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Sixteen Candles CD1

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[Radio Announcer] It looks good.
On the northwest toll, eastbound traffic is moving nicelly this morning...
frrom Beecham Road down to River Road.
Westbound, there's now a 20-car backup at the Devon Avenue toll.
And on the northbound l-290 extension at Thorndale Avenue,
we had a spinout there.
And that car was blocking the right-hand lane...
and also blocking the lane that's coming offi ofr the, uh,
eastbound Thorndale Avenue entrance ramp...
leading to the northbound, uh, l-290 extension.
- This was causing a backup to Irving Park. We have... - [Paper Bangs Door]
[Alarm Blaring]
Come on, chop-chop. We got relatives invading this afternoon.
Ginny, Mike, Sara, Sam! Come on. Everybody up!
##[Loud Rock]
Oh, I think I have a fever.
You don't have a fever.
Shut your face. Make me.
[Phone Ringing] Dad, Mike hit me!
[Mike] You liar. Mike, come on, pal. We got a wedding tomorrow.
Try to cooperate, will ya? Dad, I didn't hit her.
I'd like to very much, and I probably will later, but gimme a break.
You know my method. I don't hit her when you're just down the hall.
Pick on someone your own size.
Open this door.
Daddy, I'm the one getting married.
[Dad] Not until tomorrow. I've got a mouthfrul ofr toothpaste.
I happen to have a serious problem.
She got her period. Should make for an interesting honeymoon, huh?
- Where are you learning that stuff? - School.
Good. Gettin' my money's worth.
[Radio Announcer] Thely were frantastic. Just great. What a great crowd.
And it was so much frun... [Man] #It's a good thing you don't have busfrare #
#It would frall through the hole in lyour pocket and lyou'd lose it #
#In the snow on the ground #
# You gotta walk into town to find a job #
# You're trying to keep your hands warm #
##[Continues] Chronologically, you're 16 today.
you're still 15. [Sighs]
Nope. I look exactly the same as I have since summer.
Utterly forgettable.
No, I didn't expect to wake up transformed.
I just thought that turning 16 would be so major...
that I'd wake up with an improved mental state that would show on my face.
All it shows is that I don't have any sort of a tan left.
[Sighs] I better get downstairs.
My family's probably pissed off I haven't let them wish me happy birthday yet.
All right. I'll see you at school.
You need four inches of bod and a great birthday.
Where's my briefcase? [Mike] Where'd lyou leave it?
Don't be a smart-ass. Okay, I'll be a dumb-ass.
[Sara] You alreadly are.
Okay, where's Sam? Where's my briefcase?
Sam? Allow me, Brenda. Hey, birth defect!
[Brenda] You missed breakfrast again.
[Dad] It wasn't mly idea to give her her own phone line.
[Sara, Mike Arguing] [Brenda] Grab a doughnut.
It's small. It's brown. It's made of leather.
It has my initials on it. And I believe... that's it.
[Car Horn Honking] Don't forget the grandparents are coming this afternoon.
Are we still having dinner with the Rice Chex? Rizczechs. 8:00 at the club.
You'd better learn their names. As of tomorrow, they're family.
That's a lovely thought. Hmm.
When it comes your turn to get married, do me a favor. Elope.
Who'd marry her? Mr. T.
I'm sorry, you'll have to buy lunch today. I didn't have time to fix your carrots.
She's only eating carrots to increase the size of her breasts.
Mister, lyou had better shape up, or lyou will miss your sister's wedding.
Now, don't give me that pouty look of yours.
You can eat your carrots when you get home.
That's it? You don't have anything else to say to me today?
What would you like me to say, Sam?
Come on now, honey. You're gonna miss the bus.
Have a good day.
I can't believe this.
They fucking forgot my birthday.
I'm sure they didn't forget your birthday.
They just didn't remember it right away. Same difference.
It's a drag your sweet 16's the day before Ginny gets married.
But big deal. They'll remember. Oh, easy for you to say.
Did anyone ever forget your birthday? Come on, Sam.
Everything's getting shittier. My family forgetting my birthday just makes it more vivid.
What do you expect, a breakfast birthday party?
No, but they could have at least said "happy birthday." It was just like any other day.
Why don't you remind them?
They'll feel some massive guilt. It could be highly profitable.
I wouldn't stoop to remind them.
Since I was about 12, I've been looking forward to my sweet 16.
You know, a big party and a band, with tons of people. Tons of people.
And a big Trans Am in the driveway with a ribbon around it.
And some incredibly gorgeous guy that you meet in France.
And you do it on a cloud without getting pregnant or herpes.
I don't need the cloud. Just a pink Trans Am and the guy, right?
A black one. A black guy?
A black Trans Am. A pink guy. [Laughing]
[Bell Ringing] [Together] Oh, no.
