did you catch this cab, Yokohama?|-Yokohama.
Excuse me. I'm Officer Carey Mahoney.|May I be of some assistance?
-Yes. This guy is trying to rip off this guy.|-"Rip off."
-Read the meter. The meter don't lie.|-Is this true? And who's your barber?
Look, wise guy,|don't think a blue uniform scares me.
-No, sir, this is not a scary uniform.|-No, it's not a scary uniform.
-Hightower!|-That's a scary uniform.
This man just said something|about your mother.
He also charged this guy $700|for a cab ride.
-A rip-off.|-Meters don't lie. Read the meter.
They don't lie. They never lie.
Meters don't lie.
This meter lied. It's a lying meter.
-Fair price.|-And tip.
-What's your name, son?|-Nogata.
-Nogata? New recruit?|-Yes.
-Right over there.|-Thank you. Okay.
-Thanks, Hightower.|-Okay, babe.
Excuse me.
That sordid little scene|must have been trying on you, Miss....
Karen Adams.
You're Karen Adams?|You're kidding. We're roomies!
I'll help you settle in.|You'll take your clothes off...
-we'll shower, get close--|-I'm sorry.
I'm not here to get hit on by every guy|who looks cute in a blue uniform.
I want to be a policewoman.
You will be!
We'll get together. We'll talk! I hope.
Well, Mahoney,|I see you still have very good taste.
Thank you.
Nice bike!
Where do you put the batteries?
Get out of my way!
That didn't hurt!
Hi, was I going too fast?
Where do I go to register?
-Let's go. Kirkland, 46!|-Yeah, all right.
-Fackler, where do you think you're going?|-With him.
-Women downstairs!|-Damn!
Move it! Let's go. Come on now, girls!
-Move it.|-All right, Sweetchuck, let's go.
-What's your problem?|-He's the problem. He's an animal.
Get used to it. He's your roommate.
-Roommate?|-Zed's reformed. He's on our side now.
Yeah. I used to be a real jerk,|but now I'm a people guy.
You're awake!
What kind of music do you like?|You like salsa? You like reggae?
Something with that love beat?
This is a song I wrote, off my first album.|And it goes something like this.
It was originally a love ballad,|but I kind of spruced it up.
No, I don't take requests.
All right, clowns...
I want you to police this entire area|from here to the parade ground.
I want you to pick up every cigarette butt,|every scrap of paper, every weed.
Now, we're gonna be watching|from my window.
So if I see these flashlights stop moving,|you're both in big trouble.
Big trouble. Now, get to work.
Let's go, Chad.
-Mr. Zed.|-No school.
-Are you sure this is gonna work?|-Of course it's gonna work.
It's working.
Hup, two, three, four.
As you can see, sir,|I have instant access over all my cadets...
and all of the instructors.
Attention! Give me 20 pushups, now!
There's no escaping the camera's eye, sir.
As you could see,|I can monitor the gym, the classrooms...
{y:i}The Rocky & Bullwinkle Show?
Good! This is the episode where Natasha|and Boris have Rocky--
It's an old one, though. I've seen it. Rerun.
We have a few bugs|to be worked out, sir...
but I'm sure|you'll tell the evaluation committee...
about the wonderful work we're doing in--
You're chapping your lips|on the wrong butt, Mr. Mauser.
I have no say|with the evaluation committee.
Besides, I want both academies|to look good.
So do I, sir.
And when may the committee|be coming by, sir?
The committee is spending the rest|of the week at Lassard's academy.
Next week, the Governor has them|snooping around the downtown precincts.
So that gives you...
a couple of weeks|to perfect your ass-kissing.
That's plenty of time, sir.
Callahan, there you are.
We have to talk to you|about this evaluation thing.
I'll see you at my....
And four! And one, and two, and three!
Not only must you know all traffic laws...
you must also master high-speed driving.
Now, we'll begin today|with a leisurely spin around the course.
Watch where you're going, lady!
Okay, you can start the car now.
But if I hear any of those things,|you've failed.
Wrong key. I'll be right back.
That's no problem.
