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Taxi

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-How much?|-4:32.Incredible!
an other record|before I leave!
keep the chronograph|there is no need
a speech ! a speech !
where is my little Daniel?
like you all know|Daniel resigned last night
He quits the 2 wheelers|for the 4 wheelers
He follow the reverse human evolution|that starts on all four,...
...and finishes on it's 2 wheels !
I want him to know|he was the best of all of us,...
...an most of all,|an very good friend.
You going be missed by all of us you know
excuse me lily, was that a kiss?|or you lips just slipped?
It's not that I didn't like that|but I don't know what to think anymore
Is it clearer now?
Yep.
Because if it slipped again,|you must be really awkward.
and Now to celebrate |Daniel's departure,...
...I announce the big parade!
Open you eyes wide , Lily,|because you wont see this often in you life.
-How many are they?|-A lot.
here are the bests.
go for it!
holy shit !
Excellent!
-So doind a little party?|-Are they from the pizzeria?
-Chicken-pizzas. -Excuses us but|we would like to see you papers.
I'm sorry we left them inside|if you want we can go get them now.
-Ok but make it fast. -No problem,|Thanks. lets run!.
it must have been 5 minutes now.
-beware there could be some oil.|-Oil?
Yeah, it's my flat|but it's also kinda of a Garage.
I hope that...
Humm, its ...special.
-Daniel.|-Yes?
It's been 2 years|that we know each other.
why did you waited the day you quit|to show me your flat?
-I'm really slow|to decide. -And what made you decide?
Your Cleavage.
It's nice , hey?
The dress is brand new.
Ok then|we will try not to damage it.
Are you sure it's okay|after all those years of friendship?
We prepared the terrain well,|it's time to build on it.
-Maybe we could wait a little bit more.|-No, If I wait more,...
...i'm worried that you take it badly|and I don't want to be impolite.
-Oh, no.|-What?
-It's 6 o'clock.|-but it's saturday.
-Yes, but I must go to work.|-What?
you just stopped working last night,|you didn't find a job during the night, no?
no, It's for my future job,...
...kind of meeting you booked|since a long time.
i thought you were waiting for our meeting|since a long time.
Yes, long time plus an hour.|And when I say 1 hour, it maximum.
Hey the blue, you take a number over there.
Don't forget |your pictures next time. 77!
247. It's not even near my number.
-how long have you been a driver?|-25 years yesterday.
I'm retired since this morning.
It's the first morning I can read calmly|the newspaper since 25 years.
Ah I see.
wake up number 247!
I am here!
your paper, 2 pictures...|sign here... and here.
profesional Licence,|circulation certificate,...
...aquisition autorisation ,|the notebook, the plate and the sign.
-That's all?|-Yes.
-Nothing more after 6 years?|-you want me to sing "la Marseilleise"?
No, but not really|a smile would have been nice.
248!
Lily!
It's 12:00, I went|to buy croissants...
...and, meanwhile, I married|the baker.
Goodbye and so long.
Congratulations, Mr. Daniel.|your welcome.
Yes, we insist.|ok then...
-Hi, Daniel!|-Hey, Paulo!
-your doing in the tourism now?|-Yes.
you party was super|we drank like hell.
-Yep, was great. But your bike sounds weird|is it ok. -What's wrong?
isn't a bizzare noise there?|it works well ?
hey what?|I use super-unleaded.
I just ran from 2 cops, you should have seen that.
Ok I tell you, 2 police|on bikes on the avenue.
When they shifted in first,|I was already on the beach.
They were furious.
Los dejé atrás a toda velocidad,|no podían creerlo.
Those 2 won't forget|Paulo that easily.
I confirm to you man|they did not forget you Paulo.
Hey Girls.|still wearing the moustache!?
go, Paulo.
hey girls going to the beach?|today it's free.
It will be a pleasure.|coming?
hey are you a "taxi",|or a nice taxi?
The driver|is super nice.
he opens the door, doesn't make you car sick,|don't speak if not asked to.
-and he brings the bags|if aske nicely. -Thank you, perfect.
And where are we going miss?
you see the pink house over there,|with a big door?
-yes, I see it.|-Ok, this is where we are going.
and you prefer a route |in particular?
Put all that in the kitchen,|I'll organise that later.
-YOu have enough foor for a week there.|-oh no, my son comes for lunch.
-eating all that in one meal ?|-No. sunday he prepare...
...all his meal |for the week,
is flat is so small |there is no kitchen.
and he unalbe to even| cook an egg.
Look.|it's im on the picture.
he's a computer geek.|He works at IBM.
-everybody has a prefered thing.|-And you. What is your "thing"?
I love driving, but|you probably didn't have time to see it!
My son had is driving|exam for the 8th time.
8 times !.|8 is my lucky number it will be good for him.
at the end of the street,|we are going to take the first...
on... on ...on?
on the Left,|Mr. Carbadec.
on the Left, on the Left!
on the Left! Are you crazy ? we are going to crash!
Holy shit! |¡I never saw such a stupid | idiot in 10 year I worked here!
Can't distingish is right from left ?
-Yes but you needed to tell me earlier.|-I should have sent a Fax?
LEFT LEFT! ¡Man it's no so difficult| to turn a steering and press a pedal!
-each one is duty.|-and you what is your duty?
where they hell they hire stupid like that.?
-in a circus, a zoo, at Bell Canada or what ?|-humm, a little bit of the 3.
-Ah you should have said it earlier.|-should have sent a Fax?
Excuse me.
Can I offer you something Mr.the lnspector?
Thank you it's superb.