[Woman] # To those nice, nice nights #
#I remember alwalys alwalys #
#I got such a frright #
#Seeing them in mly dark cupboard #
# With mly great big cake #
- #lfr thely were me lfr thely were me # - [Yawning]
#And I was lyou And I was lyou #
#lfr thely were me lfr thely were me #
#And I was lyou And I was lyou #
#lfr thely were me and I was lyou #
# Would lyou have liked a present too #
#Happly, happly birthdaly in a hot bath #
# To those nice, nice nights #
#I remember alwalys alwalys #
#I got such a frright #
#Seeing them in mly dark cupboard #
# With mly great big cake #
#lfr thely were me lfr thely were me #
#And I was lyou And I was lyou #
#lfr thely were me lfr thely were me #
#And I was lyou And I was lyou #
#lfr thely were me and I was lyou # [Sighing]
# Would lyou have liked a present too #
#Happly birthdaly Happly birthdaly #
#Happly birthdaly Happly birthdaly #
#Happly birthdaly Happly birthdaly #
#Happly birthdaly Happly birthdaly # [Sighs]
[Snoring Softly]
#Happly birthdaly Happly birthdaly #
#Happly birthdaly Happly birthdaly ##
You swear to God, you don't have it? I don't know anything about it.
Jennifer Woods gave me a sex test during child development.
And I was supposed to do it and pass it to you in independent study.
[Sighing] I'm totally screwed. Did you put your name on it?
Hi. No, but it was really embarrassing.
I had to name who I'd do it with if I ever did it.
Who'd you name?
Jake Ryan. Jake Ryan? He doesn't even know you exist.
Thank you. That's a very nice thing to say.
I'm sorry. ButJake Ryan?
He's a senior, and he's taken. I mean, really taken.
I know. It was supposed to be my ideal.
He's ideal, for sure, but forget it.
God, I hope whoever got the note doesn't know it was me who wrote it.
I'd shit twice and die.
Do you know Samantha Baker?
Sophomore, right?
Yeah. What do you think of her?
I don't.
Would you ever go out with her?
Depends on how much you paid me.
She's not ugly.
There's nothin' there, man.
It's not ugly. It's just... void.
You know what I mean? There's somethin' about her.
I do independent study with her. I catch her lookin' at me a lot.
It's kinda cool, the way she's always lookin' at me.
Maybe she's retarded.
I'm bein' serious, okay?
She looks at me like she's in love with me.
Jake, she's a child.
So? So what're you gonna do with her?
She's obviously too young to party serious.
Maybe I'm interested in more than a party.
Come on, Jake. You talk like you're hard up.
You got Caroline. Now she's a woman.
It's unbelievable.
I swear to God, Caroline Mulford had to flunk about nine grades.
[Girl] Trully makes me ill.
[Samantha] She's perfect.
Practically impossible to cut up. She's supposedly real sweet.
Brother's deafr, and everybodly in the world worships her.
[Samantha] And she's going with Jake.
Oh, I'm gonna kill myself.
My man.
##[Band Instruments Practicing, Offi-kely]
[Kids Chattering]
I loathe the bus.
[Noise Subsides]
There has to be a more dignified mode of transportation.
I hope you get a car for your birthday, and a license.
[Scoffs] Let's not hold our breath.
[Space Guns Firing] [Both Chuckle]
[Together] Score... a direct hit.
[Together] On second thought.
##[Offi-kely Instruments Continue]
##[Kazoos Plalying Brahms's 'Hungarian Dance No. 5"]
#Hely ##
[Driver] Move it.!
Call me, okay? You call me first. Tell me what happened at home.
I can tell you right now. Nothing.
Will you quit feeling sorry for yourself? It's bad for your complexion!
##['Theme frrom Dragnet"]
How's it goin'?
How's what going?
You know, things, life, whatnot.
Life is not whatnot, and it's none of your business.
[Pages Ruffling]
Hmm. So you goin' to the new faces dance tonight, or...
That's also none of your business.
[Sniffing, Clears Throat]
Are you inhibited about dancing in public?
I mean, you don't have to dance.
Maybe you could just stand there with me and my dudes and just be you, and... -
Sounds major. [Sniffing]
So, I mean, what's the story? I mean, you got a guy, or...
Yes, three big ones, and they lust wimp blood.
So quit bugging me, or I'll sic them all over your weenie ass.
You know, I'm getting input here that I'm reading as relatively hostile.
I mean, it's just... Go to hell.
Very hostile.
Come on, what's the problem here? I'm a boy, you're a girl.
Is there anything wrong with me tryin' to put together some kind of relationship between us?
Look, I know you have to go. Just answer one question.
Yes, you're a total fag.
[Laughing] That's not the question. [Brakes Squealing]
Am I turning you on?
[Door Squeaking]
[Sighing] It's encouraging.
Very encouraging. Yeah, uh-huh.
You know, a girl with a hat is just so... Whew.
So vogue. Uh, y-yeah.
##['Theme From The Twilight Zone"]
Where are my blue socks, Dorothy?
You mean lyou didn't pack them? Oh, not again, Howard.
Can't I trust you to do anything?
Do lyou expect me to do all the packing?
Well, at least I brought this for you. It...
Sam.! [Sighing] Samantha.
Look. Oh, look.
- Hi! - Hi!
Oh, God.
[Laughing] Oh, sweetheart!
My goodness, are you a sight for sore eyes. [Kissing]
[Laughing] Oh, good!
Just look. How are you, my little lamb chop? Hello!
I'm fine, Grandpa.
- How are you guys? - Oh, prettly good. Ofr course, I get lower back pain.
Oh, my corns are killing me. My arthritis in my fingers bothers me quite a bit...