Very often in the field...
the dog can be your best friend.
Your most faithful partner.
I love dogs, and they love me.|Hi, boy.
First.... Out.
It is important to develop|the master-dog relationship.
If you show any fear...
the dog will not respect you.
-Order the dogs to sit.|-They won't listen to me.
They will. Come on, try.
Go on, have a seat.
You've got to show them who's boss.
At this time...
I would like to introduce to all of you...
my instructor,|the man who taught me how to fight.
Please welcome, if you will...
Sgt. John Hurney.
Now, can I have a volunteer?
Can I have a volunteer?|Very good, Nogata.
I don't believe it.
Oh, boy!
He's great!
You have impressive moves for a cadet.
Thank you.
You see, it's a matter of the mind|being mightier than the bosom.
Interesting theory.
I said bosom, not sword.
Sounds like a common mistake.
No. I mean no disrespect.|It's just that she's so....
What a woman!
Hit the showers!
See what I mean?
Let's go!
Miss Macho.
All right, men, it's 22:00.
Time to hit the sack.
Let's go.
{y:i}You're dead meat, copper!
Let's move it!
-What time is it?|-3:00 in the morning.
All right, everybody!|Everybody up! Let's go!
Let's go!
{y:i}Come on, you sludge buckets.|{y:i}If I can keep up this pace, so can you.
{y:i}Let's go, maggots.
{y:i}A good cop is always prepared.|{y:i}A good cop knows the city streets.
-Are you gonna be all right, Hedges?|-He'll be okay.
-Can I help you with anything?|-No, we're here now.
-Bye, Hedges.|-I'll have to be fed intravenously.
Just lie down.
What is this?
It's my bed. I pick up in New Delhi.
Posture-o-pedic. Very good for back.
Who is that?
Do you want to, like,|borrow my shampoo?
Freeze! Identify yourself.
It's me, Mr. Sweetchuck.
You look like a man|who's going AWOL to me, mister.
Yeah, I am. I'm tired of having a roommate|that's an animal!
I was happier when I was at home|getting mugged!
You look me in the eye|and tell me you're quitting!
Don't worry. I'll take care of you.
You give me a chance...
and I'll make you into a man.
Even if it kills you.
Feel good? Let's go.
A good kick may be all that stands...
between you and the excruciating pain...
of a.357 magnum slug|shredding your vital organs.
Fackler! You're up.
-Sweetchuck!|-Sweetchuck, what's the word?
-Kill.|-Let me hear it again.
-Kill.|-Now go for it!
Whose bright idea was it to meet here?
It was my bright idea.
This is some beautiful view, isn't it, sir?
The twinkling lights of the city,|stars in the heavens...
the moon in the sky.
And Mr. Sandman flying|from rooftop to rooftop.
What the hell is that?
Give me this damn thing.|Well, how'd it go?
The committee knew right away|we were hopeless.
Now, I want you guys|to take the cadets downtown...
for some fieldwork.
We can't do that. Cadets don't go|into the field till after their tenth week.
-They're not ready for anything like that.|-I know that, you moron.
That's the whole idea. Next week, the|evaluation committee is gonna be there.
-I get it, sir.|-I doubt it.
Sorry, sir.
I'm gonna be there|when Lassard's guys screw up.
You guys make sure they screw up. Get it?
-Yes, sir.|-Good.
Punch him!
One, two, three, four.
That's great. He's looking tired. Good.
Your legs are rubbery.
-Knock him out. Let me hear you say it.|-Knock him out.
What are you doing?
That's not the way I taught you to hit.|You gotta hit like this. Like this!
Now, hit him!
The eyewitness is still|the main source of convictions.
Mr. Miller, I want you to take your time.|Study these men very carefully.
Then tell us if you see the man|who robbed your store.
Let me reassure you, Mr. Miller...
the suspects cannot see you|when it's dark in here.
Well, Mr. Miller? Is he there?
Are you sure they can't see me? My wife|said they'd see me, and not to do this.
Mr. Miller, bright lights in there...
dark in here. He can't see us.|Do you see him?