Thanks to you. you are so nice,|I keeep your card.
I don't want to be rude| I need to go work, |is it ok if I eat in the Taxi?.
sure not go ahead,|go Work !
-Can you save my life?|-basically, no.
Depends on your symptoms.
I have a flight in 25 minutes.|If I miss it I'm a dead man.
if I catch it,|you are a rich man.
Humm... Mister is lucky.
I'm no doctor,...
...but I really like emergencies.|Bucke up please!.
Maybe we should go now.
C'est Parti ! (Here we go!).
a white taxi|doing incredible great speed!
-made my radar fall!|-We are taking care of it, got his licences?
-No didn't had the time it was too fast.|-open your eyes it's your job.
Do you think we are going to make it|on time?
Because if we miss it maybe|we should take our time.
It will be ok, going slow now,|but on the higway we will get speed.
Ah I see, I see.
Don't take those risks for me|I don't want you to loose your licence.
No problem,|I don't have licences.
Ah Fantastic.
14 minutes and 30 seconds.
Leaves you time to read the paper|and maybe a small cofee. Have a good trip Mr.
Thank you.
I don't understand.
On the computer I'm unbeatable.
first in Monaco,|8 pole positions.
But on the streets|I'm a disaster.
-Et? How did you do?|-no, didn't got it.
ah it's impossible. the champagne|is better with time,...
...but now it is almost|past date. what happened?
Just hit .a butcher shop|changes from paper stand.
You know what?
you should put a mouse in your car,|instead of your steering wheel.
Like the disabled,|What?
Come on...
Emilien, we just got,|an other record.
a taxi, near the harbor.|you know how fast?
-140?|-yes in first gear.
when he engaged the 2nd:|217 Km/h!
-you got it?|-yes, they called The air army.
Imagine at that speed.
hey you know the last one?|listen, it's funny.
what is the difference between|a comb and an egg?
-hey not really good listeners.|I'll come back later. -Yes.
much later, and if it's the night,|it's just better.
Next time,|knock before you enter!
Petra...
I didn't say that for you
Thanks, Emilien. So what happenned|with your licence, it went bad?
ah, the news goes fast.
I got news for your, the Chief doing a meeting now, and there's only you missing
Ah no... we weren't advised|YOu just have to push that button
you see there, it's written "power".
YOu hear me or what, I said in my office right now, are you deaf Emilien ?
No, Now I'm not anymore.
so guys, after hitting Netherland, Italian, Belgium Banks...
...Mercedes gang |just arrived in France
and the German must absolutely not invade our territory
my grandpa fell in their hands, I make it a personnal matter.
so the Paris-Bonn link, German French friendship, must kiss my ass
alright? No I don't mean you Petra.
you are German... right, but you are a cop so this is ok.
and they have the gut to select| the cities before hitting the banks!
It's unbelievable!
In 3 days|It will be Marseille bank.
Red Alert,|24 hours a day!
we got support|one driver per team.
As soon as the germans quits the bank, our teams will follow them
...not loosing them, acting like a venom....
Guys, this is why |this operation will be called
...Cobra.
Petra, Can you please assemble the teams ?
3 per car. One driver of the GGM, one coodinator and one snipper.
each team as a code name and a position|written on the map behind you.
the teams members are listed next to the map.
You have 50 minutes to be in position.
Excuse me Petra, it's that Dinner we talked about...
...this week would be nice,|because...
...the computer software I developed, that we've talked about...
would be better|not to wait too long, somebody could steal the idea.
-No. just who can't wait|you or the software ? -Me
No, him..it, the software...|the computer.
you see it's complicated?|This is why Ithought...
...a dinner...
As soon as the German will be arrested,| I promise, I'm going to take care of you...
-...of the software I mean.|-Ah perfect.
-ah, in which team are you in ?|-With the Cobra.
Don't worry, you are lucky|I've put you in the best team.
he, I think there's no more coffee.
hey you've seen my steering wheel?|It's nice, it's mine...
...i gought it from Alain Prost.
with a new grip| special Dakkar.
Even with a load of sand in the car...
oh yeah?|too bad we aren't at the beach then.
Hey hey, don't smoke|it irritates my eyes
-No coffee, no smoking...|-No chicks !!
Boa calls TinySnake.|I repeat: Boa calls TinySnake.
-here is TinySnake, I listen.|-Yeah, it's Alan. is you team any good?
superb|we are exchanging our addresses.
-and you ? -Me, somebody is going to piss on us|beside that everything's fine.
Rachid, the small black Peugot behind ?
man! your crazy Marco!|We are not going to steal a car during the day !
Oh yeah, why not ?
fuck, Marco! its full of cops !
we don't know this neibourhood, we should stick to what we know
¡No problem, all the cops are at the airport !
-theres is none 20 Km.|around here -Man.
-isn't it crazy? -be calm man!|All cops are at the airport I told you!
I've seen it on TV there is Clinton|and his girl
hey Cops! look at Marco|he kisses you
-lets arrest him.|-No, let himm take the car,...
...let him finish is circus,|we need the space.
I need to take a leak.
No we can't leave the car, it's the orders.
You see? all at the airport like I said.
Smile guys, you are filmed
I tell you guys if they don't show up in one minute|with their Mercedes,...
...it's going to be coffee, smoke and washroom.
we're going to do all that later man!
to all the snakes... no venom| until the mouse gets out of its hole.
I repeat no venom until the exit.
-lieutenant?|-No Petra, you disturb me now, I was in it.
but it's the minister.