So are you, uh... You're sleeping up here?
Yeah. Yeah.
Your grandfather Fred jumped our claim on Sara's room. So here we are up here.
Well, I haven't seen you in a while. Do I look any older today?
Oh, no, no. I wouldn't say so. Do you think so?
[Dorothly] No. Oh, I hope it isn't cold tomorrow.
You know Ginnly.
It's not gonna be cold. She'll refuse to wear a coat over her wedding dress.
If she does, you mustn't bug her... I'm not gonna bug her...
I'm gonna go set mlyselfr up in Mike's room. So I'll see lyou gulys later.
- [Dorothly] Okaly, sweetheart. - Look, there she goes.
Your grandpa and I are looking forward to a nice, long visit with you.
Aces. [Howard] We certainlly are.
[Laughing] See you a little later, darling. We've got a lot to...
[Sighing] I swear to God, this has got to be a joke.
Grandparents forgetting a birthday?
They live for that shit. [Toilet Flushing]
# Put my arms around you ##
Well, well, if it isn't Sammy Baker...
Davis, Junior. [Chortling]
Hi, Grandpa. Oh, I've got one for ya.
Knock, knock. Who's there?
Who. Who, who?
Helen, we've got an owl out here in the hall. [Chortling]
Oh, Fred, Fred, leave her alone.
You'll make her tinkle. Oh, come on, Helen.
Oh, Sam, let me look at you.
Fred, she's gotten her boobies.
[Fred Chortling] I'd better go get mly magnifying glass.
Oh, and they are so perky!
[Sighing] I can't believe my grandmother actually felt me up.
[Gong Clangs]
What's happenin', hot stuff?
His name is Long Duk Dong. [Gong Clangs]
What? Long Duk Dong.
He came down with Grandma and Grandpa Baker.
He's an exchange student that's living with them.
Yeah, well, he's totally bizarre. He is not.
He is a very sweet boy.
I just hope you burn the sheets and mattresses after he leaves.
I don't suppose it makes any difference to you,
but there's a very weird Chinese guy up in Mike's room.
Ginny dumped Rudy. He's her new fiancée.
[Brenda] Mike, stop it.
Sam, honey, do you think you could help the grandmothers with supper?
Dad and I have to go to the club for dinner with the Rice Chex.
Rizczechs. Oh. Rizczechs.
Uh, do you think that there's any reason...
that I should possibly stay home tonight?
Well, it might be nice if you'd visit...
with your grandparents and Long Duk Dong.
Who? [Gong Clangs]
The weird Chinese guy in Mike's room. Oh.
- I think I have a dance to go to. - Well, that's okay.
Oh, can you remember to turn off the stove in 20 minutes?
I can remember lots of things.
[Sighing] This is the single worst day of my entire life.
What the hell are you bitchin' about?
I gotta sleep under some Chinaman named after a duck's dork.
Well, where am I sleeping?
Sofa City, sweetheart.
## [Heavy Metal]
Do you think Grandpa Fred's going to embarrass me?
I don't know why not. He does to everyone else.
He already asked me if Rudy was the oily variety bohunk.
Is he? Don't be cute.
I reallly love Rudly.
And he is totally enamored of me.
I mean, I've had men who've loved me before,
but not for six months in a row.
I think I'm in love.
So how long have lyou been in love, hmm?
Well, it hasn't really happened yet.
So what's the deal?
I'm not sure that he knows I exist.
Sam, I really don't have time for this.
[Sighing] Well, I'm sorry.
I always listen to you talk about your boyfriends.
Darling, is something bothering you?
You're really acting like... an asshole.
And I think I know what it is.
I think you're jealous that I'm getting married...
and that I'm getting all the attention, hmm?
[Sighing] You know, everybody in this family...
has just gone totally Outer Limits.
No, Sam.
I think you're just being a little selfish and immature.
[Sighing] Oh, yes. That's it.
That's exactly it.
[Laughing] Unbelievable.
You make someone a bridesmaid, and they shit all over you.
[Gong Clangs]
Very clever dinner.
Appetizing food fit neatly into interesting round pie.
- It's a quiche. - Hmm. How do you spell?
Well, lyou don't spell it, son. You eat it. [Guffiawing]
Dong has only been in our country a short time, Fred.
- I think we could all help him assimilate. - [Chortling] Oh.
[Dorothly] Long Duk Dong is about lyour age, Sam.
You two should have a lot to chat about.
I love, uh, visiting with Grandma and Grandpa...
and writing letters to parents...
and pushing lawn-mowing machine...
so Grandpa's hyena don't get disturbed.
- Hernia! - [Fred Chortling]
Oh, lyes, lyes, lyes, indeedly.
He does the dishes and helps with the laundry. You betcha.
[All Chuckling] May I be excused?
Where are you going?
I have a dance to go to... at school.
It's a very important dance.
Uh, we're being graded on it... for gym.
Wait a minute. I have a wonderful idea.
Would you like to go to the dance with Sam?
[Gong Clangs]
[Arguing, Indistinct]
I wonder ifJake's here.
I don't think it's healthy to get jacked about some guy that isn't a thing yet.
Yeah, when you don't have anything, you don't have anything to lose, right?
That's a cheerful thought.
Let's go make ourselves available.