Bringing cadets into the field this early...
has all the makings|of one of your lousy ideas.
What's the matter, Mahoney?|No faith in the cadets?
How hard can it be, Miller?|Is he there or isn't he?
I don't know.|He really didn't steal that much.
The hospital stay was quite restful.
I wish I'd listened to my wife.
For God's sake, Miller, will you|take your balls out of your wife's purse...
and finger the dirtbag?
It's him!
-I'll kill you!|-No, it's him.
He's the one, the priest.
Sir, honestly, we had no idea|the evaluation committee would be here.
We thought|it would help advance the training.
-What do you mean, we?|-It was a lousy idea.
Now I've got a bunch trainees hanging|around with this damn committee!
I've been, like, noticing you,|and you're a nice enough lady...
but you're too tense.
You got to relax. You got to calm down.
You take the big guy,|I'll take the little guy.
We got a cop.
No sweat. This is my old gang.
Would you like to go out to grab a burger|and then go to the movies or something?
I'd like to introduce you guys|to the future Mrs. Zed!
Hey, son.
-Excuse me, Officer.|-Yes, ma'am?
We are sitting in the nonsmoking section...
and that man refuses to put out his cigar.
I'll take care of this, ma'am.
Excuse me, sir.
You're sitting in a nonsmoking area.|Would you please extinguish that cigar?
Drop dead. I'll put it out when I'm finished.
You'll put it out now, mister!
Hit it!
Now, go get him!
-Hurry up!|-I'm trying. I'm going as fast--
Will this count against us, sir?
I've been here at the academy|many wonderful years...
and I'm very fond of it.
-The new cadets are doing well?|-Yes, sir.
-We are going to succeed now, aren't we?|-Yes, sir.
One more ping out of you, Jonesey,|I'll tape your lips permanently together.
Listen, everybody.
I want you to forget today. You don't have|to be ready for the field yet.
-We sure proved that.|-It wasn't a total loss.
Of course it wasn't.
One police car and two civilian cars|completely totaled...
three citizens' complaints...
two members of the evaluation committee|under heavy sedation.
I wouldn't call it a total loss,|would you? No.
Bartender, how about some champagne|for me and my associate?
We're celebrating. Come on, Proctor.
-Let's just get out of here.|-No.
Boy, that's a waste of champagne, sir.
Now, what is that crack|supposed to mean, Mahoney?
It means we don't think you can tell the|difference between beer and champagne.
You know something?|You two are brain dead.
Bet you can't. Loser pays.
-You're on, Mahoney.|-Can I have a beer in the same glass?
-Mind if we blindfold you, sir?|-Why?
-We wouldn't want you to peek.|-Right.
-See anything?|-No.
-Sure?|-No, I can't see.
Okay. Round and round|and guess the drink.
You win! He always wins!
All right, we'll pay up.|Let's get out of here.
-You two jerks.|-You really showed them, sir.
-Proctor.|-Yes, sir?
Give me a hand with this. Take it off.
No, don't go slow.|Go fast, so it doesn't hurt.
That hurt. Am I okay?
It's nice. There's a mirror right here, sir.
I got no eyebrows.
-Where are my eyebrows?|-Right here, sir.
-This is going very well.|-Yeah?
Yeah. That's great. It's coming.
That's great. That's nice.|You're gonna like that, sir.
Let me see it.
Look at that. Look at this,|this angle over here, every angle.
-I can't see it!|-It's yours.
What do you think, sir?
I think I like it.
Commissioner Hurst was very upset.
He used many bad words|to describe our academy.
Some were even foreign.
Italian or Irish, I think.
This is survival of the fittest...
and after what happened downtown...
it seems we're not very fit.
-Sir, you're not giving up, are you?|-Of course not.
I have no doubt we shall be victorious.
I have a little doubt,|but, basically, I'm an optimist.
Now, I know the committee|will be observing us here...
and in the field,|and at the Policepersons Ball...
so we must do nothing|to dishonor the uniform.
-What was I saying?|-Dismissed!
This map will pinpoint trouble spots...
over a 10-square-mile area.