-mr. the Minister, Aren't you at the airport? -We just finished, tell me Gibert.
what about that Mercedes gang, you told me about...
Yes, you cannot call at a better time, we just localised them at the moment.|we are going to act soon.
Good, wait a second...
I just talked to the german minister|I stop you there
They won't have the time to visit Marseille
tonight they are in jail, tomorrow I send the Nazzis back to in their country.
...in a special cargo
...exactly I would't like to see this story end in |a shoot down between Germans and Frenchs
-the war is over Gibert.|-Ah certainly, Mr the Mister.
Perfectly, they are criminals |just like the others, they aren't treated differently
Maybe you should start by not calling them Nazzis.
-ah, I called them Nazzis?|-Yes.
-ah, I called them Nazzis?|-Yes.
I can count on you ?|Yes, don't worry, remember the Chineses
euh I mean the Asians.|everything went smoothly.
Almost no death|at least, not on our side.
Hello? Hello?|he hanged up !
you see it's easy.
-where are the cables.|-Shit, Marco! hurry up!
you move the car stupid|or you want me to bring you the keys?
We are the TinySnakes|and in tinySnake there is the word "cool"
we going to take it "cool" more than venimous.
To all the snakes, don't miss them,| we want them alive.
At least for an hour.
I don't feel in the mood,|I guess I better leave you guys.
and...|I really have to take a leak.
lets GO !!
-What is going on?|-Smells weird Mr the Minister.
Don't move Mr the Minister.
Shit !
we fell in a trap|send us backup.
I identified the car...
I repeat, I identified the accomplice car.
-4 well trained men.|-Backup are coming Mr the Minister!
shit, shit!
Sir., I think we are shooting on cops.
they are giving up there... no ?
hello, here is TinySnake|we had a small problem with the door.
Good morning Sir. Don't worry |we are going to free you in 5 minutes.
No problem, no problem|Thank you Sir
Here, there are giving up.
ah it's funny... he just look like...
like the Minister.
-oh, you didn't eat anything.|-ah today I'm not really hungry.
-Mom, no| -don't worry about your licences.
-Remember your father, he never got it -what, how possible?
-I remember him driving.whe I was young|-Yes, it's true
He did the exam 20 times|at the end they just gave it to him!
-Ah Thanks, I just feel better now|-You're welcome
here, David the lanlord son|he ask me if you could repair that.
Yeah, tell him my name isn't SuperMario.
No, I know your name is SuperCop|the one who enpower the law
...and protect citizens against evil.
oh dear, it's a nice profession you do|I'm proud you.
Oh yes !|this is why you tell everyone I work at IBM ?
You want me to bring you all the neighborhood tickets?
-No. -so it's ok, you work at IBM|you are quiet and so do I.
I I get to fix all the neighborhood electronic toys.
-Never happy.|-ah Mom, I'm kidding !
-can you call me a taxi? I will|be late. -I just met a perfect one !
Friendly, pleasant, the cream of the crop.|You'll like him very much.
hello ?
-am I on the wrong floor ?.|-Depends, on who you are looking for?
-looking for a Camille. -it's me.|he, I mean it's here.
-ah your are her son the one who works at Apple. -No: IBM. IBM. mom!
You know, me I don't know anything about that.|I saw your picture the other day,
ah DanielI present you my son Emilien.
I've put labels on them|monday Veal, tuesday...
Ok mom, I promise, I'll be ok.
Maybe we should go now|I left the car alone, I worried. Good bye !
-ah kiss.|-kiss, kiss mom !
-and where are we going ?|-the Voltaire boulevard.
-i remember the police station but not IBM.|-we are going to the police Station.
I install computer there.
if you don't mind, I'm going to leave you just before?|I don't really like hanging around the pigs.
-tell me, it makes a nice sound|for a taxi. -you know that well ?
just a fan
it's a V6, a little bit modified.|a motor, it just ask to "sing"
eh don't sing too loud,|the speed limit is 50.
-ah you're talking about the signs|written 50? -Yes.
I thought it was for Skateboards.
No, no, I think it's for anything that drives.
there is drive and drive, you see I'm at 100|good car...
...good pilot, I'm relaxed|no risks.
I'm less dangerous at 100 |then that shit at 20 km/h
there...
you've seen it ?
Yeah I saw it yeah !
-you're not affraid of radars?|-We know were there are the radars.
Pigs doesn't like changes.|Always eating at the same place.
you're going to see, there is one just there.|You see them, they are stupid !
Picture ! Picture !
You know they can't do anything about it|they just obey the system.
They joined in|nobody forced them.
sometimes I guess they were forced to join
-'cause you need to be stupid|to join the police forces. -Look,...
...i see them alot|...because of the computers.
the image I had of them is false.
oh yeah? it's worst then we hear of then?
No. it's better. There is not|just Dumb Ass in the police forces.
ah Yeah, there is also Alcoolics, crooks, idiots !
sincerely|between us...
...you know any normal person |who would want to join the Pigs barn ?
-and taxi drivers?|-what about them?
You know anybody that|would want to become a taxi driver ?
Those complaining guys that takes you|only when they want ?
the ones that screams at you|when the tip isn't right
And drinking in the coffee shops!
They are all friends with polices
Y se casan con una portera|para tener casa gratis.
you are not married with a lanlord ?
-No...|-Ah you've reassured me there !
Ok there is maybe a few drivers|rude with the customers
-But they are not all like you said.|-And? with the police it's the same thing.
They aren't all drunks at 6 in the morning|beating on an innocent.
Some of them do their jobs|Just like you... and like me.
Maybe, yeah maybe.