##['Peter Gunn"]
[Kids Chattering]
That's the one, dude. Scope it out.
She doesn't look like a freshman. Sophomore, dude. Sophomore.
Fullly aged sophomore meat.
[Sonar Pinging]
We do the bus together. You talk to her?
Talk? Dude, I have a relationship with her. Get out.
Figure to, like, 17 digits.
You are such a liar.
We'll see about that, my man.
By night's end, I predict me and her will interface.
##[Slow, Romantic]
#Ahh #
#Ahh #
#I know this #
#Much is true #
#Ahh #
#I know this... ## Check it out, Wease.
Pretty intense, huh? Over. To the max. Over.
- [Gasping] - All right.
##[New Wave Rock] I knew you'd come around.
Whoa. Christ.
Crank that, sister! #Whoa #
Very hot. Very hot.
This night... This night is happenin'.
#Whoa, whoa, whoa ##
I'm blowing your mind, aren't I?
I'm just getting warmed up. [Growls]
[Loud Flatulent Noise]
Ow. Excuse me.
##[Continues In Distance]
Way to go, dick-face. She took off.
Don't spaz out. Okay, Wease? The situation'll come on-line.
Yeah? I'll bet you a dozen floppy disks you don't even get tit.
You got a bet, scumbag. I'll get it all.
Take off. You wouldn't be able to prove it anyway.
"A," don't hit me.
Secondly, what kind of proof do you want?
Video. Video.
No way. I can just see the thing getting duped a thousand times...
and winding up on cable somewhere.
Try again.
Underpants. Underpants.
No problem, butt-lick.
[Together] Girls' underpants. # One, two #
#And lyour girlfrriend sweet little 17 # [Gasping]
#She's got her lalyered hair and her flaredjeans #
# You know what that means She's just a little queen #
#She shares lyour London flat #
#She thinks that London's where it's at #
#Although it stinks and when it rains you wear lyour hat #
#And lyour plum-colored PVC wet-look maxi mac #
# You tie lyour ginger hair back in a bun # [Nose Blowing]
# You're the ugliest creature under the sun #
So what's your name?
What's your first name?
What's your middle name?
I bet all the boys chase you plenty in the school, huh?
Nobody's caught me yet.
Hmm. I betcha you big teaser, huh?
[Laughing] No. I run the 40 in five flat.
Hey. Oh, I'm really sorry, man.
Whatever I did was an accid... l-l-I didn't mean to...
You... You were dancin' with a girl?
Oh, man, I'm really... I'm really sorry, man.
I must've been on drugs five minutes ago. Do you know her?
She grabbed me, guy. I'm totally innocent. Is she yours?
##[Ends] What do you know about her?
##[Begins] She has smallish tits. Decent voice.
Smells pretty good. She drives me crazy.
Did she come here with you?
No, no. But if it's okay with my dad, she's goin' home with me.
Excuse me.
[Girls Giggling]
[Girl #1] Do you guys want to blow off this dance?
- [Caroline] Yes. - [Girl #1] I am bored to the brink of insanity.
- [Girl #2] And go where? - Jake's parent's aren't home. We can do his house.
- How's it goin'? - Fine.
[Caroline] Let's partly light. Jake's paranoid about his house getting trashed.
[Girl #1] Again.!
# One single moment The hours I spend #
##[Continues, Indistinct]
[Thud] Oof!
All right.
Just tryin' to get a little bit of water.
Yes, I'm back.
So I smell.
It's my shaving cream.
You wanna feel a real clean, close shave? I'll pass.
Couldn't find anyone else to bug, huh?
Come on. You know you're the one I want to bug, huh?
This is my friend, Randy. And that's Jimmy Montrose.
Howdy, dude. This is Farmer Fred.
Ted. Oh, I'm sorry. This is Farmer Ted.
I'm not really a farmer. I'm a freshman.
Geek, can I be honest with you?
Not if you're gonna insult me.
Okay. [All Laughing]
- Get the hell outta here. - Nice! Nice manners, babe!
She's totally serious, ass-wipe.
You wanna split with me? L...
I don't know. You know, my mom, I can't handle this.
she tells me, "You want somethin', you gotta ask for it."
I mean, I'm not the kinda guy...
It's embarrassing for me. I don't know. I just...
It's just...
[Footsteps Approaching]
[Crashing, Rattling]
[Rattling Continues]
I'm really sorry about what happened in the gym.
l-I had no idea you couldn't dance.
[Metal Clattering]
What a decent night, huh? It's my birthday.
[Imitating Guitar] #You say it's your birthday #
# It's my birthday too ##
## [Imitating Guitar] Don't do that, okay?
# Hey, Jude ## Just stop it, okay?
I mean, it's really been a shitty birthday for me.
No offense, but I don't need a serenade right how.
What's wrong? You didn't get anything good, or...
I didn't get shit. Not even a "happy birthday."
My whole family just sort of blew it off.
I'd freak if my family forgot my birthday. It's a brand-new year.
I'm 16. Everything should be platinum.
I should be happy, right? Right? Yeah.
Well, I can't get happy.
It is physically impossible for me to get happy.
Would you feel better if you knew one of my secrets, or...
Don't gross me out.
No, we're not talking gross here.
No. It's... It's just embarrassing.