This dispatch unit has a 200-mile range...
and a computerized city grid.
This computerized city grid|tracks police vehicle movement.
-Is that clear, everyone?|-Yes, ma'am!
Yeah, why not?
In tear gas training, the manual says|you should have your mask on.
Be out of here 30 seconds after|the canister comes through the window.
Any questions?
Good luck.
-Nice throw, Hightower.|-It went in, didn't it?
All right, everybody out!
Everybody present and accounted for?
I feel good. I'll be in there if you need me.
Look, I know you people|have had a tough week...
but there's something you should know.
You may be the last class|to attend this academy.
I don't know if this means anything to you,|but it sure does to us.
That's why, we not only|want you to keep up the good work...
we want you to work harder.
Because we think that you people...
can be the best class|this academy has ever seen.
You can do it. Believe me.
Once, even I was a screw-up.
Let's go out there and win one|for Comdt. Lassard, okay?
Okay? Yeah, come on.
Did you hear that?
No? Of course not. How silly of me to ask.
You're too far from the window.
-Look sharp, Mahoney.|-Right.
-Sgt. Mahoney.|-Yeah.
I was really impressed by what you said.
You really care.
Yeah. Just don't spread it around.|It might ruin my rep.
I owe you an apology for the way I acted.|You were just trying to be cute.
Trying? On a cuteness scale of one to ten,|I'm an eight.
-Five.|-You're right, I am a five.
Listen, I'll accept your apology|if you accept mine.
-Deal.|-All right. You know something?
Have you ever felt,|after meeting someone for ten minutes...
-you've known them for two, three years?|-No.
-Thanks, Mahoney.|-Welcome, sir.
Excuse, please. Shall I come back|when all is well with your mind?
My mind is as well as it gets,|but you look a little tense.
You see, I have great confusions...
about Sgt. Callahan.
You've come to the right place, brother.
Grab yourself pad and pencil because...
the love doctor is about to speak.
In my country, it is written...
only kiss of beautiful woman...
can compare to petal of a rose...
In America, talk is cheap.
I love America.
Hi, there. Remember me?
Yes, of course. How could I forget?
Who was that?
Just an old friend.
Why are we celebrating?|It's Mauser, 42. Lassard, zip.
You think we're doing that well?
How's tricks? Not to worry.
Your friend forgot to wear|her "for rent" sign.
She's such a sweet kid.|My aerobics instructor.
Mahoney, see this ear?|It's a finely tuned crap detector.
And a lovely ear it is. If I blow in it,|will you follow me anywhere?
I'm surprised|you had the nerve to show up...
after your cadets humiliated|the Police Department.
Personally, it makes me sick.
How about you guys?|Don't you guys think....
Coming, Commissioner.
Will you think less of me|if I call him a slime bucket?
In fact, I'll have my aerobics instructor|confirm it. I'll be right back.
-So, how you doing?|-Terrific. I need one of your special favors.
Right here?
I just love a man|that eats shrimp that way.
-You do?|-Oh, yes.
Come on.
-How does he do that?|-The question is, why does he do that?
It is a power of the mind.
Allow me.
What kind of idiot klutz are you?
Come on, dumpling.
I witnessed the entire attack, sir.|My apologies, Mrs. Hurst.
May I say Copeland is not one of my|cadets. He is a member of Lassard's staff.
You look different, Mauser.|Are you putting on weight?
Come on, dumpling.|We'll get you cleaned up.
That's Lassard's staff, sir.|Send me the cleaning bill on that, sir.
You want the last shrimp?
-There's only one thing that I want.|-What? I'll call room service.
Don't be silly.
What I want is for you to wait in there,|in the bathroom...
while I get ready.
-Why can't I wait in here?|-We just met.
Come on, can't a girl be|a little bit old-fashioned?
I'll call you just as soon as I'm ready.
Come on, it's kind of drafty.
I'll get some help.
A little patience. I'll be out in a minute.
Hurry up. Somebody wants to use the....
Come on, let me in! Hurry up!
You should be ashamed of yourself.