But the problem is that Taxi driver|isn't my real job.
Ah you do the taxi only for fun...|what is your real job then?
I'm going to show you.
Do you have a bag|I don't feel good.
Don't worry, as long as we drive|nothing will come out.
Shit!
I'm sorry sir|it's the first time it happens to me.
usualy the client gets out|walk a bit...then...
-I'm really sorry.|-I'm going to confess something.
Me too, it's not my real job...
-Oh, no.|-Oh, yeah.
-Last Name and first Name.|-Morales, Daniel.
Profession, I write crazy Taxi driver|or just Crazy driver ?
Whatever you want.
-At what speed were you going there?|-a small 90.
-a small 90. -Yes, it looks worst|It's because the motor really kicks.
...but in reality,|the car doesn't really goes forward
-eh, world champion, it going good ?|-yes very good.
-Can you go see in the stands|to see if I'm there?
remember the taxi, we saw it 5 minutes ago|on the avenue.
Going 190 Km/h.He slows downs!
you see? not 90... 190.
Ah must be the sun|I didn't see the 1 on the speedometer.
That's why I saw 90|If I had know, I would have slowed down.
anyway 90 is illegal.|the limit is 50... for everybody!
cars, skateboard|Taxis... everybody !
he's happy now? caught me|did his work, he's happy now.
My licence is my life|if tonight I'm walking, tomorrow I'm dead.
You're going to be friendly, and finish me quickly.
He slow down, I can enjoy it a bit.
Usualy I'm the one screamed at all day|for one time I'm lucky.
-i didn't knock because of my wrist.|-Ah it doesn't matter.
-that you didn't knock I mean.|-Thank you.
-your diner, your software that can't wait.|-Yes?
so it will wait until|I don't have any scarves.
unless you want to have diner|with a scarecrow.
I doesn't bother me...|you're perfect Petra.
it's not important... I mean no...|yes it matters
It's Important.|it's very bad for you...
... but for me.. |for the software it doesn't matter
ah you see !|All day it's like that.
if only I could catch |those German bastards
you finish me ?|You are going to see, you'll feel better.
Yeah, I have to...|unless you have an idea.
-i can promise no to do it again?|-I said an Idea, not a stupidity.
I'm talkin about a real idea|of public interest.
-want to turn me in a dog shit Picker?|-No!
something of public interest,|for me. Understand?
It's like I represent the public...
... and you do something in my interest.
-Ah you want money !.|-Argh you're really stupid!
Tell me clearly what you want|It's been 1 hour with your |yadi yadi yada
-What do you want?|-Listen.
The Mercedes gang|that rings a bell ?
No, the obnly gangs I know|would be in scooter.
they're a gang specialized in robbing banks|yesterday was the 7th.
-And that make my chier sick.|-Ah that is bad.
yes, mostly for us.|listen, I make you a proposal.
you're a good mecanic, and driver|and me I need a driver.
3 good reasons to hire you| as an Intern for 1 month.|I remove all your infractions.
-you want me to do the cop for 1 month?|-choose, cop or pedestrian.
-Death or Shame?|-yep, you understood well!
Here you have all 7 attacks|in order.
Don't know much Mercedes|I'm more Ferrari.
right now the gang is "Mercedes"|but as soon they get in Ferrari, I'll call you.
-a red Mercedes so horrible. |-yeah red, look at somethign we don't know.
we looked everywhere|but maybe...
-we just need a detail.|-what detail?
your gang.|They are German.
ah nice! Mercedes: Germans. |you want to relax 5 minutes now?you must be exausted.
Tires are much inflated|typical of Germans.
Also they have 8"|they had to do it in Germany| 'cause can't find that in France.
Tires are quite used|they will need to order some soon.
On this picture, the muffler is a little bent|but not on this one.
they must have bent it during an attack|and repaired it after.
Kruger is the only one who repairs this type in Marseille.
And Kruger is German.
Lucky that you are not a Mercedes expert !
-where are we going? -We're starting with Kruger|to see if he remembers anything.
what are you waiting for to go?|you want me to sing a song ?
in this neighbourhood, I wouldn't put the chrismat light.
-what are we doing now? -we beging the phase that takes 80% of a policeman life...
...Observation.
familiarise with the terrain,|observation of enterings/exits
...and analyse the situation.
At the closing, we will go ask a few questions to Mr Kruger.
-at what time does the store closes?|-Kruger? he's never closes, he's insomniac.
Thanks!
They didn't had anything else.
Ah too bad we didn't stop by at my mother|she makes terrific sandwiches
Ham and Cheese.|half Bayonne, half Parisian.
-It's wonderful.|-she made you one ? -Yeah.
a small slice of cheese in the middle|with lettuce.
...and pickles.|Fabulous.
-it's mine?|-ah, really good, congratulation.
-what does he do?|-They are Koreans.
a real pain in the ass for my job|they work 24hours a day
-he must sleep at some point,|they are humans. -No, they got a "technique"
One taxi, one plate,|one licence,...
...and 2 drivers.
-you've seen any difference between |2 koreans -Incredible.
ah I know a Korean|he does food as a business.
No. we wait first that |he closes his garage.
we are going to wait long,|the guy is insomniac and never closes.
-how do you know that?|-the bar owner just in front.
why didn't you tell it before?
I haven't been in the police forces long|I don't have the reflexes.
it's not a problem of being a cop|it's just common sense, Shit!
we are here like 2 idiots|waiting for an insomniac to go to sleep !
does that sounds logical to you?
If I'm the mercedes driver|and I know that the mecanis is insomniac...