[Exhaling] This information cannot leave this room, okay?
It would devastate my reputation as a dude.
No problem.
[Clears Throat]
I've never bagged a babe.
I'm not a stud.
I got the rep in sixth grade.
And it, like, it stuck with me.
I'm still on hold.
Look, I'd appreciate you not laughing here, okay? [Laughing]
I'm sorry.
That's not what I meant.
I meant...
Hey, time out, junior. [Horn Honking]
Pardon me.
It's okay.
I meant that it's okay that you did it once,
but I didn't mean for you to do it again!
I'm sorry.
[Sighing] Sorry.
You know, just now I really felt how much you like me.
You're probably zoning in on my brain waves or something.
Well, not really. I felt it on my leg.
Come on. I don't want to see it!
Sorry if I embarrassed you.
I'm not embarrassed.
Fresh breath's a priority in my life.
I don't want to hurt your feelings,
'cause it's really human of you to listen to my bullshit.
I care about it, really. I mean...
I know I came on kinda like a poozer on the bus tonight and everything.
But that's just so my friends won't think, you know, I'm a jerk.
But they're all pretty much jerks, though, aren't they?
Yeah, but the thing is, I'm kinda like the leader.
Kinda like the king of the dipshits.
Well, that's pretty cool. Hey, but a lot can happen over a year.
I mean, you could come back next fall as a completely normal person.
Yeah? Sure.
Would it be totally off the wall if...
if I asked if I could have sex with you?
Yeah, well, you askin' me is not as off the wall as why I won't.
- V.D.? - [Laughing] No.
I'm sorta saving myself.
It's really stupid. He doesn't even know I exist.
Jake Ryan.
You likeJake?
Ja... Jake's my boy!
I just talked toJake in the gym.
He asked me about you. Did not!
He did too. He did! He asked me what you were like.
Oh, my... Oh! If you're lying, I'll beat the crap outta you. I'm not lying.
Oh, my God! What should I do? Should I go up to him?
Should I say, "Hi, Jake, I'm Samantha"? Maybe I should let him come to me.
This is not my department. But what if I let him come to me, and he forgets?
What if he changes his mind? Then I'm totally screwed, right?
Apparently so. [Sighing]
What would you do if you were me?
I'm a gamblin' man by nature.
And, um, I'd go for it.
This is so strange. But I think I will. Oh, you're the best.
- Wait, um... - What?
Do you know anything about floppy disks?
We'll talk about this on the bus, okay? The thing is, I got a problem.
Floppy disks are pretty expensive.
I made a bet with my friends, the... the dipshits.
I bet them that I'd do it with you.
This was before I knew you. I can get proof without getting physical.
Can I borrow your underpants for ten minutes?
#Hope lyou're freelin'#
# Time #
I think it's time to blow this thing off and go to your house. Yeah?
I told Tracy and Robin and those guys to come to your parents' house, okay?
I told 'em not to tell anybody.
God, I love it when your parents are out of town,
I fantasize that I'm your wife,
and we're the richest, most popular adults in town.
I owe all my great weekends to you.
What's your problem? What?
You've been acting weird all night. Are you screwing around?
Me? Are you crazy?
I don't know, Jake.
I'm getting strange signals. Well, they're not comin' from me.
Everything's fine. Don't have a cow.
Just remember one thing.
I can name 20 guys who'd kill to love me.
Is that a threat? It's a fact, Jake.
Come on. Before we get in a big, wicked fight, let's get outta here, huh?
Hi, Jake. I'm Samantha. How's it goin'?
Do you got a cigarette?
Jake, this may sound incredibly dumb,
but I love you, and I'll do anything to make you love me.
I love your shirt.
Jake, you're not gonna believe this,
but I had this very bizarre dream, and you were in it.
[Man] For heaven's sake.! Get in there and dance.!
I can't. They won't like me! I'm not gonna tell you again!
Just act like a man! I wanna go home.! I wanna be with lyou gulys.!
[Woman] # You-ou are mly desire #
# You... You are mly desire #
# You-ou are mly desire #
# Oh, bably, lyou, lyou, lyou you are mly desire #
# Got to find lyou Know lyou're out there #
[Sighing] I can't believe I'm such a jerk.
##[Continues] He smiles at me, and I don't say anything.
And I can't believe I gave my panties to a geek.
What year are you? Freshman.
Gimme a buck.
Get in.
[All Chattering]
Shut up! [Chatter Stops]
Ted, go for it.
[All Gasping]
[Gong Clangs]
[Tires Screeching]
Hey, uh, listen, uh,
I wanna thank you for, uh, loanin' me the Donger.
[Car Horns Honking]
He's really bitchin'. [Coughs]
That's okay. You guys make a great couple.
I never been so happy in my whole life. You maniac!
[Both Giggling]
Now I have a place to put my hand. Mmm.
So basically, Jimmy, my business is video game arcades,
laundry, cigarette machines... [Belching]
and trucking.
I dabble a little bit in personal loans and politics.
##['Love Theme From The Godfather"]
Very nice.
I think that all that really matters is that the kids are happy together.
Just as long as my beautiful boy remembers...
that marrying this one means he's out of the girl of the month club.
- Hey, wait a minute. I can still look. - [Laughing, Snorting]
I just can't touch. Right?