I'll make up your room in a minute.
Where you going with my cart?
-My cart.|-Let me borrow it.
I'm a police officer--
It's mine.
Warm tonight.
How's it going?
...hands him the ticket,|and the driver said--
That's real funny, sir.|Great joke teller, the Commissioner.
Are you enjoying yourselves?|Are you comfortable?
Waiter, round of drinks. On me.
Drinks are free, you idiot.
Yes, sir. How stupid of me.
If you don't mind|my saying so, Mrs. Hurst...
that fruit punch stain dried real nicely.
You are not going to influence|this evaluation committee.
So will you please stop all this slobbering?
I think I can get it under control|if I could only find out who's winning.
Let's just say that Lassard's cadets|have not exactly impressed them.
Thank you very much, sir.
Get hold of yourself, man.
Good Lord! You're falling apart.
-Excuse me. Commissioner?|-What the hell do you want?
We've had reports of a naked man|terrorizing the hotel.
He's obviously not at this table.
-Mauser!|-Yes, sir.
Would you take care of this naked person?
Naked person, yes, sir!|I'll get right on top of him!
Glad to see you enjoying yourselves, men,|despite the bad news.
Bad news? There's been bad news?
Well, bad news for you, good news for me.
Your cadets have been doing|their usual fine job...
so it looks like I've got this one in the bag.
Congratulations! I'm so happy|when someone I know wins.
I always think these contests are fixed.
Wait a minute.
-If you're winning, then....|-You're losing.
Sorry to spoil your fun.
-It's not fair.|-Any ideas?
I could twist off Mauser's shiny head|and roll it down the street.
Hold that thought, Hightower.
Come on. Damn it!
Governor, Commissioner--
Ladies and gentlemen...
may I introduce you to a very special man,|Comdt. Mauser.
As you know, the committee's|been evaluating both of our academies...
and they're very close to a decision.
And you know what this man|said about that?
It's a fact....
It's a "facahamahoma."
Does this man have a way with words?
He said you can't judge an academy|by rushing its cadets out into the field...
or by seeing whose cadets|marched the straightest, no.
Do you know what the man,|I like to call "Mr. Policeman," said?
"Forget any mistakes cadets|have made over the last few weeks.
"They were just learning.
"It's these last days of competition|that should determine the winner."
Comdt. Mauser, I salute you.
We all salute you!
{y:i}This is the final day|{y:i}of the evaluation competition...
{y:i}and though Comdt. Mauser's academy|{y:i}is in the lead...
{y:i}it's how you perform today|{y:i}that will determine our winner.
{y:i}Police personnel|{y:i}will monitor your performance...
{y:i}at crime locations.
{y:i}My advice is to treat this|{y:i}exactly as if it were real.
I'm going to accompany the Governor|to the charity regatta.
He wants one cadet|from each academy to go with us.
But the competition, sir.
The Governor thought it would be nice|to evaluate cadets in a social situation.
Proctor, what is this?|Hurst said one from each academy.
They're just as good as one man, almost.
The phone's got my quarter|and the operator won't give it back to me.
I'll handle this, ma'am.
-Operator, this is Sgt. Tackleberry.|{y:i}-So?
-Please relinquish this lady's quarter.|{y:i}-I told her we'll send her a refund.
-You'll pay her now!|{y:i}-I'm sorry, sir, would you like to speak to--
Stand back, ma'am.
Can you identify your quarter, ma'am?
Sgt. Hooks, we got a 10-48 in Sector 1.
Send in Tackleberry.
Tackleberry? He's across town.|Hightower's only three blocks away.
Send in Tackleberry.
You heard him. Do it.
-Sweetchuck!|-What a lobby.
Secure the elevator. I'll take the stairs.
Sgt. Hooks, there's a 10-48!
All right. Send in car 46.
{y:i}Car 46.
{y:i}Hightower, there's a roving gang|{y:i}in the Gower district.
Oh, boy, this is it.
Right, right.
Take a left....|No, you're going towards the expressway!
Take a U-turn on....