...I'll come during the night,|it's much more discrete.
oh yeah? you think that the driver will just show up...
...with his nice Mercedes?
I can't believe it !
A driver when it doesn't drive|is always in a Garage.
-What are they doing there ? -probably the 8"|tires they ordered from Kruger.
It's a miracle|I can't let go such an opportunity.
if it goes bad,call the station |and give the Mercedes plates numbers.
-where are you going?|-after observation, action.
-the Korean trick.|-What?
the Korean trick !
what an idiot !
and the new tires|where they are going to put them?
-what are you doing there?|-Me? sleeping.
I don't have a house, my country is very cold.
please! ¡don't hurt me|I just wanted to sleep.
I'm going to find you a house |where you'll sleep...
and even eat maybe with a little chance.
-hey you're hurting me!|-I just do what I can.
-what is your name?|-Daniel.
Ah, yeah. Daniel.|I'm Emilien.
-we are going to call each other by name,it'll be better.|-yeah better.
Now that we are friends,|what just happened...
it stays between us...
when you are going to release my had,|will I be able to go to sleep?
I'm no insomniac or Korean.
certainly.
I waited for you all night.
it was on purpose,|so that you really want me.
you won't regret waiting.
Promises, promises.|let me see what you can do.
ah not too bad|a little bit more.
what? What is going on?
it's 6 am and we are not sunday.|We are monday.
you can't do that Lily.|I waited all night.
-and me? I played dominos?|-can't you call in sick?
sick on monday morning?|My boss will really like it.
for sure nobody did that one.
can happen to anybody|to be sick monday morning.
you went to eat at your parents|you ate too much...
...and you pucked all night.|it's possible, no?
a man that works all week|and go on sunday.
you think it's possible ?
I'm so sorry, Lily.|I had a shitty day.
i promise that if you accept a diner here|tonight I'll explain everything.
Ok, light meal|I don't want to be sick tuesday morning.
yes, short time at the table |and long time in bed.
we could even eat in bed to save time.
you'd better be good, |it's your last chance
I'm going to impress you.
we are going to wait again |all day in front of the garage?
observation is finished,|now questioning.
are you interested to see|a real questioning?
-no.|-No you're going to come anyway.
I won't be useful|I'm better with the Taxi in case shit.
I need a translator|I don't want him to confuse me with technicalities.
Kruger won't have time to kick me out ,|I'm telling you.
Good morning people.
which one of you is called Kruger,|please?
it's written on the label| just like a waitress.
Mr Kruger,|got a few questions.
don't worry|it won't be long.
-Fuck no more munitions!|-what for? they are long gone.
-yeah? -open you eyes,|there is nobody here.
ah yeah, nobody.
-can I ask you a small question?|-What?
you questionings|are always like that, or was it to please me?
Usualy I ask at least 1 question.
let's go out to get some air.
-you know, you saved my life there.|-No. -Yes.
was worth a big|lets get rid of that month of labor.
and I turn it into a 1 week only.
-Ah you know how to deal.| -I need to catch that ganf, it's important|for me.
-because of the blonde chick?|-No.
In part yes,|but mostly for me.
I'm tired of finishing all nights|in the garbage cans.
it's a question of honor,|maybe it's crazy, but I need this,
-can I have the night for myself?|-Hey, certainly you're kidding.
-Can I borrow him?|-Mom, it's because...
I lost my prescription|the doctor agreed to do an other one.
They are closing in 5 minutes.|It's my heart medecine.
I won't let you die here|and this way I will have save the whole familly today.
-you're so charming, Daniel.|-I know, I know.
-look Johnny, here they come.|-Don't worry baby.
I've put a transmittter in that bullet|this way they can't get away.
-ah you're so clever Johnny|-It's my job baby.
-Johnny.|-now we just have to follow them.
-Incredible!|-...let's save your father.
-I'll never foget what you've done for me Johnny.|-It's my job baby.
Guys, |we just received a call there.
now, they really give us a rendez vous.
gonna be|The Marseille Bank.
since there are precise with us|I'm going to be with you.
I won't tolerate any misbehavior, accident|Nothing!
perfect coordination.
2 words to this mission...
Serenity...
...and efficiency.
So I decide |to name this mission
the mission...
...Zen.
chief!
let go the tinysnakes and cobras|I just got the idea of the century.
the mercedes gang will be nailed tonight|otherwise I'm not called Emilien Barbadec.
I hope you plan is fool proof|'cause this is your last bullet.
you got that bullet|so be kind don't miss.
Everybody on the floor!|Quick!
Hands on the head!
Lie down ! Don't move.
Come on!
-It's working.|-good, very good.
Follow them at a distance.
so you won't be scared.
They stopped. Gauguin Street.|i tell you we got them.
Here is Gilbert.
all units: close the |Gauguin street at 10 Km. around.
they didn't move.|just one street.
what's happening?
-the dot disapeared.|-I saw that it disapeared.
-find why it vanished.|-they must be this way,...
...a red Mercedes |doesn't go by unnoticed.
The're close, I can feel it.
they are supposed to be here.
go, go !
Don't shoot|i'm the hostage.
Emilien...
how...?
I don't understand|I'm missing something.
A red Mercedes vanished.|even Copperfield never did it.
Hi. Paper|please
what is happening Mr the Officer?
-You're German?|-Yes Why?
Already at the frontier?
Chief, 4 Germans in a Mercedes|not red. interested?
I'm taking it.
-so you're Germans.|-Yes, it's a problem?
no, it's good acually.|Open the trunk.