Oh, sensitive, uh? [Laughing] Rudy!
- Cheers. - Right on. [Slurps]
Ahh! You do shots?
Come on, wolfr it.
Whoo! [Laughing]
[Brakes Squealing]
Uh, good night, Marlene. See you later, Dong.
Sammy, tell Grandpa not to wait up. Let's go boogie.
- Sure. - [Tires Screeching]
Donger's here for five hours, and he's got somebody.
I live here my whole life, and I'm like a disease.
[Sighing] [Tires Screeching]
- # We're hangin'out in Vinnie's car # - [Chattering]
# We like the reallly loud guitar #
#Don't ever seem to get too frar #
#Spend all our monely in a bar #
[Chattering, Shouting] ##[Continues]
[Slurred Voice] Everybody,
I'd like you to meet my boyfriend Jake.
Jake, this is... everybody.
[Man] Take it offi.
All right, whose is this?
You're such a poop.
[Brakes Squealing] [People Screaming]
[Metal Clattering]
#FarmerJohn # Woof!
#I'm in love with lyour daughter #
[Girl Panting] Oh, no. Easy, easy, easy.
##[Loud Rock] [Kids Chattering, Laughing]
[Headgear Beeping] Shit, Ted, that's my mom. I gotta get home.
Change your frequency. Don't be such a wimp!
[People Laughing, Chattering Loudlly]
Take those ridiculous things off, okay?
Will you guys grow up?
Ted, won't we get pounded if we go to a senior party?
Wease, we got $70, and we got a pair of girl's underpants.
We're safe as kittens. Okay?
This is a great social opportunity for us.
Come on!
Do not embarrass me, okay? For sure, we won't.
Will you fix your hair, Bryce? I already did.
Wease, close your barn, all right?
And be polite to his parents. Okay. Great.
[Gong Clangs]
Hey, come on in and party hearty, dude persons. [Hiccups]
[Laughing Crazilly]
He's from out of town, okay? He speaks English, right?
Don't be such faggots! Man, shut up.
Kidding. Sorry. [Dong Continues Laughing]
Think we're gonna die?
[Tones Beeping]
[Ringing Continues] Did you put the cat out?
We don't have a cat.
Come on, damn it. Answer.
Mmm. [Sighs]
Aw, eat me.
[Click, Dial Tone] Who is it?
Well, what did they want?
##[Loud Rock]
[Kids Chattering]
[Girl] Whoo.
[Gasps] Geek!
Very nice! We're five minutes in...
I'm at a loss.
Real smooth, Cliff.
[Gong Clangs] Ooh.
I've never been out with a boy before.
Oh, me neither.
[Ringing] [Grunts]
[Caroline] Jake?
Where are you, Jake?
Jakey, have you stopped loving me?
SLC Punk
SNL Best Of Eddie Murphy 1998
S Diary 2004
Saathiya CD1
Saathiya CD2
Saaya CD1
Saaya CD2
Sahara (1943)
Sahara (with Michael Palin) ep1
Sahara (with Michael Palin) ep2
Sahara (with Michael Palin) ep3
Sahara (with Michael Palin) ep4
Sahara (with Michael Palin) video diary bonus
Sahara interview with Michael Palin
Saint Clara
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Salaam Bombay CD2
Salaam Cinema 1995
Salems Lot 2004 CD1
Salems Lot 2004 CD2
Salesman - Albert and David Maysles (1969)
Salo Or The 120 Days Of Sodom
Salton Sea The
Salvador (1986)
Salvatore Giuliano (Francesco Rosi 1961) CD1
Salvatore Giuliano (Francesco Rosi 1961) CD2
Samourai Le
Samsara 1991 CD1
Samsara 1991 CD2
Samurai - Miyamoto Musashi - 03 - Duel at Ganryu Island
Samurai 2 (1955)
Samurai 3 - Duel At Ganryu Island 1956
Samurai Assassin 1965
Samurai Fiction
Sanbiki No Samurai 1964
Sand Pebbles The CD1
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Sands of Iwo Jima
Sanjuro (1962)
Santa Claus 2
Sante Trap The
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Satans Brew 1976
Saturday Night Fever CD1
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Satyajit Ray - Apu Trilogy 2 Aparajito (1957)
Sauvage Innocence 2001 CD1
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Savage Innocents The 1959
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Saved 2004
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Saving Private Ryan CD3
Saving Silverman (R Rated Version)
Saw 2004
Say It Isnt So 2001
Scalphunters The (1968)
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Scar The (1976) CD1
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Scaramouche CD1
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Scarecrow - (Kakashi) 25fps 2001
Scarlet Diva
Scarlet Empress The (1934)
Scarlet Empress The - Criterion Collection
Scary Movie
Scary Movie 2
Scene At The Sea A (Japanese)
Scenes From A Marriage (1973) CD1
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Scenes from a Marriage CD3
Scenes from a Marriage CD4
Scenes from a Marriage CD5
Scenes from a Marriage CD6
Schippers van de Kameleon CD1
Schippers van de Kameleon CD2
School Of Flesh The
School of Rock
Schussangst (2003)
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Scrooged (1988)
Second Nature
Secondhand Lion
Seconds (1966)
Secret Admirer
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Secret Agents Into the Heart of the CIA
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Secret Lives of Dentist The
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Secret life of Walter Mitty The (1947)
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Secretary (2002)
Secrets of Women
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See Spot Run
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Seven Brides for Seven Brothers
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Seven Samurai (1956)
Seven Year Itch The
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Sex Is Comedy
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Sex and Lucia (Unrated Spanish Edition)
Sex and Zen