{y:i}Make a U-turn on Flint Street....
No, you're going towards the expressway!|What is that?
No, wait, make a U-turn!
-Where are we going?|-Just relax.
Not a word.
...then you go around. Stop! Don't....
We're with the Governor at the trophy.
The purpose of the regatta, of course...
is we're hoping to raise about $20,000|for my campaign.
I was going to--
-Good luck, Governor.|-We're moving toward the punch bowl.
Hello, Judge. Pick a winner.
We've stopped.
-Would you back off?|-We're backing off.
What are you trying to do, injure him?
Comdt. Mauser's cadets|never abandon their posts, sir!
Unlike some cadets I might mention, sir!
Holy cow!
{y:i}Mahoney, somebody, I need help.
Listen, the busboys...
are shooting my nose.
{y:i}Did you read that? Was that for real?
We heard it. Sir?
-Maybe we better check it out.|-What about the evaluation?
One of my boys may be in trouble.|Screw the evaluation.
I love it when you talk dirty, sir.
Mahoney must think|he's as dumb as we are.
-We're not gonna fall for that stuff.|-Yeah.
He must be getting desperate,|trying to sucker us with that crap.
Come on, let's go.
Get your hands in the air. It's a stickup!
If there was trouble,|Baxter would let us know.
Take them, boys.
Don't you touch that.
No, not the one for bravery.
There's the Yacht Club.
How are we gonna get there, Sergeant?
How do you look in a wet suit?
Hand over your money and jewels|and nobody gets hurt!
You'll never get away with this.|I'm the Governor.
The Governor? Did you hear that, boys?|We got the Governor.
You must be breaking your mother's heart.
Why don't you ask her?|She's right over there.
She looks like you.
Gather our boys. We got trouble coming!
Spread out.
I can't get Baxter.
Something's going on at the marina.|Right over there. Take the next right.
Just relax.|You've got the right to remain silent.
-You passed it.|-They're not yielding.
-Pull over to the right.|-Yield!
You're missing it. There goes the right.
We're in a police car|and they're not yielding.
Stop. Hold it. Mahoney!
Police officer. Stop right there!
Karen, I'm going after the Governor.
-Are you okay?|-Yes.
-You do look good in a wet suit.|-So do you.
Drop it!
Go ahead. Make my day...
Freeze, cop!
I didn't mean to hit you.
I hate you.
Pull over.
Mahoney, you all right?
I'm okay. Just keep going.
Get out of my way, old man.
Mahoney's in trouble. Let's go!
You got it.
Proctor, you're an idiot.
You were born an idiot,|you'll always be an idiot.
Move it, Proctor.
I got this side,|you paddle on the other side.
Hold it!
You okay, sir?
Look out.
Let's talk.
-You okay?|-You need help?
-Where's the Governor?|-Governor!
Don't move, dirtbag!
All right! Can we go again?
I'd like to thank all the members|of my racing team for their assistance.
I couldn't have won....
{y:i}...without the help of my|{y:i}many wonderful instructors...
{y:i}and my many fine cadets.
{y:i}Thanks to all...
{y:i}this academy|{y:i}will carry on its fine tradition.
P S 2004
Pact of Silence The
Padre padrone (Paolo Taviani & Vittorio Taviani 1977 CD1
Padre padrone (Paolo Taviani & Vittorio Taviani 1977 CD2
Paid In Full
Paint Your Wagon 1969 CD1
Paint Your Wagon 1969 CD2
Palabras Encadenadas
Pale Rider CD1
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Pan Tadeusz
Pan Wolodyjowski CD1
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Panda Kopanda (Panda! Go Panda!)