-what are they doing in Marseille?|-They came to spend Deutch Mark,...
-...but they can do that in an other country if you prefer... -No,...
...I prefer that you keep that|in our territory.
Ok goodbye.|Have a nice stay.
Emilien.
i don't understand, it's impossible.|I must have forgot a detail.
-you see, he forgot the kettle.|-you think so? it's not his type.
it's 8 pm. i've put the answering machine|the alarm at 6.
-We've got 10 hours. should be enough, no?|-I think it's going to be tight,...
...but we can hurry just a bit at the end.
Waiting for somebody?
yes my lover, but when I knew you'd come|I cancelled.
-who could it be?|-let, they will probably go.
-where were we?|-i was kissing you.
no You were kissing me.
-if it was important?|-how?
I don't know... the cops...
Ah yes, if you were a notorious criminal|and they come to get you.
you would take me hostage .|and if you would just take me?
-Open, Police!|-you didn't kill anybody?
No.
god, Daniel!|you are there !
Fantastic!
-you just can't imagine in what shit I am.|-Yes I can imagine.
No, no you can't imagine.
It's gone, we don't have a flat anymore.
the flat that my father gave us.
-gone in smoke, just like my father.|-My husband smoked a lot,...
...but he died of liver cancer, |we never knew why he didn't drink
the flat is nothing. the worst| is that I messed up again.
If I don't catch them 'til the end of the week| I'm going to circulation on monday.
Stick, wistle, hello kids !
it's like to say, monday I'm dead.
-Daniel, who's that dwarf?|-A friend
Yes? |Playing with smufs now?
-It's a bit complicated,|hes a cop... What?
-you've got a friend in the police?|-Not a real friend,...
-...I work for him, because...|-You work for the cops?
No, not for the cops, for him!l!|He's not really a cop,...
...looks more like a secret agent|, something like that.
and the old lady is Mata Hari.
cana nybody explain her?|I won't be able.
Hi.|my name is Camille.
the smurf sit there|is my son, Emilien.
I tou wan to show me the kitchen,|I'm going to make a good cofee.
-and I'll explain everything.|-There is nothing to explain mom,...
...I'm done, I'm in the street it's finished.|but it had nicely started...
but then came the garbage bin, the butcher, the Mercedes...
And? What do you do with those|want me to call the cops, the real ones?
be friendly, don't complicate the situation|ok agree ?
I'm not complicating the situation.
I just want to finish calmly|what we had started.
And I don't want to waste and hour|because we are quite tight on the schedule.
I got caught in the harbour|when I say caught I mean seriously.
I could loose my licences for 100 years.
I help him and he give me back my licence, |100 year of unemployment you see?
Police, Singer, Smurf
Nice portrait, you could have finished him| before putting him in circulation.
Here you go|was completely stupid of me.
I'm not kidding|you're free.
Take it.
Daniel, you know|I didn't came here for our deal.
i ain't got any other friends|Mom told me you had a big heart.
"Daniel has a big heart.|No, he'll help?."
Ok I think we made a mistake|it doesn't matter.
it's not important, it's not your problem.
Don't worry.|I'll catch that gang alone.
As a pedestrian, won't be easy|But I'm gonna do it.
Listen, the best way to get rid of him,| is to solve his problem.
But he doesn't have A problem,| he's got tons.
Look at his face, |he reminds me of "silence of the lambs".
You take care of Mata Hari|and me of the Smurf.
-In 2 hours I'm back. |-And what do I do with the lady for 2 hours?
-we play bingo?|-Please, Lily.
-if in 2 hours you're not there|I burn the lady. -It's a deal.
-Come on. -where are we going?|-solve your problem.
I'm sorry to have ruined your evening.
-you coffee is really good?|-The best in town.
a small coffee to change the mood|and to get forgiveness.
I know you don't really want to talk to me anymore|But listen please.
-ok?|-1 minute going to be ok?
yes, I though of it all night|there was a question I couldn't answer.
why are they |pissing us off like that?
why red Mercedes|when grey is much more discrete?
to get our attention:|look here, then...
...it appears there.|It's a diversion.
Conclusion: i think they left the building empty handed|and the money took an other road.
or maybe the money is still in the bank.
1 minute, end of the show.
I'll be back later.
-10 gran.|-Thank you very much.
-to help paying the rent for the next few years.|-And my wife?
-you really want it?|-he, I'm used to it now.
Calm down dear.
Now, everything's going to be fine.
"one other bank, and we retire"
And for the last one, I suggest we finish greatly.
-Emilien. ¡Emilien!|-Leave me.
if I tell you how they changed| from a red to a grey mercedes.
-Go. -they didn't changed car,| they changed color.
a nice red Mercedes |enters a parking,...
...and a classic grey mercedes| exist and disapear.
-It's posible.|-like stealing candy from a kid.
If they did repaint the car|we would have found paint traces somewhere.
Except if they used a truck| to get the car in.
they need to buy tons of paint| if they do that each time.
they did that in a record time|they didn't have 10 minutes.|Does it exist a paint dry in 10 mins.
Hello, Gegé? sorry for waking you up,|it'sDaniel.
i need your magic paint|, the MD10.
Color metal grey.
you ran out?|Who could have bought all that in one shot?
at the "circuit des étangs"?
What are they doing with that much paint|they want to paint the circuit in red ?
No, ok, don't worry|I'll try dealing with them.
Talk to you soon, thanks man.
-what does it mean MD10?|-Minus 10 minutes.
and? You like my theory?
-you think it's them? -no those are the butchers |training like every tuesdays.
Explain to me Daniel.|what is the plan?