Sex and the City 3x13 - Escape From New York
Sex and the City 3x14 - Sex And Another City
Sex and the City 3x15 - Hot Child in the City
Sex and the City 3x16 - Frenemies
Sex and the City 3x17 - What Goes Around Comes Around
Sex and the City 3x18 - Cock A Doodle Do
Sex is zero
Sex lives of the potato men
Sexo Con Amor 2003
Sexy Beast
Sexy Beast 2000
Seytan 1974
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She Creature
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Sherlock Holmes - Hound of the Baskervilles
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Sherlock Holmes - The Pearl Of Death 1944
Sherlock Holmes - The Sign of Four
Sherlock Holmes 1x01 - A Scandal In Bohemia
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Sherlock Holmes And The Voice Of Terror 1942
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Sherlock Holmes Returns
Sherlock Holmes The Eligible Bachelor
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Shes All That
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Shield The 2x01 - The Quick Fix
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Shijushichinin No Shikaku (1994 aka 47 Ronin)
Shiki-Jitsu (Hideaki Anno 2000)
Shin Zatoichi monogatari (1963)
Shine (1996)
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Shinning The
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Shiryour gari
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Shogun 1980 Part 1
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Shop Around The Corner The 1940
Short Circuit 2
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Short Film About Killing A (1988)
Short Film About Love A (1988)
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Shot In The Dark A
Show Me Love
Show Time
Shredder (Greg Huson 2003)
Shree 420
Shrek 2
Shriek if You Know What I Did Last Friday the 13th
Shuang tong (2002)
Shutter (2004)
Sib - The Apple
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Sibling Rivalry
Siburay Bate Cafe
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Siege The (1998)
Siegfried I
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Silence of the Lambs The
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Silent Trigger 1996
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Silver City
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Simon and Garfunkel - The Concert in Central Park
Simon of the Desert
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Simpsons 01x01 - Simpsons Roasting Over An Open Fire
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Simpsons 01x06 - Moaning Lisa
Simpsons 01x07 - The Call of the Simpsons
Simpsons 01x08 - The Telltale Head
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Simpsons 01x10 - Homers Night Out
Simpsons 01x11 - The Crepes Of Wrath
Simpsons 01x12 - Krusty Gets Busted
Simpsons 01x13 - Some Enchanted Evening
Simpsons The
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Simpsons The 05x02 - Cape Feare
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Simpsons The 05x06 - Marge On The Lam
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Simpsons The 05x08 - Boy Scoutz N The Hood
Simpsons The 05x09 - The Last-Temptation Of Homer
Simpsons The 05x10 - $pringfield
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Simpsons The 05x12 - Bart Gets Famous
Simpsons The 05x13 - Homer And Apu
Simpsons The 05x14 - Lisa Vs Malibu Stacy
Simpsons The 05x15 - Deep Space Homer
Simpsons The 05x16 - Homer Loves Flanders
Simpsons The 05x17 - Bart Gets An Elephant
Simpsons The 05x18 - Burns Heir
Simpsons The 05x19 - Sweet Seymour Skinners Baadasssss Song
Simpsons The 05x20 - The Boy Who Knew Too Much
Simpsons The 05x21 - Lady Bouviers Lover
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Sin 2003
Sin noticias de Dios
Sinbad - Legend Of The Seven Seas
Since Otar Left 2003
Since You Went Away CD1
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Sinful Nuns of Saint Valentine
Singin in the Rain
Singing Detective The
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Sink The Bismarck
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Sirens 1994
Sirocco 1951
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Sister Act
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Six Days Seven Nights
Six Degrees of Separation (1993)
Six Feet Under
Six String Samurai
Six Strong Guys (2004)
Sixteen Candles CD1
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Sixth Sense The
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Skazka o tsare Saltane
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Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow
Slap Shot
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Slaughterhouse Five
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Sleepless in Seattle
Sleepwalkers 1992
Sleepy Hollow 1999
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Sliding Doors 1992
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So Close 2002
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Sol Goode
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Soldier CD1
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Soldiers Story A (Norman Jewison 1984)
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Sombre 25fps 1998
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Someone Special