Pandoras Box 1929 CD1
Pandoras Box 1929 CD2
Panic Room 2002
Paper The 1994
Paradine Case The (1947)
Paradise Found
Paradise Hawaiian Style - Elvis Presley (Michael D Moore 1966)
Paradise Villa 2000
Paragraph 175 (Rob Epstein Jeffrey Friedman 1999)
Paraiso B
Parallax View The 1974
Paran Deamun (1998)
Parapluies de Cherbourg Les
Paraso B
Parent Trap The CD1
Parent Trap The CD2
Paris - When It Sizzles (1964)
Paris Texas CD1
Paris Texas CD2
Parole officer The
Party7 2000
Pasolini Volume 2
Passage to India CD1
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Passion 1982 30fps
Passion Of The Christ The
Patch of Blue
Pather Panchali (Satyajit Ray 1955)
Pathfinder 1987
Patlabor - The Movie - 1990
Patlabor The Movie 3 CD1
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Patton CD1of3 1970
Patton CD2of3 1970
Patton CD3of3 1970
Paul McCartney Back In The US CD1
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Pauline At The Beach
Pauline and Paulette
Pauly Shore is Dead
Payback 1999
Peace Hotel The (1995)
Pearl Harbor
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Pee-wees Big Adventure (1985)
Peep Show 1x1
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Peeping Tom (1960)
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Pelican Brief The
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Pepe le Moko
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Perfect Blue
Perfect Murder A
Perfect Score The 2004
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Pet Sematary
Petek13th part 7 A new blood
Peter Pan
Peter Pan (2003)
Peters Friends
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Petrified Forest The 1936
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Phantom The
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Philadelphia Story The 1940
Phone - Byeong-ki Ahn 2002
Phone Booth
Phouska I (The Bubble 2001)
Pianist The
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Piano The
Pickup On South Street 1953
Piece of the Action A 1977 CD1
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Pieces Of April
Pietje Bell
Pink Panther The - A Shot In The Dark (1964)
Pitfall The (Otoshiana 1962)
Planet Of The Apes (1969)
Planet of the Apes 1968
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Planets The 1 - Different Worlds
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Planta 4
Plastic Tree CD1
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Platee CD1
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Platonic Sex CD1
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Platoon (Special Edition)
Play It Again Sam
Playing By Heart
Playtime CD1
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Please Teach Me English (2003) CD1
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Plumas de Caballo
Plunkett and Macleane
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Pod Njenim Oknom (Beneath Her Window)
Poika ja ilves
Point Break - CD1 1991
Point Break - CD2 1991
Pokemon - Movie 1 - Mewtwo Strikes Back
Poker (2001) CD1
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Pokrovsky Gates The 25fps 1982
Pola X 1999 CD1
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Police Academy (1984)
Police Academy 2 Their First Assignment 1985
Police Academy 3 Back in Training 1986
Police Academy 4 - Citizens on Patrol 1987
Police Story (2004) CD1
Police Story (2004) CD2
Police Story 2
Poltergeist 2 The Other Side 1986
Poltergeist 3 (1988)
Poolhall Junkies
Pork Chop Hill
Porky - Awful Orphan (1949)
Porky - Dough for the Do Do (1949)
Porky - Porky Chops (1949)
Porky - The Wearing of the Grin (1951)
Pornographer The
Pornography 2003
Pornostar (Poruno Suta)
Port of Call (1948)
Portrait of a Lady The
Poseidon Adventure The
Poslusne hlasim (1957)
Possession (2002)
Possible Loves - Eng - 2000
Post Coitum 2004
Postman Blues (1997)
Posutoman Burusu
Power Play (2002)
Practical Magic
Predator (1987)
Prem Rog
Presidents Analyst The (1967)
Presidio The
Prevrashcheniye (Metamorphosis)
Prick Up Your Ears
Pride and Prejudice
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Pride and Prejudice CD3
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Pride and Prejudice CD6
Pride and Prejudice The Making of
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Prime of Miss Jean Brodie The CD1
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Prince and the Showgirl The
Princess Blade The
Princess Bride The
Princess Diaries The CD1
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Princess Mononoke
Princess Of Thieves
Princess and the Warrior The
Prisoner of Second Avenue The
Private Life of Sherlock Holmes The (1970)
Private Parts
Producers The
Profondo rosso
Project A CD1
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Psycho (1960)
Psycho - Collectors Edition
Public Enemy (2002 Korean) CD1
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Public Enemy The
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Purple Rose Of Cairo The
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