-what are you doing?|-We are going to say hi !.
-They are going to see us.|-Yep, we will make it so they won't forget us.
They are going to remember me|they saw me well in the trunck.
-Put that on.|-ah shit.
is is ok like that ?
It's perfect.
hey faggots, everything ok?|think you are Schumacher?
you spin aroun the circuit.|what are those small car?
Mercedes?
thay build cars too?|the german know how to play tortuce and hare?
He doesn't know how to play?|I'm going to teach him.
give me 55.
-maybe i should get out now, no?|-No, you'll see they are playful.
The Tortuce and hare goes like this:...
...55 to the one that pass my car over 2 laps. 1 + 1.
-You know how to count?|-We don't want the money.
I said 55 because I had a good consience not to take you more.
but a tourist that doesn't get robbed|is not really a tourist no ?
Look in your rearv view mirror in case I'd already be behind you|after the 1st lap.
so it wouldn't be worth an doing an extra lap.
Thanks girls !
Get lost| Quick !
it's not that I'm bored|but I gotta go to the garage.
I don't know what going on with my car|It just does run fast anymore.
It's when you want for a rematch.
-here are your 55. -What are we doing now?|-lets get a drink.
Frenchs...
You're completely crazy we had the gang.|and you do the stupid?
-we could have called backups and got them!|-Yeah, for what motive?
-speeding... on a circuit?|-Oh, the evidences.
the evidence we would have found them later|we are used to that.
We needed to catch them in the act,| this is what you've said? Yes or no?
but for the moment we only collect offences .
If we continue, it's us who will be jailed.
you're going to have it your flag
now they are all warmed up|nobody's more playful than a pilot
Now we can buid them|a trap.
-Yeah? What kind of trap?|-A trap for idiots.
-And what is your "idiot trap"?|-not an "Idiot Trap".
-I said a trap for Idiots.|-Ok. how does it goes?
it goes like this|we bring them where we want.
An this is: here.
We will need 20 Red Light keys|and 20 Super Walkie-Talkies.
Walkie-Talkie ok|but keys, the guys always carry them.
Except when they take their shower.
-Oh no?|-Oh yes.
-Oh no?|-oh yes.
your talentful!
Here you go, Jimmy.
-it's going to take time, I'm freezing.|-one minute.
Emilien, I got one...
What are you doing naked ?
I'm not naked.|I got a towell wrapped around me.
And what do you care?
I got the rights to be naked in my office, no ?
-It's my office no ?.|-Yes.
nobody teached you to knock before entering ?
you've never learned anything idiot!
Oh, what a welcome|I wanted to tell you a good joke.
Your jokes are never funny|get out !
Ah! it feel so good!
COME IN!
Petra...!
-am I disturbing?|-Never!
Yes, I see that I'm disturbing.|I'll come back later.
for once she comes into my office|with something to tell me...
...I'm naked in the middle of the office.|you believe that Daniel?
What can I say?|Anyway look at that...
She so beautiful.|She's already Sergent.
-what could she do with a guy like me?|-Ho, ho. Enough.
You're done whining ?|You already started digging your grave.
she's not lady charity.|engine like her doesn't work with gas-oil.
What she need is a MAN.
Get straight|you look more like an monkey now.
Stand up straight!
Now you go see her and you kiss her|that's it.
You either get a slap in the face|or you got her for at least 10 years.
There's a 50/50 chance.|if it doesn't work at least you'll know.
It's like a game show,|you got it or not.
Are you ok, Emilien?|Are you ok?
You are right|we should not worry like that.
I got for it|I got it.
-it was a 50/50.|-he will get some other chances.
-Where are we with the keys?|-Done !
Take them.
You think they are going to be mad?
A girl shows up 17 hours late|what do you do ?
-I kill her.|-so you got your answer!
But we got flowers there.
-Oh the nice flowers!|-Can we smoke them?
-you bake all those cakes?|-Yes.
Since we don't make love both,|we got revenge on cakes.
What a crisis!
Thanks, Camille.|I had a wonderful day.
For me the flowers?|Thanks goodbye.
You don't want to have a intimate evening ?
YOu got visitors Daniel|you have to take care of them.
We will do it an other day,we are not 1 day short.
Camille will sleep in you bed|her back hurts.
Good night boys.
-God, it's good stuff.|-sure it's Jamaican.
-You see not only bad thing in the forces.|-STop it you are tempting me.
Tell me, why didn't you race directly|instead of doing it with a Taxi ?
My father spent is life in a wheel chair|because of a car accident.
how could I explain him I wanted to be a race pilot.
-I see. -And you? What did you do|to finish in that bad position?
My story isn't bad either.
My dad died when I was 17,|we were alone my mother and I.
So I had to go work right away.
And with no degree, only the cops wants you.
-Where did you lived?|-at Asnières.
-at Jules Ferry?|-Yes. Why?
-You too?|-Yes, I swear.
It's crazy|we could have ended up in the same class.
I would have teach you to steal bikes|you wouldn't have turned that bad!
life is like that, you dream about so many things|when you are kid, finally...
...nothing goes as planned.
you dream of playing in front|you end up goalie.
You think it's going to work our plan Daniel ?
it will roll.
Are you sure?
Come in.
I am disturbing?
No, now i'm fine.|What do you need?
Red Alert!
Guys, the cougar plan is started.
it about the S.D.L.M. banks.
Here are you positions|for today.
Arthur, at the crossroads Nº 1.|Jacky, Nº 2,...
...at National Flamarion crossroads.|Momo at the crossroads de Le Beché.