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Son In Law
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Song of the South
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Soul Keeper The (2003)
Soul Plane
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South Park 01x06 - Death
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Soylent Green 1973
Spacehunter 1983
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Spark the Lighter
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Spawn (1997)
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Species 3 CD1
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Speed 2 - Cruise Control
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Springtime In A Small Town
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Stargate SG1 1x01 Children of the Gods
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Stargate SG1 1x06 Cold Lazarus
Stargate SG1 1x07 The Nox
Stargate SG1 1x08 Brief Candle
Stargate SG1 1x09 Thors Hammer
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Stargate SG1 1x11 Bloodlines
Stargate SG1 1x12 Fire and Water
Stargate SG1 1x13 Hathor
Stargate SG1 1x14 Singularity
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Stargate SG1 1x17 Solitudes
Stargate SG1 1x18 Tin Man
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Stargate SG1 2x03 Prisoners
Stargate SG1 2x04 The gamekeeper
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Stargate SG1 2x21 1969
Stargate SG1 3x01 Into The Fire II
Stargate SG1 3x02 Seth
Stargate SG1 3x03 Fair Game
Stargate SG1 3x04 Legacy
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Stargate SG1 3x06 Point Of View
Stargate SG1 3x07 Deadman Switch
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Stargate SG1 3x16 Urgo
Stargate SG1 3x17 A Hundred Days
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Stargate SG1 3x19 New Ground
Stargate SG1 3x20 Maternal Instinct
Stargate SG1 3x21 Crystal Skull
Stargate SG1 3x22 Nemesis
Stargate SG1 4x01 Small Victories
Stargate SG1 4x02 The Other Side
Stargate SG1 4x03 Upgrades
Stargate SG1 4x04 Crossroads
Stargate SG1 4x05 Divide And Conquer
Stargate SG1 4x06 Window Of Opportunity
Stargate SG1 4x07 Watergate
Stargate SG1 4x08 The First Ones
Stargate SG1 4x09 Scorched Earth
Stargate SG1 4x10 Beneath The Surface
Stargate SG1 4x11 Point Of No Return
Stargate SG1 4x12 Tangent
Stargate SG1 4x13 The Curse
Stargate SG1 4x14 The Serpents Venom
Stargate SG1 4x15 Chain Reaction
Stargate SG1 4x16 2010
Stargate SG1 4x17 Absolute Power
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Stargate SG1 4x20 Entity
Stargate SG1 4x21 Double Jeopardy
Stargate SG1 4x22 Exodus
Stargate SG1 5x01 Enemies
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Stargate SG1 5x03 Ascension
Stargate SG1 5x04 Fifth Man
Stargate SG1 5x05 Red Sky
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Stargate SG1 5x08 The Tomb
Stargate SG1 5x09 Between Two Fires
Stargate SG1 5x10 2001
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Stargate SG1 5x12 Wormhole X-Treme
Stargate SG1 5x13 Proving Ground
Stargate SG1 5x14 48 Hours
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Stargate SG1 5x17 Failsafe
Stargate SG1 5x18 The Warrior
Stargate SG1 5x19 Menace
Stargate SG1 5x20 The Sentinel
Stargate SG1 5x21 Meridian
Stargate SG1 5x22 Revelations
Stargate SG1 6x01 Redemption Part 1
Stargate SG1 6x02 Redemption Part 2
Stargate SG1 6x03 Descent
Stargate SG1 6x04 Frozen
Stargate SG1 6x05 Nightwalkers
Stargate SG1 6x06 Abyss
Stargate SG1 6x07 Shadow Play
Stargate SG1 6x08 The Other Guys
Stargate SG1 6x09 Allegiance
Stargate SG1 6x10 Cure
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Stargate SG1 6x12 Unnatural Selection
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Stargate SG1 6x16 Metamorphosis
Stargate SG1 6x17 Disclosure
Stargate SG1 6x18 Forsaken
Stargate SG1 6x19 The Changeling
Stargate SG1 6x20 Memento
Stargate SG1 6x21 Prophecy
Stargate SG1 6x22 Full Circle
Stargate SG1 7x01 Fallen
Stargate SG1 7x02 Homecoming
Stargate SG1 7x03 Fragile Balance
Stargate SG1 7x04 Orpheus
Stargate SG1 7x05 Revisions
Stargate SG1 7x06 Lifeboat
Stargate SG1 7x07 Enemy Mine
Stargate SG1 7x08 Space Race
Stargate SG1 7x09 Avenger 2 0
Stargate SG1 7x10 Birthright
Stargate SG1 7x10 Heroes II
Stargate SG1 7x11 Evolution I
Stargate SG1 7x12 Evolution II
Stargate SG1 7x13 Grace
Stargate SG1 7x14 Fallout
Stargate SG1 7x15 Chimera
Stargate SG1 7x16 Death Knell
Stargate SG1 7x17 Heroes I
Stargate SG1 7x19 Resurrection
Stargate SG1 7x20 Inauguration
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Starship Troopers (Special Edition)
Starship Troopers 2
Story Of A Kiss
Strada La
Strange aventure de Docteur Molyneux
Street Of Love And Hope (Nagisa Oshima 1959)
Street of shame (Akasen chitai)
Streetcar Named Desire A
Style Wars
Suicide Regimen
Sukces 2003
Summer Tale A 2000
Sunday Lunch (2003)
Super 8 Stories
Superman IV - The Quest for Peace
Surviving the Game
Swedish Love Story A (1970) CD1
Swedish Love Story A (1970) CD2
Sweetest Thing The (Unrated Version)
Swept Away
Swordsman III - The East is Red
Sylvester - Canned Feud (1951)
Sylvester - Speedy Gonzales (1955)
Sylvester and Elmer - Kit for Cat (1948)
Sylvester and Porky - Scaredy Cat (1948)
Sylvester and Tweety - Canary Row (1950)
Sylvester and Tweety - Putty Tat Trouble (1951)
Sylvester and Tweety - Tweetys SOS (1951)