Nº 2, radio and key.|Nº 3, radio and key. Nº 4...
Yes?
-Yes I know you come back in 1 hour.|-Exactly.
I'll wait for you at your place.
Cougar speaking|the bird is in the cage.
Everybody quiet!|on your knees!
Cougar speaking. the bird will soon get ot of his cage.
Prepare yourselves.
Shit they got hostages,|don't do anything for the moment.
-sorry no more room for you.|-ok no problem.
you're going to run next to the car|won't be bad for you
i'm tired!
Shit! All cougars units get out|Catch the bird.
Catch the bird!
You see it's not the Mercedes we needed to follow...
it's the Mercedes truck we needed to follow.
This needs a cheers !
and now we all go home!|Cheers! Cheers!
It's a go.
-Everything's ready?|-20 strategic points blocked.
If they cross any of these diagonals|they are caught like rats.
They take the Michelet Boulevard,|they going to end up on place Mazard.
Who's on that corner?
-Jean-Bat, Nº 7. |-Call him he will be the opening act.
Nº 7, Jean-Bat.|You hear me?
-Yes, listening.|-YOu're going to be the first, You are in position?
-Yes no problem.|-So it's our turn now.
-It doesn't fit there.|-Yes, yes.
Hey the bavarians, how are you|Still in tractor ?
sorry for the last time|I had forgot the handbrake, that's why I didn't go forward.
He I'm talking to you.|Now it's a lot better.
-we do an other Tortuce/hare or you stay ridiculous? -Ok.
ok., you frenchs|always got that big mouth
-Come on the highway with me, we'll see!|-did I upset you?
-I'm going to explode your Peugeot!|-Sorry, I did upset you.
I give you an other chance,|but I won't put much this time.
I feel cheap taking money from you so easily.|Here you go my chick, 10 franks.
-You're going to pay for you insolence.|-better be insolent than ridiculous !
-I think you exagerated a bit.|-no, no, tell 7, 8 and 9 to go on red.
Jean-Bat, go on red now.
-Nº 10, in position.|-Nº 11, in position.
Perfect. 12 and 13, prepare yourselves.
here is number13, ok,|but I got a small problem here.
-There is 2 cop stuck to the red light.|-Shit!
-destick them!|-¡Easy to say! They are well stuck.
We are getting there, find a solution|otherwise we are done.
Pollo, let me talk to the cops.
Sorry sir, it's for you.
-Helo. -I am Sergent Gibert.|we found a bomb and it's just next to you.
-Where?|-in the red light.
Stay calm|we know how to stop the mecanism.
Listen carefuly: put the key in the light |and make the light turn red.
-it's already red! -don't worry about the color
...just turn the key to the right!
Yes, yes, Mr Sergent.
-we've just past the 12.|-hurry up ! hurry up!
Can I do it?
-19 and 20, get ready. after 20|there's nothing. -I know.
-Are you sure it's the road there ?|-It's a shortcut.
On the highway, they are dead.|We got more power.
-if there was a fence, maybe there was a reason.|-Yep the highway isn't finished, it's a deadend.
The important is that you know it.
-I look calm like that|in fact I'm not. -Won't be long.
-this is what worries me,|I want to live long. -10 seconds.
Eat that rat!
-Got to stop there is no bridge!|-5 seconds.
GO! ¡Eat him! Eat him!
Let them win Daniel|you've just bet 10 franks !
-I don't want to die for 10 franks!|-it's now or never ! Hold on !!!
Very good, Karl!|We won!
are you sure?
I swear, you scared me!
I really thought|you rather die than loose.
between the Toruce and the hare|it's always the tortuce that wins!
Einstein! You know "La Fontaine"?
Big hare not happy to been f*cked by little Tortuce.
Cougar will be happy|long time he wanted to eat hare.
Yes, big hare|big hare.
I'm sorry for the place.
It's not very romantic.
-But I really wanted.|-Oh yes?
You really wanted... I didn't felt it.
We do a revenge?
No. later.|We really got to go now.
Daniel, What are you doing|it's been 15 minutes I've been looking for you.
-What were you doing in the dark?|-Photo finishing.
It's not the momen for photo finishing.|the sergent is waiting!
In the name of the president of the Republica,...
...it's an honor to offer you| the medal of the merit knight.
Congratulation.
-I owe you some appologies.|-for not believing in me or slapping me?
Both.|How can you forget me?
we are going to find out.
I read the story of your exploits.
Amazing!
This experience made us think.|Thanks.
We are going to change the way we see the road.
We are going to implement a police force| more efficient and modern.
-And all that thanks to you.|-Thanks.
This medal is only a symbol|it won't give you your licence back.
-I was hoping for more...|-Mercy? -Exactly.
We've got mercy|we got enough to put you in jail for many years...|but you are free.
-I'm not free, I'm on foot now.|-I understand.
without a car |you are like an orphin.
-Yes an orphin on foot|-I understand.
I got a solution|but I'm not sure it will fit you.
Say it we are going to see.
-eh? you are happy?|-Yes.
-you're not happy?|-Yes it's super.
I dont'understand. Your first Grand Prix|first line-up, a super car, friends,...
-...your girlfriend. What's wrong?|-an other sponsor!
We find him money, a car|and Mr is still not happy.
Tell the cheerleader to stop moving|it distract me.
-you know what you could do|that would make me happy? -What?
Win that race! Because we don't give a damn| about the sponsors on the car.
Ok then, Take out the Champagne out of the freeze|it's not good too cold.
Let's go, Daniel!
TLF - The In-Laws
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